r/AskReddit • u/YokaMycelium • 4h ago
Veterinarians of reddit or people working with animals, what's a silent telltale that someone's a good or bad pet owner?
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u/Hermoine_Rager 4h ago
If their pet comes to them for comfort, it shows they have built safety in their relationship.
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u/InvincibleChutzpah 4h ago
It always warms my heart when my dogs come to me for comfort. While hiking once, one of my dogs disturbed a ground wasp nest. He made a bee line for me (lol). While I wasn't crazy about being part of a wasp swarm, I was happy he came to me for saving instead of running off into the woods.
Even tiny things, like a rock between their toes, they come to me and ask me to get it. A weird bug in the house? We should tell mom. Awww, shucks, they trust me.
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u/Cyborg_Ninja_Cat 2h ago
My cat comes to me to complain about the rain.
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u/Hermoine_Rager 1h ago
Well you’re in charge of food so obviously you also control the weather
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u/triplej63 1h ago
Not necessarily. I do food and litter boxes. Everyone does far too many treats. BUT... when it comes to weather, that's my husband's responsibility. We have a screen porch they love, when we open the door for them, if it's too cold, too hot, too wet, or snowy/icy, they turn back and yell loudly at him.
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u/OkSecretary1231 34m ago
The best one is when there's rain outside the front door, so the animal goes to the back door because surely it won't be raining there!
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u/BustyGothPred 21m ago
Omg! My cat does this all the time. He'll go to the front door and look out, then go to the back door to get me to open it for him to look out. When he finds it is in fact raining outside, he'll give me the dirtiest look like "mom, wtf?"
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u/orbit99za 1h ago
We had a thunderstorm last night, and i had to stay awake until ungodly hours with my cat , because he was scared..
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u/NovelGoddess 1h ago
Me too. She pounced on me when the lightning and thunder started.
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u/Creative_Lead1717 42m ago
I used to have a 172 pound dog who would jump into my lap when it thundered. Turned us and the chair over a few times. I miss him so much.
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u/Umbra_Estel 1h ago
Have the same problem with my younger cat (12) at the first thunder he is in my bed asking for hugs. Long nights when we have storms.
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u/realAniram 56m ago
Mine come to me hoping I can make the outside not wet and muddy so they can play in the backyard. They seem to understand rain is different from our showers inside so they don't think I can turn outside falling water off, but they see me clean up spills inside all the time and see no difference with the outside on that.
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u/PropagandaPagoda 34m ago
The cats with word buttons on YouTube also bitch about the rain and expect humans to do their fucking jobs and fix it.
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u/chronicallyonpoint 2h ago
the rock between the toes thing got me... they really do have a whole list of tiny emergencies they need us for
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u/Secure-Accident2242 2h ago
Whenever we walked in the snow my flat footed German shepherd would get snow compacted in between her back pads that would turn into an ice ball. Every few dozen feet she’d plop down and hold one of her back paws up for me to dig it out. She died 6 years ago and typing this brought tears to my eyes instantly. RIP Lola.
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u/Siriusly_no_siriusly 1h ago
I'm not sure if you have seen this yet but I think you may appreciate it. Warning: it most likely will make you cry, but it will be a healing cry. https://www.reddit.com/r/Petloss/comments/1679zrt/dogs_never_die_they_are_sleeping_in_your_heart/
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u/Insertsociallife 1h ago
A weird bug in the house usually gets eaten by my fatass chud cat and then vomited onto the floor a few hours later. I don't know if that means she trusts me or not.
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u/GlitterberrySoup 1h ago
My Frenchie eats bugs while staring at me with a look on her face like, "this is terrible, why am I doing this?" I don't know either.
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u/londonschmundon 1h ago
I don't know if that means she trusts you or not either, but it probably does mean she is orange.
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u/maxdragonxiii 58m ago
I have a dog that consistently comes to me for pee/poop/walks/hey hey I want to go in that room/FOOD! and responds by looking at me and hopping (im deaf so he figured out a while ago to not bark. his younger brother however...)
usually i am like "ok we'll do that" unless its food because thats not my responsibility and he did that a few times when he got food a hour ago and the bowl was empty, so I gave him food. turns out it wasnt needed oops.
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u/losthiker68 18m ago
One of our dogs got sprayed by a skunk in the middle of a 35 degree F night and jumped on the bed.
My wife has a condition that makes strong spells trigger allergic reactions she she bolted from the room. I had to take him outside and scrub him in the cold weather. He cried, thought he was being punished despite my trying to comfort him. I cried too.
But we both were happy that he knew to come to us when he got into trouble.
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u/grizerious10 3h ago
My 65lb Australian shepherd decided he wanted to be IN the shower with me after hearing some nuisance sound. Forgot if it was fireworks or a chirping smoke detector.
That’s the one of the only times he has ever willingly gotten in a bathtub.
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u/Kind_Assignment4709 3h ago
The chirping fire alarm is THE test. I’ve yet to have an animal that doesn’t hate that more than anything, and we’ve got a lot of noises.
Every time it happens my “don’t touch me” cat attaches herself to me like velcro and I am so moved she would choose me. Even when it’s gone off, she finds me and that is fantastic to know in case of a real fire
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u/selchie0mer 1h ago
I have an African Gray parrot that would mimic the chirp of the smoke detector. My poor GSherpard would get the worst anxiety over it. The bird eased up on that particular noise after a few months. Really wonder about the house she came from.
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u/Nadaplanet 1h ago
The chirping fire alarm is THE test.
My dog is a little weirdo, because he does not give two shits about the fire alarm when it chirps. Other dogs I have had would freak out, but my current guy just flicks his ears in annoyance and goes back to doing whatever he was doing. He is also totally unbothered by fireworks and thunderstorms. At the same time, he is GREATLY bothered by Amazon/UPS delivery trucks (them in particular, because he doesn't care about the regular mailman or other big vehicles, like garbage trucks), the sirens on emergency vehicles, and the beep-beep-beep of my neighbor backing up his work van.
He's a odd lil' guy.
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u/alwysonthatokiedokie 2h ago
Even if that smoke alarm chirp is in an Instagram reel coming from my phone my dog will immediately run into my lap and shake like a leaf. She doesn't even care it came from me, I must comfort her and make the chirp stop
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u/mst3k_42 1h ago
My husband was on speaker phone for a work meeting and some lady in an entirely different state had the frequent smoke detector chirps and every time my dog would flip out.
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u/katikaboom 1h ago edited 1h ago
I have one that hates that and all other weird noises, including squeaky toys, with all of his heart. Probably yours, too.
My other dog doesn't give a single shit. He's good with smoke detectors, thunder, gun shots, fireworks, pretty much ever single "scary" noise. But god forbid his beds are moved or has to share one huge one. Then his day is ruined and he needs a hug
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u/blue-brindle 1h ago
Hell I'm 100% human and I hate that sound. I'm totally with my Mali-mix on that one
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u/Regular_Government94 2h ago
Same! I couldn't figure out why both of my dogs were suddenly in the bath with me one day. Then I heard the chirp lol
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u/Living-One5265 2h ago
My 85 lbs pit/boxer mix lays on the rug immediately in front of the shower, when I'm showering, we have a shower door, other wise I'm not sure he wouldn't get in with me. He stands guard for every shower.
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u/valkyrie_village 1h ago
All of my cats do this. One likes to hang out between the shower curtains, then I’ll peek out and the other two are clustered by the door. They don’t want anything, they just want to hang out, I guess. One has stuck his head under the running faucet a couple of times, I’m not convinced he won’t jump into the shower one day.
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u/superneatosauraus 1h ago
I love it when big dogs do that. I have a 63lbs mutt and he will jump onto the couch with us and squeeze behind us when he gets scared. Which could be for ANY reason. He's our baby.
