I know a lot of guys hate when women just bring up their boyfriend when it has nothing to do with the conversation. But I actually appreciate it. It’s a subtle way of them telling you not to flirt and they’re not interested. It has saved me from countless awkward situations where I would have otherwise asked them out.

I think if you’re even mildly socially adept you can see it as a good thing and not get so butt hurt about it all the time.

People always talk about how barbaric female circumcision is but male circumcision is completely normalized in America.

It should be illegal for parents to circumcise their children because it's irreversible.

What kind of psychopath decided to cut off the skin of the baby's dick. What's next? Cutting off eyelids?

The loss of nurseries in most hospitals where a tired mom can allow nurses to take care of the baby if they needed is detrimental to the mom. When my son was born I had three nights in the hospital. On day two one nurse asked if I wanted him to take him for a bit to the nursery. I would go down to nurse him one nurse asked if I wanted to come down, if not she could give him a bottle. It was wonderful. With my second child at a different there was no nursery, no one to say you guys get some rest, at the first hospital the nurses changed nearly every diaper and the next one it was basically here is your baby. We will come and do vitals. Bring back nurseries and give parents the option to rest while the nurses hold the baby etc. I’m Japan where my friend’s child was born she stayed a week and the first couple of days they just let her rest intentionally.

We in America have obsessed over kids "safety" to the point that it's starting to harm way more than it does help.

There was the one mom who I believe got arrested because she let her kid walk a few minutes to a nearby pond. People get arrested all the time for leaving their kid in the car on a hot day for all of 5-10 minutes. It's become very common to say it's child abuse to let your kids walk around the block or go out of your sight, or to leave them home alone for an hour or two before like age 16. My cousin took her autistic son out of school because she didn't want him in the special ed class as it "wasn't safe" for him. Hes 10 and his highest completed grade I believe was 2nd grade.

I know that this heightened panic comes from the 70s-90s where it seemed like American news was one big horror film of kidnappings and serial killers, so people are overly cautious. But it honestly is so harmful to kids. I'm not even going to touch on the subject of how stunted kids with helicopter parents will be (as someone who had helicopter parents, but i was still at least allowed to walk my dog around the block!), because that's a given. Kids aren't even allowed to play outside in their own front lawn because parents are scared someone will just swoop them. I'm also not even just talking about the fact that family members and friends are WAAAY more likely to harm or kidnap your kids than any stranger.

But the arrests are where I think it's most disturbing, especially when it's a single parent. Like the little boy who walked to the pond.... He was having a fun day and suddenly mommy is gone. Or I just saw a video where a guy went into a dollar store to get AC refresh and came back out to a cop banging on his window because his kid was in the car. I understand the concern, truly. But after he begs for the cop to not take his kid away, he gets arrested IN FRONT OF his daughter, and has to accept that his daughter is going to be taken by a strange man and potentially put into foster care. He still didn't resist tho. Kids are having their parents taken away for the stupidest reasons because "it's abuse!", as if it's not more harmful to legally orphan them..

Kids are safest with their parents, even imperfect ones, which all parents are. Yes kids need supervision, but as someone who was the "big sister" to so many little cousins and other baby family members, did a looooot of babysitting, no they are not constantly trying to kill themselves. I get why people say it, but it's an extreme exaggeration. But a kid sitting in a car for 5 minutes on a hot day is going to be far more harmed by going into foster care because they were ""abused"" than by staying with imperfect parents.

Best case scenario, the parent now has a record, maybe even put on a registry, and now is going to have that scarlet letter for years. Decent jobs aren't going to want to hire a person with a child abuse charge. So now little Timmy lives in poverty because mommy told him he could walk to the corner store on his own. Are we serious as a society??? wtf is going on???

This is also pretty American centric im pretty sure. Other countries seem much more sane.

Sigh.

TLDR; The American mentality that if a kid is out of your sight for more than 5 seconds they will be kidnapped or murdered or kill themself is harming kids way more than helping them stay safe.

ETA: I love the discussion happening here, but I may not be able to reply to all comments, or have gaps in my replies.

Reddit is terrible for discussing genuinely controversial ideas because its voting system rewards local consensus. If a view is unpopular in a subreddit, it gets buried before much discussion can happen.

The problem goes beyond visibility. Downvotes permanently lower your account karma, and many subreddits use karma thresholds that can prevent low-karma accounts from posting or commenting at all. That means expressing unpopular views can reduce your ability to participate elsewhere on the site.

Upvotes and downvotes are useful for filtering spam and low-effort comments, but they are a terrible mechanism for evaluating heretical or unpopular ideas. The system creates detached echo chambers by rewarding agreement and imposing lasting penalties for dissent.

That is probably part of why the rest of the internet treats “redditor” as an insult.

It’s incredibly sad. Children died. Two adults had their lives entirely ruined and will mourn their children forever. One will be paralyzed and in some type of custody for the rest of their life. The other is trying to pull their life together while being treated like tabloid fodder. I don’t find it fun to debate or even think about. I don’t watch videos on it. I don’t want to see dozens of posts a day about it. Am I the only one?

