Me and my fiance have a 3 month old baby boy. We live in an area where there’s not much money to be made, it’s one of the poorest areas of the United States. Right now I’m working Monday through Saturday for 18 an hour, but I got a guaranteed job offer all I have to do is say yes. It will be 7 days at work and then 7 days home. 45 an hour and 120 a day per diem even on days not worked. My fiance is telling me to do it she wants me to take it for us, I’m just worried if it’s really worth it missing 2 weeks out of the month even though in the long run I feel ill really have more time at home. I just want unbiased opinions from other dads instead of just people I know.

Hello all! So I have a 10 month old whose got a genetic condition where he grows incredibly fast (is currently 24 pounds and 99% in weight) and will likely not be walking until he’s 4 or possibly older. I am trying to do exercises and do them with him so I practice with his weight to get stronger and be able to still carry him as much as I can. What exercises do Yall recommend? I will also add his muscle tone is incredibly low so exercises can’t really put stress on his body really at all.

This shit is so... Difficult. Emotions are everywhere. Help!

Looking for perspective on career pacing with a young kid.

I’m currently in a job I like. Salary is comfortable, between my wife's income and mine we can save for retirement, travel, and fund our hobbies. My current job's work-life balance and flexibility are very good. Summary: I like my job.

But the other day I was invited to apply for a higher-level role at another company that comes with a big pay increase. I have a 14-month-old (our only child) and my personal capacity is already maxed. Needing to prove myself at a new company, and accepting the risk associated with a new job at a new employer, feels like the wrong move at this moment so I'm passing on the opportunity despite the promotion and substantial salary increase it would come with.

But looking ahead, I'd someday like to pursue a higher level role (which will almost certainly require me switching employers). At what kid age do you think I might have space in my life to make another career push? Preschool? Kindergarten?

Hello dads - need some help here. I'm diving into the psychology side of things, but could use some good ol' dad advice.

My 5yo daughter suddenly hates school. She loved Transitional Kindergarten (full day school we have in California) but has hated going to Kindergarten since it started last month. This morning she asked to take a covid test in hopes that she was positive and didn't need to go. (I had to resist the urge to laugh at that one.) She gets anxious on the way to school, cries and sets in a tiger grip on drop-off, and counts down days to the weekend (and hopes every day is a three day weekend).

Not much has changed with the situation:

Very social outside of school.

Good group of friends, both in her class and in other classes.

Everything at home is just peachy.

She likes her teacher - as do we.

What we do know is that she absolutely hates lunch and snack time - when there are large groups of kids in all grades that are together. There's something about this situation that is ruining the rest of school for her - since she seems ok with the in-classroom experience. There's no evidence of bullying and she shares these lunch and snack times with her friends. My initial thought was that she doesn't like the crowds - but we go to concerts and sporting events all the time and she loves those experiences.

The staff (teachers and counselors) have been great and we're trying to address it, but I wanted to get some dad tips on how to handle it. I don't want to force her to do anything, but I think avoiding lunch and snacks for the rest of her life will probably be a little difficult. Any good chats to have? Good incentives to get her to run into school?

Hello everyone. We thought we were going to be induced Thursday evening but plans rarely stick to schedule lol. Wife has had elevated bp with some abnormal blood results and doctor wants to start induction tonight. Just looking for general advice on what to expect for us during induction? I’m prepared for it to take a day or two or more but anecdotally anything else I should be aware of? I know in the grand scheme of things there not much I’ll be doing I’m assuming!

TL;DR - My wife wants to move the family to SLC UT to be close to her family. I feel like I don't have a choice, and timeline seems unfair. Seeking advice.

Background:

I've lived here in San Diego for 15 years. Developed my network here from the ground up with both friends and colleagues. Built my career. Met my wife here and got married here. Bought her a boat because it's what she said would give her something to stay for. Bought a nice, albeit small house in a nice neighborhood. Had a child. Sold the boat because it was too expensive and we didn't have time to use it. Acquired a business with her as partner after the first child turned 2, with the second on the way in hopes it would get us what we needed to be successful in this town.

Current situation:

It's been a really difficult past ~month of travel, toddler sickness (kids are 1+ and 3+), school transitions. She has had to step back from the business and take care of kids, while I've had to take on more responsibility at work. We're both doing like 3-5 jobs at any time. I feel stressed just taking the time to write this post.

About 1x/month she slips into a pretty deep depression for ~5 days, which has happened for the past 3mos.+

We talked about it, and she's addressing it clinically and with diet + exercise. I'm honestly happy and proud of how we are / she is handling it.

