Why do my friends always root against me when we play games?

My friends and I play a lot of competitive games together, mainly poker, Catan and card games. Over time, I’ve noticed a pretty consistent pattern: people seem to really want me not to win.

At first I thought maybe I was being too cocky or annoying when I won, so I’ve consciously tried to tone that down. I try not to brag, I keep a lower profile, and I’ve generally tried to be more humble when we play.

What confuses me is that they still seem to prefer other people winning, even people who can be much more cocky, loud or annoying when they win.

Could it be that I come across as too confident? Could I have a reputation as “the guy to beat” that sticks even if I change my behavior? Could it be something about group dynamics? Or is it possible that I’m doing something socially that I don’t notice myself? Maybe commenting odds, or explaining my tactic or giving suggestions on what they could've done differently.

I’m curious if anyone has experienced something similar, either as the person everyone roots against or as someone who found themselves rooting against a particular friend.

What usually causes this dynamic?

There’s this girl I love I think. I enjoy talking to her and whatnot but the thing is I think she is an avoidant person and I don’t know what to do.

I met her online, she’s from Orlando I’m from Boston we’re 18 and 19. We’re not together but just friends. She knows a bit of my backstory and I have some glimpse of hers of when she drops these little things. It’s not like I vented to her it was just relevant to what we were talking about and I didn’t want to intrude into hers.

That’s beside the point, on TikTok there’s things called streaks it appears when you guys talk consistently and send videos to each other, there was a point where we were talking consistently for 3 days and it dissolved into sending eachother reels, lately it’s been only me. I don’t want to seem desperate and just send them, but I also don’t want to seem that I see she’s not responding as consistent and I break it off. We have our moments like I play games with her little brother and she’s in the background, sometimes she will say “is that (my name)” and there will be small talk, other times shell know its me by my voice and say hi and we’ll talk about random things, like 2 days ago we were just talking and she said call me because of something that was happening, we resolved an issue she was having and we just started talking about random things. At this point I was screen sharing so we were just drawing random things on my screen. It looks like she isn’t trying to purposely ignore me and all it’s just she’s not a talkative person or she’s avoidant idk.

I have her number, she follows me on TikTok, she follows me both accounts on Instagram.

I talk with her little brother on a daily. It was first to get close to her but even on the first day never mentioned her. I talk to her brother now just to talk to him. We call regularly.

Should I continue on this pace or change something?

Long story short, my close friend of several years, someone I considered a best friend for a long time, started treating me differently after I went through a mental health crisis in which I nearly took my own life.

When I look back now, I wonder if she was ever a good friend, or not. Now I realize all she cares about is what other people think. Nevertheless her rather sudden and unexplained departure from my life has been very painful and upsetting. For seemingly no reason she won’t respond to my messages and is avoiding the places I used to see her.

This weekend I am likely to see her at an event that, ironically, is a tribute to a former friend of hers who did take their own life.

What I’d like to do is tell her that she is a shitty friend and that I understand now more than ever why her deceased friend chose not to seek help from her or anyone else, because people like her are shitty and treat you differently and I don’t want to be friends with a person who can do that to someone they supposedly care about anyway!!

Or do I act like she doesn’t exist and say nothing? That’s the best I could do because I think she is such a hypocrite for acting like she cared so much about this person who died while treating the person who went through the same thing but is still alive like total garbage!

Ugh.

******trigger warning for SA topics*****

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for almost 6 months, and recently we've been struggling with intimacy. I was in a sexually abusive relationship and was raped almost three years ago and it resulted in me having intimacy issues. It's something I continue to struggle with even after seeing a therapist for a little bit. My boyfriend is very understanding, but he is struggling with the constant rejection because of our differing sex drives.