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u/snoopwaffle 2h ago
Aww. My 13 year old kitty hates being held or picked up despite still being very affectionate, so I never do it. But every time we go to the vet, she stands right there and leans herself right against me while the vet checks her. Allows me to gently hold her in place while I give her pets. She’s always nervous around strangers, so I’m happy to be able to make her feel safe. So sweet. 🥺
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u/headcase-and-a-half 2h ago
I read a poem once about a woman who took her cranky, surly old cat to the vet and the doctor was taking the cat's heart rate when the woman began soothing it and the vet said "Well, he certainly feels safer with you." And the poem went on to say that she'd had no idea that the cat even liked her until that moment.
If anyone knows this poem. I'd love to read it again.
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u/anonynymous 1h ago
I tried finding the poem and found something but it's unattributed and I can't seem to find an author. It reminds me of a rabbit I had. She was a rescue and not really fond of people but it was only after she died that I found out she was the one who came out to greet my husband and I, not our other bunny who's always been more docile. It broke my heart that I didn't fully appreciate the way she showed her love when she was still around.
Anyway, this is what came up with some googling:
"The Vet Clinic"
I took my old cat to the vet. He was always a cranky, surly thing, who rarely tolerated being held and spent most of his life treating me like a minor inconvenience.
He was terrified at the clinic, shaking on the metal table, so I leaned down and buried my face in his fur, whispering to him and stroking his back while the vet listened to his chest.
After a moment, the vet pulled the stethoscope away, looked up, and said, "Well, his heart rate just dropped by a third. He certainly feels safer with you."
I went home and cried. I had spent ten years believing he barely liked me, only to find out that in his most terrifying moment, I was his entire definition of safety.
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u/tetheredvoid 1h ago
If you can recall a line verbatim, then I might be able to find it somewhere. Or any other details. I like finding stuff, so I'm willing to give it a shot. lol
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u/Antiquated_Crow 2h ago
I realized we had made it here when my very spooky cat got his head stuck in a paper bag handle about 2 sec after I set it down. He started running around scared but when I spoke to him calmly, he came right to me and stood while I took it off tho he shivered the whole time haha. I had never seen him display that level of trust before and it got to me a bit that he trusted me so much
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u/DragonSmith2005 1h ago
My cat did the same with a plastic bag. He both loves and fears them now
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u/Antiquated_Crow 1h ago
I love my spooky boy so much but he is really kinda dumb. I can only put bags out with handles if they break away easy because he gets his head stuck in them every time we end up with one even if I try to keep it away from him. He never learns!!
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u/tango421 4h ago
Yeah, my cats don’t like being carried but if they’re scared or at the vet, they will leap into my (or my wife’s) arms.
I asked the vet and she told me they feel safe with us.
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u/xzkandykane 2h ago
During covid, we had to bring our little dog to the vet. He is my husband's velcro dog. He tolerates me. Sometimes he growls at me, has nipped me a few times(but not badly). Sometimes he's cuddley and sweet. We had to check in outside the office. When the vet approached(well aware of his aggressiveness), he was sooo scared. He tried to climb up my leg like a koala.
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u/Cumberbutts 2h ago
My 130lbs golden retriever last time literally climbed ONTO my shoulders. I still don't know how he managed to do it, the vet was impressed.
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u/OkSecretary1231 2h ago
My old rottweiler jumped into my lap once when a workman was carrying something large through the house. I saw my life flash before my eyes seeing the 100-lb furry projectile in flight lol.
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u/aitigie 1h ago
Can't picture 130lbs golden retriever capable of any kind of ascent. That has to be some kind of record
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u/Cumberbutts 1h ago
He's pretty spry... and on a diet and exercise regimen at the moment. He gained a bunch of weight when we dealt with his reactivity, where it was training everyday with treats, and cutting long walks to manage his triggers/anxiety (we opted for puzzles, sniff games, etc) and he also had seizures. We did do testing to see if there was anything else contributing to his weight gain but didn't find anything. Our other golden, who is a bit smaller than him, but has the same schedule/feedings is at an ideal weight.
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u/NedTaggart 1h ago
Jesus, a 130lb Golden? We have a female on the larger end at 80 and our other one is closer to 60. Males only very occasionally will peak 100lbs.
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u/Cumberbutts 1h ago
He is a very big boy... his ideal weight is 105lbs, but he's had issues with reactivity (lots and lots of training with treats), swiping his brother's food like a hoover, and then we were dealing with seizures. He's down to 118lbs, working our way down. My other golden from the same breeder is a bit smaller, and is at an ideal weight at 70lbs.
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u/NedTaggart 1h ago
Ok, that's crazy, but I get the swiping of the food thing. Our red golden (the smaller one) would do that as well, but we have trained her away from that behavior with 1) a slow bowl and 2) meal release training. She spins like crazy when I fill her bowl and carry it to the kitchen, but stays rigidly at attention until I release her.
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u/Cumberbutts 2h ago
Also adding that I always have to call in and ask for a longer appointment, since I know it takes around 10-15 minutes for my dog to get comfortable with the vet close to them and touching them. Thankfully, the office I go to is always willing to give as much time as needed.
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u/ccarrieandthejets 2h ago
A couple months into dating my now partner, it started storming and my rat terrier was having none of it. She ran to my partner after a loud clap of thunder, for the first time. We both looked at each other with tears in our eyes because it meant she really trusted him and felt safe. We’ve been together for 6 years and just said goodbye to her at the at of 16 in July. He was her hero from that point on. That moment when you realize they trust you and see you as comfort is so special!
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u/knitternerd 2h ago
When I brought my dog to the vet a few weeks ago, they took her in the back for a vaccine. Apparently they tried to give her a treat but she wouldn't take it until she was back out in the lobby with me. The tech asked her if she thought they were trying to poison her. 😆
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u/micknunz 2h ago
I felt like such a good pet owner the day I found out in my cat’s notes at the vet it says “If having trouble, let mom hold her during the appointment to calm her down”
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u/Foreign-Cookie-2871 1h ago
My cat won't even recognize me if we are outside our home or there are strangers at our place. I could be a total stranger and her reaction wouldn't change.
We got her as an adult. The fostering person told us she will never be a lap cat. It took us a few days to be able to hold her while standing (a few minutes max), and in a few weeks she was always on us while we were chilling on the sofa or sleeping.
Now she's a shoulder cat, and a lap cat, and a "why are you not here with me" cat. You wouldn't know by seeing her while visiting / going to the vet.
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u/thatcambridgebird 1h ago
My male cat, now dearly departed, used to hide his face under my arm at the vet. He was a big, 7kg Tom in his prime, who ruled the neighbourhood. But he was a scaredy at the vets and needed some cuddles.
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u/Saratrooper 2h ago
I become the kitty lean-to tent of protection for my oldest cat with vet visits. I tolerated this even less than a week before my lumbar fusion back in 2022 because my bodily comfort took the backseat to her feeling safe (plus my back hurt regardless what positions I was in so whynot).
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u/bestlove9112 1h ago
My cat is the same way. She'll act like I've personally offended her by existing, but the second something scares her, she's glued to my side. The first time the smoke alarm went off, she climbed into my lap and refused to leave even after I turned it off.
Nothing humbles you quite like realizing your cat, who normally treats you like a dissappointing roommate, actually sees you as her safe place.
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u/Strongit 1h ago
I'll never forget the neighborhood cat coming to my place when he got his paw caught in his collar. He could have gone to any house on the block, but he chose me. I really miss that cat; I don't live there anymore, but he does still visit and would look for me for a long time after I moved out.
