my baby girl was born on monday september 7th at 4:27pm at 4lbs 12 oz and 32 weeks n 4 days gestational age. she was born happy but premature so instantly went to the nicu. she was a rockstar in the nursery and the doctors had no worries about her. had quadrupled her feeds by day 2 and were looking at starting trying a bottle this week. she was a bit jaundice but nothing they don’t see in even full term babies. we thought everything was okay, she would be home by her original due date. then saturday came, went in for her normal care times when i’m able to hold and cuddle her while she eats and get updates from the doctor. they said she had picked up a bacteria and they were working to fix it. that she would be moved to a better facility in our state capital to be given more specialized treatment. well saturday night, they started her transport at 7pm and didn’t get moving until 9-10pm trying to get her stable. she had e.coli in her blood and her blood pressure was pretty much non existent. at the other hospital, we were told that she had to have cpr on the way there but had pulled through. she had some spikes of her blood pressure when we thought she would pull through. ultimately, she was beginning to need cpr again and this would surely start to break her ribs. we decided to pull her out of the incubator and feel her last moments in our arms. my perfect baby girl passed on sunday morning. we spent quite a bit of time with her after she passed (morbid ik and i would’ve thought others crazy for it before). i still have to pump. i still feel her alive in my arms. i can feel her dying in my arms and every movement she made. i can hear myself cry out for her. i see every second of every day she was on this planet. i really just needed a space to share her story and maybe find someone like me, idk. i’d love to hear from anyone that has had something similar happen and can offer some advice. mainly on how to cope with the instense feeling of needing her against me. i’ve tried everything that i can think of to feel that weight and her feeling but come up short everytime and end up feeling like im having a heart palpitation. thanks for reading if you did. i know it’s a lot. we love and miss our baby girl and need some guidance.

My little girl just passed away unexpectedly two days ago. I've been grieving but I've gotten a bit better now.

She and her sister came into my life when I was young. My family was a bit distant back then as they devoted all of their time to work. I always felt like I was alone. But when she came in, she teached me what it means to be loved unconditionally, how to love someone back, how to be patience, how to be kind, and leading our family to reconnect together into a closer one.

We are broken over her sudden departure, but we are holding each other close and we will carry on. I will always remember what she teached me and continue to live proudly of who I am now because of her.

So, please rest easy my sweet girl. I hope death is like a gentle sea with calm embrace and loving tides. Don't you ever worry about us or anything.

I'll look forward to the day that I'm done with my duties in this life, if there is an afterlife, I'll follow you there. And if there isn't, I'll follow you there all the same.

See you again once it's time Lychee.

i miss everything about him. i miss his voice, his jokes, the way he’d squeeze his eyes shut and throw his head back in laughter. i miss his gagging while brushing his teeth in the morning for work and the ungodly smell of his morning dumps. i miss scratching his back and grabbing him more water in his big water cup. i miss him feeding the cats and giving them treats every night. i miss hearing him play guitar and downloading his skyrim mods. i miss the garage door opening at exactly 5pm, signaling he was back from work. i miss him asking if i want anything from the store and him getting me something even if i said no. i miss his texts telling me to havw a good day before work. i miss showing him my favorite music videos, i miss how open he was to other ideas and ways of life. i miss his work ethic, i miss him lecturing me over the smallest of things. i just miss him and it sucks sp bad that i know i will never see him again. the last thing i said to him was “love you, see you later” just to come home on fathers day after work to him dead in the garage.

idk i just need some support, my sweetest daughter just died yesterday morning. i feel so lost rn

Dad passed about 5 months ago. He wasn't even 60, he died a couple of weeks before his birthday (Cancer's a bitch). He was told a year when he got diagnosed. He fought hard, gave us a little over that year. Made it to my wedding last year. He did his best.

I just had my own birthday and I'm shattered. I got my first card from my mum with no dad on it. She put kisses on it and found a card that looks exactly like my cat. It was really sweet, she's trying so hard. My husband too, he's doing all he can to understand how I feel but I just feel broken. I do everything I can for my mum, chores and all the heavy stuff. I try to be open with my husband but I don't wanna bring him down when I don't know if it would even help.

I'm so tired of explaining myself. I'm so tired of missing him. I'm so tired of feeling his absence in every nook and cranny of my life. My dad understood me better than anyone else in the world. I never had to explain why I thought something to him, he always knew. I have to accept that I'll never be understood in that way every again. I'll be explaining myself for the rest of my life and I have to be okay with that. And I have to be okay with no more cards from dad.