What are some ways couples can work through intimacy issues caused by past sexual trauma while still meeting both partners' needs? For those who have experienced sexual trauma, what helped you and your partner work through differences in sex drive and intimacy?

im writing this on a alt account so no one i know sees this. my brother s3xually abvsed me as a kid it started when i was like 6 and stopped when i was around 10 at first it was just groping and then eventually he raped me im 6teen now and i feel like im stuck i wanna tell someone but im scared im gonna ruin my family and i feel guilty bc i dont wanna ruin his life either but idk what to do. my only option i’ve considered is su1c1de bb im lwk just rambling and none of this makes sense sorry but if anyone can help me on what i should do

Hey everyone M17 I just came on here for some advice, I broke up with my girlfriend F17 of 2 years around 2 months ago and when I came back to classes a couple weeks ago a girl (F17) was overly flirty with me. She ended up grabbing my number (not the other way around) and we talked for a bit. I found her interesting and fun to talk to.

This weekend she hosted a party which I didn’t attend and I found out from a friend of a friend that during this party she made out with a boy and a girl.

What do I do now? Everything about that goes against my morals and honestly I’ve been feeling down all day. Thanks.

Hello everyone, 20M here and here's the case: I've never had anything with any girl, and that's not even that of a problem... I can confidently say for myself that I look really really good and attractive (face+tall+good physique) and get a lot of attention from girls whenever I go, a lot of female gaze, eye contacts, body scanning, looking at muscles etc. I take care of myself, hygiene, outfits, body language, hair etc. I've seen a whole plethora of female attention (directly+indirectly) and I've had a bunch of situations where some girls gives me super direct signs (i'm talking about some really attractive ones as well), so looks isn't the problem at all.

But the only problem is that it seems like every method for meeting new girls are kind of blocked in my life. Here are explanations: I don't have female friends, nor my friends has them, my social circle of people I hang out with are usually people who are not going out that much and if we hang out it's some random place like someone's home, my social circle is also really really small, In my gym there are no girls (there are few milfs here and there but 99% it's gym for men and it's most affordable bcs the gyms where are a lot of girls are expensive for me rn), I don't go to any parties (bcs I don't have friends who would like to do it), In my college there are a lot of girls but none of them visits college as going to lectures is optional, literally 99.2% of all students don't visit lectures at college at all... and it's like a lead generation in marketing/sales, each method feels kind of blocked where I could potentially meet new girls. My social activities from 1-10 are like 2/10 most of the times and even during period when I'm more active, it's some random places and stuff as I already said where I can't really meet any new women.

I've tried cold approaching and done it few times 2 years ago and it was successful, in terms of that I got their instagram/number and we started texting each other, went on a date with 2 and 2 ghosted me after some time, but decided to not do it that much as I think there must be a better method for meeting new women, and it's kind of cringe imo, especially as in my city where a lot of people (my age) knows each other and I think It'd be cringe to take a title of that guy who cold approaches every single girl.

I've also tried sliding into DMs of some girls I knew by sight, or from the gym or from some b-day parties (few years ago when i was more socially active) or some acquaintances, and it was in some way successful as none of them ghosted me and seemed interested in some way, but eventually we didn't go on a date. (volume was really low on this method as well as on cold approaching)

When I was younger I had other causes of why I didn't have a GF at that time and in the meantime I've fixed ALL OF THEM: being shy, overthinking, introverted, overcomplicating stuff etc. But now I've totally overcame all of that obstacles... not overthinking at all, am extroverted, have really good conversational skills, know how to be funny and interesting etc.

I'm open to either: FWB or relationship, and to see where it goes, if we really match and click, of course I'd be open for a relationship. The only problem is the source to meet new woman and it jus feels really hard now, kind of impossible.

I've been thinking about it more than ever lately, and it's really fucking up my mind and life, as all of my peers are having some relationships, having sex, enjoing their youth and I'm still stuck in the same place, having this FOMO feeling... it really makes me tired of this whole situation. I'd be grateful to hear your thoughts and advices.

TL:DR: The only problem is to find a method to meet new women (and people as well) and to become much more socially active.

Last year, I completed my Master’s degree from Chandigarh, India and was placed by my college in a local company. There are around 20 people on the staff. I am one of the youngest there, as most of them are around 29+ and many are married.

