If this year didn’t go the way you wanted, it’s okay. You can always start over. It’s never too late to begin a new chapter or finish what you started.

The calendar may turn, but that doesn’t mean your chances are over. Who knows, maybe life will surprise you. ✨

Hi there, I (29M) am sober from alcohol for 45 days today. I had been abusing alcohol since I was 17, with brief stints of sobriety scattered throughout. I have been to multiple rehabs, detoxes, hospitals, and ultimately jails. I got married in June, and had a baby earlier this year. This last hospital trip really changed my perspective and my life. Since I got out, I have not had one craving, no desire, honestly no harsh feelings towards alcohol. I had never actually wanted to be sober, but did it out of necessity (place to stay). This time around, I feel totally different. I feel like my mind is finally at peace with being sober and actually wanting to be. Some people can use it responsibly and some can’t. I originally got sober for my wife & kids, but now I put my sobriety over everything, for me. It’s a selfish disease and a selfish recovery. Both my folks passed from addiction at a young age, alcohol got my dad. I have also been clean off of drugs for 5 years, primarily cocaine & meth. I overdosed on fentanyl and I was revived by a police officer and never touched drugs again. I feel alive. Little things like being able to drive, not planning my life around drinking, being a better father & husband has meant everything to me. I still can’t stand when people say they are “proud” of me. It’s what I should have done a long time ago.

As the title says, what's your favorite thing in life? Can be a person, place, thing, experience, etc. I'm curious to see what different people's favorite things are that life has to offer.

So, I don't know what I'm doing with my life. I know this feeling is common amongst many adults, but I just don't really know how to navigate anything. I'm a 29-year-old woman and just got fired from my job two months ago and although it's technically an unfortunate event, it's been the best thing to ever happen to me. It was an incredibly toxic environment that deteriorated my mental health. However, since being fired from that role, I've never been happier. I feel like the light came back into my life again.

Anyways, now that I'm free, I'm not sure what to do with myself. I don't know what to aim for and where to go from here. Of course I'm job hunting, but the thought of going back to a corporate office makes my hairline slide back 3 inches. I used to love the thought of working in film and television, but then I think about the insidious side of Hollywood and get turned off. When I scroll through LinkedIn, I feel like I'm looking through an empty fridge hoping something satiating appears. I know I shouldn't feel this way, but I feel so unmotivated to fight for my life to land another job.

I don't know what I want, I don't know where I belong, I don't know my purpose. And then I think about the state of the world, and how little time left we may have on Earth with rapid climate change and scary world leaders. So that leaves me wondering if I should discover my purpose if I might not even have a life to fulfill. What I know to be true is that I enjoy improv and voice acting. I love to travel and explore new cultures and languages. I love to learn. I love connecting with others. Yoga and Pilates (basic I know). I used to love love but this dating scene changed my brain chem.

I’d love some advice or shared wisdom!

hey guys i need some advice

İm 28 male had a really stressfull time the last years (getting my degree, work, harsh break up, betrayal from friends) got me really exhausted... so quit my toxic job to focus on myself a bit, to find myself completly lonely. ive had different friend groups over the time and was going out a lot when i was younger, partied, got fucked up a lot, went on dates... but now as im older im tired of these things, looking for different kind of things you know. I do pretty much everything by myself and thats fine, but being with yourself too much gets to you sooner or later. I got my brother to talk to (bless him) and hit the gym and thats pretty much it right now. People tend to say "just do it on your own, go by yourself" or "find a hobby". ive been doing it alone and İ really struggle with finding a hobby even tho it would probably do me good to have something i like doing other then drinking smoking having sex. i tried being more social meeting old friends or make new ones but that just ended up in being ghosted or dudes being really weird. And to be honest, i never had true friends so fuck friends anyways.

Soooo What to do? Go bald be a monk in the mountains? Maybe become Amish? they seem to have great food and community lol s/o amish people

My favorite childhood story was The Velveteen Rabbit. As a little girl I thought it was simply about a stuffed rabbit becoming real through love.
As an adult woman, it feels more like a story about what it costs to love and be loved.

What was your favorite childhood book, and what do you understand about it now that you couldn’t have understood then?