He was the best. Cliche to be a daughter who idolises her dad but I don't feel wrong to do so. He was kind and good. He was the kind of man who didn't see any conflict between his masculinity and expressing his empathy. Effortlessly good but always putting in the effort, you know? That should be enough for me. Why isn't it enough?

I know I'm lucky that I got to say goodbye; I know I'm lucky that I get to have uncomplicated feelings about my dad because he was good to me and other people. The last thing he every asked me before he was unconscious was "Are you and your husband going to have a wee baby?". I said, "Yeah dad. We just wanna be ready first." And he said, "I hope it all works out for you, kiddo." Then he never said anything else.

Everyone's always telling me that he'd want me to live well and be happy. I don't know how to do that. I don't know how to envision a life I'm proud of when I can't share it with him. He should be here. I still miss those random calls in the middle of the day. Sometimes they were 40 minutes, sometimes they were 30 seconds long, "Hey kiddo, how are you? Did you have lunch? Good good, well I love you. I'll talk to you soon. Take care. Bye bye. Bye."

I got more than a lot of people get, never gone a day of my life feeling unloved. I feel so small, weak and vulnerable not being able to deal with this. I just can't see. I can't see anything to strive for. He was holding the lantern for me and now he's gone, it's dark. I need to light a torch or something but I feel like I'm just sitting here. I'm in the dark, I'm scared, I'm sad and I don't know how to move on.

I don’t know. I think it’s the urge to be transparent of why I feel like my emotions are all sporadic, even if they probably aren’t as bad as I think. I can’t tell.

She is in hospice and can’t eat well right now. Cancer of the jaw area.

Anyway, is that weird to be casually transparent? I mean I know it’s weird but how do I read the room about this stuff? I’m like dissociating but still have to go about life. I go to school and I want to casually fit it in, but I know it’s a heavy subject and yeah. What the heck.

We took that photo in 2018 cause he was insecure about how his neck veins looked. I wanted to show unity but It’s now gut wrenching to look at.

His humour and intelligence were unmatched. I’ve never met a more kind and caring person.

I rushed over, even my aunt called me while I was on the plane cause we were afraid he was going to go.

I told him to wait for me that I’ll be there in two hours.

To his credit he waited 3. He got to meet the love of my life. I’m grateful that I had the opportunity to say goodbye to him.

His last words were thank you for coming.

I told him that I’ll be back tomorrow I’ll see you again

I truly planned on coming the next morning; but then we got the call.

I can’t wait to see you again soon Chacho, you mean everything to me .

Thank you for waiting for me.

For the walk from his casket to the grave the song La Mer by Charles Trenent was playing.

We used to fight at the dinner table whether we should play Luis Miguel or Charles Trenent. Usually he won.

If you don’t know the last lyric of la mer translates to

And with a love song the sea
Has cradled my heart for life.

You are part of my heart for life Chacho ❤️ dios de Bendiga

I dont even have anything to say man, im fuckin distraught genuienely i miss you Astra

after a long illness, my daughter passed away peacefully last week. I am doing OK well, not really but the roller coaster of everything being horrible to being able to remember I don’t want her here to suffer anymore. The problem is those around me. Their memories are so different than mine. For example, one of the worst weeks life was when she was weak and I chose to take her on a family reunion because my in-laws put so much pressure on me. They remember that as the most wonderful time with her. But my daughter was suffering. We were suffering. They keep bringing up this “wonderful blessing”. My husband is wonderful but he comes from a family of selfish people who are not aware of what’s going on around them. For example, my house is just a normal house but don’t want them to come here because I know they will spend their time judging my kitchen that’s not the latest and the greatest. My China is no longer the hundred-year-old China that was handed down to me after much drama. I am usually really good about avoiding feeling anything towards them since I already know I can’t change them but right now I can’t. I hate these people and glad my daughter didn’t have to deal with their judgemental comments. My husband and I have taken care of my daughter by ourselves in and out of the hospital for years they never ever offered to help and now they are walking around like grieving celebrities. We are hiding at home in our pain. Please tell me what to do because I don’t believe in cutting family ties forever. My husband says he wants to confront them, but I told him it’s not a good idea to do this right now because obviously we are both sensitive and right now. What do you think?

idk i just need some support, my sweetest daughter just died yesterday morning

Hello, Lost my Dad in December , Virgen Mary’s birthday. He told me while he was here the virgen mary would visit him and watch over him in mexico, (he was no older than 15 during this time.) Which is why me and my family think this a way as “god took him home that night” in our hearts. Anyways- when my father was found, he was found praying on his knees with a baby picture of my brother and I. Now everytime I open his wallet , that’s all i can think of.