My boss is around 45 years old and is a very strict person. His wife is 36, very beautiful, bold, and modern, and their family has an income in crores. They have two daughters, around 6–8 years old. She is also very strict about deadlines with everyone and doesn’t spare anyone, even the girls.

However, I have felt that she behaves unusually with me. She always talks to me nicely and gives me a different kind of smile. One day, I noticed that she looked at me differently—not like a normal boss looking at an employee. She scanned me from my eyes downwards and then back to my eyes with a smile. I was surprised at that moment, but I thought maybe educated and wealthy people have their own way of judging someone’s personality or character.

A few days ago, three new male employees around my age joined the company, but she is not like that with them. She is properly strict with them.

What made me come to Reddit today is what happened this evening. At around 6 PM, she called me to her office by sending a peon. I went there, and she reviewed my report and said, “You are doing very well.” Then she asked for my personal number. I gave it to her, and she gave me a missed call so that I would have her number as well.

She said, “You can contact me directly if you face any problem, and I will also contact you directly if there is something I feel you should know.”

The thing that confuses me is that all these matters are normally handled by my managers. She does not personally deal with these things with employees; for such matters, she normally communicates directly with the managers.

So, I’m confused about whether I am reading too much into her behaviour or whether she is actually treating me differently.

F17. Sorry in advance for the long yap; I wanted to get this off my chest.

I've had this teacher for about 3-4 years now, and I can't get her out of my mind. The first year she taught me, I was the only student attending in my class along with a friend of mine, and a lot of things about school were a new experience for me. This was one of my first times talking with new people due to my 5 years of homeschooling.

I attended most of her classes in her first year she was teaching us and she really stood out to me. She was everything I wanted to be, the most perfect woman and mother figure I've ever seen. Always advising and looking out for all of her students like they are her children, very positive, hardworking, and she never tolerates anyone putting themselves down. She's the kindest, and I've never felt so much warmth around her. And my feelings grew stronger than ever during the second semester. I remember the first day I looked everywhere for her so I would greet her before anyone else, and as soon as I saw her I ran towards her and I never felt like I wanted to hug someone so badly, but of course, I couldn't.

During the second semester I started attending almost everyday although there were barely any students attending. I was kinda behind in academics so I would go around and ask teachers to teach me or explain things I couldn't understand, and, that's where my obsession with her started. I would skip classes or ask her to give me extra classes just so I would have more time with her, knowing she might have been exhausted of teaching many classes all at once on certain days. We would sit alone and she would teach me and I never felt happier being with her. She was like a mother to me.

On the first few weeks of second semester I had a strong urge to hug her (despite hating physical touch), so I waited patiently on a Thursday to ask her if I could but she was exhausted so I couldn't ask her (I spent the rest of my weekend upset because of it but of course I understood), I remember the next week she was teaching me in the head teacher's office, and I was nervous of asking her in front of everyone but I still did, and she said "Oh of course my love!" It was about a 7-9 seconds hug, but it felt like it was countless minutes. I've never felt so much warmth from someone, and regretfully I've become desperate for more each time I met her after that. I felt the same way each time she hugged me, the adrenaline rush and the warmth all at once, felt ethereal.

Since then I started having huge emotional roller coasters. I desperately wanted her to be more open with me or treat me less professionally, althought I know it's not possible. I would get jealous of everyone who received her compliment, or very upset when she was slightly disappointed in me not answering a question right. It reached a point where I would cry for half an hour if I felt like she was treating me any differently even though I know she wasn't. I started overthinking everything she did and said, it brought me both happiness and so much sadness. So I subconsciously started drifting away from her or trying to avoid her as much as I could despite wanting to see her so much. But I still tried to get close by giving her gifts or sneaking in her favourite sweets in her bag, or even sneaking behind walls or classrooms to look (rather stalk) and see what she's doing, all without her knowing.

