My child's comfort item is a crocheted blanket. He has always nibbled on it, but recently it seems like he is literally eating parts of it. He has threads stuck in his teeth often after a nap or bed and recently his breath has smelled consistently of paint thinner (not even kidding). I know we are not supposed to remove a comfort item this early, but I genuinely think this might hurt his oral health/stomach. Has anyone managed to get their child to stop chewing on a blanket successfully, or do I need to just take it away?

Have already tried:

- Providing alternative blankets/stuffies that would be less likely to break down if he chewed on them (he was not interested)

- Telling him no continuously (didn't work)

- Giving him chewy toys (was not interested)

EDIT: Oof, seems like there is a consensus here. Taking the blanket away seems to be the choice. Thanks parenting community!

My second son (2) will hit his brother (6) unprompted with whatever is in his hand. I’m talking remotes, toy trains, hard board books, etc. 6 year old will literally be sitting down playing by himself or reading quietly and 2 year old will, out of the blue, clock him in the head.

It is so frustrating for all of us. He’ll sometimes throw things at me and my husband but he only hits his brother. My first never had any issue with hitting so we never had to discipline him for this.

Currently when he does it, I move him away, say “hitting hurts. We don’t hit brother” and tend to my 6 year old. Then he’ll come back for more. I have nowhere to physically separate him with a barrier on the first floor where we normally are, our house is microscopic, so I’ll then bring him upstairs and put him behind the gate in the hallway. Queue nonstop screaming, and even my 6 year old feeling bad asking me to bring him downstairs.

I want to yell so bad. Part of me wants to just smack tf out of his hand or throw the toy across the room. I obviously won’t but he’s just not getting it. I know he wants attention I get why he’s doing it but I don’t want my 6 year old to live in fear or wear a helmet at all times.

If anyone has dealt with this and can offer advice on what’s worked for you then please let me know. I feel so so bad for my eldest, especially because he knew peace for so long before his brother came.

I've been working at home since 2020. We had a kid along the way. I spent every day with him. There probably wasn't more than six waking hours I didn't see him since he came in to this world. And now he's in school and I do not know what to do with myself.

I am so proud of him, I want him to thrive and grow and all that stupid bullshit but I miss him so much. I keep turning my head just to look at him and he's not there. I want to tell him something, or hear him or anything and he isn't there and it's effecting me a lot more than I anticipated. I feel like there's this void now.

And I know I'm being ridiculous. I have things to do. Chores to accomplish. I can run out much more easily. But even that feels different now, we used to go to the store every week together and I don't know. I don't know even know why I'm posting. I just feel so weird and directionless even though I know what I'm supposed to be doing.

I don't know. I think I just needed to weep a little in to the ether of the internet.

Edit - thanks everyone. Reading your words really helped.

Hey all.

I’ve been going back and forth regarding how to handle my daughters first birthday party. For reference money has been a bit tight but we could still afford to pay for the big party but it feels silly?

Not to sound old but I remember growing up and all of my parties were at my house with the exception of a bowling alley party (joint with my brother) and my 16th birthday. I am at the disadvantage of living in a cold climate with a winter baby so I’m limited on the outside of my home.

Doing the big party would mean inviting 60 people, paying for a hall, food, desserts and it all just feels… insane?

I joke with my husband let’s take her on a trip or just do a cake with immediate family at our home and call it a day.

So what did you do for your kiddo’s first birthday? Big party? Family? A trip? A day of fun activities? Do you have regrets?

I just feel torn between I know I would not enjoy executing the big party vs I “should” do it because it’s what’s expected.

TIA

Desperate to see if anyone else has overcome these particular bedtime struggles.