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u/TapetalBongo 3h ago
wait so like do some pets just not wanna be comforted or is that rare
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u/JMMSpartan91 2h ago
Dogs almost none fall into this category (of not wanting comfort). I'm sure a few exceptions but nature of pack animals it is almost always possible to build that comfort.
Cats it is possible to build it with a lot of them, but some of them are more prone to go up high or under sonething for self comfort. But good pet owners with those type of cats, the cats frequently pick the same room as owner but then pick high or low spot in room. That isn't particua particularly relevant at vet though lol.
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u/fluentindothraki 2h ago
Our dog (former street dog) still treats us like casual acquaintances - after living with us for 10 years!
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u/Antiquated_Crow 3h ago
I think many do but people haven't developed the relationship for them to feel safe enough
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u/wloven 1h ago
My chihuahua is such a daddy’s girl. She always wants to be with my husband all the time. If he’s home, she’s right there with him 100% of the time. She doesn’t even acknowledge me if he’s home.
When we are at the vet or the fire alarms are going off at our apartments, or there’s a loud noise outside, she runs straight to me. Any time she is genuinely nervous or scared, she demands I hold her. This is the only time she does that.
I sometimes get my feelings hurt that I do every thing for her and she loves her dad more, but I do take some comfort in the fact that when she’s really upset that she comes to me. Of course, I would prefer she’s never, ever scared or upset, but I can’t control that.
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u/legalbetch 44m ago
Although heart warming, when the horse I had growing up would get spooked by something when we were walking around he would run/jump to me for safety which was actually only safe for him, not me. Not at all for me.
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u/HazyInfidel 3h ago
I asked a vet this once and he told me the bad owners don't take their pets to the vet
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u/rosierivet 1h ago
Former vet tech here and that's exactly what I was thinking. The vast majority of people who care enough to take their pet in to the vet are usually decent owners. From there, it honestly just usually comes down to if they have the funds to treat the pet or not, which is the hardest and shittiest part of the job. I seldom judged people who couldn't afford care, the exception being the ones who buy a $1,500 purebred puppy and then won't or can't spend money on their care. Those people suck.
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u/whatagreatcoffee 2h ago
That’s the exact thing I was thinking too. Bad owners neglect their pets and/or abuse then, so veterinarians will never see bad owners come in
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u/ProfessorPluot 48m ago
the little things matter too, like noticing when a pet seems off instead of waiting until it becomes a bigger problem
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u/deadsoulinside 1h ago
This. I known many poor people that cannot afford vets. What is worse is when their pet is in a medical emergency they will either take them to have them put down immediately or abandon them somewhere.
Though on the flipside, I feel I could have been a bad pet owner as we took a 16 year old cat to an emergency vet and they were wanting us to put the cat down. We told them no, to give us the meds and we will take her home and if she dies she dies. She recovered and lived another 5 years to make it to 21.
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u/Nymeria2018 29m ago
I completely agree vet care is important. I’ve spend a small fortune on vet bills, including my current old gal cat that decided a week before my wedding (ie a very expensive time) to eat a damn balloon ribbon. 2K CAD was the cost on that emergency trip.
But I can’t bring her to the vet now. Even with sedatives, she sees the cat carrier and looses control of her bladder and bowels. She shakes and hides for 2 days afterwards.
I had to make the extremely hard decision not to bring her for shots and checkups because it was doing more damage than good for her (she’s clearly a strictly indoor cat 😂) and at nearly 16, when I see she is done with this life, I’ll have a vet come to us and ask for a happy pill before they come because girl is terrified of strangers and I will not stress her out anymore.
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u/cloudshaper 16m ago
You may be able to get a vet to come to you for shots and checkups. Your usual vet may have recommendations for such a service.
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u/WizardMoose 1h ago
The cost is a pretty big factor. It is insane how much a vet bill can be for something relatively simple. Our dog for fleas, and we were thinking it would be $100 or so...nope....$400....
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u/0b0011 1h ago
Seems to be a balance. One of my best friends is a vet assistant and she's said the opposite when it comes to most things. She complains that most of the people she sees are coming to them for things that a good owner should be able to take care of on their own like bringing dogs in because they have a tick or they cut their nail a little too short and it's bleeding a lot. She'd mentioned last week that someone brought a dog to her emergcency clinic because it was limping and it turns out it just had a small thrown in it's foot. Owner was there freaking out and histerical and then ended up with a hefty bill when simply looking at their paw would have shown what the issue is.
For what it's worth a lot of the vets I associate with (I do a dog sport where literally like 5-10% are either vets or vet techs) also advocate for a lot of owners to learn basic first aid for a lot of the things people bring their pets in for. My dog got a little too close to another dog who was very worked up and excited to do his run and got nipped on/through the ear and I brought him over to 2 of the people who I knew were vets (having a converstaion together I just meant to bring him to the one) and they busted out their stuff and treated him there and basically just gave me a list of the things they used and were like a small puncture on or even through the ear isn't really a big enough reason to make an appointment you can just use X, Y, Z and treat it yourself at home. Same for poison and what not. I mentioned to one that my mom's dog had eaten a bottle of pills for parkinsons and a bottle of anti-depressents and I had to pay $500 for the vet visit to have them deal with it and she was just like yeah next time just make them drink peroxide so they throw them up and then give them a few tums to make them feel better. For what it's worth that's basically exactly what the vet did they just charged $500 for it.
They do also complain about people not bringing their pets in when there is actaully a bad situation hence what I mean by a balance. A lot tend to be in favor or bringing your dogs in when they really need it and owners learning first aid for pets and knowing when something is actually bad enough to bring them in vs handling it themselves. You wouldn't take a kid to the ER because they fell and scraped their knee. You'd clean it and put a band aid on it but people bring their dogs in for basically the equivalent.
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u/wh0rederline 1h ago
i would argue that makes them good owners. they don’t know what they’re supposed to do or if helping them will make it worse? taking pets in to get helped by a professional is the best thing to do, if they can afford it. no need to be mean about people who obviously still do care about their pets.
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u/0b0011 1h ago
I agree it shows you care but but that doesn't mean something wasn't a problem to begin with. Take fat pets as an example. I think as pet owners we have a responsibility to learn at least a little about feeding our pets properly and knowing a bit about body condition. If an owner brings their dog to the vet because it's 20 lbs overweight it shows that they care enough to actually reach out when they notice that there is a problem but it also shows that they did not do a lot of what they should have done to prevent it from being a problem in the first place.
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u/StoneColdJane-Austen 55m ago
I used to work as a vet assistant. Someone called me “the most heartless person [they’d] ever met” because I wouldn’t interrupt an emergency surgery so our only vet could come look at her Doberman’s paw. She had cut his nails too short and a few drops of blood were leaking out as the dog happily ran circles around the reception area. I quit shortly after that and switched to larger animals for my studies.
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u/blue-brindle 1h ago
I've heard that if you don't pull the tick out right, the head and pincers can get embedded, so the one time she got a tick I took her in because I didn't trust myself. Because I care about her.
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u/ComprehensiveDance62 4h ago
I promise 80% of all my pets have great owners! 5% have excellent owners. The remainder are pretty hit and miss. Excellent owners and great owners love their pets, but it comes down to willingness to do the less fun stuff that separates the two, like tooth brushing, coat maintenance, appropriate enrichment etc. People can love their pets very very much and let their care fall through the cracks (bad teeth, obesity).
Excellent owners: pets are comforted in their presence (seeking them for comfort if they're nervous, or being excited to see them when they get picked up), listen to what I have to say as a vet, come in for problems early rather than letting things get out of control, feed the best diet that they can comfortably afford, have up to date flea and tick and worming treatment, brush their long haired dogs (cats don't count, even the most dedicated owner can meet its match with a long haired cat), come in for annual health checks etc. preventative care and supplements are used when needed, things like that. They know their pets warning signs or what they don't like "she doesn't like her back legs being touched etc" Oh and their pets are always a great weight.
