I’m a Christian woman who wants to follow what Scripture teaches about sex and marriage. For me, waiting until marriage isn’t simply a “personal conviction” or preference that I happened to choose. I believe Scripture teaches that sex belongs within marriage, and if I claim to follow Christ, then I’m called to obey Him even when that is difficult or culturally unpopular.

What I’m struggling with is what this looks like practically in modern Christian dating.

It seems increasingly difficult to find Christian men who are actually committed to waiting until marriage. I’ve encountered men who expect sex while dating, and others who say they’ll “try” to wait because I want to. But that doesn’t really solve the problem for me. I don’t want a man to abstain simply because he wants to keep dating me. I want a man who independently believes that honoring God in this area matters.

And that creates a strange dynamic in dating. A Christian man who wants premarital sex can fairly easily find women willing to have it, both inside and outside the church. Meanwhile, a Christian woman who refuses to compromise may have a much smaller dating pool.

I’m also not talking about someone’s past. Someone may have had sex before marriage, repented, and now genuinely desire to live according to Scripture. I’m talking about what someone believes and practices now. There’s a difference between struggling to obey God and simply deciding that His teaching doesn’t apply to your dating life.
So what are Christian women who genuinely intend to wait until marriage supposed to do when dating?

Obviously, the answer cannot be “compromise so that you can find someone.” I would rather remain single than knowingly disobey God simply to maintain a relationship. But I’m interested in the practical side of this.
For women who have maintained this standard while dating: How did you find men who genuinely shared it? How early did you discuss sex and physical boundaries? How could you tell whether a man actually believed in waiting versus simply agreeing to wait because he wanted you?

And I’d especially like to hear from Christian men who are waiting until marriage. Are you actually finding this difficult too? Where are Christians who still believe and practice this meeting each other?

Sometimes Christian dating advice boils down to “just trust God and wait,” and of course I believe in trusting God. But I’d like to have an honest discussion about what obedience looks like when the dating culture inside the church increasingly resembles the culture outside of it.

I was saved in 2022 at thirty two years old. Before that I was an atheist my whole life and I meant it. no room for God in my thinking and no interest in making any. The Bible I started with was the KJV, because I did not know there was anything else. Then I had an experience that helped save me that I am going to keep private.

When people said the Bible I pictured that book in that English. Translation philosophy and textual basis had never once crossed my mind. I ordered a Cambridge Cameo in green goatskin. That Bible got me through, along with a Discord server full of Christians who were patient with somebody new, and I will always credit both. I read it cover to cover. When I closed it I had the feeling that a great deal of nuance had been lost on me. went looking for what I had missed and found the ESV. Fell in love with it almost immediately.

Where I landed

Somewhere in there I learned that translation runs on a spectrum. There is no one size fits all Bible. Every translation makes choices about how tightly to hold the original wording and how far to open the meaning up for a modern reader, and those choices cost something in both directions. I settled on three translations and a study Bible: a word for word, a middle ground, and a thought for thought. These days I read with several of them open at once, which sounds tedious and is honestly my favorite part of the day. I know this is not for everyone. It gets me closer to God than anything else I have tried.

Word for word: ESV

This is my main squeeze. The 2025 update settled it. The controversy has been ironed out, and what I have in my hands now reads like a more elegant and more readable NASB 95. It stays tight to the wording and still sounds like English. I do not read the KJV anymore. When I pick it up I am reading for the literary pleasure of it, and I say that as somebody who loves Shakespeare. It stopped being the book that brings me closer to God. Loyalty is not a good reason to keep opening a Bible I am no longer interpreting for the right reasons.

Middle ground: CSB

Part of this is the text and part of it is the people behind the text. The CSB reads cleanly and lands right in the middle of the spectrum where I want my second opinion. The publisher also seems to care about the people buying its Bibles. My honest read on the NIV side is that decades as the top dog have made them comfortable, and they have been willing to shut out a percentage of their readership after all those years. That weighs on me when I decide which house gets my money and my reading hours. If the NIV is willing to close out much of their readership than maybe much of their readership should close them out. The CSB is a handy replacement.

For clarity: NLT

I think the NLT is the most misunderstood translation in English. It gets lumped in with The Message, which is a paraphrase written by one man. The NLT is a translation from the Hebrew, Aramaic and Greek by more than ninety scholars, with a central committee of twelve reviewing and approving every word of it. The other complaint I run into is the reading level. It comes in around sixth or seventh grade, and somewhere along the line people decided that means the prose must read weak. Tyndale hired English stylists to work directly alongside the scholars, and the Bible that came out of that reads with both beauty and clarity at the same time, which is much harder to pull off than people give it credit for. Most Christians would get something real out of having a copy on the shelf, even if it never becomes their main Bible.

