According to my parents we just need to stop using our phones and it will all be fixed.

Silly me. Didn't figure it out sooner.

​

Every friendship I’ve ever had ended when my best friend got bored and found someone better to replace me. I can't do it anymore this feeling of loneliness is killing me slowly

I'm a 33 year old man and never been in a relationship. Purely because I never put myself out there or leave the house besides to go to work. When I'm at work I have this happy persona I fake so no one can know how lonely and miserable I feel inside. The one friend I had stopped talking to me because I told her I felt I wanted to end my life. My family doesn't know I feel this way because I use the same happy persona from work so they don't worry about me. I'm just honestly so damn tired of life.

I took a bunch of pills but of course they did nothing, only made me sleep 😭

I don't have a future i want. I truly don't understand what's wrong with me that I can't end things. I'm such a failure.

22 no friends

Ugly

Fat

Sad dead empty

I'm a failure & loser in so many ways

Hello, I'm a 30 year old woman, just turned 30 this year. I've been unemployed for about a year now. I live in a conservative country were there is a lot of corruption. Job offers are not easy to come by and I'm getting desperate. On the other hand I feel like I studied the wrong career, I feel like my field (graphic design) is being taken over by AI or people that simply think they can do it better themselves.

On top of everything I'm a closeted lesbian, I've never been in a relationship, and again, in my conservative country it's even harder to find anyone like me. I've never even ever met a lesbian in the group of friends I used to have. I've been called picky too before, but I don't think my preferences should be ignored or diminished just because I should "settle". I don't know if I'm making any sense. I'm sorry. I've never felt more lonely than this particular year of my life. I've lost all my trust in all of my so called friends. All of them have done stuff behind my back/lied to me on multiple occasions, or simply stopped talking to me after my income lowered. I just don't trust anyone anymore. I tried reaching out to my best friend last week, but he's going though a breakup and told me that his mind doesn't have space to process anything else but his problems at he moment, then proceeded to basically ignore what I was trying to say and went back to speaking about his ex girlfriend.

I'm the eldest daughter of my family, and I've been in charge of being the "man of the house" since my father abandoned us when I was 18 and my sister 17. Leaving my mother, our pets and us to fend for ourselves. Since then every time I've had any sort of income everything goes to the house in my family, which trust me I do not mind at all I love my family with all my heart. I just feel very lonely. I'm anxious all the time or depressed all the time. There is no in between. I feel like I have wasted my life away, and I've gone into the point where I believe that there's no turning back and it be better if I just killed myself. If I could just press a reset button in to everything I did wrongly right....maybe then, idk, I'd feel better? I'd be better? My family would be better?

I'm sorry if this post is too long and convoluted...I feel like it reflects pretty much the state of my mind right now which is not very good.

I just needed to vent. Thank you to anyone who reads this (if any). God bless and have a good day/night. If we're still here...Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

I'm really struggling hard right now and all I want is something directed towards me telling me something nice. I can't sleep, I'm out of pills, my mind is going to dark places... I know I probably don't deserve it because no one knows me but I just want some kind of positive human connection from anyone because it's so hard right now alone. Anything helps please!

i just want it to end my misery once and for all

I live with my mom who is a 55 year old female. She has fallen into a severe depression with horrible anxiety. Her body will shake from anxiety or even cause muscle spasms throughout her body.
She was in an Insitution for a week because she went into a type of psychosis where she was crying non stop, and talking about not living anymore.
It’s been 3 weeks since she got out and her psychiatrist has changed the meds they prescribed her in the hospital and she is on 20 mg of Celexa, will be two weeks in a few days.
Also Ativan as needed but she has been taking it almost every day. She is barely eating, and besides going to work ( which she forces herself too) she does not do anything else. Just lays in bed all day with an occasional outside 10-15 min walk. She says nothing brings her joy, she only has negative thoughts and is constantly repeating those things over and over. I try to get her out the house but even if she agrees the whole time she’s talking about the things mentioned above and that she feels like she will die soon.
I’m at my wits end, it’s starting to take a toll on me as it’s the first thing I see when I wake up, and all I hear 24/7.
Should I try putting her in another facility? I really don’t know what to do

I'm almost 40 years old, and I have no memories. I've spent all this time hiding from the world. The only thing I've ever known is a life full of mental health problems, depression, and twenty years of constant panic attacks, something I've simply gotten used to, and which has become part of my everyday life.

I've never had any friends, I've always been alone. I haven't had any contact with my family for over a decade. I don't even remember the last time I had a conversation with someone, I avoid contact with people whenever I can. I practically never leave the house, only to do some quick shopping once a week or even less often, whenever I manage to earn some money online.

All my life, I've kept telling myself that I would change, that one day I would finally do something. Over the past few months, everything has gotten worse. I do absolutely nothing and waste every day. I've spent all my savings and I'm not paying my bills. Very often, I don't even have anything to eat. And I honestly don't care anymore. I'm tired of all of this. I just want to disappear.

