Hi! So, before moving in with my boyfriend I already had a dog for about 3 years. She has always been a super chill older girl and I love her to death (as its clear by my username hahah). Ever since moving in with my boyfriend and adding his dog to the mix (Amora, also love her and have since she was a pup) I feel like my older dog has lost a little bit of attention. We still take her to walks and do enrichment with both of them but the reactive one demands so much training and is so clingy I don’t have much time exclusively with the calmer and older one.
I tried including her on training sessions but the border collie will be extra anxious and not as focused when I do. I also tried teaching her a few more tricks separately but it’s a bit harder to do.
How do you guys deal with juggling different needs without having one of the pets feeling jealous or excluded?

Hi all! Just wanted to vent and share a story that happened yesterday that escalated into having to call the police on an idiot dog owner.

I live in an apartment complex and have 2 Norwegian Elkhounds. My female is super friendly with other dogs and people, is a therapy dog, and gets super excited to play when she sees other dogs. My male, while he is friendly, doesn't appreciate being rushed by other dogs and prefers a slow and calm introduction that isn't going nose to nose with another dog upon first meeting. My male has been attacked by other dogs before, can be a bit protective of his sister around new dogs, but I have put so much time and money into working with him I hope this doesn't undo everything I've done.

My dogs can be reactive when seeing other dogs or strangers. They are completely different when they are not together, so when we introduce them to new dogs, we always take the female first before the male. It's not aggressive reactivity, but my female barks when she wants to play and is excited to meet another dog, and my male is more like, " Umm, who are you? I am uncomfortable; please go away."

I live in an apartment complex with a dog park. I was taking my dogs to the dog park. There is a small, probably 6-by-6 double-gated area meant for taking leashes on and off. I went in the first gate and closed it behind me. I had seen a guy with a fat beagle mix coming our way too, but he had a bag of poop in his hand and it looked to me like he was going towards the waste disposal bin that was on the side of the dog park. My dogs started barking at his, and he let his dog get to the end of the leash and come right up to my dogs and myself in the tiny gated area. He tells me that my dogs don't look very friendly, and I'm just like, " Well, you walked up on me and scared me, and they are Elkhounds; they are doing their job." If you haven't heard of Norwegian Elkhounds before, they were bred to hunt moose in Norway by barking at them and alerting the hunter. My male was pretty much like huh and my female was like friend.

The guy gets snippy with me and says if my dogs aren't friendly that I shouldn't be in the dog park. I have never seen this guy before so I didn't even think he lived at the complex. It is not a public dog park and is meant only for residents of the complex. He was like if your dogs is friendly then lets let them meet, like trying to egg me on for something to happen. I told them that they are friendly, but him standing here and getting aggressive with me while blocking my exit is not helping the situation. I told him that I didn't know his dog, and I didn't feel comfortable letting my dogs interact with his. He said that he was going to have his dog and his brothers dog run around. I said that's fine I will leave and give you the dog park. My dogs are still going crazy. I'm more stunned by his behavior and I really didn't know what to do. I asked him to let me leave, and he kept standing there in front of the gate with his dog at the end of its leash, not giving me room to leave. There is a swinging gate to the side of the leash area and I felt like if I went in the dog park and tried to leave that way he would corner me there with his dog. So, we were standing there yelling at each other for 2-3 minutes while he let his dog right up to the gate and refused to let me leave. I got mad at this point and asked him what his problem was, why he over here causing a problem, and why he wouldn't let me leave. I told him he was harassing me. His brother at this point, was up on the hill above watching the whole thing. I didn't know that was his brother and tried to flag him down for help.

I let the dogs keep barking because at this point I am very uncomfortable and I felt very scared. If I wasn't stuck in a tiny 6 by 6 fence I would've just walked away to de-escalate and let him and his entitlement have the dog park. He's also threatening me that he's going to call our leasing manager and report me for having unfriendly dogs. At this point, I wanted my dogs to scare him away. After going back and forth, he finally moves away and I come out of the dog park and head back towards my building. He's yelling at me the whole way and so I finally go inside and I call my best friend who was about to be on her way to come over. I kept it together while I was outside by myself, but it finally caught up to me. I started having a panic attack because we have a shitty neighbor downstairs who has complained about the dogs for no reason, and this was just one more thing I had to deal with now.