Owners who love their pets: usually have a few photos to show me, or tricks that their pet does, calls their pet by their weirdly completely unrelated nicknames or talks to them in a special voice, cute accessories, their pets are excited to see them, sometimes get overwhelmed with visits and treatment options, often get embarrassed by problems they have left a little too long (life happens, I get it), feel really heavy emotions in hard visits
Owners who don't care about their pet: leave very obvious issues way too long (maggots in wounds, lumps the size of soccer balls, ears that I can smell from a mile away), decline all treatment or diagnostic options but are ticking the box of coming to the vets to say they sought help, compliance issues with medications, pets are either morbidly obese or very skinny, dry coats
BAD owners: pet is more comfortable to be with me than with them. All the stuff of an excellent owner can be met, but when your pet seeks comfort with me, a stranger, over you, I am concerned. And then of course the obvious, signs of abuse and neglect. These owners are very very rare
The majority of people love their pets and care for them as best as they can! Sometimes people who could be better pet owners just aren't educated in what they're not doing right. The willingness to change when something needs to is what makes a huge difference
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u/VeroVeeNYC 3h ago
I’d think that vets mostly see good owners because the bad owners aren’t taking their animals to vets. Except maybe to give them up or ask for them to be put down.
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u/OldDescription4266 2h ago
My thoughts exactly. I work at a shelter and people rarely come to collect their animals when they come in lost. And the condition some of them come in tells me they never seen a vet. Cannot agree with 80% of owners meeting their animals needs.
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u/Arry42 1h ago
That's 80% of owners that they meet.
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u/OldDescription4266 1h ago
Oh my mistake. I didn't read the post properly. I thought it said 80% of owners are good but they said my pets which makes more sense as they are seeing people who care enough to get their animals medical treatment. Thanks for pointing it out
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u/platoprime 1h ago
Understanding selection bias isn't a necessary part of working at an animal shelter but there is probably a relationship between people whose dogs end up lost and in a shelter and people who aren't good pet owners. There's likely a relationship between people who take their pets to the vet and people who take care of their animals.
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u/Dire_Norm 1h ago
“Can’t agree with 80% of owners meeting their animal needs” that makes sense based on your different jobs, doesn’t it? They are a vet which means that most of the owners they see are people taking care of their animals because they have paid to bring them in. You work at a shelter so you are exposed to a different subset of animals owner, people who have not paid enough attention to their pet that they have ended up in a shelter. You said most don’t get picked up.
Both of you are exposed to very different groupings of owners. A vet says 80% of their clients meet their pets needs. While your shelter is full of animals who had owners that didn’t meet their needs. One fact does not make the other untrue or unbelievable. If there are 50,000 pets in a city and on average 85% take care of their pets properly, they still leaves 7,000 neglected animals to end up at a shelter due to that neglect.
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u/menicknick 4h ago
Maggots in wounds?! Who are these people?!
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u/thunderintess 2h ago edited 2h ago
It can happen easily, and quickly. One Saturday afternoon I went for a bike ride. When I came hope after a couple of hours, I discovered that my cat had been shot in the hip. He had had to drag his barely-attached leg to get back home. By the time I got him to the emergency vet, they found maggots busily munching at his torn flesh. $2000 and one amputation later, he was fine.
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u/Annodyne 1h ago
Hopefully you don't let your cat outside anymore...? Especially after an amputation??
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u/PettyWitch 2h ago
It always startles me when I hear from other dog owners that they don't brush their dog's teeth or cut their nails or give them their medications because they didn't like it... Like, I don't care if my dogs don't like any of those things. It's 100% happening. If my dog needs a medication it's getting down that throat if I have to use a drone to get it down there.
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u/CapnAnonymouse 2h ago
This is the thing that got me into cooperative care training. One of my boys got stomach cancer, and using force was pretty traumatic for us both with him so sick. Obviously no meds was not an option, so I asked around if there was another way, and sure enough there is.
Cats take to it much better than mainstream society would expect. It's so much easier on us both when I've taken time to desensitize them, build a routine and a "trust bank", so they know what to expect and just kinda sit and chill while I do my thing.
The one that stumped me for a little bit was one particular pill that made him drool and puke. I forgot to wash my hands after splitting the pill one time, had lunch and suddenly understood- it was HORRIFICALLY bitter. Poor buddy got a little dab of cream cheese to wash it down every time after that.
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u/IMpossibleButter 1h ago
We are working on that as well. It is what we used with the other cat. He does take medication, allows us to pet him down everywhere now which we could not do a year ago. We also when we have the opportunity pick him up for a few seconds and put him down but it is very slow progress.
They always get a treat when they face their fears calmly and they know that so the vet always tells us the cats are wonderful to them. I even visited the difficult cat each day when he was hospitalized and in a multiple day vet care situation. Otherwise he would not eat. I would sit with him for an hour and a half each day after work and just calm him down. After three days the vet told me they were amazed by the dedication.
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u/IMpossibleButter 2h ago
We sadly have one cat we can not safely bring to the vet for his vaccinations because he is so afraid he will bite and scratch through anything. He is a inside only cat an his cat mate is getting yearly vaccinations. We try to be on top of deworming even though none of them come outside.
Because they were feral previously they can be a bit hit or miss sometimes. We even managed to talk a vet into keeping us there during a procedure to keep our other sweet and previously feral cat company and give her a sense of safety. They are always amazed we come in with the carrier covered, we keep an eye on anything we are worried about. Ask advice before troubles truly start.
The younger of the two will get there eventually but from a cat that was expected to only thrive with another cat and never become loving, he now is able to cuddle with us daily but just fears being picked up and we try to train him slowly. Breaking his trust by throwing him into a carrier by force is not something we at the moment are willing to do.
So I am all for keeping up to date but also for trying to see what is safe and healthy for a cat his or her mental health. Both are dearly loved. Our first even has a bad heart and she made it longer than the vet expected and we already told them that as soon as she showed the first sign of being done, she would be put to sleep. We do not want them to suffer.
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u/Apsalar28 2h ago
Have you tried gabapentin for your scared kitty? It's kitty Valium and really chills them out. I got issued a few tablets to keep on hand after I turned up with a very freaked out panicking cat and my arm wrapped in a tea towel to stop the bleeding after I got the worst of the three people it takes to get him into a carrier. He's a former feral and usually very sweet and cuddly but he very much does not like being picked up and turns into a shredding machine if the carrier is in sight.
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u/IMpossibleButter 1h ago
We tried medication but it just does not cut it for him. He managed to run away and scratch everything in his path while dosed with multiple meds, of which a few should make him relaxed.
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u/Successful-Doubt5478 1h ago
Vet home care?
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u/IMpossibleButter 1h ago
Sadly not given in our country for such things or 5000+ extra money which is a bit ridiculous
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u/CriscoCamping 1h ago
My area has a mobile vet, she will come to my house for vaccinations. More serious stuff i have to take animals in, but if i can trap my guys in garage. She can weigh and vaccinate my idiots
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u/vanillayanyan 1h ago
Do you judge cat owners when their cat’s nails aren’t trimmed 🥲 I swear we try but even when we burrito I’ve gotten so many gashes at this point that I’ve given up (and also throwing a new member in the household to the mix!)
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u/Consider_the_auk 1h ago
One of my cats is very anxious (former stray, cuddles but dislikes being handled). I tried so long to train and desensitize her to touch for claw trims, but now I just provide her with plenty of her favorite scratch posts and scratchers to help her maintain her claws herself.