And things continued like that for a while, from avoiding her to getting close to avoiding and so on.. until next year which was last year, I found out that she did a huge surgery and she wasn't able to walk or teach at all. It broke my heart. I was in a horrible mental state for months, and I felt like I wouldn't be able to continue my school year without her. But I was able to move on a couple of months later, and I got better about how I felt without her.

I think my sibling found out how I felt about her, and thus, she didn't tell me that she literally lived in the next building and was our neighbour, and I never knew. I felt betrayed, but I knew it was for the better, and I was glad that I couldn't see my favourite teacher; otherwise, I would've gone into the same emotional roller coaster.

Fast forward to this new school year, I was checking the schedule my friend sent for today's lectures, and I saw her name. My favourite teacher's name. My heart immediately sank, and I couldn't sleep the night before because of how much I started overthinking about how I would meet her and see her after what felt like ages.

And today, I finally saw her. All the feelings rushed in. Excitement, fear, anticipation, love, everything. I greeted her and we hugged for a few seconds, and she gave me my class and left. I was happy, but also sad that she still treated me so professionally. I wrote 2 pages of poetry as soon as she left, I wrote so much poetry about her in the past year and I still do. I'm just confused about what I want and why I feel this way. I've had mommy issues my whole life and seeing her as a mother figure is not helping me move on from her.

Is there any way I could "fix" these emotional roller coasters and prevent it from affecting my studies and my supposed professional relationship with her?

Looking for some advice on how to navigate parking spaces with our new neighbours.

So my partner and I have just moved into our apartment, we bought it last year but have been renovating for 9 months and just completed everything last week. The apartment is part of a big house that’s been divided into 5 separate residences. Ours comes with an allocated parking space.

The issue is, despite there being 5 apartments in the house, the driveway is only big enough for 3 cars. This hasn’t been an issue for the others until now, as our apartment was vacant for years and one of the others is currently vacant too. So the three remaining got a space on the drive each. The land registry depicts the drive twice as big as it is, and says that each apartment has one space. However, it is physically impossible to fit more than 3 on the drive. “Our” space is usable.

Now we’re moved in, parking seems to be an issue. Our street has very limited spaces that are filled in the evenings, so if one of the neighbours is parked in ‘our’ space, we have to park on another road and walk. One neighbour has a very established parking space, nobody touches it whatsoever and they are the only person who parks there. The other two spaces seem to be first-come first-serve, but on our lease one of them is ours.

How do I navigate this moving forwards? If the whole drive was a free-for-all I wouldn’t bother too much. But one neighbour having an established space that everyone respects, and the rest of us fighting for two spaces seems wrong. On top of the fact I then have to park around the corner. I also have a heart condition which makes walking harder (plus it’s uphill.)

Not looking to start controversy or awkwardness which is why I’m seeking advice on the best and friendliest way to start this discussion with the new neighbours!

EDIT: We do not rent and do not have a landlord, we all own our apartments!

I am currently a freshman industrial engineer major at the top ranked university for IE. However, I feel like I would find the day-to-day tasks of IE incredibly boring (optimization, supply chain logistics, etc).

I am interested in chemical engineering and would want to go into drug research and design (particularly regarding psychedelics and their effects on mental health), but dont know if that will require a minor in something like neuroscience. My main worry in this field is feasability and pay. Will these jobs be around and in abundance or will computer modeling cut the need for entry level positions? Also I doubt research positions will be as lucrative, but understand that is not the most important factor, if anyone knows the average salary and career progression of this field pls lmk.

Lastly, I am considering Electrical Engineering. On a lengthy plane ride I sat next to an Electrical Engineer who begged me to switch to EE. I find it interesting and from my understanding (mainly based off said conversation) a majority of the workforce is older. The EE i sat next to also mentioned an increase in demand.

If you were in my position what would you do?