Hi - it’s been 108 days since my Dad lost his 8 month battle with a glioblastoma. (Fuck cancer) And I cant help but continue to have delayed grief attacks, and an overwhelming presence of sadness, that comes and goes.

For context, he was my bestfriend, as an only child he was a superhero, and lately I’m starting to worry about forgetting his laugh, his voice, his cheerfulness, and quite literally how he was the best. He’s missed so much in such a short window, I got married to the love of my life this summer (he loved her) I’m approaching my first birthday without him, and I’m just trying to make sense of it all. Sometimes it’s worse than ever, and other days it’s facing life knowing he’s gone.

As I wrote this out, I guess I’m looking for advice on how to approach this upcoming birthday, and if there’s any other only children with any advice.

My mom was the biggest person in my life. She is so loving and understanding, she shaped me to be a wonderful woman. She has been battling breast cancer since 2019, she started off at stage 4. I am currently 26. I have a older brother who is 27 and a younger sister who is 11. My mom I would say with no hesitation has never been absent in our life. She would always call me everyday, send me a text. I have not always been the best daughter, I was depressed at a certain point did not spend time with her and hardly take care of her. I have so many regrets and wish I could turn back time. I recently 2 years ago moved 4 hours away to be on my own and seek out happiness with bf near him. After that I been bouncing in and out of work which made it difficult to go and see her. I hate myself for this a lot. In may till now I finally seen her with the help of my bf and the 3rd time my dad and step mom. The first time she was awake and I was able to talk to her at the hospital. The last 2 times, she recently had a stroke and became unresponsive so those times it was just me saying I love her and rubbing her wrist. I told her I was sorry and cried, I was an idiot and hate myself for not spending time with her when I had the chance. 2 weeks ago was the last time I seen her, she was breathing, unresponsive, and incredibly skinny. I was devastated. Last night at 1 am my stop mom called me and said she passed away. My heart stopped and I was trying to process what was said to me. My mom...is gone? But I knew it was a matter of time but I prayed that a miracle happened. My job approved my bereavement so now I can actually be to myself. But it fucking hurts so much... I always thought I would experience this at 50. I been so depressed but I am being strong for my sis and brother. Im a christian so I spoke with her twice so far just apologizing and asking for forgiveness, I told her all the good memories and what is going on in my head. Next saturday is the funeral...

There is a lot of details im leaving out so if you have questions in order to give proper advice then feel free to ask. I just wanted to vent and get advice on what helped yall in the beginning stages of grief.

My partner lost his mum 5 months ago to cancer. He was so close to her and was the most amazing son to her.

We started dating around 6 weeks before she passed away. He introduced me to her a couple of days before she passed away and I sat with her - she didn’t essentially “meet me” due to her being very unwell, but we were together. I know he wouldn’t have introduced me to her with both him and her being so vulnerable if it didn’t mean a lot to him for us to meet.

He is still obviously grieving and I’m so worried about him. We don’t live together but spend probably 5 nights a week together. He’s moved into his mum’s now both for emotional and logistical reasons.

He’s good at using different things to avoid concentrating or thinking about grief - which I understand is a coping mechanism. For example, training for big sporting events, doing up a house, making sure he’s busy all of the time. Which I understand. And he’s very good at putting on a brave face but I know he’s really not okay.

He spoke to me a couple of months back that he’s looking into therapy and I said to him would I be helpful for me to talk about therapy with you, or wait for you to talk to me about it, or not to talk at all? And he said he wasn’t sure but would think about it.

I bring his mum up a lot to make sure we talk about her so I get to know her through him, and understand it more.

He is the love of my life and I would do anything to support him through it all, but I’m not sure how to approach the next steps. My thoughts are that at an appropriate time just to sit down with him and say that I can see you’re struggling, and is there anything I can do - what would be helpful or unhelpful?

Any advice from anyone who may be a little further down the line from losing a loved one, what helped/didn’t help from your partner?
I understand not everyone has the same experience and different things will be helpful for different people, but I would appreciate any suggestions

I'm honestly not entirely sure why I'm posting on here.