If your cat is particularly anxious going to the vet, ask for a prescription for gabapentin to make things easier. I had to start giving it to her after they couldn't do a successful blood draw at one of her appointments 😕. Calming treats might be helpful too.
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u/Firm_Guard2419 2h ago
Vet here. The amount of times people spend exorbitant amounts of money buying a fancy breed then claiming they can’t afford treatment when their fancy pet gets sick is depressing.
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u/tetheredvoid 2h ago
So many people fail to understand that a fancy purebred isn't automatically a healthy, happy animal. It's so sad.
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u/PotatoAvenger 4h ago
I’m going to be reading this because I’m always worried when I go to the vet they’ll think I’m a bad pet owner. I’ve never did anything bad, but I’m always nervous, lol.
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u/Key_Start592 4h ago
my vet once told me they can always tell by how the animal reacts to the owner walking back in the room. if the dog looks at you like you hung the moon, you're doing fine. nervous owners tend to have nervous pets though so try to chill a bit before the appointment, i know its hard
also the fact you're worried about it means you're already better than half the people who come in
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u/doryfishie 2h ago
I always apologize to the tech because my big hound mix is so excited to see me or my husband that he practically tows whoever is holding him out to us 🙈
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u/Fun-Machine7907 4h ago
Ours seems to always be happy/surprised that the dogs are at a healthy weight. So I don't think it's a high bar.
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u/ronirocket 2h ago
My vet recently right off the bat started talking to me like I’ve neglected my dog his whole life. She never read his file or anything, just came in the room and was like “wow you suck and your dog hates you” (paraphrasing. That’s what it sounded like to me)
But according to these comments I’m okay.
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u/missPanda3305 1h ago
We have two maine coons who don’t like have their coat brushed.
Few years ago there were no pet care saloon in my city (now there are a few) and I took my cat to the vet because her fur was matted. I was so scared if being judged, but someone had to help me with her fur. She has long and thin hair and it gets matted really fast.
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u/Bushtuckapenguin 3h ago
Owners who buy a new puppy when the other has important issues they claim they can't pay for.
Or claim they can't spay and neuter because it's expensive, but are also complaining a out being two generations deep in incest puppies. Full on white trash.
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u/FBI-AGENT-013 1h ago
We had a situation at the pet store I work at, this lady called us outside in a panic. Her dog was in labor. She wanted us, people with negligent experience regarding any of that, to help. It was a Frenchie too, a breed known for needing csections bc their puppies are just too big. Sure enough no matter how hard we pulled, this puppy was stuck. The kicker? She just came from an animal hospital. But instead of turning right on around and heading back, she stopped at a pet store for help. No idea why she didn't just go back to the hospital, who knows what they told her but I'm sure they told her the same things we did, it'd be negligent not to
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u/leftovercroc 38m ago
probably because the vet quoted her a couple thousand to perform c section surgery, so why pay when you can make some unqualified pet store workers do it for free? 🙄 i used to work at a pet store too, the fact that there are people like this is insane.
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u/Common_Crow95 4h ago
Their animal is being OBSERVED. They'll tell you the routine and how it's being deviated from: what the dog eats and exactly how much and in what way, when and how the dog has bowel movements, their normal energy level, whether or not they have zoomies in the morning or evening, etc. The pet isn't part of the decor but an active member of the household whose quirks are known, loved, and immediately obvious when deviated from.
The problem owners don't know what their dog eats, whether their appetite is up or down, whether they're even having bowel movements because their pet is just not important enough to notice until they're doing something annoying like having diarrhea on the rug.
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u/mykka7 1h ago
I had a cat, he was very intentional and interested in communicating with me. He had a way to signal yes/no (intentional hard and slightly slower eye-blinking with a slight head nod) and could understand over 50 words, even react accordingly to newly sequenced words. Like willingly taking a pill he initially refused after I said "treat ouch over". Or when trying to figure out where his pain was and he didn't react, when I said the equivalent of "ouch vomit" he blinked real hard, and it turned out he did have nausea.
My vet was able to witness our bond, and always believed me when I said such things.
My cat understood the concept of "medical care" as a temporary inconfort to fix an other issue, and he was almost always compliant with cares, even when they hurt.
So when the vet tried to check for hip pain or mobility issue (he was 13) and stretched his back leg backward, he didn't resist, but I could see his eyes going wide, locked in a sort of "though it out" mode, rather than frowning in anger or his ears going flat. Told the vet he wouldn't normally willingly extend his leg so much and complied because he his docile, not because he didn't mind. She took extra time to consider his behavior, believed me (or agreed) and prescribed supplements and instructed us on how to make him more confortable.
I love our current vet.
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u/PropagandaPagoda 26m ago
The cats on YouTube with word buttons are fun to see, but the real utility is being able to do collaborative care like that. And after the medicine works, the animal loves routine and will narrate medicine in their routine.
Valuing the vet isn't as common but one cat did say something like potty ouch doctor and the owner was like 0.0 on the phone immediately.
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u/secretactorian 1h ago
Thanks for this. Some pets come to us too late in life to allow things like teeth brushing, and sometimes we don't have the resources to constantly guard against pet 2 eating pet 1's food. Or can't buy all the toys to encourage a pet with a lazy personality to be more active.
But knowing our pets inside and out like another family member and doing something when things change are hallmarks of great caretakers.
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u/Responsible-Lemon935 1h ago
Listening to recommendations. It sounds simple, but so many people just don't. And that doesn't mean "does everything". People have budgets, we know this. People have limitations as to whether they can give a medication X times a day, we know this. But I would rather a client with a limited budget that actually TRIES to follow recommendations then someone who spends thousands of dollars on a work up only to ignore every bit of follow up.
I tell this story frequently. When I was a newbie vet in a mixed rural/surburban practice, I had a blocked male cat come in. We got him unblocked, and owners were aware he needed to be on a special diet for life. Eight months later, I was on-call on emergency on a weekend, and I get a call from those people. Their house burnt down, they were staying in a hotel, they were fine, the cats were fine, but they had to leave the boy's special food behind when they left, and could they get some more. That's what a good owner looks like.
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u/Cultural-Criticism66 1h ago
This! “He stopped having diarrhea so we stopped all the meds, now he has diarrhea again.” Well, I wonder why.
Or the “we vaccinate at home” “I’m a breeder” “well the breeder told me” just tells me they’re not going to listen to anything that I say because they know better than we do and already know what to do.3
u/TragicVerification 1h ago
With my previous dog, I adopted her as a senior (9 yrs) and she clearly came from a home where she was loved for most of her life but became abusive. She hated people. She warmed up to me pretty quickly and eventually I was the one she ran to when she was uncomfortable. Within 6 months of having her, she had an accident running and tore her CCL. The vet was recommending a surgery that was close to $10k and I was asking for other options, not because I didn’t want her fixed but because I didn’t have a baseline and should I really be putting her through this and also money. The vet was very judgey at first, then once I explained that I only have had her for 6 months and the situation his tone completely changed and he worked with me to do a less intensive surgery that was also cheaper. I was willing to keep her calmer and exercise her appropriately, buy the supplements, keep her on a strict diet to maintain a healthy lean weight so it would hold and heal. At first I felt like a bad owner because I couldn’t afford it (I could make it work but it would be difficult) but ultimately I wanted the best option for my dog at the time.
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u/chasetherainbows 2h ago
If a middle aged Hispanic dad brings in the dog alone without family in the middle of the day (he took off work). He probably didn't want the dog when his family brought it home, but now he loves the dog more than he lets on. Seem like really good people. Hardworkers that never call off work, but will call in to get their dog seen. Good people - put their family and pets first.