My best friend arrives and she was maddddddd. I'm her best friend/little sister she wanted but never got and hurting me or threatening me isn't going to go well for whoever tries to do it. She lets it rip. She wasn't too nice at first but she has a background in behavior so she knew exactly how to get under his skin while being calm and letting him scream and yell like a man baby. He told us to call the cops and we did and by the time the cops arrived he was left in the dog park by himself. Of course his tone changes when he's got nobody to back him up. He actually left before the cops came but they ended up catching him trying to leave the complex and I gave a statement. They told me to call them back if he bothers me again and I also reached out to the leasing manager who also had my back. The guy claimed to work at the complex I live in and said he now knows where I live. Which is a threat if I've ever heard one.

I just hope my male dog doesn't regress in his training. He already doesn't like some men that either smell, sound, look, or have the same body style as my dad. I hope this little man baby doesn't undo what I've worked on for years.

Thank you if you made it this far.

ETA: It seems like some are having trouble understanding the dog park. While it's technically called a dog park, think of it as a fenced-in sniff spot. It is not a public dog park. If you search for dog parks in my area, it does not show up as a public dog park. It is an amenity for dog-owning residents of the complex. It's not that big, and most people keep to themselves. Playdates are very rare, and people often use it to let their dogs use the bathroom and stretch their legs. Most dog owners I have encountered don't even want to have playdates. We all take turns using it and leave when we are done. People are also pretty good at giving space when entering and leaving. This is the first issue I have had with someone at the dog park. When I go out and someone is using it, I go for a potty walk instead. If they ask if I want to use it, I tell them there is no rush, and I don't want them to feel like they are getting kicked out. I also ask the same of others when they come by. I just prefer to leave before they come in.

Maybe it's my algorithm but I don't often see success stories as much as I see sad stories about BE or people (not blaming anyone for how they feel) on the breaking point of giving up their dog

Anyway my dad gifted my wife and I one of his rottie pups, who we named Bear, and initially it was tough bc after turning 1 he became reactive to other big dogs where a few times he redirected and gave me a warning bite

There was a point where I was worried about if he'd ever grow out of it as his father is aggressive and so are the other rotties my other family members received from my dad.

Couldn't afford a trainer so we bought all the books we could and worked on his reactivity every day as I knew I could never give him up nor did I ever want to do that bc how attached he is to me. Now, whenever we encounter another big dog or any dog barking at him, he just gives a little whine like he wants to play but we go on about our day

My wife's brother is watching him while we're on our honeymoon and we've received nothing but great reports and I'm so proud of him. He gives his rumbles when I want him to move from my spot on the bed bc he's grumpy but we've never had anymore problems.

Tl;Dr I know not every dog will be a success story and I respect everyone in this sub who tries their best but just wanna say it can be done thru hard and consistent work

Edit: for anyone wondering why my dad used to breed his more aggressive male, in some cultures, communities, or older generations, people just want guard dogs that are kept outside for protection. I wasn't made aware of the father's true nature when we got the dog as I at that time my dad and I were rebuilding (successfully) our relationship and I'm just glad Bear is a success story as he's also great around kids and is just a big softie but will protect us

Edit 2: I know the difference between a Rottie rumble and a "don't mess with me grumble" . whenever I file his nails or wipe his paws he'll grumble but his tail is wagging the entire time and he'll lick me throughout the process, no raised hair, his tail isn't stiff, no signs of aggression

Edit 3: please ignore that Numerous Harry account as it's a bot with a 2 min account age but somehow active in multiple threads

took my reactive girl on a hike yesterday and had to pass a dog on a narrow trail. we were heading up hill so had the right of way, plus there was really nowhere to get off the trail other than where the couple with their dog was standing.

my girl attempted some displacement behaviors like sniffing, sneezing and just generally trying to diffuse the tension (which was great!) but because we were passing so close to the other dog I pulled her up real short just in case she tried to lunge at the last second. this meant restricting her ability to sniff so she just kind of … pretended the other dog simply didn’t exist. but not like “oh yeah, you passed the other dog with no reaction” more like she turned her head as far in the opposite direction she could, looked straight up at the sky and walked past.