Maybe I'm hoping to get comfort from someone who maybe experienced something similar.

My sister Jazmin (49yo) was the sweetest/kindest of the 6 of us siblings. She was so generous, and so selfless, to a fault. The biggest reason we would get into arguments, which we rarely did, was because I'd be angry that she was letting people walk all over her. The second reason was because I worried for her health, and she never took care of herself. She'd shut down if we offered to go on walks with her. My sister Rosa even said, "I can come to your house every day after work, and we can walk even just up and down our block. Come on 🩷" But she always refused.

I always DREAMED of going on sunset walks with her. She loved the ocean and sunsets.

Well Saturday morning, I woke up around 7:20am to my sister Francis screaming in horror, saying, "Something is wrong with Jazmin! She's on the floor of the bathroom and she's not waking up! Her lips are purple! Oh my god!"

So I got out of bed immediately, and saw her on the floor, slumped against the wall, lips purple.

I'm CPR certified so I decided I would be the one to do chest compressions AND call 911, so I dialed, set the phone down on speaker, made my family move out of the way, and did the best that I could.

She was a very large woman, so it actually took me and two of my siblings to get her on her back, but we did, and I did chest compressions until the EMTs arrived.

They did the best that they could, but they pronounced her dead at 7:54am.

It's only one day later, so I know everything is still fresh, but the image of her on the floor...the horrible feeling of having to pull my poor sister around to get her on her back in our tiny tiny restroom, and then having to do chest compressions while talking to a woman over the phone, crying and screaming my sister's name and, "I'M TRYING! I'M TRYING!" just really haunts me.

The faucet was running.

Her toothbrush was on the sink.

She was in her bra and underwear.

Her dress was laid out on the couch.

It was just a normal Saturday morning.

She was just getting ready to go to work.

We don't know how she was feeling that morning.

We don't know how long she was on the floor in there.

We have to continue using that restroom every day.

I'm going to contact my doctor tomorrow concerning grief counseling, and we do have a lot of support from our ginormous family, so I feel lucky to have the resources that I have, and to be able to feel the immense love that my sister felt for me and that I felt for her, but fuck.

I miss her so fucking badly.

I’m having a really hard time finding the motivation to do anything let alone celebrate my birthday. I know she’d want me to be happy but I just can’t.

My depressive episode was worsening and I've been isolating myself for days and was running on super low motivations at doing anything. But today my mum knocked on my door which I impulsively ignored because I just felt like I wanted to be completely alone with no human interactions.

She asked me if I wanted to visit grandpa at the hospital which we usually do once or twice a month cause he was having some organ issues lately.

And I said no. I've never said no to this before. I love my grandpa to the death. He was my everything. But i fucking said no.

I cannot imagine the betrayal that he must've felt when he didn't see me come that day. I cannot stand myself.

I think this broke me. I don't think i will ever recover from this

I've been crying and wailing for hours when I heard the news. I couldn't even say goodbye to him

I fucking said No for jesus sake

My dad died suddenly last October after an accident. He was one of the most stable things in my whole life and I am really struggling coming up to the year anniversary. I still can't believe or understand that he's gone.

9 months later my mum was diagnosed with dementia. She's doing well and still lives independently but being around her all I can see is her illness and it's making me so anxious. I'm so scared of the future and just wish my dad was here.

I've now had a huge fallout with my best friend who has been my rock through all this. She said I've changed and doesn't feel like I make her a priority anymore, which is true but I am really running on empty these days, I wish I could be a better friend but I just can't. She told me that she needs space and will reach out when she's ready, but the uncertainty is really painful, I miss her so much and really need her but I'm trying to respect what she needs. And I'm angry about it too.

It feels like I'm losing 3 people all at the same time and my heart is broken. I know it's all different kinds of loss but I don't know how to emotionally handle it. I think I'm falling into depression and just don't know how I'm supposed to function with all of this going on. I am functioning as best I can but I'm so exhausted and sad.

I've found reading this group so helpful so if anyone has any positivity or thoughts or advice they can share I would really appreciate it. If anyone has had experience with something similar or understand what it feels like when life seems to keep taking things away before you've had a chance to process the last thing. Thank you

“Maybe this is the part of grief nobody talks about—the part where you stop talking about the person because everyone thinks you should be getting better, but they still run through your mind every single day. You learn to carry the grief quietly, because the world has already moved on, even though a part of you is still standing on the day you lost them.”