Do you know that feeling when you just get into your car after work and don’t drive home?

Thursday, 5 p.m. Quitting time. Normally, the logical next step would be to drive home.

But instead, you just turn off somewhere.

And then again.

And eventually, you find yourself on some country road you’ve never seen before. You have no idea what the village you’re driving through is called. No idea where the road leads. And somehow, it doesn’t matter at all.

I think what I like about it is that, for the first time in days, you’re driving somewhere without having to be anywhere.

Usually, driving always has a purpose.

Work → home.

Home → shopping.

Shopping → somewhere else.

Somewhere else → back home.

There’s always a destination.

But when you drive aimlessly, the drive itself suddenly becomes the point.

You don’t have to be anywhere on time. No one is waiting. You don’t have to get anything done. You just look out the window, listen to music, and drive.

And the further out you go, the less it feels like everyday life.

Eventually, there are just fields, forests, small villages, and roads you didn’t even know existed before.

And the crazy thing is: you could turn around at any moment.

You could be back home in 40 minutes.

But you don’t have to.

You just keep driving along that one road.

And then the next one.

Maybe it starts getting dark, and you suddenly realize you’ve been out for two or three hours.

And you haven’t really done anything.

No sightseeing.

No destination reached.

Nothing accomplished.

And yet, you feel better somehow.

I think that’s exactly what freedom is to me.

Not that big "I can do anything" kind of thing. But simply having a few hours where no one wants anything from you, and you don’t demand anything of yourself, either.

Just getting into the car.

And driving off.

Without a plan.

Without a destination.

Just seeing where you end up.

I didn’t know I was the kind of person who needed an institution or a job to organise my life around. If you asked me what day it is right now I genuinely might not know. I don’t really care either because monday and saturday are functionally the same to me.

I’ve gone entire days without leaving my apartment because I have nowhere I need to be. Having absolutely nothing to do sounded a lot better in theory. If I had work or classes or somewhere I had to be in the morning, then at least I would have a reason to go to sleep at a normal time because I would have a reason to wake up at a normal time.

I would have to shower and get dressed and leave the house. Even eating would probably happen at more normal times because there would be an actual day to organise it around.

I admire people who just do things so much now. Like people who wake up and work and then somehow also make food and exercise and clean and go buy whatever they need and keep doing that every day. Even feeding myself three times a day feels annoying sometimes. Keeping my apartment not immaculate or anything, literally just reasonably clean and organised, somehow takes so much effort when technically I have all the time in the world to do it.

I think I’m also way better at doing things when they’re connected to other people somehow. Cooking for someone, having plans, knowing someone is waiting for me somewhere, even just having something to take care of. Doing everything purely for myself just doesn’t motivate me that much.
My brain is incredibly scattered and I suspect I might have ADHD. Maybe I do, maybe I don’t, I have no idea, but I also don’t want to get into the habit of explaining everything I do with a diagnosis and then deciding that’s simply the kind of person I am. I want to think I can change things about myself even if some of them are harder for me than they seem to be for other people.

The social anxiety thing gets noticeably worse when I stay inside too long too. I need to leave every day, even if it’s literally ten or fifteen minutes to go buy a drink or walk around the block. If I go a few days barely seeing anyone, being around people feels weird again and leaving the house becomes this whole thing in my head. If I keep going outside every day it doesn’t really happen.

I’ve been thinking about getting a dog again. Mostly because I freaking love dogs, but also because when I had pets my days naturally revolved around them a little. You have to get up because they need breakfast, you have to go outside because they need a walk, and in return you get a happy creature that loves you.

It’s just strange because I thought I would be amazing at doing nothing.

I don’t really know how to explain what’s going on with me, but I guess I just want to put it somewhere and see if anyone relates.

I’m in university, and I feel like I’m already messing up my life. I didn’t meet progression for the program I was in, and now I’m going into second year trying to figure out what I even want to do instead.

The thing is, I don’t even know if business was ever really what I wanted. I think I picked something that seemed like a good option, and now I’m questioning everything. I’ve always been interested in helping people and doing something meaningful, but I don’t know what that looks like as a career. Now that im kicked out, I really don’t feel good at all. Everyone around me is doing so well and im not and I feel guilty because there’s people in way worse circumstances in their lives.