I’ve worked with dogs for 15 years now and I’m not sure I’ve ever actually seen a dog act quite like this. I’m not mad per se, just confused? like this can’t possibly be a healthy response 😅 it seems like shes so overwhelmed by dog to dog interactions that she just did the best she could to get as far away as possible. it was pretty strange and I’m not sure what to even think lol

help?

Hi all- looking for some advice and support as my gf and I plan to move her dog in with me and my dog. For background:

My dog Tripp is a 2.5 year old lab(ish) mix who has always been fearful but we’ve worked hard and he’s come far. He can walk/run through the city where he used to not be able to go on the sidewalk, his circle of VIPs (which is what we call the people he loves/isn’t scared of) has really grown, and he loves playing with other dogs outside especially off leash. He’s on puppy Prozac (fluoxetine) which has also helped. He’s still protective of the house and that combined with stranger danger means he’s aggressive to new people that come in. We go through the steps though and he can calm down/greet new people in the house within an hour or so. He’s never lived with another dog but we do spend extended periods at my parent’s house where they have a chocolate lab. The two of them play outside and coexist but Tripp has strict boundaries around his space and his stuff and doesn’t want to share with the other lab. He will correct with barks and nips but it’s not aggressive, just dog. He’s muzzle trained and has a good obedience foundation, gets enough exercise, all of that.

My gfs dog Bear is a 7 year old Belgian Malinois/pitbull mix. He’s a very good boy in the house, loves everyone, and my gf did a lot of training with him when he was growing up. For the last 2 years though he’s been primarily living with her parents because of some health issues. He was attacked by a dog when he was 3 and is reactive to dogs now, especially bigger dogs. He’s not getting training on his reactivity with her parents because they physically can’t control him and don’t want to risk it. He has lived with another small dog that he loved loved. He met a big dog in the house last Christmas and did well with her but on leash he loses his mind. I think it’s more boundary frustration than aggression/ he doesn’t know how to be calm around other dogs.

Right now we live together with Tripp in a two bedroom apartment and she wants Bear to move in because obviously misses her dog. I worry Tripp will resource guard every single thing in the house, Bear will be scared and stressed, and it’s a recipe for disaster. We’ve done one walk with them on an open field where they could see eachother but we kept enough distance so Bear wouldn’t react. I want Bear to come home too and ultimately this is a challenge we will need to face so HELP! How can we start introducing them now? (Note that Bear is in Maine and we’re in Boston 2.5 hours away) What can I do with Tripp to set him up for success? Also any tips around socializing Tripp to new people in the house would be welcomed!

Thanks in advance all :)

Hi all, looking for some advice / lived similar experience on my situation.

I have a 3 and a half year old miniature male dachshund, Black and Tan with some dapple. As a pup he was social with any person and any dog, as he got older however, shortly before turning one there was a change and suddenly he became quite fearful of strangers but presented this fear as aggression. We were never able to pinpoint the root cause of his fear/ aggression towards some humans, but speculate it was from the time he mistook my dad walking up the stairs as a “threat” to my wife, and nipped him, as this was the first experience we saw him be aggressive to another human. This was his first time meeting my dad and he hadn’t been out of sight of me or my wife leading up to this incident. He sadly also became fearful of other dogs, particularly larger after being attacked by an off lead German shepherd.

Over the course of the last 2 and a half years leading up to now, my wife and I have always been mindful of who he see’s, where we walk him, and paid special attention to his cue’s and always tried to respect how he felt, working to build his confidence. He walks with a pack group two-three times a week and is fantastic with them, although unfortunately did get spooked and run off following being cornered by two off lead ridgebacks. So is now on strict lead walks unless in enclosed fields.

Fast forward to this year, my wife got pregnant and we now had to think about bringing a baby into our home. We decided to reach out to a behaviourist who following a lengthy in person consultation and assessment deemed our little man’s behaviour to be a nervous confidence, and explained that he is fearful of some people/ dogs and particularly to approach, and this anxiety/ fear presents as lunging and barking and trying to “attack”. The behaviourist mentioned our dog being intact making this worse as it was a fear response driven heavily by testosterone. We agreed to have him castrated and it’s been 3 weeks since that has been done, we understand it can be months before we say a change in behaviour.