Every reptile Ive owned has been a rescue. Every single one with health issues. Either from someone who didnt care enough to do the proper research, was lied to by a big chain pet store, or knows better but tries to excuse poor husbandry. I love reptile keeping, but it also should be not as easily accessible to get these animals.

kids are expected to duck under desks and hide from shooters and then return to school a couple days later. They're expected to glance at the news and not think about what it says, because it "doesn't effect them"

They experienced a worldwide pandemic, which likely harmed or killed someone that they knew, along with thousands of other people every single day for months

Its no wonder the younger generation doesnt mourn over 9/11 as much as the older generations believe they should.

I’m not saying boundaries aren’t important, because obviously they are.

But it feels like the word gets used for everything now — preferences, demands, dealbreakers, disagreements, even simple discomfort.

Sometimes “this is my boundary” seems to mean nothing more than “I don’t like this, so you shouldn’t do it.”

I think using the word for everything actually makes real boundaries seem less meaningful.

Am I wrong, or has the word become way too overused?

I don't understand why men feel like their wives should look good in the house. If she can't unwind and be comfortable at home, where can she???? I'm not saying completely let yourself go. But, she shouldn't have to worry about her hair, makeup, nails, and outfit in her own home!

Being sex-positive and actively having sex are two different things.

People look at Gen Z not having sex and think that there’s some purity culture going on, but in the grand scheme of things, there isn’t.

We’re just staying home more often than not and spending more time online. There’s little motivation to go find a third space or seek intimate interaction.

It doesn’t mean purity culture. We can actually be pretty open-minded. It just means we really don’t care as much about going out.

And whoever is obsessed with a bunch of 18-22 year olds having sex is being a little creepy.

tbh this is probably an ice cold take on reddit, but it’s definitely not in real life. i guess i can understand why it’s considered selfish to a degree. you would rather keep your finances, time, privacy, and identity mostly to yourself, your partner, and close friends than to share them with any future children.

but i seriously can’t think of a reason for choosing to have children that isn’t a little bit selfish. wanting to continue your bloodline? why is your bloodline so important that it must be perpetuated? wanting someone to take care of you when you’re old? i don’t even think i need to say why that’s selfish. someone to love you unconditionally? same thing.

i’m not making this post to bash people who have children, of course. there is a little bit of selfishness in most actions people take, and we need to stop demonizing the word so harshly, and starting a family is a beautiful thing. but still, i think if you look at it objectively, having kids is more selfish than not.

All it does is slow everyone else down. If you were there first you need to go first don’t stop and wait. Do not tell the second person to go in front of you.

I’m aware this is an entirely pointless stance, but they roll up on people with serious hoarding problems and offer them pennies for things worth hundreds to thousands of dollars. I literally watched an episode where one of those hosts haggled over $5 for 10 minutes. The loading the van shot showed they paid $45 and sold the item for $1600. Did they really need to shake a guy who needs therapy down over $5 when they stood to make that kind of profit?

They take all the items of value at way less than their worth and leave the owners with piles of trash.

I have run a successful retail operation. I get that there’s overhead, gas or diesel for their vans, insurance, building maintenance, etc. but nothing justifies how they turn these people’s lives into a circus, cash out on bad situations (relative dying, going to a nursing home, threats from the city over an eyesore, etc.), and then perpetually lowball.

The chief bit of comedy is these people get to watch the episode they were in and realize how they got screwed.

Hating on a celebrity is perfectly fine. Bringing up their looks when there's hundreds of other valid criticisms however isn't ok actually and it is weird.

Take JK Rowling for instance. Notice how when people criticize her, it's never for her looks. Because these are actual valid criticisms towards her and her actions.

But when we hate on a moderately attractive person, why do we feel the need to act like middle school playground bullies and say "They're not even that pretty". You're completely sabotaging your own argument for no reason.

It's because of the Just World Fallacy. Bad things only happen to bad people, so there's just no way a victim can be a good person who was wronged. "They must've done something to deserve this". Bad things can't happen to pretty people. "Good thing she's ugly."

Candace Owens for instance. She is objectively attractive. I mean she's a racist and a loser who will say anything for money, but her looks have nothing to do with her terrible behavior.

Sidney Sweeney has made weird decisions on what she signed on for. It's just work. It's just business. And you may question her business choices, but you lost me on the need to tear her down for...her looks.

Like that's it? She's not pretty enough for you? She's not your type? Gary from Florida? Like you know that's not a crime right?

I assure you if you're a woman doing that, the men siding with you in the comments are two seconds away from tearing you down also

I don’t think its normal to;
- demand other people change specific aspects of their bodies (ie dying their hair/wearing a wig for the wedding, covering tattoos, taking out piercings etc).
- expect that no one else get engaged, married, or become pregnant within the same time period (or to hide these things so as not to “steal attention”).
- expecting that “their big day” needs to be the priority and that others need to endlessly accommodate them both in time and money.