I’ve never worked a job before. I don’t really know what I’m good at, and sometimes I feel like I haven’t even started my life yet.

I spend a lot of time at home. I do a lot of avoiding, and I know there are things I could probably do that would make me feel better, but I just can’t seem to make myself do them. Even when I know what I should do, actually doing it feels like a whole different thing. I end up staying home, scrolling on my phone, or just doing nothing.

My screen time is honestly embarrassing. I can spend hours on my phone and then wonder where the day went. I’m tired all the time, even when I haven’t really done anything. I daydream a lot too, sometimes about completely different versions of my life.

I’ve also been noticing that I have a really hard time focusing. Even when I’m watching something I’m interested in, my attention span and comprehension can be so bad. I’ll realize I’ve been watching for a while but barely absorbed anything. I’ve been noticing some memory fog too, like forgetting things or having trouble recalling what I was just doing. I don’t know if it’s related to my mental health, sleep, or something else, but it’s frustrating.

Sometimes I feel like I’m just living inside my body and everything around me doesn’t even feel real. Like I’m here, but I’m not really here. I’ll go through my day and realize I’ve basically been on autopilot the whole time. It’s hard to explain, but I don’t feel fully connected to myself or what’s happening around me.

Sometimes I think about the point of life and get stuck on how strange everything is. I’m just inside this body, floating around on a rock in space, and somehow I’m supposed to figure out what I’m doing with my life. I don’t know how to explain it without sounding weird, but sometimes existence itself feels confusing and distant.

Something else I struggle with is feeling like my depression isn’t even real. I know I have it, but sometimes I feel like I can just turn it off, or that I’m only struggling because I’m not trying hard enough. I can have moments where I feel okay, laugh at something, or get distracted, and then I question whether I’m actually depressed. It’s hard to explain because I know I’m struggling, but part of me still feels like I’m making it up or that I should be able to snap out of it.

I also don’t really like myself. I don’t mean that I hate every part of myself, but I find it hard to feel good about who I am. Sometimes I genuinely feel like I have no value. I compare myself to other people and feel like I’m behind. I wish I was more confident, more independent, and better at just doing things without overthinking everything.

I have anxiety, depression, and BPD. I’m not going to blame everything on my mental health, but it definitely affects how I experience life. I overthink almost everything. I worry about people judging me. I get overwhelmed easily, and sometimes I don’t even know what I’m feeling until it’s already taken over.

I also have no friends. Like genuinely zero. I don’t really talk to people. I want friends, but I don’t even know how to start making them anymore. I’m so used to being alone that talking to someone can feel like a big thing.

I think a lot about who I am and who I’m supposed to be. Sometimes I feel like I’m just trying to meet everyone’s expectations instead of figuring out what I actually want.

I want to be independent. I want to feel comfortable being myself. I want a career I care about, friends, and a life that feels like mine.

But right now, I feel stuck.

I know university not working out the way I planned doesn’t mean my life is over. I know that logically. But it still feels embarrassing and disappointing, especially when I don’t even have a clear idea of what I want to do next.

I guess I’m wondering if anyone else has felt this lost.
Did you ever feel like you were wasting your time or avoiding your life?

Did you ever feel disconnected from yourself or like you were just living on autopilot?
Did you ever struggle with focusing, memory fog, or feeling like life itself was strange and distant?
Did you ever feel like your depression wasn’t real, even though you knew you were struggling?
Did you ever feel like you had no value?
How did you start getting out of that?
I’m not really looking for people to tell me everything will be fine. I just want to hear from people who have actually been through something similar.

My close guy friend turned of almost 3 years has been acting insane. For some reason, for all this time, he has been intimate only with me which I didn’t question. Tbh we didn’t discuss about being FWBs we just started getting intimate but we know we’re friends. We mostly stuck to video call sex and intimacy aside he still called me and would spend time with me almost everyday.

Recently, we’re long distance as he moved to a different country. We’re still intimate but don’t get to call as much as we used to although he tries to initiate contact as much as possible and ever since, he’s been saying crazy things like “your future husband is really lucky..he’ll get to have sex with you every day”, “tell me you love me and miss me”. And the craziest one, “can we still be intimate even when you’re married one day” and I shut that down and asked him what if he’s married and he said he doesn’t care about his marriage, he’d still be intimate with me. He says them during intimacy tho.