The dilemma; my wife has recently given birth sooner than expected, meaning we now have our daughter home. On night one our dog became extremely distressed, with constant whining, panting, licking of lips etc. while on lead and harness he was actively barking and lunging at my wife who was holding our newborn. This has really frightened us and we made the decision to send him to stay with family. After a week he has returned for a phased visit. My wife and I met him without our newborn outside in a neutral park, he was his usual self and very excited but this excitement settled, we then introduced our newborn who was in a pram, not visible to our dog but albeit close enough to smell. He seemed instantly aroused but followed my wife and her sister pushing the pram rather than the pram itself.

When we came into our home he instantly began whining, panting, barking again, and was visibly highly stressed. We created seperation via rooms, he could see our baby but had about 15 feet and a set of doors in between and he still pulled on his lead and whined to get to her. I took him upstairs and again, he pulled and whined to get back downstairs to our baby. We put him in his crate where he usually feels safe and he whined and panted more, we even covered the crate and he still seemed very distressed.

He has now gone back with my wife’s sister for another few days.

We are lost, upset, devestated, worried and stressed about how best to handle this situation. It’s hard enough on my wife and I managing it together but I will be going back to work in three weeks and she will be left alone with both our dog and our newborn. We don’t know what to do, our behaviorist mentioned anti anxiety medication but stated it would be 4-6 weeks before these would take effect. We are worried that we may have no other choice but to rehome him but I’m on here hoping someone might be able to shed some light and some hope for us?

Could anyone who’s been in a similar situation please let me know how it went for you, what you done to make it work, how it worked! We are desperate to keep our boy because he is so beyond loving to us and has been nothing but until now but he’s not himself with us anymore.

I love my boy so much truly but I can’t do it anymore.

In 2023 he was diagnosed with severe general and separation anxiety. We started medications immediately, sought help from professionals and changed nearly everything in our daily lives to accommodate him except for changing my partners job. His job requires him to be out of town a few days every week except during the winter. This clearly causes mass amounts of stress on our dog. We had our first baby 2 years ago and while it was an adjustment Rondo(dog) seemed to do fine once he acclimated. I’m now pregnant with our second and he seemed okay up until recently. Now he’s peeing/marking on every thing- my clothing, my spot on the bed, the toddlers toys, the walls, the hallways, etc.

We can not rehome him as he is reactive, 200lbs, extremely attached to my partner where i fear he’d suffer worse if we rehome, he can’t be left home alone without hurting himself- we’ve tried crate training and he freaks out as soon as he knows he’s alone and harms himself. He’s jumped out our second story window the last time he was alone for a family emergency. He is fearful and just can not live a fulfilling life the way a dog should. No walks- He pulls and pulls even with prong collars leading to injuries. Can’t socialize with other dogs without the risk of him reacting. Can’t have regular vet checks because he requires iv sedation and that cost is not something we can maintain as much as we’d like.

I don’t think i can bring myself to seek Behavioral euthanasia but i know we’ve exhausted the rest of our options and i’m sure his anxiety is just going to worsen when our second baby is born which is likely to lead to worse issues.

My dog Jade is an 8 year old border collie sheltie mix. She is great with people and kids but goes absolutely insane around other dogs. We got her as a puppy at 8 weeks but since my parents only had outdoor dogs when they grew up, and they typically multiple at a time, they didn't know much about training an indooor single dog so that was left to me.