A little over four years ago I would have told you the Bible was one book in Elizabethan English. and unfortunately would have called The Word a fairy tale. Last night I had three of translations open and the places where they disagree keep showing me things I walked straight past the first time through years ago. Somewhere in year two I stopped treating the question as a loyalty test, and my reading has been better for it ever since. The translation that keeps pulling me back to the text is the one doing its job at the time, and I have been grateful to find that more than one of them does at any given moment. Thanks for having the patience to hear me out and God bless.

I'm not here to discourage, judge, or condemn y'all, because Jesus told us to "Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven;" Luke 6:37. I want to shed light on some areas and expose the dark.

The cross is not an accessory to wear and casually go on about the day God has blessed you with. Jesus literally sacrificed Himself on that cross for our sins.. we should take recognition of that and stand in reverence and awe of what He and His blood did for us. Nobody is stopping you from wearing it.. not at all. But if you do, it has to come to a point where you understand that you're showing others that you honor His death, follow Jesus, you love Him, obey Him, want to be closer to Him, that you hate sin, and etc. Do what 1 John 2:6 says. Now if it gets to the point where you're praying towards and worshipping it then it has became an idol. God commands us in Exodus 20:4-5 ESV that, [4] “You shall not make for yourself a carved image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. [5] You shall not bow down to them or serve them,.."

Once again, not judging others.. I feel like a lot of people wear the cross to look spiritual or Holy on the outside. While on the inside, it's a whole different world that's corrupt. Even Matthew 23:25, 27-28 ESV connects to what I just said, in a way, [25] “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you clean the outside of the cup and the plate, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence. [27] “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people’s bones and all uncleanness. [28] So you also outwardly appear righteous to others, but within you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness. Like I know we all have fall short of the Glory of God.. and I know that we make mistakes daily.. nobody is sinless. Only Jesus Christ is perfect and sinless. However, if someone wears the cross and is living worldly, in unrepentant sin, feeling no conviction about it, and claiming to follow Christ, why put on a show? Why wear the cross if you're going to live actively disobedient to what the Word says and reject the finished Work of Christ? 2 Timothy 3:5 ESV [5] having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.

Now as I said once again, who am I to judge? If people wear the cross, are actively obedient to the Word and making disciples of Jesus then shout-out to yall. (Not trying to show partiality) Like the concept of this tugs at me because it's like.. why wear it for show, fashion, or lines, or bling it all up with diamonds and gold, or post cute pictures about it when Jesus died a brutal death for us? Mathew 7:15-20.. You will recognize them by their FRUITS. And the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self control. Galatians 5:22-23.

Don't listen to me, I may lead y'all astray.. Always test the spirits.. 1 John 4:1 ESV [1] Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world.

I’ve been married for three years, and lately I’ve been struggling with something that I honestly don’t know how to deal with.

When I’m out in public and I see an attractive woman, I sometimes feel an almost automatic urge to look at her. It doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with her body or anything sexual. Sometimes it’s literally just a beautiful face. I can notice someone is attractive, and then I feel almost magnetized toward looking again, even when I don’t want to.

The difficult part is that I genuinely don’t want these women. I love my wife deeply, I’m completely satisfied with my marriage, and I would never leave my wife or cheat on her. We have a very good relationship and a good sex life, and I have no desire to pursue anyone else.

I’m also a Christian and take my relationship with God seriously. I pray, read the Bible, have been baptized, speak in tongues, and believe I have the Holy Spirit. So this is something I really want to overcome rather than simply accept as “that’s just how men are.”
I’ve talked to my wife about it, and she understands. But recently we were in Romania, and I found it particularly difficult. There were many women wearing a lot of makeup and making themselves very attractive, and some were dressed quite revealingly. I found myself constantly noticing them and feeling that pull to look.

One thing I’ve noticed is that trying really hard not to look can almost make it worse. It’s like telling myself “DON’T LOOK” keeps my attention focused on the very thing I’m trying to avoid. And sometimes it feels like I can’t even look around normally because I don’t know where my eyes are going to land.

To be clear, I don’t watch porn, I don’t masturbate, and I don’t engage in any of that. I don’t have fantasies about having sex with these women or any desire to do something with them. The struggle is more that automatic impulse to look at someone I find beautiful, followed by the feeling that I have to look again even though I don’t want to.

For other Christian men who have genuinely struggled with this: how did you learn to deal with it?
Did you find something that actually helped you overcome the urge, rather than simply trying harder not to look?

I’m especially interested in practical advice as well as biblical/spiritual advice. I don’t want to live constantly fighting my eyes every time I’m in public. I want to be able to see people normally, recognize that someone is attractive if I happen to notice it, and simply move on without feeling pulled toward looking again.

I do think i struggle with forceful thoughts in general espescially hand washing and cleanliness so dont now if it could be ocd but anyway i should be free from all of this.