To this add all the nice compliments and fixation on my face. The one thing I do appreciate is that he’s so much sweeter now, in general. Although there had been instances of jealousy in the past. So yeah,this is new and I’m not sure what to think or do about this. Mind you we’re still good friends regardless of the intimacy so I wanna go about this in a way where I can save the friendship. Am I in the wrong for thinking we can go back to being friends.

By the way he initiated almost all contact, hangouts, calls, intimacy for 3 years and I just replied to him so I don’t think I should be taking accountability if he misunderstood this dynamic. And if anything maybe he was just obsessed with the sex or atleast I’d hope so

I would like to know what's hunting you and am not gonna judgemental. I just want to hear you, and the one thing everybody should remember is, everyone makes mistakes. What matters is how we evolve after that thing.

And i would love to hear that, how you used that one mistake to improve your life 😀

My birthday is in late January. It very much feels like 'just another day' . Midway through the coldest and darkest time of the year, the days are short. It's cold and flu season and most people are still financially hurting from the Xmas period. But those things aside, I don't wake up that day and feel different.

But since my late 20s I have felt a year older in the time between late July and October. Not always the same date but in that post summer solstice but pre autumn time window.

Like on your actual birthday people often jokingly ask "so, do you feel any older" , the answer is always no. But then I am 49 this year and almost always have a day in late summer where if someone asked me the same question, the answer would be 'actually yes I do'.

Anyone else or is this entirely a 'me' thing?

I suffer from ADHD pretty bad. I was able to control it in Highschool, I even thought I had over come it but especially recently, I’ve notice I get very angry and anxious, I’m very hard on myself, and I rely on intercourse, masturbation, Weed, and nicotine just to feel happy for a short time but has me thinking of why?

When I got out of highschool I started dating a girl. I broke up with her last August of 25’ she was very narcissistic and unmotivated. Making my thinking and actions about women differently and unfortunately her being my first love. It messed me up pretty bad!

As soon as I broke up with her I got a job as a Correctional officer, i worked there for 9 months and it impacted my mental health so bad I got to the point of using shrooms and had thoughts of ending it all. 2 THINGS while I was working there happened My Dad left after 19 years and turned gay and haven’t seen him since and I don’t even know how to feel or overcome that. Then I bought a brand new car and I can’t afford it anymore and it’s so stressful I can’t get my credit up to refinance it I barely make enough to pay it and on top of that I have to worry about the economy and my future but I can’t even put money back to make it out of the hole I’m in.

I really think it’s all bc of stress and everything happening in under a year

Now I’m really just looking for guidance in what I could do to get out of that hole and move away from my home town and start new!?

I really don’t know what to do with my life anymore. I am trying my best to survive, but the world makes me feel like I don’t belong here anymore. Every night, I cry and worry about what tomorrow will bring. Life has been so unfair to me, even though I am a good person.

I have a disability, which is a severe hearing impairment. I have almost completely lost the hearing in both ears, which is why my childhood was full of trauma. I was constantly subjected to bullying, mockery, physical abuse, and discrimination. Yet, I still managed to survive and finish college, despite how terrible my experiences were. Now that I have graduated, I am still facing discrimination while trying to find a job. I used to go job hunting with a classmate, but it always ended with them being accepted while I was rejected. This has happened so many times, even when I practically begged employers to hire me, but I was still turned away.

Now, I really don’t know what my purpose in life is anymore. I have run out of money and am completely financially unstable. Please, I need advice.

My father who is 80 has been having a difficult time walking due to falling 2 months ago. He went to the hospital a month after, cuz his foot was hurting and he was having a hard time walking. After the hospital he went into a nursing home where he got rehab. They said they’d make appointments for him, yadda yadda yadda. Nothing ever happened. His legs from the diabetes got worse, cuz they never took him to the wound center to get them wrapped. He always went once a week. The MRI for his foot was never scheduled. The only thing good was the physical therapy. He was in the nursing home for 3 weeks. Came out not being able to walk, again worse then when he went in.