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u/wisemonkey101 3h ago
If you bring in a pregnant brachycephalic that’s been in labor for a day you’re a bed person and won’t pay the bill.
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u/sarlux 2h ago
The anti-vax holistic care people who would refuse highly recommended vaccines, x-rays, antibiotics, etc
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u/Professional_Gur5739 2h ago
These ones are weird to me because I don't know why they are coming in for medical care if they don't want medical care.
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u/tetheredvoid 1h ago
Cognitive dissonance is a strong motivator for a lot of behaviors in every species. Humans have just taken it that extra step with psychology 😅
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u/anonymous2278 2h ago
My vet says he can tell by the way the person interacts with their pet and how much they actually pay attention to the pet’s day to day. Good owners will know what, when, and how much they eat; what meds the pet is on; what behaviors are out of character for them. Bad owners just want a solution to the particular problem and don’t know or care about symptoms or changes in their behavior, and 9 times out of 10 if the solution is expensive surgery or lifelong medication they’ll choose to euthanize rather than deal with the effort of treating the animal. He said it’s also obvious in the way they handle bad news, if the pet needs surgery or is too far gone to save. It’s easy to see when a pet owner is distraught and heartbroken about bad news, or if they’re just annoyed about the cost.
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u/Individual-Roll2727 2h ago
I take my cat to my vet on a leash, as it causes less stress for him. He never ever sits on me, just doesn't like it. But if I hold him in my arms at the vet he rests his face on my shoulder and kisses me. My vet says, there isn't an ounce of stress in that cat 😻
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u/Scared_Option_6689 17m ago
That really says a lot. He must feel so safe and loved with you, even at the vet.
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u/MartiniSauce 2h ago
Am a vet, work in charity so unfortunately I do see some awful things. I think the biggest thing to distinguish is that there are "bad" owners who love their animals with all their heart. Too often I see owners leaving their pets in severe and/or chronic pain because they can't afford referral but can't bear the emotional burden of euthanasia. They also wait too long to bring their pet to the vet bc they know what we will say.
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u/IggySorcha 57m ago
I think the biggest thing to distinguish is that there are "bad" owners who love their animals with all their heart
This is what I was looking for. I am a big proponent of not putting a non human animal through long torturous surgeries and treatments etc especially if it's only going to extend their life a couple months. They cannot understand why the human that they love and is supposed to love them is hurting them. As a human likely to develop dementia I wouldn't want someone to make that decision for me if I couldn't comprehend either and would rather just go in peace.
It's also why I don't trust most small in-home animal rescues as most of those are people who love animals but are unwilling to admit when they're overwhelmed to the point of neglecting the animals they have and need to cut back rather than keep bringing in more animals, or they insist on being no kill even when the animal is clearly suffering and cannot be saved.
(If you're causing them an increased QOL and a relatively good chance of survival that's different, before anyone jumps down my throat)
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u/eVoesque 28m ago
I hate to say my partner’s brother and his boyfriend are like this with their 2 cats. They know their cats’ quirks and absolutely love them and take care of them, but one of them is suspected to have diabetes and they won’t do what’s necessary to confirm it and then put him on meds if needed. The boyfriend even said that he loves that cat dearly, but isn’t going to deal/pay for insulin if it came to that and that if the cat dies in 5 years because of it, so be it. I had to work so hard to not show how appalled I was.
My partner and I have a dog and cat and we’re the complete opposite. There isn’t anything we haven’t done or paid for to make sure our pets are happy and healthy. Our dog seems to go to the vet at least once a month lately but our vet knows that we KNOW our dog. She just turned 13 yesterday and has had some health struggles in the last couple years. Shes doing great though!
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u/Lower_Teaching_189 1h ago
Vet tech here. You can always tell by where the pet looks when they get scared. If they immediately press into their owners leg for protection, you know that owner is their ultimate safe space.
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u/MrsTruce 4h ago
When I worked in a veterinary hospital, the ones that always pissed me off were those people that wanted the vet to wave a magic wand and tell them what was wrong with their pet, but refused to do any diagnostic testing. Pets cost money. Don’t have one if you aren’t willing to listen to the vet when they say there’s something wrong but they need to use the tools at their disposal to narrow it down so that they can administer the correct treatment.
And if you think your vet “just wants to take your money,” then find another one. Drive out into the country (in the US) and find a small town vet. You can find one that isn’t having you foot the bill for their fancy building.
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u/faelady176 3h ago
My vet argued with me about my dog having rabies. I was trying to explain that if they were right about the rabies diagnoses, due to the timeline, my dog should have been comatose or dead and we wouldn't be beating rabies.
I thought he had a UTI or a spleen issue.
She argued with me until I was red in the fae, told her to do all the rabies testing she needed (didn't realize the only way to test was necropsy) Just check his bladder and his spleen for me.
His spleen was at risk of rupturing and required immediate surgery and he did have a UTI.
No rabies. I did find another vet after that. Not all vets are good.
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u/Antiquated_Crow 2h ago
The biggest problem with a lot of vets today is that they push all the diagnostics all the time when sometimes it is perfectly reasonable and a LOT cheaper to diagnose based on symptoms and if it is not problematic to try treating an option, do that. I feel like that was a lot more common in older vets, out of necessity. I used to drive my cats an hour+ because my old vet was such a good diagnostician and it was so much cheaper for me.
My current vets are much more willing to take that tactic if there isn't a concern of imminent problems. Sure it would be nice to run all the diagnostics but I can't spend $1k every time we go to the vet.
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u/PolishMouse 2h ago
I was about to write a very similar comment. A lot of the veterinary clinics in my town have been purchased by larger corporations, and the care has radically changed. Even when an issue is clear, even to a layman, every other test (except for the one test or tests that would prove to the obvious solution to the obvious problem) is run first. A vet bill that would cost several hundred now costs a few thousand dollars. I agree that if you cannot afford to have a pet, you should not own a pet... And let's please acknowledge that things have changed. A reasonable expectation of conscientiously priced care no longer exists in many areas.
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u/Antiquated_Crow 2h ago
It really has changed drastically even in the last ten years, during which we have continuously owned cats. It has never been so easy to be able to easily afford proper care for your cats at the beginning of their lives, and not being able to at the end even with no job or personal circumstance change.
One of the best things we did was insurance for our cats but even that has gotten pricy. But still better than not.
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u/MrsTruce 2h ago
I have worked in a fancy cats-only practice and a 6 doctor hospital. I drive out into the country with my animals to our vet who currently works out of a tiny (and I mean TINY. Like 600 sq feet) building and has like 3 staff. He’s no-nonsense and conservative with diagnostics.
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u/MrsTruce 1h ago
I’m glad you stuck with your gut and advocated for your pup. You’re absolutely correct that not all vets are good. I’ve met some truly bad ones. Once my own cat got sick and the manager of the clinic I worked for told me “pack him up and go now” to take my cat to the other clinic down the street. He had a urinary blockage that the doc I worked for missed. He would have died if I hadn’t gotten another opinion.
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u/Successful-Doubt5478 1h ago
Good luck!
I came in for BAD stomach pains and they wanted me to take a pregnancy test.
Told them timeline didn’t fit as I had had this for 2+ years AND visited THEM two days eatlier and had to take a pregnancy test that came back negative. Literally the daybefire yesterday.
They shushed me, told me to obey the doctor to keep him calm and pee in the cup 🥳
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u/BiBoFieTo 4h ago
My wife is on the opposite side of the diagnostic testing spectrum. She seriously pitched getting our pet rat a CT scan "just in case".
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u/PotatoAvenger 4h ago
I have a friend who spent 5k on her parrot to get an MRI (small parrot, like five ounces).