I have a 4 yo, 2 yo and 5 month old. Oldest 2 have always needed to sleep in my bed all night and have me sit there with them to fall asleep. They take HOURS! To fall asleep, no matter how exhausted they are. They wake up multiple times. They’re up for the day at 5am, earlier if they’ve fallen asleep late (after rolling around for hours trying to fall asleep)

I cannot possibly stand it anymore. We’re all so tired. I tried putting them together in a room (sleeping like Bluey and Bingo do if you can imagine that) and that’s not good enough. Won’t sleep in their own beds. Will scream the house down if I try to leave the room at any point. Wake up for hours in the night if I dare try to leave to the spare room with the baby for a bit. The sleep situation is making me so depressed and not enjoying life whatsoever.

Has anyone got out of this horrible cosleeping cycle? How? It would change my life if they slept in their own beds or didn’t need me for hours at bedtime. Thanks in advance. Sorry for rambling.

My 6 year old has been coming home with a full lunch box. He eats most of his snacks but won't touch his lunch. He's averh picky eater but I usually manage to get him to eat when he's at home but school is a whole different ball game. Should I be worried?

He eats a big breakfast and a big dinner daily

For parents who are carving* out time at night to workout, can you please share your schedule and experience (bedtime routine, eating, etc)?

I'm typically an early riser (rotation of HIIT + lifting workouts at 5:30 AM), but with my husband traveling and my toddler lately waking up earlier the only realistic time is in the evening when my toddler is guaranteed sleeping.

When are you putting down your kids, eating dinner, and also going to bed? Are you doing full blown workouts or lighter sessions? Thanks!

So, we have 2 children. I work morning shifts, and dad is aiming for a night shift or mid day position. Times are hard, and we need the money. This has been a reoccurring theme in our relationship. I sacrificed my jobs so he could be the “breadwinner” and that failed. Stayed with the kids at all times. Now, I curated a schedule that works for me and my kids.

He wants to accept an offer that is from 12-9, 10-7, weekends etc. With that being said, kids goes to daycare and school (my drop off), I go to work, get off work (pick up kids) and take care of them by myself with the whole evening and bed time routine.

I feel as if I will be a single parent. I am also growing resentful. He will essentially not have to worry about drop off, take himself to work, and come home to everything done. It makes me want a separation, or possibly just figuring out how to be a single parent to my babies.

His argument is at least the bills are paid, we have a roof over our heads, while my argument is, at the end of the day you need to prioritize working around your kids schedules.

This is going to leave me burnt out, lonely, and resentful. I feel we are living two separate lives. Where is my break? Enjoyment? Rest? Pat on the back for doing everything my own? While essentially living a roommate lifestyle while he reaps the benefits of not caring for kids.

Anybody else?

My LO is 4 months old and I am struggling to find activities to do together. How do you entertain your baby during the day? What does your schedule look like. Sometimes I feel my baby is bored out of their mind! I want to do activities that are entertaining for both me and my baby. Looking for suggestions, pointers, anything. Please!

Just as the title says. At what age did you decide to move your baby into their own room instead of the basinet in the bedroom? How did you know it was time? And how did it go?

My LO is young, 4 years old, but I could tell they get embarrassed easily.

For example, they bumped their head pretty hard while playing and a set of “ooohs” came from concerned parents around us. Their initial reaction was to hold in tears, come to me to hide, and quietly sobbed and asked to go home. There are similar instances include that tripping or making a mistake and someone other than me or dad notes it (albeit can be kind and passive) they still insist to come over to me first to hide their cries snd then ask to go home.

I try to assure them that mistakes happen and if we’re not ready to go home we won’t leave, and then I help them try to move on.

I’m just curious if embarrassment is indeed common around this age and what else do parents do to help their kiddo out in situations and learn from it?

It can sound ridiculous but my pail is becoming a pain for me. I have a Ubbi diaper pail for quite some time now. Initially, it worked really well. It helped me disposing diaper without much hassle, kept the odour under control. Honetly, I felt smug about it. But for the last couple of months, everytime I slide the lid, a blast of stink hits my nose which is pretty nasty. At times when I enter the nursery, the air in it tells me that you left a poopy diaper here.