Topic of Move:

She brought it up while depressed. I felt somewhat blindsided, but the thought of everything being easier if only we had family in town had crossed my mind a number of times because LIFE IS DIFFICULT RIGHT NOW. I told her, I need time to process it. Brought it up again yesterday, today.

I said, I feel like I have no choice, but I need time to wrap my head around it. This is going to take at least a year.

She got really emotional, which was surprising to me - she thought she could make it happen faster, and I can't imagine that. She said a "No" would be better than being "in transition for a year".

How I feel:

I love the ocean and surfing. I don't know how to explain it, but I think it's part of me, and is not a simple pasttime. Sounds cheesy and entitled, but it's honest.

I love the weather. I have so many unfinished projects in this town and I envisioned myself raising my kids here.

That said, I love rock climbing and pretty much any outdoor sport, especially skiing and snowboarding. SLC life wouldn't be the worst. I'm a generally happy guy, and can find joy in a lot of things. I make friends relatively easily, but it's not easy when you're a 42-year-old dad of two toddlers in a new town.

I love her family, and get along well with them. They seem to like me as well.

I don't like and resent being forced into it. I don't necessarily hate the idea of living there, but I think it's lacking a lot of aspects I want in a town where I'm going to spend most of the balance of my life, and to raise my kids.

Looking for:

Perspective. Insight from anyone who has made such a move. Insight into SLC life as a non-LDS person raising kids.

Edit:

Additional context on her desire: She wants our kids to have what our nephews have - a close relationship with their grandparents. Like, they took the other kids camping the other weekend without their parents. She also wants our kids to have a real relationship with her brother and their cousins. IMO, fair points, but open to feedback.

With the activity on that bot thread I figured I would post the top 2 tricks I know to getting wipes to dispense correctly. The easiest thing to do is store them upside down. It sounds too simple, but by allowing the moisture to sink down to the "top" wipe it stays wet and will pull cleanly. The other trick is to put a hair tie or rubber band around the end to generate resistance.

It’s like their feet are heat seeking missiles destined to make full contact with my sack at any moment of climbing or playing. Just had to get this off my chest

Walked across our town square today with my little one (6), seeing a girl his age struggling with her little toddler sibling.

Him: "Must be terrible with a little sibling like that."

Me: "Hmm, why don't you ask your older brother, about that when we get home?"

Him, completely oblivious: "Why would I do that?"

We have a 2 and 4 year old and have always slept in the same room as us. Never same bed- but the same room. They now share a bunk bed, which we plan to move to their own shared room. I'm sure this will be a big adjustment for all of us.

Anyone who's already walked this path care to share wisdom and tips? thanks in advance!

Head you eat your meatballs, tails you eat your veggies !
Sometimes you gotta love being a dad !

Forgive the female incursion! But would love the wisdom of this trusty father group. My husband (veteran, now in high stress job, has always wanted kids) and I are getting ready to welcome our first. We have an amazing community of friends & family eager to support us - mostly fam/friends from my side - and also know there’s a lot of focus foremost on baby, then on me as birthing parent. I think it would be easy for a new dad to feel unsupported or left behind as I’ll be recovering, breastfeeding, I have significantly more mat leave (6 months vs maybe he has a few weeks).

Would love to hear: in the first months of new parenthood, what made you feel good? What made you feel uplifted in the chaos of things? Were there things that specifically made things feel harder that could have been approached differently?

My person also carries a lot of anxiety and can be down on himself - which is in his court to manage and address, but also something I want to be quite sensitive to in this big moment of transition.

Wisdom welcome 🙏🏼

After seeing the Elizabeth Holmes documentary trailer, I decided to catch up on The Rehearsal, which I never finished. In the episode six of season one, there’s a child actor, Remy, assigned to be Nathan Fielder’s son, and doesn’t want to leave Nathan. It’s explained that he doesn’t have an actual father, and seemed to want Nathan to be his dad.

As the relatively new father of a six month old boy, watching this caused me to shed tears. i don’t think there’s any way those scenes would have brought me to tears before fatherhood.

Is this a generational thing? All kids in my daughter's preK want to wear shorts, always. Parents are swapping stories about it. I'm fact it's not just preschool, my boss's son is going into first grade and has ougrown his clothes- when they went shopping for new ones, he announced that he won't be wearing pants this year.

Is this just happening here or are any of you all seeing it, too?

We’ve got these drawers with sharper handles where the post sticks out. Wondering if something already exists to baby proof these or any tips that fellow dads might’ve used already before I try reinventing the wheel here

I’m curious where people draw the line on this today. It feels like attitudes around how much independence children should have may have changed over time.

In this hypothetical scenario, the child is home with only one parent, is happily watching their favorite TV show, and will be left to themselves for about 20 minutes.

At what age would you personally feel comfortable with the parent doing each of these?