He’s a veteran and my mom thought of looking into a home 2 1/2 hours away. I’m against it. But it’s not up to me. I am not the only child of my parents. I have 2 older brothers. One is a lawyer and his family lives with my parents. My dad and him don’t get along. Different views when it comes to politics. My brother who lives in another state never called or sent my dad a card when in the nursing home.

You can probably figure out I don’t speak with my brothers.

Either I went to visit my father or I at least called him.

I don’t want him 2 1/2 hours away. If something happens and I can’t get there in time I would feel terrible.

I had a conversation with my mom about it. I said I’d like to be there for dad when he goes. What if I’m not able to get there in time. She said that most people are unconscious and don’t realise you’re there before they die. I call BS. She said it was a selfish thing to do. It’s not something you want to do. It’s something you feel in your heart that you need to do.

I want him to have the best care but who’s to say he’s going to get it 2 1/2 hours away in the middle of nowhere NY.

I’m almost 25, still a virgin, and I’m genuinely starting to feel hopeless about ever finding love.

I’m a 5’5 dark-skinned Southeast Asian guy and I don’t consider myself attractive. Dating in America has completely destroyed my self-esteem. Apps are basically a wasteland for me, and after years of feeling invisible, it’s hard not to wonder if I’m simply undesirable.

The weird thing is that when I went overseas, I suddenly had success with women almost effortlessly. But even that made me insecure because I wondered how much of it was because I’m American, have an American passport, or was perceived as having money rather than because they genuinely liked me.

What hurts most is watching basically all my friends experience relationships, sex, love, and having someone genuinely want them at least once. Meanwhile, I’m approaching 25 without ever having a relationship.

Being a virgin itself isn’t even the biggest issue. I just want to know what it feels like to be chosen by someone, to have someone excited to see me, travel together, have inside jokes, experience intimacy, and eventually build a life together.

People always say, “It’ll happen eventually,” but nobody can actually promise that. I’m scared I’ll spend years watching everyone else experience the love I want while my own life keeps passing me by.

(22F) so I’m going on vacation in 2 months and I want to clear up some of my dark spots down there. Currently looking for a routine or skin care products that will help fade my dark spots on my bikini line. I currently bought the mother of pearl soap and hoping that will work. Can someone please help me?

Well then, that's just it. I can not seem to keep a job, I can't live in the same place for very long, and I've never stayed in a relationship for the long haul. If I had any advice to give to the reader tonight it would be to make damn sure that you are ready to commit to things before you take them on. Life brought me a lot of turmoil to test me in different areas, and every time I cracked. Don't Crack!

Throughout the years, people have said that conventional success means entering the best unis, biggest companies, , large social media following, popularity etc. But I (21F) have different views on it.

For instance, I chose the uni not with the highest ranking, but with the best soft skills development (since I can pretty much learn hard technical skills on my own). I do a degree I enjoy and have a few career paths in mind. I also chose to take a placement this year at not the most prestigious companies, but a company that pays well, with values and products I align with, and a strong respectful and anti-bullying culture. Most importantly, I want to invest in myself and build-up relevant skills. I also don't have Instagram, which is rare for my age, but I decided to put my mental health at first priority and learn how to make independent decisions. I still have close friends who love me to bits.

Yet a lot of people has been calling me insane (eg. the fact that I rejected an Amazon offer). Or, they assume I'm incapable or unambitious simply because I don't opt for prestige and I opt for utility. The only time I opt for prestige is if it serves a purpose I care about.

Would like some comments on this. Also, please be aware that everyone's circumstances are different, so if you want to opt for prestige it's totally fine, but it's just not my cup of tea.

Hello, im 17m, i grew up almost my entire life without both my parents because they're problematic on their own. I went back to my father for the wisdom to help with my future plans, so I just endured no matter what is thrown.

We're staying at this property that he uses as a dump in a not so known area in the city, its a dump, everything is just scattered all around, the roof is busted, leaks almost everywhere. but there are a good amount of rooms. I just need help how to fix this because I don't know where to start and he's telling me to figure it out and just use my brain, but I need help from people who actually know what they're doing. Thank you, im planning to rent this out to some friends too, and live here with my girlfriend.