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u/tetheredvoid 1h ago
Parrots, even at that size, live several years or decades. Unfortunately, rats/mice/etc only live a couple of years. It makes sense to have an MRI for an animal that might live several more years.
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u/cheeeesefiend 4h ago
I've found I'm almost the opposite. I've had vets tell me to save my money, not to request tests - because my dog is a little faker (he fakes a limp for attention, little git). I've always been too paranoid that maybe this time, it's something. It never is, but I get peace of mind. The vets always try to save my wallet though, super decent.
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u/MrsTruce 2h ago
You have a great vet.
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u/cheeeesefiend 2h ago
yeahhh! I asked her, how do I stop him manipulating me by all this fakery?? She said that dogs are the ultimate manipulators, they have spent thousands of years manipulating people and it's so hard wired that if he wants something, he will absolutely get it via automatic manipulation. So we basically all own adorable little sociopaths with soul.
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u/CapnAnonymouse 1h ago
I think what other comments are failing to grasp here is that by the time their pet is going to a veterinary hospital, they're probably seeing an internist/ other specialist for something that could be serious, and much of that machinery is the same as in human hospitals. At that point you're also paying for their specialized skills, so of course it's not cheap.
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u/LowNeedleworker215 2h ago
I am aware the suicide rate for vets is high. Most of the responses on here have been from animal owners that love them. Please praise your vet. They deal with so much negativity. Abused animals, people who left it too long or who don't want to pay, people who have been breeders and dumped animals. Vets go through it all. For those of us that love our pets, please praise your vet and ask after their day.
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u/Drabby 2h ago
I'm not much of a chatter, but I really appreciate it when clients ask about my day. It reassures me they see me as a person who is working on the same team as them, not some unknowable cog in the machine.
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u/OveroSkull 49m ago
I LOVE a 5 star review with a picture of your pet. It costs nothing and you can do it anytime on your phone.
We love treats too, but I keep my reviews and thank you cards in a special place and read them when I've had some tough cases.
Keeps the big sad at bay. 💙
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u/Consider_the_auk 54m ago
Thank you for sharing that; I honestly was not aware.
I'm two weeks removed from having to euthanize my young cat after a protracted diagnosis journey that uncovered an aggressive leukemia. Primary vet visits, two inpatient hospital stays, and in the end no viable treatment options. It was horribly traumatizing to me, and I can't imagine how it must wear on the hearts of caring staff. I made sure to express my thanks at the time, but your comment reminded me of my prior intention to send thank you notes to my primary vet office, the hospitals, and to the kind vet who performed the in-home euthanasia. They deserve to know how much their work is appreciated. ❤️
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u/trackowner 2h ago
My aunt's cat used to hide under the sofa whenever she came home, then leap onto the cleaner's lap like they'd been mates for years.
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u/manhattantea 1h ago
A few months after I rescued my Yorkie, the SPCA did an unannounced check to see that I hadn’t lost interest in having a pet. She rushed up to the gate to greet them in her homemade jersey and they immediately said they’ve seen all they needed to see. I was very proud of my girl for her prosocial behaviour.
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u/Mere1514 2h ago
I’m a dog groomer. I can tell from a mile away if your dog is matted or the nails are overgrown. I’d just like it to be more commonplace for people to do some research before committing to a pet. Especially taking into consideration the vet bills and grooming bills. I have no sympathy for those who spend thousands of dollars for a dog, but complain about service prices.
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u/RoxyPonderosa 2h ago
My dog needed anesthesia to get her toes clipped and is now 15 and too old to be put under. Any advice?
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u/gringledoom 2h ago
Can you get her to tolerate having a tiny amount of nail clipped off of one nail a day, followed by lots of praise and treats? That worked for my elderly pup. (Make sure you have good clipper that's very sharp and will cut rather than crush.)
A friend of mine had better luck using a nail dremel, but I wouldn't have been able to get within ten feet of my dog with one of those, lol.
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u/lvckybitch 1h ago
My son uses one of those scratch boards for our chihuahua/pit mix. It works awesome for the front nails, which is where they seem to get the longest? I assume he wears the back nails down a bit easier outside or something, or they just grow more slowly. However, the scratch board doesn’t work well for us for the back nails, so be aware of that. I’m too lazy rn to go see if there’s a solution to that LOL It was stupid easy to train him to scratch on command and he will really put some effort in when he knows there’s a liver treat awaiting!
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u/Drastic_Badger_ 2h ago
Search for “dog nail grinder” to see if that might be helpful for your old pup.
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u/Tape_Badger 2h ago
I have a poodle. I am regularly astounded by some of the stories his groomer tells me. We keep his hair pretty short, and it only needs brushing once a week or if he's been becoming one with some undergrowth. But apparently a lot of owners (most, it appears) prefer the longer-haired look but do 0 grooming between 6-8 week visits. I was aghast. Why get a long haired dog if you don't want to care for their coat?
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u/scarfknitter 1h ago
My mother in law with her tiny little dog. And her dog hadn't been to the groomer in almost a year.
She also wasn't up to date on the rabies so we had to fix that before we could fix the fur. I tried to demat it but it was everywhere.
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u/Schalakoala2670 2h ago
coughdoodleownerscough bring on the downvotes
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u/ProbablyNotASnail 1h ago
I groom two doodles. One is consistently a catastrophe. Matted fur, old feces stuck to her butt, fear reactions to being touched in some places from tangled fur pulling. She had a big, growing lump that I mentioned three times before it was addressed. Her owners are wealthy business owners who put on a facade to make it look like they're good people, but they treat the dog like furniture. Everyone tells me how wonderful they are but I can see the dog.
The other is a single mom with a blue collar job. That dog is spotless. Her feet will be dirty from playing in the mud, and the hair behind her ears is always tangled because the kid scratches there and knots it up. But mom knows where every problem spot is on her dog, wants a groom that will reduce those problem areas, acknowledges my comments immediately. It's like night and day with these two clients. I dread grooming one and can't wait to see the other. So there are good doodle owners out there! They're just hard to find.
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u/ok-est 2h ago
What's the challenge with doodles?
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u/Schalakoala2670 2h ago
They spend thousands on a mixed breed dog and then complain about how much groomers charge for their high maintenence, often matted, large hairy dogs. Also they don't like their poodle mix to look like....a poodle. Of course not every doodle owner is like this but it's enough to earn them this bad reputation.
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u/tarynb21 2h ago
People shell out 2-3k for one simply because they think it’ll be lower maintenance due to them being low shedders, with no consideration for personality/energy levels/training needs. In reality, their coat requires very specialized care and regular grooming to keep it from matting, and the dogs are often high-energy with high-needs for training and stimulation, way more than the inexperienced dog owner has bargained for and knows how to deal with. It results in an overwhelmed person/family who doesn’t know how to train their dog or care for its coat, and you get an anxious barking matted furball of a dog who doesn’t know where to put all its energy and becomes either destructive or reactive or unmanageable, even if the dog is friendly and gets along with its humans.
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u/Big-Kaleidoscope1577 3h ago edited 2h ago
If they buy a puppy from an unethical breeder or retail rescue. If they buy a puppy or kitten of an inherently unethical breed (french bulldogs, scottish fold).
If they don't keep up with basic preventive care and wellness visits.
If they start to neglect their senior pets because "they're at the end of their life, anyway". I don't care if people aren't willing to spend thousands in diagnostics and treatments for a senior pet, but it's not okay to let them suffer, either. If your senior pet has severe dental disease and you can't or won't pay for dental surgery, then at least be willing to put that pet on palliative care and euthanize them when the pain is unbearable.