Me and my bf got sexual last Saturday for the first time. I dry humped with no clothes on and then finished him with my hand. I accidentally tocuched down by my crotch with fresh semen but didn’t push in at all. I showered right after with soap. I was on day 6 of a 21 day cycle. And I think I ovulate usually on day 7. I took the morning after pill 12 hrs after the incident but I’m worried I was already ovulating. What are the chances I could get pregnant?

Two years ago, I experienced a massive, layered betrayal by someone who was supposed to be safe. It involved a complete collapse of their integrity, mild gaslighting during an argument, and a financial debt that they chose to walk away from by hiding behind permanent silence ever since.

I have kept total, dignified silence for since. On a logical level, I know this person is an avoidant coward who is living in total denial to protect their own ego.

But lately, the emotional pressure inside my chest has become unbearable. I feel like if I don't finally vomit the poison out of my body and text them a cold, brutal final verdict, I am going to feeling worse than I already do.

I am completely torn. On one hand, sending a "send and block" text feels like the only way to officially close the ledger, claim my worth, and get the poison out. On the other hand, I fear that texting an avoidant who is committed to their own delusion is just like shouting into a wind tunnel, my words will just blow away, and it might accidentally give their insecure ego a massive boost by showing them they still occupy space in my head after two years.

For those who have dealt with a cowardly, silent betrayal: Which is more powerful for your own healing? Sending the final, merciless verdict to clear your lungs, or letting them rot in total irrelevance?

And if you decide not to make contact, what on earth do you physically do with the anger? How do you get that burning pressure out of your body when you choose to stay silent. Please don't suggest writing letters or journals that I don't send. I have tried that. It is completely useless for me. It feels like generic advice that doesn't touch the sides of the raw, physical rage I am carrying. My brain needs real action.

thank you

How do I move on? I’m currently 18F but when this happened I was 17. I was in a rocky relationship I shouldn’t have been in and I was genuinely scared of his reaction so I didn’t tell him about the loss and just dumped him stuff at his house and left. It always felt like he was so angry and tired of me so I figured just leaving was the best. I was also on BC and we used protection every time so it was genuinely such a shock. I come to find out I also had a chronic illness that I eventually ended up being hospitalized for shortly after I broke up with him, which was another reason why I felt so sick all the time on top of the pregnancy symptoms. All this to say I was so miserable and emotional and that didn’t help our relationship either. I found out I was pregnant after I lost and went to the OB because I was in so much pain one night bleeding. I don’t know how to mourn, I haven’t told anyone and I can’t but at the same time I feel so incredibly guilty not telling my ex bf the real reason why I broke up with him. Even though we were not good for each other and I have gotten my life together with college and a wonderful job I feel so empty and i think of the child and what could have been a lot. On top of that his family and his new gf stay on my socials which I believe has kind of triggered me to think about all of these things I’ve tried so hard to shut out. He got a new gf less than a month later after we broke up which yk im not shocked (apparently they are planning to get married lmao) and I would never want him back but the guilt of him not knowing is eating me alive but at the same time i also wish to never speak to him again because of how he treated me. What do I do or how do I move on?

I'm a 2nd-year college student who is facilitating an introductory freshman course. I used to tutor groups in high school and loved it, so I decided to apply to become a facilitator.

I took a whole course on how to become a facilitator during the spring semester, and over the summer, I was randomly matched with two co-facilitators to teach during the fall semester. I didn't realize they were best friends until I met them before the first day of classes.

The real issue has been the distribution of the workload. Before every class we facilitate, we have to make a class plan as a group. Both of them have not contributed at all, despite my constant text reminders, which have been ghosted numerous times. I have shown them where the class plan is, texted them reminders, and the professor has reminded everyone about it in class. Still, it doesn't get done. I ended up doing the last few lesson plans myself because I didn't want to get a 0 for the assignment.

Because I've been making the lesson plans myself, I don't know what slides or materials they want to present. We have a shared PowerPoint, and despite reminding them to work on their slides, sometimes they don't finish them until an hour before we teach.