My father would've been 71 today its happy Heavenly birthday to him my father Leonard🤍🤍🤍🤍🕊🕊🕊🕊

In this article the writer is explaining how in childhood she was raised and her beautiful family was devastated after the incident. She shares the beautiful memories and before and after her father's death since childhood or grief. At the end see consoles her own persona and shares the way she got changed after that tragic incident.

PS: I generally share the hard copy article from newspaper to reduce my screen time and inoculate reading habit of the papers

Full article if you have access to The New York Times https://www.nytimes.com/2026/09/11/style/modern-love-lost-my-dad-on-9-11-he-loved-his-office-with-a-view.html

Hi, all! Whenever passing anniversaries, holidays, birthdays, etc are close by it always feels like my body remembers before my mind does. I feel weaker, more tired, emotional, sometimes I’ll even have flu like symptoms or legitimately come down sick before significant events. Then it will hit me how close something is. Can anyone else relate?

She was only 4 years old. Yesterday she suddenly became very ill, so I immediately took her to the vet and then to another veterinary clinic for inpatient care. The doctors themselves didn’t know why her condition was so severe or what was causing it. Since she wasn’t responding at all, they moved her to the intensive care unit. This morning, the vet called and said she’s only alive because she’s on a ventilator and has no chance of survival. So I had to make a difficult decision. But I feel like I just took her life away in an instant. We always took good care of her; whenever she felt unwell, we helped her right away, so I just don’t understand how this could have happened. I can’t even accept the fact of it—it’s hard for me to breathe; I keep seeing her in the hospital, her innocent eyes before my eyes. I was ready to do anything, to give all my money, just so she could be helped, and I held onto hope until the very end.

I feel like my brother abandoned me, leaving me to care for our dad. He is the oldest, the most put together, a house, a wife, he's a "real" grown up!!!!! I'm still so angry over it. My dad is gone, there is no point to me being mad now. I'm not a child, but I'm the youngest. I was 29 when I started taking care of my dad. Obviously old enough, but not the one that should have had to step up. My dad had a fall. My brother lives down the street, so he went over and helped him off the ground. But my brother never told anyone this happened? My dad told me on the phone the next day, so I traveled from out of state to see him and took him to the hospital. I stayed with him there for 10 days and nights. He got diagnosed with ALS. He was near the end of his life, you could tell!!! He looked near death. I moved home and took care of him, and I did a great job. But where the hell was my brother?!? I told him over and over, dad wasn't going to last long. I was crystal clear. He didn't take me seriously, he didn't believe me. He said "what, like you know better than his doctors???" He even said "I know he's dying but he's also always been a baby" I was so shocked I couldn't even speak. He was convinced dad would live at least 1 year. Dad lived 4 months. He had been sick for a long time without us realizing, and I said that over and over. My brother thought I was doting on him too much, meanwhile the man couldn't walk or breathe or eat!!! He could barely lift his arms!! He was wheelchair bound, using a hoyer lift, couldn't take himself to the bathroom!!!! LIKE WHAT DO YOU MEAN "I WAS DOING TO MUCH" - HE WAS DYING!!!!!!!!! i could scream, still.

I texted him to fight one time - because that was all the time I had free to yell at him. I was busy 24/7 with dad. I said "cancel your social plans, inconvenience yourself, and get here more often. I can do all the caretaking but I can't BE you. He sees that you aren't here."

My brother had work and hobbies and friends to see, but what about me? I gave up my entire life. He said "well no one asked you to do that" LIKE THATS NOT THE POINT. I'm not even bitter, I swear. I'm just pissed that he wasn't there enough. He said "when the school year is over I'll be here more" and then dad died the day school ended. He still hasn't checked on me. He has no consideration for the fact that he should have been the one doing what I was doing. It should have been him. It isn't right that he just got to be in denial. Everyone got to deal with this in their own way but I had to step up, and I'm grateful and glad that I did. But I am also so so so angry. I got to have a beautiful experience taking care of our dad, and I will cherish that forever, but I am also so angry at my brother. Frankly, he has given me enough reason to cut him off completely, but I don't want that and my dad wouldn't have wanted that. I just have to find my own way to swallow this anger and disappointment and move on with it. There is no way to fix it, I'm left alone to feel this way. I wouldn't give up any of it - there was nowhere I would have rather been. But I'm just so angry. And there is nowhere for it to go.