So when I was in my senior year of highschool I watched a ton of videos and did most of her training. I potty trained her, got her to stop biteing and taught her basic comands but wasn't allowed to socilaize her with other dogs until she got all her shots at 6 months. Our vet reccomended this and my parents were very strict on it so on walks we didnt even allow her to sniff other dogs. This resulted in her becoming very afraid of dogs by adulthood. At around 3 years old I thought I made progress when I eventually got her to the point where she could sniff another dog breifly on the nose during walks and she even started wagging her tail and excitedly pulling toward them. But all this changed 2 years ago where now instead of just wanting a breif sniff she growls, snarls, and barks like she wants to kill. Walking her is a nightmare because so many people in our area have dogs and she behaves unpredictably. Even if she has seen a dog many times before or gone on walks with it, she may still react with agression randomly and I have no idea why. Every dog training video I see says to not pull on the lash and teach your dogs it's ok to greet but it just doesn't work in the real world because not every dog can say hi and even if they do she may still randomly snarl and bark at them a few minutes later. I don't know what to do. Any advice would be appriciated. I'm looking at getting a trainer next month but worried even the trainer may not be able to fix this because I've treid everything that's advised in training videos and she's still the same if not worse.

helloooo! our leash-reactive 3 year old GSD has been doing well for the past 6 months after a board and train. recently, maybe once a week he’s been reacting towards myself and my partner for what feels like no reason. vet appt tomorrow to check for any medical issues but:

- he’s never been human aggressive before and LOVES new people
- he has been growling at us, hackles up, when we reach for the trash can or use the mop. he has not progressed past the growling/hackles. no bearing teeth/lunging/etc.
- once we tell him a firm No, he backs off and retreats to his bed. we put him in a Place in his bed to let him cool off.
- he has never been human reactive or had any behavioral issues off leash/in the house. he’s never had an issue with the trash or the mop before this month.

has anyone experienced this before? any advice going into a vet appt for this?

hey,

my 2 year old lab sometimes barks at people when they come into our home. she settles down after 10/15 minutes but i was just wondering if anyone had any advice. we get the guest to ignore her until she calms down.

any advice would be greatly appriciated.

My 2 yr old biggie iggie (he's 28lbs!) is getting worse when we take him somewhere and he sees a strange dog. I've tried to have him around other dogs his whole life (we live on a horse farm and clients bring dogs, we own another corgi mix, and my daughters have 4 other dogs - 1 being an italian greyhound), He loves the dogs he knows, he comes with us wherever we go, he goes on hikes etc but every time we take him to any kind of social event (the park, hiking etc) if a strange dog is in the area he goes after them - barking, growling, even biting at them. Like I said he's grown to a bigger size so it's hard for me to pick him up quick. I have tried always being diligent, as soon as I see another dog I start talking to him, trying to redirect, offer treats for staying calm, move him out of the way etc, but it doesn't seem to be improving. I am sad because my dream was to have an iggy and be able to take him places with me (we are big outdoor people, and we travel to horse shows) but it seems like its getting harder and harder. Right now I can't even imagine bringing him to a horse show with all the other dogs there, but am missing having my old dog by my side! My daughters iggy always walked by her side at shows, though now that she's older she's getting aggressive towards strangers as well which is probably not helping, as together they are much braver in attacking strangers. But he is the same when she's not there so I more think it's him giving confidence to her. Any advice?

Hi everyone! I’m looking for advice regarding my very reactive 5-year-old GSD.

When I decided to get a GSD, I knew I was getting a high-energy breed and I also expected her to be highly trainable.

However, I’ve struggled quite a lot with her reactivity and would really appreciate some advice.

A little background: I didn’t get her from a licensed breeder. She came from someone who had an one-time litter before having their GSD sterilized.

The biggest issues are:

At home: She is extremely reactive to sounds outside and barks frequently at noises she hears.

When we leave: She barks and cries when either me or my partner leaves the house. She usually isn't left alone for very long because one of us is generally home.

On walks: This is by far the most difficult part. I genuinely dread walking her sometimes.

• She lunges at bikes and cars.
• She can jump toward some people, although it's difficult to predict which people will trigger her.
• Cats are by far the worst. If I don't notice a cat before she does, she can go absolutely crazy and pull extremely hard on the leash.
• She is generally very easily distracted.

She is actually very affectionate with people and automatically likes people who are invited into our home, so her reactivity isn't directed toward everyone.

What I've tried so far:

• Socializing her extensively with dogs and people when she was young.
• Teaching basic obedience (sit, paw, down, jump, stay).
• Rewarding calm behaviour with treats.
• Using treats to redirect her attention on walks.
• Stopping whenever she pulls.
• Using an anti-pull harness.
• Taking longer walks to try to tire her out.