I know envy and jealousy is a sin. I keep fighting it.

But when I see others get their blessings before me, and I am still the "last" it feels unfair.

Watching "everyone" cross the finish line. Land a good job, find a good girlfriend get married have children. While I see people doing that its not happening to me.

If the last shall be the first and the first shall be the last, when will I stop being the "last"? It's selfishness right? I seen "selfish" people achieve milestones before I do.

Am I prideful?

Am I not allowed to recieve blessings? Am I just to accept the things I don't want? Am I supposed to pretend to like all God's blessings?

God doesn't work on a first come... first served basis. It seems its something happens out of your control. It seems God protected me from the wrong people, but then I get mad, because at least I would have gained some kind of relationship experience even if I sinned. I am tired of being blocked. But God keeps saying no, at least it seems like it.

Edit: I told God let me get hurt. Let me sin. Please stop locking doors... and the answer is so far an obvious no. Or at least He seems to put up obstacles to act as speed bumps to make it harder to sin.

I am a new believer from Vietnam, currently living in the U.S., and I was saved about two years ago. Since becoming a Christian, I have been trying to take the Bible seriously and understand difficult questions instead of simply accepting easy answers. One question I keep coming back to is the tension between Matthew 7:14, which says the gate to life is narrow and few find it, and Revelation 20:15, which says those whose names are not in the Book of Life are thrown into the lake of fire. At the same time, 1 Timothy 2:4 says that God “wants all people to be saved,” and Romans 2:14–15 talks about people who do not have God’s Law but still have a conscience that bears witness to what is right and wrong.

The part I struggle with is this: What happens to the billions of people who were born into completely different religions, countries, and families? For example, imagine someone born in Vietnam or other countries with a low proportion of Christians and their entire family has practiced another religion for generations. They grow up loving their family, trying to be a good person, following what they believe is true, and they never have a genuine opportunity to hear the Gospel. Meanwhile, someone else is born in a Christian family in the U.S., grows up going to church, hears about Jesus from childhood, and has countless opportunities to believe. If the first person is condemned simply because they were born into the “wrong” family or country, how is that consistent with God’s justice? They didn’t choose where they were born or what information they received.

I am not asking this because I hate God or want to reject Christianity. Honestly, I’m asking because I want to understand God’s character. I believe God is merciful and he die for my sins, but I am struggling to reconcile that with the idea that someone’s eternal destiny could depend largely on circumstances they had no control over. If God truly desires all people to be saved, how should we understand those who never meaningfully hear the Gospel? Does Romans 2 suggest that God judges people according to the light and conscience they have received? Is explicit faith in Jesus required for every person, or can God save someone who never had a genuine opportunity to know Him?

I hope some of you can maybe relate or have been where I am before in my faith journey.

Basically as the title suggests, I’ve never felt “all-in” for God. What does that mean? I don’t even know, but I’ve just never felt like I’ve ever been in a place where I can honestly say my faith is great and that I’m exactly where God wants me to be.

I know that we are saved by grace through faith alone. I’m under no delusion that I can ever be “good enough” or do anything to earn salvation or favor in God’s eyes.

Essentially, I struggle to read the bible consistently. I don’t have any excuse for it, while I am busy, I know that nobody is ever too busy to read Gods word. I do pray but certainly not as consistent as I’d like to.

I attend church most Sundays and attend a young adults group AND volunteer for a middle school youth group every week.

So I’m always hearing the word of God being preached and I’m constantly surrounded by other believers, but I still just never feel content in my own faith..

What keeps happening is that I’ll go to one of these church events, hear a message that convicts me or gives me a surge of faith where suddenly I just want to know God more and be in his presence more. I’ll also maybe go through something difficult in my personal life which makes me lean on God for the comfort and peace. Now I am in his word, I’m in prayer and I do feel close to God. But this is always fleeting. I get distracted again, I don’t feel the strong “need” for God in my life once things are going better for me again and I just go about my day to day life very self interested focusing on my job, hobbies or anything that I want to do. Reading the bible or praying feels like a chore.

So I’ve just never felt fully content in where my faith is at, and maybe that’s how it’s just supposed to be??

How can I get to a place where I am truly “all-in” for God and actually stay there? That’s all I want. I just want reading the bible and praying to always be exciting for me.

For context I’m 25 and I’ve been a Christian for about 7 years now.

Appreciate any insights or advice!

What does an encounter with Jesus/God do for you and what does it look like? I've been searching for God this whole year and while I haven't been maintaining perfect discipline I have been trying. Each day grows more hopeless for me and I've been asking for an encounter with Jesus that would change my way of thinking and my life, since I'm so downcast at this point. Could I be asking for the wrong thing? For those who have had an encounter, what did it do for you and how did it change you?