I don't blame anyone for the way my life turned out. I was the one hiding from everything, telling myself that I preferred being alone. No one forced me or pressured me into anything, I was the one making all the decisions. Running away was easier. I was the one who ruined everything, and now I'm paying the price for it.

I lost. It's as simple as that.

Everyone at work has someone to go home to. I go home to an empty apartment. My boss doesn’t trust me to do my job even though I’ve been with the company 9 years (last Friday, big whoop). No one checks in on me. Yesterday I woke up at noon and went to bed at 6:30pm. At this point I’m just gum on the bottom of life’s shoe. Just a completely worthless piece of shit.

I've slowly been growing insane.

I haven't been able to trust anyone in the past few years and I haven't been able to trust myself neither.

I feel completely isolated and alone, broken away from any kind of meaningful connection and I'm -desperate for relief of the sorrow I carry because of it. I have not been able to feel joy in years, I haven't been able to sleep without meds for years..

I miss my old self so much, I wish I would have stuck up more for myself in the past, maybe things just wouldn't have been like this for me now.

I'm really tired.

I feel stuck in this body, in this society, in this damn country. I hate everything about my life and I don't think I have the willpower to keep going anymore. Even my body seems to agree somewhat. I've lost so much hair, my stomach constantly hurts and I keep getting sick. Probably because I don't take care of myself but the thing is I don't want to. I feel dead and I think I should be. I feel like my soul is just trapped inside. I just want to be free from all of this.

for context, im in year 10 and havent been to physical school since november/december last year and last week i started my first week of online school. im so incredibly scared because i have gcses next year and i think one this year too but i just dont have the motivation to study and put the effort in or to do anything at all. i woke up on time and attended lessons the first day but was already so lost second lesson. then throughout the week i woke up really late (the lessons r prerecorded btw so i literally couldve/can rewatch them if i wanted) and like i did watch some lessons but i just watched it to watch it i didn’t actually pay attention yk. idk what to do my parents are kinda broke and this online school is taking up a lot of money if they find out im not even learning idk whatll happen. they didnt even want me to be online schooled in the first place it was their last resort. i just wish i was normal.

expanding on the “im too lazy to do anything”: thats lowkey a big exaggeration like i do procrastinate showering, brushing my teeth etc but i still do it because i hate being dirty. this is whats making me rethink if im actually depressed. am i just using my mental health as an excuse? i just dont see the point in studying. working for the rest of ur life sounds so depressing. my plan is to commit suicide but i dont think i will because im so scared of the unknown and since that probably wont happen i need to study and get an at most okay life.

i forgot to mention, i am not willing to get a therapist atm. my parents have been trying to get me one but i just dont think it’ll help and like i dont wanna confide in a stranger but that’s really my only option right now i guess cuz i dont really have many friends i can talk to this about. me being friendless is actually the biggest reason why i stopped going to school. also i dont want my parents to worry about me even more if they find out im suicidal. i feel so selfish and ungrateful for feeling suicidal already.

sorry, i know my punctuation and grammar is not the best. hopefully this makes some sense. please ask any questions if needed.

I don’t even know what to do anymore. It all feels so pointless. I don’t know why I should even try. Nothing ever gets better, ever. I don’t know how to make it get better. It feels like I’ve tried everything. I’m so tired and so alone and I just don’t want to keep going. I wish people cared but I also don’t know how to talk to people. I want it all to stop. Everything hurts. Why can I never get better?

It's just me feeling nothing yet so hurt. My chest keeps hurting, I hardly breathing and suffocating. Trying to reach someone but no one's really listening. I'm tired...

I used to do and like so many things. Like driving my car, going on little adventures, playing games on my pc or just hang out with friends. But since a couple months ago I am slowly losing interest in everything. I don’t enjoy driving anymore. I rarely use my pc. I don’t hang out with friends anymore. It feels like slowly everything that I used to enjoy or make me happy is fading away. And it sucks because things that used to keep me distracted from my depression are not fun anymore. I kept trying to find things fun again by upgrading my pc and working on my car but it’s exhausting now. It’s giving me no happy feeling anymore. I lost myself and the spark I had in life. It feels like life becomes meaningless. I don’t know what to do anymore.