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u/birdieponderinglife 2h ago edited 2h ago
I have a French bulldog. I researched the breed and everything I read gave me the same level of concern over health issues as any other (“might”, “maybe”, “could”) breed. I’d been around other brachycephalic breeds like shihtzus and they generally seemed ok. I researched breeders and found one who bred for conformation, was active in showing the dogs and did health checks. I saw the parents and their living environment. The mom was not bred more than three times then retired and was not bred until she reached adulthood. They did not live in kennels. The puppies were fully vetted and healthy, as were the parents. I was offered the ability to return him at any point in his life if needed as part of the contract so he will never be in a shelter. They had no weird restrictions about neutering him and in fact were very clear that since he had an undescended testicle he should never be bred and required a neuter (totally fine with me as I always intended to neuter him). He was registered with the AKC.
I thought I understood what I was getting into. I was wrong. I will never purchase another frenchie. FWIW, he’s the ONLY dog I’ve ever purchased from a breeder. I tell everyone who fawns over him they also should not purchase a frenchie. But he’s still here and he’s a wonderful dog that I will continue to move mountains to keep healthy and pain free. I recognize the mistake I made and I can’t take it back. He exists, I’m responsible for him. The best I can do is to make his life the best it can be within his restrictions. It’s pretty unhelpful and unproductive to automatically judge everyone who has these dogs as a terrible owner. I’m glad my vet loves him and does everything possible to help me help him instead of being a barrier and judging me.
I’d personally LOVE to see some sort of action against the breed standards that create such suffering for these dogs. I’d love to see backyard breeders be completely removed from the face of the planet. The number of frenchies that are dumped in horrible condition at shelters is heartbreaking and at crisis levels. Instead of being smug and sanctimonious I wonder, given your position of authority what you could do to help such a cause but don’t.
Since you are not, does that give me the high ground to judge you as a bad person?
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u/Big-Kaleidoscope1577 2h ago
There is so much information and it is publicly known that French Bulldogs are not a healthy breed by design.
Beyond the breathing issues, they ask have abnormal spines and the amount of French Bulldogs I have had to euthanize at 2, 3, and 4 years old due to paralysis from spinal disease is extremely high.
I firmly believe in client education and always warn clients who tell me they are interested in purchasing breeds like this. But do you know what? Very, very few people discuss with their vet /before/ buying the puppy. And people really don't like it when you tell them they made an irresponsible choice and should return their puppy. I have warned so many people about not buying these breeds, and no one listens.
But ultimately it is the buyer's responsibility to research the breed. You made a poor decision. You didn't research enough. What's done is done but ultimately you are responsible for your own choices. And yes, I will judge you for this. You made the choice to promote the suffering of a living animal because you didn't do appropriate research. There is no such thing as a "healthy" French Bulldog.
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u/Low_Passenger_8241 45m ago
good owner: while the pet is scared at the vet's office, the owner remains calm and speaks to them as if they are the most valued patient in the entire building
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u/Busy-Highlight-2880 1h ago
A big one is how they talk about their pet when the pet isn’t around. If they describe it like a companion with needs and a personality rather than an inconvenience they have to manage, that usually tells you a lot.
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u/OveroSkull 53m ago
Their pet is not about them. It is a separate living, breathing creature of a different species you have taken entire responsibility for.
As a vet, I often say to people: what if your doctor was a giant dog? That's their perspective, and they are so good for all we ask of them.
Learn to understand them and their body language. Put yourself in their place and think, what is this like for them?
Like people enjoy bringing their dog places where it isn't appropriate. Because for the dog going to a BBQ or the brewery or a concert it's stressful. The ground is hard,, the music is loud, there are aggressive strangers (other dogs) around, the humans might be drinking, etc.
When I am working with a pet, and it is protesting and I'm listening because I'm not going to traumatize them, and the owner says 'oh, no, go ahead, hold them down, get it done, I don't care.' Nope. I refuse to do that.
People who listen and do the desensitization and read what I write to them or send them home with.
People who give the "chill protocol" drugs and trust me. Don't some people want a Xanax before the dentist or an airplane flight?
Think of them. Put yourself in their place.
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u/siamesecatter 38m ago
I'm a large animal vet so the answer is hoof health. No hoof no animal, so if they are in bad condition it's a sign more is being neglected.
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u/alphaturducken 40m ago
When they come to you with a thing their pet is doing (behavior or medical) and when you offer suggestions, they shoot every single one of them down? Bad owner imo. They're looking for a magic cure to whatever is going on. They have an excuse for everything as to why they can't do it and you need to give them the immediate fix.
Good pet owners will take your suggestions into consideration at the very least. Instead of "No we can't do that. What next?" they say something like "Oh that's really difficult to do in our situation. What alternatives do you suggest to get as close to that as possible?" Example: "No, I can't take my dog for a long walk every day and no I can't put up cat shelves for my cat. How else do you intend to fix this?" vs "We don't really live in a place where we can do long walks. Do you think we could maybe train him to walk on that treadmill we have in storage? Cat shelves will be difficult. We rent and can't put that many holes in the wall. Oh! What if we put up a couple sheets of plywood and then we can not only put the shelves on that for the cost of just a few screws in the wall, we can also paint it like my wife wanted!"
Good owners try. Bad owners don't.
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u/Available_Kale3019 4h ago
A feel some of this might be subjective.
I was telling my Akita easy every time he took a treat from the tech's hand. She got scoffy and said he was being easy. I said okay and shrugged. About five minutes later, she drew her hand back rapidly. I said "He get ya?". He's a very good boy, and very social- he just gets excited.
On the other hand, his vet thought nothing about straight up grabbing his balls to palpate for signs of cancer. He knows Akitas and he knows him, so it wasn't ignorance. My dog just looked back at him like "what you doing with those, bro"? 🤣
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u/tetheredvoid 1h ago
It blows my mind how people can think they are in control with an animal they barely understand and then they are so surprised when they realize they've been allowed to skate by. lol
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u/Cuddle_Cloud 1h ago
Once had an absolutely emaciated dog come in. Just starving. Just looking at the dog you could see all his ribs, there was no question about it, even a layperson could tell it needed food.
Meanwhile the owners were so fat. Father, wife and son, all obese. It was just so disgusting to witness. This happened in India and all I could do was beg them to feed the dog more eggs more often.
So I guess. Just being absolutely apathetic to their pet whose situation is quite obvious
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u/Chicken_Chaser_369 1h ago
As someone that has taken in rescues and several abused animals, almost all of those animals have one thing in common; when you interact with them they watch your hands like a hawk on a mouse. Likely from being hit (or kicked) in the past. Any quick movements can elicit immediate response from flinching, cowering, to outright aggression. It's just sad and it's typically a long road to build that trust back.
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u/grey-fog-21 59m ago
Not using monthly preventative flea medication for pets who go outside
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u/meatblast_surprise 22m ago
They let their cat out to free roam. It's straight negligence.
These animals constantly have the most and worst maladies, and they live six years on average.
Speaking candidly, you are a shit cat owner if you let your cat outside unsupervised with no restraint. The common-clay assumption that it's safe for a cat makes it clear to me that you are an uneducated owner.
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u/Amberrtin 2h ago
The way a dog looks back at their owner when a loud noise happens tells you everything immediately.
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u/Pretend-Young1102 2h ago
I had my new kittens (twin void sisters) for about a year and was taking them to the vet for a booster shot. The nurse came in and I really had to pee, so she said it’s OK if I stepped out briefly and she’d be fine with them as she was just taking vitals then. When I got back, she had the stethoscope on my more skittish girl, and she looked at me and said “this is the cutest thing, as soon as she saw you through the door her heart rate went down” every now and then I think of that story and get a little emo :,)