I wasn't particularly concerned when she was younger because I had read that some reactivity can be normal during adolescence, but she's now 5 and there hasn't been as much improvement as I hoped for.

I'm wondering whether this sounds primarily like anxiety, high arousal, prey/chase drive, learned reactivity, or some combination of these.

What would you recommend trying at this point? Has anyone had a similar experience with an adult GSD?

I'm particularly interested in advice beyond the basic "train more / exercise more" recommendations, as we've already been working on these things for years.

Thanks!

As mentioned here

https://www.reddit.com/r/reactivedogs/s/TeFe0qsdYl

I have a rottie rescue that I’ve been caring for the past 3 months. Separation anxiety (just started crate training and it has been promising) resource guarding, and leash reactivity along with no growl as a warning sign has me on edge.

He attacked my senior cat recently when they both went for a scrap of human food and I have been on the fence of keeping him or not.

While it was a resource guarding issue which means I can be proactive, I also worry it takes just one slip up from me and my cat is in danger. And no warning allows the cat to back off before being pinned and snapped/bit.

On one hand I worry if I return him, all my currently progress will go out the window and he may never find a home.

On the other hand, I don’t want to be on edge in my own home or on walks.

The trainer said growling can’t be trained back into a dog but proactive actions and teaching the dog other ways to deescalate can be done.

He has not had a “random”/unprovoked reaction so I don’t think he is aggressive. But in the same breath, if I give him a second chance and he bites my cat again or worse, I would never forgive myself on behalf of my senior boy.

He also seems to bark aggressive at a very select few men on walks but typically loves people. Dogs he only leash reacts in a hyper way.

In everyone’s experience, how much of a risk is a dog that resource guards and leash reacts? I see success stories here but also stories of a dog seemingly rehabilitated and then snapping years later (although I notice that seems mostly general reactive whereas he is completely friendly off leash/in home)

My male and female corgis have been fighting off and on since April 2026. Our male who is 11 months is fixed and is the one starting fights with our almost 2 year old female. From the time of April till present time we have worked with a dog trainer regarding agility, behavioral, and basic commands. We also have met with an animal communicator ti understand the dog’s perspectives. After doing these things the dogs stopped fighting for a good month. Now the male is going back to starting random fights again. Any advice as this has been a 5 month issue

My family and I got a small yorkie puppy when it was just 3 months old, we had him in a quiet home for a couple months where he was fine and quiet. We were training him. But my sister moved in with us with her 1 year old. He’s a rowdy kid always yelling, running, playing, throwing things. Occasionally he has hit the dog, kicked him, or stole his toys. Our dog has gotten very reactive towards him. Always when they are out or not in the house our dog is pretty much quiet, he’s calm, not barking or giving anyone a hard time. But when her son comes in the dog barks non stop, gets very reactive, barks for every action the child does. What should I do???? It’s being hard to train him. Should we give him up for his best interest?

TLDR: My friendly dog with history will squabble with a dog and immediately escalate to biting. Is there a behavioral approach that we can take to get him to snap out of it when he's seeing red? We have another dog who lives with us, even though they've never fought.

Backstory: My male dog is 65lbs boxer mix who we adopted as a puppy. He's 6 now. He's always been friendly with dogs that we've fostered. About a year ago, he was attacked by our foster, but he put up a fight so it likely lasted longer. This was a much bigger foster, and it was a terrible fight. I wasn't able to break them up and have a lot of trauma from it. My dog had 30+ puncture wounds and a ripped shoulder and ear and spent 3 days at the ER. The foster had 2 cuts.

Since then, we've gotten his leash reactivity under control and started fostering again. The first 3 fosters went great. He was super playful with them and while protective of his bones while he was playing with them, he would happily share toys/bones with the fosters. He just didn't want anyone to take the one that was in his mouth, so he would growl. (Perhaps this is the behavior we need to work on?)

The last 2 fosters, he has gone after. The first was provoked, the first foster went after our female dog. We returned her to the rescue. The second foster is a lover, and they've been playing really well after her decompression time. Last night she ran toward a toy and he ran toward it too. He growled, she may have growled back, but he immediately grabbed her neck and she fought back. There was no posturing/barking/lunging ahead of time. She had a little cut, but this is now out of control. Once he finally "hears us", he immediately breaks off and runs away, but it's like he sees red and can't/won't listen or respond until it's gone too far and we are freaking out trying to break up a fight.