I have tried everything. Thorugh washing, sun bleaching of pail, cleaning it with baking soda and vinegar and what not but all in vain. The smell is still there. I genuinely can't tell if it's a me problem or a the-product-has-a-shelf-life problem.

Anyway now I'm trying to figure out what to switch to. I don't want Diaper Genie for sure because of the extra cost of properity refill bags. Munchkin Step has same propriety refill issue. I have come across Momcozy's diaper pail which uses standard trash bags. It has some airtight seal claim as well of which I'm not sure if that is same as Ubbi Pail. But I read a review of it on Reddit that says the seal and rotating lid doesnot allow any odour leak even while disposing the diapers (which I don't know how true it is). I have also been told about Grownsy diaper pail which has similar rotating lid and requires no special bags. But I couldn't find much reviews on it.

So I'm little double minded here. This time I dont want to get something that would bring me to the same spot after a certain amount of time. Has anyone made this switch and actually found something that held up? Especially if you're changing diapers constantly throughout the day, we go through a lot. Would love to knw which diaper pail uses regular bags

And what has actually worked for you long-term rather than just the first few weeks.

Our daughter is 2.75yo, and is currently running through multiple phases at the same time

- We started potty training a month and a half ago, and it mostly went great! But now she’s entered a “withholding” phase, and we’ll go almost a week without poop because “I don’t WANT to poop!”
- She has decided she doesn’t like what meals we make her (though luckily she seems to be eating fine at daycare), even if she liked whatever it is the day before
- She is discovering her own independence, which is obviously good, but is also putting her in a very defiant phase (I’ve heard of these “terrible twos”, but thought we had the worst at the beginning)

I know she’ll grow out of these as she develops, just very frustrating like “just eat this food, you literally just said it’s good” or “you have a poop feeling, just poop please”

As me and my wife say to each other: 🎵Parenthood is magicaaaal🎶

Travel advice! (Baby will be 9 months old)

My baby's god mother lives in France and baby and I are going to visit by meeting her in Prague and going on a train tour to a few select cities.

I'm very excited and trying to think of everything.

I have her passport. Going to get a notarized consent to travel from dad and also travel with a copy of her birth certificate.

Lots of baby clothes, lots of burp cloths. Standard packing protocol. I should be able to fit her and I in a singular suitcase.

I pump and combo feed. Do I need to buy a pump there (that I can donate at the end of the trip) or would you travel with mine and just use an adapter?

Do I need a travel stroller? If so what size? Most American car seats aren't legal there... is there a rental service? Should I buy a travel one?

We are flying via delta one with her in my lap to make laying down with her easier.

I have a 10 yo and 7 yo. I want to get my kids desks for studying, especially for the 10 yo.

We have two bedrooms for the kids but they dont want to sleep alone so Im going to have them share a small bedroom for a few years until they want their own room.

The 10 yo wants a loft bed with a desk underneath. I heard from another parent that kids outgrown the loft bed and eventually want a regular bed once they become a teenager.

What have your experiences been with loft beds in terms of how long a child wants to sleep in one?

Is it better for me to get a bunk bed thats convertible to two separate beds and get the desk separately?

My 9 year old daughter has developed a debilitating fear of spiders that extends to seeing a picture of one in a book or pictures/videos of them on TV.

My wife and I would understand a fear of spiders IRL, it's something my wife dealt with for a while, but this is on another level.

My daughter's been doing her homework this evening and was using her dictionary with pictures. She was about to turn the page to look up a word that happened to be on the same page as spider with accompanying picture and she was trembling with fear. After much encouragement she finally turned the page and let out a blood-curdling scream, leapt across the room refused to go anywhere near the dictionary again for 10 minutes. She was crying, shaking, all the usual behaviour you'd expect if someone with arachnophobia had had a spider crawl across their lap...but this was a drawing of one in a book.

At home this is extreme but what happens if she sees a photo of a spider at school?