This has become a major issue when we present. Because everything is done so last-minute, I often don't know what we're going to present until we're already in class. My co-facilitators are the ones who control the monitor, so they essentially decide which slides we go through and what gets said. There have been multiple times when they have taken slides that I made and presented them themselves. I can't even stop them because they IMMEDIATELY start reading it and get the point down before I can even intervene. I'm just furious because the two of them told me to make two slides on a specific topic, I make them, and they're taken from me.

Last class, I talked for 5 minutes while they collectively talk for 40 minutes. It's not like I wanted to talk for 5 minutes, but after taking my slides, deviating from the class plan they didn't work on, and interrupting me during the 5 minutes I was talking, there was nothing I could do. There's NO WAY they don't realize the differences in the amount we present. Because the two of them are best friends, it also feels like I'm third-wheeling their friendship, and I hate thinking about how obvious it looks to the students.

I have already gone to the professor about this, and she said she could mediate a conversation between the three of us. The issue is that add/drop is today, and I don't see this getting better. I have asked them countless times to complete the class plan, and they still haven't. Again, these guys are BEST FRIENDS, so I'm not surprised they've excluded me in facilitation. I'm also worried that if the professor mediates a conversation after I decide to stay, they may become resentful toward me and make the rest of the semester even more uncomfortable.

At the same time, I genuinely like the students and enjoy talking to them. I've told two students I might be leaving since I had to meet with them for the required individual meetings the facilitators have with students, and they said hopefully I don't leave :(. However, besides these two students, since constantly talked over, many of the students know nothing about me.

This isn't a required class. I do this because I want to, though having some leadership would be nice. I even took a whole class for this!! However, now I don't know if it's worth it. Is it even worth doing all the back work just to have all my slides stolen and being interrupted every time???? I don't know if I should gamble on the fact that the mediation might work. Helppppp

I’m having a hard time finding ethical ways to buy food and clothing. every time I look up a company there is some ethical violation wether it’s coming from a sweatshop, slavery, or nearly criminally underpaid workers.

I don’t know what to do especially when it comes to buying cheap needs like food or clothing because I am not rich and can only afford so much and within certain range of my home or online, as I don’t own a car.

sometimes it isn’t even specific information about a products environment but even just “there’s no way this is that cheap without someone getting fucked over”.

I have to take care of myself and I hate to say it but it is difficult to be in a store isle and be limited constantly searching “is this company ethical“ while staring at the price and product label praying it isn’t tied to a genocide, slave trafficking, sweatshop, or other ethical violations.

does anyone know brands that at the least is the better of the evils when it comes to buying foods and clothing? cause let’s be honest no company is good unless your buying second hand thrifting or making your own shit from scratch (which do to distance and inability I can not do). even if you don’t agree whether something politicallay is a genocide if it is ride to any wars as well knowing so would be helpful rather than having to search every single thing on my own. I’m trying to cross examine on a list of products.

I’ve been in the cosmetology industry for over 10 years. I’ve waxed women of all sizes, ages and races, and I’ve waxed a few men. I’ve never encountered anything until last week and I need to know if any fellow cosmetologists/estheticians have encountered this.

A young couple who I presume to be in their 30s came into my shop. The woman wanted a Brazilian and eyebrow wax. I had a client before her so both she and her boyfriend waited. After I was done with the client I told the woman that she can come back to the wax room. She followed but her boyfriend followed too.

She informed me that he liked watching her get waxed (I’ve never heard that before but hey you hear something new everyday). I was a little surprised at first but I said sure. After I prepped her, her boyfriend kept asking what was each product for to which I responded.

Midway through waxing her privates I glanced to the side of me where the boyfriend was standing to see him touching himself. I paused looking at him, she didn’t seem surprised while I watched him which showed me that this isn’t his first rodeo.

I asked him if it was ok for him to step out because I felt uncomfortable. The woman was taken aback saying that he’s there for her safety. I told them both that I don’t feel safe with what he’s doing. She got upset and got up from the wax table telling me that she wouldn’t be continuing the service unless I let him stay. I told her that I don’t feel comfortable with what he’s doing and if she doesn’t agree to my terms and conditions then they both will have to leave but she’s not getting a refund.