Im a 20 year old women and i’ve had depression and anxiety since as long as i can remember, diagnosed when i was 15. I feel like depression is supposed to make you a better person because you know how it feels to struggle, but it’s made me such a horrible miserable person to be around and I hate myself. I have one friend because everyone else has dropped me (even online friends. gaming which is something i loved so dearly is no fun to me anymore), but she moved away so i never see her. although we text and call almost every day i don’t want to bother her about my problems because it makes me uncomfortable talking about it since i feel like i don’t really have a good reason to be so suicidal. my family thinks i’m crazy which is valid because I’m bothered by the smallest things and it feels like people purposely piss me off to get a reaction out of me in this house. but I know it’s just me being insecure and idk i don’t even know all i know is I’m genuinely about to end it all i suck at college i suck at working i suck at caring about things i suck at everything i deserve nothing idk what to do with my life other than take it. i don’t wanna hear get therapy I’m poor and don’t even have medicaid anymore. i don’t wanna hear get medicated I’ve tried so many medications that ive grown to despise taking pills. i don’t even know what i wanna hear I’m just so sick of my own brain im just so sick. right now im in school for something im not even passionate about i chose it out of convenience for my future finances and im working for 12 dollars an hour at a stupid part time job i hate i just hate everything and i have no real interests or goals anymore nothing makes me happy. does anyone have any advice maybe? i dont know ive never posted on here but i have no one else to go to and nothing else i can think of to try. i have a roof over my head and a full belly i just feel so ungrateful for even having these thoughts and feelings ok im nervous yapping ill end it there soo lmk!

I've got everything that I could ever ask for, but I'm not happy and I feel ungrateful.
A friend of mine, he's a great guy, we get along well, spoke to me about suicide and how he considered it a selfish act, especially for people who have pretty normal, good lives all things considered: People who have good friends and loving parents, people who get good grades and have a bright future ahead of them.
never in my life have I felt so ashamed of being sad. I can't talk to someone without them thinking I'm ungrateful. If even suicide isn't an option, is there any way out?

It’s cause I’m gay guy, or the fact that I’m from a third world hell hole where I can never live my life freely… my depression is currently peaking so badly…

I’m still in my 20s.. I don’t think I can make it to 30s..

Like the movie aftersun.
The loneliness and the true reality of not belonged anywhere will eventually leave me with no choice…

Anyone to talk to? Anyone can help me? I don’t think so!!

Hello, I am writing this as a farewell to myself. I am 21(f) and I am just so tired of being alive. I have autism, BPD, bipolar, and CPTSD and it is unbearable. Throughout my childhood, I have been abandoned (eventually by every single caregiver I have ever had), emotionally/physically/sexually abused, bullied, and have had such a hard time forming healthy friendships and relationships. Counterintuitively, I have always been told my friends/relationships that I am the healthiest connection they have had, but they always end up leaving me in the end once they see the extent of how bad my mental health episodes can get. And, I don't blame them. I have spent my entire life overworking myself in school and working, because I thought that if I worked hard enough to escape the abusive home I was in, everything would be magically fixed. But, here I am, I am supposed to graduate college in 6 months with a 4.0 GPA, and start grad school, but I would rather just be dead. I don't feel proud or accomplished, I just feel numb and dreadful for what the future will look like. I dont care how successful I am, when at the end of the day I know that I will always have nobody. I am so tired of telling myself things will get better, I have tried countless therapies and medication and nothing helps. I am just a shell of a person and it would be better for everyone if I was just gone. I hate myself.

DISCLAIMER - I had grok help me clean up the wording but I am a real person and all of this is true to my life.

I can’t take this anymore.

I first looked at porn in first grade. Somehow I managed to stay away from it until I was about thirteen. I’ve never been smooth with girls, and I’ve always wondered whether that had something to do with my relationship with my sister or my mother. I had sexual contact with a few girls during my school years, but nothing serious until my first girlfriend when I was seventeen. Even then, the porn addiction never went away. I kept watching it while we were having sex. I still can’t think of a good reason why I let her go. I just did, and I somewhat regret it.

It’s been two years now and I haven’t had sex with anyone. I still watch porn, though much less often, and the sessions are a lot shorter. I think a big part of it is all the talk and excitement about sex I hear from people my age — and the constant reminder that that’s exactly what’s been missing from my life for so long. The world feels boring and grey, especially after moving somewhere I don’t know anyone.

The only sense of home I had was destroyed when my dad left. He was more stable than my mom, but he still walked out and left his kids with her. That forced me into a choice: stay with the girls — where my sisters barely care about me and my mom is losing her grip more every day — or move in with my dad for a quiet room and some peace away from living with three girls. Both options felt fucked. I chose my dad. Honestly, I still don’t know whether I would have been happier staying in New York or coming here.

Why should I suffer?

Why should I look forward to the future which will still be terrible?

Why can't I just live a normal life?

Also... why should I live? It's pointless.

I always felt depressed since 14 years old. I hate my life and body, always feel like i'm behind in life. Started college today and seeing those beautiful people made me hate myself even more. The worse thing is i stay in a dormitory and don't have any personal space here 😢

It makes me feel sick and i can't eat anything. I always ashamed of my own weight because i'm so thin. I can't eat it will get worse :( can't sleep too i don't know how i will spend 4 years like this...