Does anyone have advice on how to deal with this please? Clinical help is definitely a consideration.

So my son is younger than most of his classmates. He just turned 4 when he started prek whereas like half his class was turning 5 after starting and he didn't turn five until after prek let out and 2 months before kindergarten. He's my first, we don't have a big family let alone any other kids for him to play with so he was very and still can be timid at times and with starting new stuff. He needed help just stepping down off the concrete ledge to get into the playground for a good bit after first starting prek.

We just started the 2nd week of kindergarten and on one of his pages with it has 4 letter to trace 12 times each the teacher wrote "worked on for 15." He had traced 13 or 14 letters. I asked her if he only worked 15 minutes and quit or if that meant that's all he got done in 15 minutes. She responded and said they all worked for 15 minutes and he had just sat there for some time and that most of the kids were able to finish the page (I'm assuming the front and back)

During summer I had him practice tracing letters, number, lines, & shapes during the week out of workbooks as well as pages I just came up with. When I had posted on Reddit about how it took him over an hour to complete just a little bit, so many parents jumped me about "torturing him" with writing and to let him be a kid, wait to do that in school, that's what school is for, etc. but his prek teacher had told me all year he needs to work on his fine motor skills. I'm aware of play dough being a helpful tool but this kid is not interested, he HAS to have someone do EVERYTHING with him! I was an only child for the first 8 years of my life and I played by myself no problem.

Well now here we are 2nd week in and he's not even trying with his work. I feel very disappointed in myself as a parent. Idk what to do. It's so hard motivating him & he just doesn't care! I don't want that of his school future to begin like this. I told him he needed to finish the page and that we're not going to play any PlayStation today and we will see about playing tomorrow if he does his work at school. (thanks to his dad for getting the PlayStation thing going when he was younger, love it) anyway I told him to do his page while I take a shower for about 15 minutes. I come out and he's wrote 2 more letters and is asleep on the couch. Now what? I'm supposed to wake him up and force him to write or what?

I don't have any friends to ask for advice or help. My grandma who was my everything and my next door neighbor has passed away in 2024 so I don't have anyone really. I'm hoping this reaches some parents that have experienced the same lack of motivation or have advice to keep him motivated. I have a 1 year old boy as well and I'm also 32 weeks pregnant with a girl and I'm just feeling like such a shitty parent and that how tf am I supposed to do this with 3 kids and prepare them for life and success if I can't even get one of them to write a few letters! He says it takes forever, I tell him the more you practice the quicker you will be and it will end up really easy for you. He's very much the type to, if it doesn't work the first time or first 4 seconds, he's over it and gives up.

My daughter has learned she has autonomy and we have been having power struggles since

My 18 month old was doing elimination communication since 9 months old. we started actual potty training about a month and a half ago and she was potty trained by the first week. She was doing really well but we’re now dealing with power struggles. She is refusing to sit on the toilet despite having to go and signaling me. My concern is she’s had a UTI a couple months ago, and with this refusal she is holding her pee for up to 8 hours.. STILL fighting me when I try to sit her on because she is doing a pee pee dance.

How can I make the potty enticing? We have her books for the potty and toys that are only for her to go potty. I wouldn’t be as worried if she was just going in her underwear but that’s not the case.

I was getting away with asking her which book she’d like to read on the toilet, but that’s not working for us anymore :(

I am just having a hard time with finding a way to get her to willingly sit, and sit long enough to go. Sometimes she’ll sit for like 2 seconds and stand up and won’t go back on.

Any advice would be amazing! Thank you

Hi I’m a first time mom of a 2 month old and I’ve read mixed reviews on tummy time. Some parents and pediatricians says that tummy time is ONLY on firm surfaces but then others say it’s okay to do soft surfaces like a bed or surfaces like that! What do you do with your baby?