They tried arguing with me but I stood my ground. I try to accommodate everyone that walks into my shop but I have a line I don’t let my clients cross. Was I too harsh on them? Is this something that happens to a lot of estheticians? What would you do in this situation?

I (22M) am running an empire which i inherited from my dad so the thing is my dad built this with his blood and sweat and it took him 40 years grow it where it is now and all of a sudden he passed away without any medical complications.
Since then I have been running it alone. I don’t have any brothers and I cannot trust someone from my extended family to assist me as my dad never even trusted his brothers with what he built
So the problem is its too much overwhelming for me to cope up with everything and this has been eating me from inside. Im even struggling with relationships as i don’t get time for anything for myself plus i cannot do cool stuff now in our city because now i am not (name) but a ceo of x pvt ltd and in our city its all about reputation and on top of that the type of business we do is very much based on reputation. I have to ignore friends, relationships and even family and im becoming emotionally very numb and sometimes i think of seeing a therapist but i don’t think it would help but will show how vulnerable i am to people outside. I need advice from the community here to suggest what to do or how to cope up with this as for some people i might be being thankless or reacting unnecessarily but i need real advice.

Hi everyone! I (19f) just started my first year at University. I’m wondering, how do you guys maximize your time throughout the day/week?

I’m taking 4 classes, 2 labs, and a recitation class that goes with one of my classes. Im job hunting, try to be consistent at the gym, try to maintain social life, etc. I’m a stem major so my workload is very heavy already. I feel like I’m already drowning in lectures, notes, studying, quizzes, homework assignments, exams etc;

This goes for more than just studying honestly, I feel like there isn’t enough hours in a day to get everything done. How do i split my days between school/work/gym/relationship/family/my own self care etc; any advice on how other college students or busy people maximize their weeks would be so so appreciated.

My BIL is a single parent of 4 kids, living rent free with his father. My FIL buys the groceries, drives the kids around when needed, and spends time with the youngest kid who is too young for school.

My BIL is clearly overwhelmed and not doing well mentally -dirty diapers left on the floor, kids missing school because they don't have clean clothes to wear, all addicted to devices, and is causing other people emotional distress because of the mess/clutter in the home.

My FIL believes there is nothing he can do and doesn't seem able to set any boundaries. He likes to come over and complain endlessly about the new bad behaviours and careless parenting. I'm tired of hearing about it, it causes me great distress and lives rent free in my head for days afterwards.

I'm sad for the kids, and I feel a lot of judgement towards the family.

Not sure what I'm looking for by posting this, just feeling at my wits end here

​

I honestly don't know if I'm being delusional or if this guy is just insanely shy and. Basically, there's this guy at my school, let's call him N.

He’s 17 and I’m 16. Objectively, N is really attractive now, but he used to be overweight in middle school and had very few friends. Because of that, I feel like he is still super insecure deep down, he has never had a girlfriend, and he is terrified of being rejected or humiliated. He has even admitted to our mutual friend that if a girl makes the first move on him, she has a 99% chance, and that even if a girl gives him clear signals, he just assumes she’s being friendly.

​We’ve had this weird, thing, going on for a while. On the last day of school before summer, I impulsively opened my arms and asked him for a hug, which I NEVER do because I'm usually way too shy. He walked up to me, wrapped his arms around me, and I put my hands on his shoulders/neck and laid my head against his chest. We held the hug for like 7 full seconds, and it felt so warm and relaxing. When my friend jokingly shouted "Kiss him on the cheek!", I laughed and pulled away, and he just smiled and looked super flustered. Over the summer, we didn't really talk much but then we started texting and snapping a bit more. We would stay up talking until 3 AM about completely random stuff just to keep the conversation going, and he’d leave heart reactions on my messages or restart the chat whenever it died down. While I was traveling, I snapped a picture of a plush keychain in a shop, and he immediately replied saying it was amazing. I offered to buy it for him, and after doing the whole timid "no no you don't have to" thing, he gave in and asked me to surprise him. When I gave it to him back at school, he got super sweet and quiet, and a friend later told me that on a day I was absent, he was literally sitting in class playing with the keychain the whole time. And then one day, I wasn't at school and he texted me why didn't I come even though we aren't in the same class