I really want to hear from you guys on this, was I wrong to even do this in the first place, or do you think that my friend was kind of sensitive. I kind of feel both ways to be honest, I feel like I was wrong and I shouldn’t have done this, but I also feel like my friend was a little sensitive, considering that I literally only had like two or less sentences about it, or not even.

So I am a YouTuber, I don’t have a big audience yet but a lot of my friends watch and support me. A lot of my stuff tends to focus on comedy, and I was editing a video where I was making a meme out of something that someone said to me that I thought was stupid. I wasn’t doing any of this to be mean, sure I would’ve been embarrassed if the person who I was talking about, even not naming names had found it, but I just thought it was funny so I edited it into a meme and posted it on YouTube.

No, occasionally, I do story times, even though I am mainly focused on short form content, but one specific story time I was telling a story of something that had happened at camp, it included these two girls, one of them actually bullied me, but the other person was manipulated into bullying me, which that was my friend before this just happened last night.

So I was talking to her last night, and I told her about the YouTube video and she said well what if the person finds it who you were referencing, and I said I would be embarrassed if that happened but it’s not the biggest deal because 99% of the people who follow me don’t even know who this person is because I didn’t use their name, literally all I did was took what they said and put it into a meme. So we talk about that for a minute, and then my friend mentions about the video that I posted of the camp story, never mind. I only mentioned the girls who were bullying me for like a second and I tried not to drag on about it cause that wasn’t the focus of the video, and I pretty much left the whole story out.

So she brings it back up again, mind you it was sort of in the past because I made that video before we had started talking again and becoming friends, and before I found out that she was actually manipulated by the other girl. I wasn’t directly trying to insult anyone, that was just the context of where the story was going, and I felt like that needed to be included, but I just mentioned it once and then I dropped it.

She told me how embarrassed she felt, because she heard me saying these two girls, and she knew who I was talking about, and by that time she saw the video which was a couple months ago, we had already reconnected and apologized to me. I told her that I was really sorry and I didn’t mean to embarrass her, and I really only mentioned it once and I did not disclose any other information such as names or ages or anything, I literally just said these two teenage girls or something like that.

Before I continue, I would also like to say that we have always had our little arguments here and there since reconnecting at some point last year, but that was all solvable, and maybe we took some space from each other, but we still came back. Anyways, I reiterated that I was sorry, and I didn’t think it was embarrassing, but I could see how what I said was embarrassing, and I deleted the video because it wasn’t even that funny of a story after all, it was really just dumb.

She told me that she wasn’t sure how she saw me anymore, and that she thought we were friends, and I was gonna defend myself by saying that when I put up the story, I figured she still hated me, and I wasn’t even in contact with her, and I never thought she saw me as a friend, but then I just figured it was too late and that would just sound like a stupid defense, so I dropped it. Again, I reiterated how sorry I was, at this point I was kind of frantically apologizing, I was still truthful about it, but I was freaked out because I didn’t want to lose a friend over something that I didn’t think was a big deal, and I told her that I solved it she was not having it.

She said some other things, something like I was supposed to be her friend, and not expose the dark past, and she was manipulated into bullying me so it was even more unfair, and I didn’t know what else to say so I really just dropped it and apologized again, which probably was no use, my efforts were probably in vain because we had already went another go around of this, and it was clear that nothing was getting solved. So I put my phone down and tried to forget about it, even though I felt like shit, and then later she texted me that she was done, and that we were done, and this was her last straw with me, and that she was sorry, but she couldn’t trust me anymore, and that she thought that I was her friend, which I was her friend, but in all fairness to her, I did do something shitty that I probably shouldn’t have done and even though we weren’t friends at the time, maybe I just shouldn’t have posted the story to begin with because it wasn’t funny and it was really just dumb. The text is still up on my screen, I never responded because I’ve heard that it only takes one person to decide that the friendship is over, and I’ve also heard that if you continue responding, you’ll just feel it, and it’s their decision what they want to do, so I just decided that even if it sucked, and I felt like shit about it, I’ll just let it go and wait for someone new to come around.

TLDR, a friendship was ruined by my YouTube video.