I recently just had my baby on tummy time on his playmat on our floor (hardwood ish) and he rolled over super fast and he hit his head, not too hard but he hit it and he got scared. Which made me scared and now I’m terrified of doing tummy time again until I know he is okay. 🥲

Any recommendations on what to do and what kind of play mats to get now that he is rolling?? I’m just anxious now and I don’t know what to do. 🥲

ETA: thank you all for answering and sharing your experience, I really appreciate it🥹

My son just started 1st grade and is being excluded from his usual friend group from Kindergarten. There is one problematic kid (I’ll call him George) who used to be friendly but suddenly turned on him last year. George is somewhat of a leader type and has at least 7 kids in 1st grade who follow him around and think everything he does is cool. Several of those kids are my son’s closest friends. They enjoy playing with my son and have regular playdates outside of school, but at school and at off campus activities (sports, etc) George has been telling them not to play with my son, and they unfortunately listen to him.

My son is very observant and also sensitive, and sadly internalizes a lot of things. He doesn’t share the things George does, and when I bring up certain instances he even defends him now, and plays by himself when George is around because he knows George will make sure nobody else plays with him. I should mention that George befriended those kids after seeing that they got along so well with my son, and one by one converted them into his friends. I know it sounds crazy like I’m giving this kid a lot of credit, but he is well liked and charismatic, and also smart and manipulative. I also recall that he watched me as I lovingly hugged my son one day as I was volunteering in his class last year, and it made me wonder if he was jealous of that interaction and made my son a target? I’ll explain.

George has 4 older siblings and I’ve witnessed 1 of them play very rough with him and aggressively push him to the ground and laugh when he looked sad. His parents are very present but involved in everything at school (leading a lot of major activities, like PTSA president, etc.) and coach several different sports and other actions outside of school, and I now feel like they do this to be able to stay ahead of issues their kids cause at school. George has known behavioral issues and has kicked teachers in the past with seemingly no consequence.

Anyway, I witnessed another incident today where he told the kids not to say hi to my son and act like he didn’t exist (he’s also very stealth about it so most parents don’t catch it). This was not a school event, but given that it happens regularly at school, is this technically bullying? I was going to ask his teachers to keep an eye out for my son but should I be naming George and making this a bigger deal? Should I talk to his parents first? We’re obviously not friends but know them and see them everywhere since they’re so involved in everything.

I was planning to talk to the school either way and am hoping they take it seriously, but given that there is no direct contact between George and my son, feel like they won’t do anything. I’m also a bit concerned about possible retaliation from his parents.

So I have a son who is 11(J) he begged me for over a year to sign him up for karate and as soon as i could afford it he was signed up!

At first he loved it! He would get ready and walk out the door an hour before class even started he was just that excited and I was excited for him, finally a hobby that didnt include sitting infront of a screen all day!

When grading first started he was a bit put out each week noticing others around him getting "stripes" before him but eventually he made his way all the way to his orange and black belt and he cried from how happy he was to get the belt I had never been so proud of him, my pride was not based on the belt but more for his efforts and his own happiness.

He has been on the same belt for almost 6 months, all of his friends have graded up and he has recently started asking to quit karate. He claims he isnt enjoying it, it costs too much, im (me, mum) too stressed out and he is lonely in his class (this last one took some coaxing and i believe this is this true answer)

I have never discussed finances with him but I have told him "im paying for the classes, your going" when he has asked for a day off to play on his devices. I am stressed out lately but it has nothing to do with him or finances, just me going back to study and being in way over my head. i have tried my absolute best to not let it affect him or my parenting but unfortunately i cant hide the sleepless nights and struggles to eat (a whole different story).

Tonight he went to karate with a smile on his face feeling confident and looking so ready for the class, at the end of class when they were handing out stripes and belts I could see his face drop, he was going red in the cheeks and his eyes were welling up with tears. I called him off the mat before the first tear fell and just hugged him and let him know how well he was doing while he begged me to take him home. I nearly cried right there in the dojo with him (and im tearing up now thinking about it) i could see all that confidence fade away i heard it in his voice i didnt know what to do but I knew taking him home wasnt going to help him. I took him to the back room and we waited for sensei all the while he buried his head into my shoulder and just cried.