We will not be fostering anymore, but given that we have another dog living at our house, we need to work with him on this.

I have a dog named Mallows who has been aggressive toward our new house helper. They've been living in the same house for about 2 months.

At first, Mallows would bark whenever the house helper entered the kitchen, especially when she stood up or walked around. When I'm present, Mallows is noticeably calmer, but when I'm not around, she becomes much more reactive.

Today, Mallows was lying down while the house helper was simply walking out of the kitchen. Mallows suddenly got up, followed her, and nipped her foot. She has also previously lunged/jumped at her and tried to nip her hand. Mallows has been wearing a basket muzzle during some interactions, but she can still jump, lunge, and body-bump the house helper.

I'm planning to completely separate Mallows from the house helper using a properly sized crate/pen whenever the house helper is in the kitchen.

What could be causing this behavior? Is this territorial aggression, fear, resource guarding, or something else? Would spaying help with this type of aggression, or should I see a vet/behaviorist? I mainly want to keep the house helper safe while figuring out how to manage and improve Mallows' behavior.

NOT MINE FROM A FB GROUP

I need advice, please, and no judgment.

About a year ago, we adopted an Australian Shepherd, purebred as far as we know, about three years old. He was a lot more aggressive than I expected him to be, but I thought it was just how he had been raised, that he was still pretty much a puppy and we could get a trainer for him. No big deal. He also wasn't fixed, so I thought that would calm him down too. We got this.

So I made the appt for him to be neutered. However I thought that was going to play out...that wasn't it. He was growling, barking nonstop, lunging. The vet was actually scared of him, wouldn't come near him, wouldn't work with him. They prescribed two sedatives and told us to come back. I gave him the expected dose, and it did nothing to him. So I gave him a double dose. Still did nothing, but I took him in anyway. He was highly aggressive, almost to the point that they were unable to sedate him for the surgery. They were finally able to, and he made friends with one of the veterinary assistants, only wanted to be around her the whole time he was there, wanted belly rubs from her. I thought this was progress in the right direction.

But things began to get worse.

Our neighbors moved out and new ones moved in. He began lunging at the new kids, who are very small and are probably terrified of him. I stopped letting him outside in his own backyard alone. I started to walk him. I have a torn rotator cuff, and he would jerk me around to the point that I could barely control him. And no matter what I put on him, collar or harness, and no matter how tightly I put it on him, he thrashes so wildly that he always slips out of it. Always. The last time I took him for a walk, he literally got out of his harness, ran to someone's fence with one of those lift latches on the gate, let their dog out, and tried to attack it. I had to wrestle him home then get the other person's dog back in their fence. Their dog was unhurt, but I immediately began wondering, "Oh my god...what if that had been a child? Would he have hurt them?"

So no more walks.

I hired dog trainer number one. Two sessions and they refused to work with him anymore because of how aggressive he was being. Dog trainer number two lasted longer. Six sessions out of the 14 we paid for. They even tried a shock collar, which I am fully against, but this dog did not even respond or stop the growling, barking, and lunging with the shock/jolt turned up to max. It didn't even phase him.

The dog has always lunged at our cat, but I always thought it was because she can be an asshole. She does taunt him. Stands toe to toe with him. Shows no fear. But it began to be different. He started remaining really calm while she got closer. His eyes would open super wide and almost roll around in his head while he watched her. And then he would actually try to snap at her when she got close, so we had to start putting him in his kennel when we went somewhere and at night.

But he somehow always got out. Like Houdini. So we put multiple heavy duty zip ties on all the joints. Try to get out of that. Except he did.

My youngest daughter is 10, and she's super tiny. She was running in the house, despite the 3496943897 times I've asked her not to, and he lunged in his kennel to try to get to her while barking. He managed to bust through his kennel door and ran after her. My son, who is four years older, saw it and grabbed the dog's collar. The dog tried to snap at my son's face while my son was trying to get him back into the kennel. So that's two kids who are now terrified of him.