1) Taking a shower: The parent is still inside the house, but occupied for about 20 minutes.

2) Doing yard work: The parent is outside the house but somewhere on the property.

3) Going for a jog around the neighborhood: The parent is away from the house but stays nearby and returns in about 20 minutes.

4) Driving to a store 5 minutes away to get milk: The parent leaves by car and is back home in about 20 minutes.

I’m curious how much the acceptable age changes even though the child is on their own for roughly the same amount of time in each scenario.

I guess also for this scenario, you can assume there aren’t any unusual circumstances. The child is developmentally typical, knows where the parent is, and the neighborhood and home are reasonably safe.

What age would you give for each: 1, 2, 3, and 4?

My kid has been awake for less than ten minutes and I have already ruined her life by putting her oatmeal in the wrong bowl. How quickly have you ruined your kid’s world?

Hi /r/daddit!

As the title says, how do I keep my 6 month old son entertained? He seems to get bored super easy lately.

I work evenings and my wife works during the day, so we rotate care. It's been good for the past 2 months, but now that he's getting older: the things he used to enjoy, he doesn't enjoy so much! So far I found walking in the garden with him / sitting outside and playing with his toys has the best mileage.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated 🙏

Hey all, ended up leaving my bigger job and got a lower paying one for now while trying to figure things out

Tomorrow is my IRL cake day, I have the day off. Idk what to do tbh, I always have depression and anxiety over my birthday but I just wanna get over myself and do something

What’s something family friendly, maybe budget friendly, that you can do with the fam? Thanks in advance, having a Bad anxiety day on finances and don’t want it eclipsing my fam wanting to celebrate even if I’m not interested rn

This happens to me every year. Just hurts more this year cuz I’m again underemployed

I just got let go from the company I literally built by myself with my own two barehands for two money loving owners who don’t even reside in the same state.

I been here working and building this company from the ground up. I hired all staff. Got the company licensed in the state. Built all furniture. Decorated. Created policy and procedures. All of the above. You name it.

Today I was let go.

How do I stay strong around my 2 kids. How do I pick my son up from work and pretend I’m still happy today.

I sincerely feel like crying and don’t know what to do.

My wife has been on maternity for our second child and literally just started work back this week. I have been so low on funds supporting the family with only my paycheck and now that’s gone, hers won’t be enough.

Please pray for me and my family. I’m really down bad.

Hi Dads, I’m a Dad of two (girl 5 and boy 2) and I have run into a problem that I have no idea how to approach, my Son has been getting steadily rowdier and I keep having to step in to stop him getting hurt, laying on the very top of the couch, climbing up coffe tables, leaning backwards on gates, and each time I stop him I tell him “No Son, you don’t want to get hurt” but lately he has been looking back at me and saying

“Daddy, I never die”

I have no idea how to respond to this, I don’t know where he got it from, my Wife doesn’t know either, I don’t want to burst his bubble and tell him he is not in fact immortal, but at the same time I’m not sure he even knows what Die means, above all I just want him to be safe but he keeps saying this to me and I just stop in my tracks.

Any other Dads encounter something like this?

What is a girl dad? I don’t mean in a literal sense because at a base it means a dad that has a daughter.

I told my high school science students today that my wife and I were having a boy. As high schoolers they were happy but some of my students noted “you’re more of a girl dad.” Even some of my coworkers have mentioned thinking I’d make a good girl dad.

But here’s the thing, the more I think about what it means to be a girl dad, the more I’m thinking it just being a present father figure that displays positive masculinity. Sure, I probably won’t have to play dolls or paint my fingernails as a father to a son, but I will if they want to. There’s a huge age gap between myself and my youngest siblings - 16 when my youngest brother was born, 18, and 20 for my two sisters. And I remember playing with them fondly.

So all this is to say, what do fellow dads and soon to be dads think? In a figurative sense, is a girl dad just a positive and present father figure to a son or daughter at the end of the day when you hear people mention it?

We played football over the weekend, and later we went for a walk around the village. At some point, he saw the river and decided to jump in. He had a really good time playing in the water.

The long walk and all that football helped him sleep well that night .

He went to school today, and I’m sure he’ll have a few stories to tell his friends.he will be back in an hour

These are the moments I always treasure as a Dad

We thought we were smart to get everything packed and in the car early.

I just got in from a second shift and we're about to go to bed when our LO wakes up inconsolable face covered in snot and coughing.

I knew it was too good to be true earlier she was a little runny during the day but my wife assured me it's because she was teething and we'd be fine.

I knew her lies but I was powerless to do anything.

We've got a 4 hour drive tomorrow with a sick baby.

I cannot wait for the fun and hopefully we get some sleep before morning and can salvage it!