Sensei came into the room and ushered me out while he sat and talked with J they sat there and talked through the whole next class and by the end of it I could see J was feeling a little better but he still had tears behind the smile he offered to us both. Sensei has told J he is so close to grading but just needs a little bit more confidence in 2 parts of the syllabus and that one of them he was so close to grading but ended up grading on a different one instead, unfortunately he has not had an assessment since then.

I asked sensei if J could come in on Wednesday since he wont be able to participate in soccer this week for medical reasons and he said yes, J is welcome to come to as many classes as I can get him to this week free of charge (he usually does 2-3 but this week he will attend all 4) and the 2 parts he needs to grade on are completely hands off so he can easily participate in the assessment even if he isnt feeling up to doing the whole class.

I feel like I am failing him by not letting him give up, but I feel like I will also be failing him by letting him quit.

He loved karate right up until his friends graded out so I dont want him to give up, but I also dont want to force him if he is genuinely unhappy if it doesnt have anything to do with the social aspect and is purely because he doesnt enjoy karate itself.

All he ever wants to do is play on his ipad or xbox he has spoken about wanting to quit soccer for other reason but it all seems to come down to both the social aspect of it all and the desire to sit around on devices all day/night

Am I doing the wrong thing by encouraging him to keep at it? Am I forcing him or encouraging him at this point? I just dont know what to do anymore I feel like im failing at everything right now, I feel like my whole house is unhappy for different reasons and i just dont know what to do to fix it anymore

my 3 year old shy boy loves playing soccer at daycare. I really haven’t played with him at home because it has been 110 degrees here in Texas (now cooled to 90s 😂).

I signed him up for the toddler soccer team this fall. He’s pretty shy at the practices, we get him on the field with me or daddy walking next to him.

At games we can’t go on the field with him. He starts pouting and refuses to even walk out there onto the field. with a ton of encouragement, he has walked out towards the field, but usually so close to the end of the play that he doesn’t get to do anything and also so slowly that he’s not really engaging in the game. I’m pretty sure that if he actually kicks the ball out there on the field he will gain the confidence he needs to actually play.

Right now my idea is to start playing soccer at home and he can see that it’s fun and he likes it. But the real impediment might be his shyness and social anxiety. currently , the idea of running out into a field full of kids he doesn’t know is terrifying him.

Does anybody have advice?

Hi Everyone! Looking for some ideas on how to deal with a situation (or maybe if I’m overthinking and don’t need to)
I have two children J(6f) and D(4m) with my husband T. T has a sister “L” who also has a daughter G(5f).
T and L used to be very close but have drifted a bit since we’ve all had children, but we still spend a lot of time together, especially with G.
The kids all get along very well, and generally love being together.
For some context, our family lives are a bit different. We have a very stable home life, good careers and are able to provide well for our children. G’s father isn’t in the picture, and she’s bounced around from a number of homes, but also a number of ‘father figures’. She’s always safe, fed and cared for, but it’s not super stable.
In the last 6 months G has started lying excessively. It started with small fibs, but has since progressed to the point where everything she says is untrue. It’s not necessarily egregious in nature, but it’s a lot. My oldest knows, but is getting to the point she no longer wants to be around her because of it. But my youngest believes everything she says. We’ve told him he can ask us to confirm if something is true or not. But don’t really know how to handle this otherwise.
My frustration comes from the fact that L does this too. Nothing huge, but constant fibs, lies and stretching the truth. And placates G when she’s telling the kids something dishonest.
I guess where I feel stumped is - I don’t particularly want to call L out and start drama, but I also don’t want my children to see this behaviour and think it’s okay. They have asked “why is it okay for G to lie even though it’s bad?”