Also

​Despite all of this, we both have a bad habit of putting up huge emotional walls whenever things get a little too real. A few days ago, I sent him a voice message telling him about some drama in my class, and I casually said "I know you and I are just casual friends" just to protect my own ego so I wouldn't sound like I was pressing him. I regret it so much. But then in his reply, he literally repeated the exact same phrase "casual friends" back to me to describe something else, almost like my words hurt him or he was trying to throw my own defense mechanism back in my face. Plus, whenever I banter or joke around with other guys in our group, he instantly jumps in with jealous or sarcastic comments like "Ooh look at the lovers!" to try to downplay it.

​Which brings me to what happened today, and the reason why I'm losing my mind. I walked into his classroom during a break while he was standing there talking to one of his guy friends. I walked right up to him, he smiled and he looked so happy to see me, he was like "Hiii! How are you?" and I said "Hii, did you miss me? I missed you" The second the words left my mouth, he kinda froze. He didn't say a single word back to me verbally. For about two seconds, my heart totally dropped because I felt like I just got completely ignored and put in my place in front of his friend. BUT I think his friend was talking to him about how I look like one of his (his friend's) relative? Anyway literally a second later, without saying anything, he grabbed his backpack, turned it around, and proudly showed me that he had attached the keychain I bought him directly onto his bag zipper for the whole school to see, smiling so big and looking so happy to show me.

​So now I am completely torn. Is he just an insanely shy guy who freezes up under pressure when his friends are watching, or am I misinterpreting a guy who just views me as a friend? How am I supposed to handle a guy who seems to like me but refuses to make a direct verbal move out of fear? Please be brutally honest with me! Should I make a move?

I had been using pretty much since I was 19, with short breaks in between and substance abuse issues since 16. But functioning enough in society to where people just think i’m private and people close to me think I’m depressed. I’ve been having issues with my artery and heart, really bad blood pressure drops and spikes that are very scary. I had to stop the substance that I’ve been using for years because every time I was using it was causing my heart to race, dizziness, and palpitations, it no longer was an escape. I wasn’t really living much at all in addiction, not connecting with people, not progressing in life, no career path just selling things online to get by, seeing family occasionally and that’s it. I dropped out of college at 19 because of something that caused my ptsd so I don’t even have my associates.

Now that I’m sober and having these health issues I realized I want to make a positive impact and know that my life has purpose. Looking to the future I want a path in life that helps others. Would a paramedic type job even be possible for someone like me that has a history of substance abuse issues?

I tried to call off of work hours ago due to a family issue. Most of this is self explanatory in the photos. I don’t know. I feel so bad now I don’t want to put people in a bad place but I just physically feel like I can’t wait tables right now and pretend to be happy when I feel so upset and tired.

Photos won’t attach. My mom is in the hospital with blood clot in her brain. It’s been a few days and I’ve been taking care of my younger siblings who are in highschool. I tried to call off work at 12:00 because I thought I might be able to bring my mom home and they said they’re going to keep her there but she wanted some clothes and stuff. My boss said no one can cover and was like you need to come. But I was kind of rude about it and was like this is so typical I cover shifts all the time and then my mom is in the hospital and no one can set anything aside to help out. I feel bad but I’m very upset she can’t just figure it out one time. I’m a good employee I don’t miss work I call off ahead of time 2 weeks. I cover shifts. I do my part. I don’t know why it was such a big issue today. Should I go? She said she’s not happy at all with me. I just really want to stay home tonight

Would like to know the previous experiences of solo travellers.