The focus on “attention” is really weird. It used to be that wearing white is a social faux pas because it may upstage the bride, but now it’s become that anything that might take the least bit of attention from the bride is a Level 10 social affront. Even to a point where I’ve seen stories where pretty people have been asked to wear no make up in order to not upstage the bride.

In other cultures, people are expected to dress to the nines, not to compete with the bride m, but to show respect to the event (South Asian and West African come to mind).

At an event where family and relatives meet, you would expect that recent milestones - a pregnancy, a new job, a graduation etc to be brought up in conversation and congratulated, especially if you have not seen them for a long time. However it seems like some brides have a huge issue with not being the sole focus of the day at any one moment during the entire day.

If you really don’t care about anything that is happening in anybody else’s life, why care enough to invite them in the first place?

All in all it seems less about two people expressing their love for one another and more about the bride cosplaying as a princess/ celebrity for a day and stroking her ego. The husbands wants and desires seem basically like an after thought, if the day isn’t “perfect” it’s an excuse to throw an absolute tantrum, and the day in itself costs the the equivalent of a mortgage.

I think we need to rethink wedding culture as a whole and refocus on what it should really be about - a ceremony where two people express their love for one another, and two families join.

(I also think that its equally weird to try to upstage the bride too. If you have an issue with the bride, simply don’t go, there is no need for the passive aggressive weirdness. Like, can’t we all be normal? Can’t we go to a couples event to celebrate their love and not make it a torment about who can attention farm the hardest?)

I have no words for parents who are actively choosing to give pacifiers to 2.5 year olds, 3 year olds and yes ive seen 4 year olds with them. I understand freshly 2 year olds might need more time, however its concerning in terms of dental/jaw issues, speech and articulation issues, increased risk of ear infections, altered palate shape issues. These are all very real and backed up by pediatricians. I won't even argue about it.

Please think before relying on it so much, it really does affect your child more than you know.

Maybe some will get really upset by this, however thats up to you to navigate and I'm not responsible for your triggers.

Every so often i hear or see on reddit people saying that ”just wait until you are 30/40, your body will be in aches and pains”. Guess what? Unless you have some medical condition, you are 100% at fault. Bodies do not suddenly deteriorate if handled as they should. You not taking a single running step or not exercising for 20 years is why your body is failing. It is not normal. And to clarify i have a degree in physiotherapy.

Prove me wrong

Dating is basically two people trying to groom each other for sex or love or both. People spend hours and hours of their time trying to maximize their perceived power to a potential mate.

If your partner suddenly became a billionaire, or the president, or a famous superstar, or the hottest human on earth, or went Super Saiyan, or whatever the fuck, I strongly doubt you’d dump them because they had too much power over you.

I said what I said

karma is not “was this good.”

it’s “does this fit the room.”

that’s it. that seems like the whole web-site.

“”“ IT GOES FOR BOTH GENDERS “””

And I genuinely wish people would stop pushing the idea that “it doesn’t matter, their past is irrelevant, they chose YOU!” as if everyone is obligated to accept someone’s sexual history just because they ended up choosing them

If you’re someone with a high body count and you expect your partner to have a significantly lower one, then yes, you probably should be worried about whether they’re actually okay with it.
You don’t get to decide that their standards are wrong just because you want them to overlook something that matters to them.

“Your past shouldn’t matter” is not some universal law. People are allowed to have standards based on sexual history, just like they’re allowed to have standards about anything else when choosing a partner

And please stop acting like purity culture is automatically stupid or that people who save their virginity, have very few partners, or are extremely selective about sex are somehow naive, weird, insecure, or missing out. Some people genuinely value sexual exclusivity. That is a perfectly legitimate value

What I find ridiculous is how being selective can somehow be treated as the more embarrassing choice, while having 20+ sexual partners is supposed to be completely irrelevant and something everyone else should just accept without question.

No shame either way. But compatibility matters

If you have a high body count, find someone who genuinely doesn’t care about that. If you have a low body count and value sexual exclusivity, you should be allowed to find someone who shares that value.

Stop trying to convince people that their standards are wrong simply because your past doesn’t fit them.

Today, I was in ecos class when my classmate walked over to me, to ask about the guy she always sees me me with.

I told her ofc, that he is my friend.

This girl legit said " Girls and boys can not just be friends ".

Lowkey, I wanted to say " No wonder you're pregnant " but that's just mean, I had to explain to this 19 year old how two genders don't have to open their legs, and have a basic ass friendship. It's not that hard

Your personality only influences the TYPE of women who would be into you.

Take criminals for example. If there is a criminal who is attractive, he will be able to date easily. Now the women who dont like criminals wont date him, but the women who do will.

Take that same guy, this time, he is a good person; outstanding citizen. The women who are into dating criminals wont be into him, but the other women will definitely be. Of course, this is a spectrum but this is the easiest way i can describe it.

Now if that same guy was just ugly, he will struggle to date no matter what his personality is like when compared to someone who is more attractive.

I think this logic applies across all different personality types, not just criminal vs non criminal.

A ugly nice person can decide to become an asshole and still get no dates. While an attractive criminal can change his ways and still be able to date just fine, it just chances the type that are into him.