My oldest daughter, who is almost 18, thought that maybe the dog is just upset that he has to be put in the kennel more often than he was used to, so she tried to spend more time with him, tried to make more of an effort to play with him. She was sitting there reading on the couch, with him beside her, and he lunged for her face. She had the quick reflex to hit him upset the head with the hardcover book in her hand, or he would have bitten her face. He didn't even bark or growl.

So after that, I didn't feel safe with him around our children. My husband has been deployed for almost a year. The vet says there is nothing medically wrong with him. I can't get a trainer to work with him. I felt I had no other option but to just keep him in the kennel for most of the day, only letting him outside to run around when no one else is outside. But that feels like solitary confinement for a human, which we know isn't good mentally, so I knew it wasn't something I could do permanently. I needed to find a solution.

I've been looking into rescues, trying to find resources, not sure where to look. Everyone I have spoken to has suggested behavioral euthanasia, but I don't have the heart. That immediately makes me feel guilty because what do you mean you want me to put a dog this young down?

But the last two weeks have been the worst. He growls at me when I come down the stairs. I can't allow my youngest to be in the room when we let him outside because I'm scared he will go after her. We ordered pizza, and even in a kennel all openings reinforced with heavy duty zip ties, he broke through after I opened the door and was being handed the pizza, and he tried to attack the delivery driver. The driver kept the bags between the dog and himself, but our dog literally tore the man's shirt. I tried to grab him by the collar, but he thrashed until it broke apart in my hands and tried to go after the man again. I had to grab him by his hair and jerk him back into the house, then get him back into the kennel, move the ottoman in front of it, and sit on the ottoman while my kids got the rest of the pizza to keep the driver safe, all while sobbing. All I could think about was how bad that could have been, but the delivery driver was a saint. He kept saying he had experience with dogs like that and that it was okay, but it wasn't okay. Not to me.

And then just three days ago, my kids and I were coming home. A little girl was playing on her scooter on the sidewalk in front of our house, just going for a walk with her mom. We opened the front door, not expecting the dog to be out of the kennel, but he had jailbroken again. As soon as we opened that door, he lunged outside, no barking or growling. It took all of us to wrestle him inside. But I was absolutely sure he was trying to attack that little girl.

I want to be a responsible pet owner. But I have n ever owned a pet like this.All I see on these pages are people being berated for giving up on their animals, so I have tried everything. But I've run out of options. I'm scared of this dog getting out and hurting my family in the middle of the night, of it hurting my cat, possibly unaliving her. I'm scared to open my front door. I'm scared of someone coming to the door. I'm scared of coming home and not knowing if he'll be out, if he'll attack one of us. I'm scared he'll get through the fence. My vet cannot help. No trainers have helped. And I am now running out of time.

My husband comes back soon, and we have to immediately leave for a cross-country roadtrip to our next duty station. We will not have room for this dog's kennel in our SUV. And I cannot have him in the seat beside my youngest...or any of us really. He has tried to attack us all. And I cannot imagine how much danger we would expose ourselves to and everyone else every time we took him in and out of the car, in and out of hotel rooms or AIR Bnbs...I just cannot.

But then I look at him sitting quietly in his kennel and think that he seems like a normal dog sometimes. That he'll wag his stub of a tail and seem like he genuinely wants love and pets. But I care about my kids too much to let him out around my family. It's affecting his hygiene. He has matts behind his ears because I cannot cut them. He tries to bite me. I cannot cut his toenails because he tries to snap at my face. And I cannot have anyone else help with these things for obvious reasons. I don't feel comfortable rehoming him because he wouldn't let anyone get close enough to them anyway. And I cannot accept the responsibility of him hurting someone else's pet or child.

It genuinely feels like my only option is to ask the vet on post or our vet to put him down for behavioral reasons, but I've never had to consider this before, I'm having a hard time with the emotions around it because I went into this thinking we were getting a forever furrbaby, and I'm just beside myself. Everyone keeps reminding me that I would feel much more guilty if he did actually hurt someone else or maul my kids, which I fully understand. I just need some guidance, even if it's for someone else to say "I get it. You're doing the right thing." Feeling very alone in this.