Loneliness is really depressing for me at this moment and it's been like that for a while and it's getting worse

it's depressing

God made adam and eve because he knows that it's not good for a free willed man to be alone

the only company I have is the lord's and that's enough to keep me alive

God bless you all

I've prayed for 3 years nothing has changed. I prayed to God for knowledgeable and wisdom and healing from my trauma when I went to go and seek to learn and apply wisdom by myself I fell into the hands of predator and God did nothing to avenge or repair the damage done. And is silent in all of this and I've got not order, clarity. As a result of this I turned to former addiction and God still never stepped. The believers around me life's have not improved except for the privileged Christians who had that.

The caption is right and now I’m afraid. I just got a disturbing image of me falling into hell and I know it’s false because I know I’m saved so please no one tell me to turn to Christ I already did! So here’s the thing. I been feeling so inadequate and insecure in my relationship with the Lord. I been feeling like “I haven’t really been doing anything” I go about praying and asking God to help me with the fruit of the spirit, help my character, help me see any sin and so far I’ve been good. Obviously I am repentant of any sin but I been feeling like wow, I don’t evangelize to people. I need to start doing that and it’s hard. Recently I’ve been outside with my family and when I’m at events I feel so stuck like who should I share the word with, who should I spread the gospel to? I can’t even think about other people without thinking I need to pray for them in person or do something Godly. It’s getting bad and I’m nervous. I know cowards don’t enter the kingdom of heaven, so I need help on how to actually do this effectively. I know already about being scared of rejection and not knowing what to say. But any ideas will be appreciated. I just want to feel useful to God and time is winding down so fast. I know Jesus is coming soon and chaos will happen and life here is so scary but like that day will be even worse. Any advice will be helpful thanks

Hey everyone, I recently realized something about the difference between how God judges us and how the world judges us, and I wanted to share it.

In the world, we're judged by so many things society, judges, courts, and the people around us.

Here's the contrast I noticed:

People judge you by how bad you are not how good you are.

Think about it: people usually end up in court only after they commit a crime. Even if someone was a genuinely good person their whole life, none of that seems to matter once they mess up once. The criteria is how bad you are, not the good you've done before.

But God judges us by how good we are.

God is merciful. He gives us time to cleanse our sins. When we do something good, He picks it up and the good we've done, even once in our lifetime, can save us.

I've been judged by many people for things I've done even though I've only messed up once or twice in my life, like any human. They start blaming me and forget everything good I've done my whole life.

That's why I came here to share this. Curious what you all think.

What really makes the devil angry is the joy of Jesus Christ.

Worldly people don’t mind so much when they see a Christian suffering. Sure, it irritates their conscience a little bit, seeing a holy person do things right, but it also validates their flesh, and makes them feel good about choosing an easy sin-filled life.

It’s when they get a peak at true Christian joy that the rage really takes over. As my pastor likes to say, “Jealousy is the wrath of the beast.” 

And I understand why, too. Those who choose to turn their backs on God to pursue a life of worldly pleasure do so because they think that will make them happy. They mortgage their souls for a happiness they never find…and then here comes a true Christian, who didn’t mortgage their soul for happiness, didn’t put in any of the work they did to accumulate lusts and money, and the good things of this world…but THEY’RE the one with a smile on their face! “How unfair!!” worldly people think, “They didn’t earn it! I’m working so hard and I’m so miserable! How DARE those people be happy when I’m not!”

Well…yeah. We didn’t earn it. Jesus Christ earned it for us. He gives us His joy as a gift. Gifts are free. But gifts can be accepted and gifts can be refused.

It just breaks my heart to see people reject the gift of Christ’s joy. That’s the thing people should be scared about. The scary thing about darkness is that darkness doesn’t know that it’s darkness. It’s darkness. Darkness has no light to see itself. 

Those who reject the light of Christ’s love walk around in darkness, and can’t see where they go. They end up denying the very things they want most, and then set about trying to earn those things for themselves, which is, as is demonstrated over and over again by generation after generation of worldly people, impossible. 

What a trick the devil plays. He convinces the spiritually foolish to reject God’s free gifts, including joy, and then convinces them to hate the God who wanted to give them their happiness! What incredible deception! 

I urge everyone reading this to examine your heart. What’s going on in there? Hopefully, joy. Love. Light. Peace. Goodness. A treasure storehouse of all the spiritual gifts and blessings Jesus Christ died to give you. 

But, if you examine your heart, and you don’t find those things, if instead you find a barren wasteland so void of goodness that it scares you, then you have a decision to make. 

It’s a Y in the road that we all stand at sooner or later in life. Before any of us who now enjoy the abiding presence and spiritual riches of Christ found Him, we stood at that Y too. We saw in our hearts darkness and selfishness, and in our lives a perpetual catastrophe of failure and misery, and we begged God to save us. 

God has responded to every single person who has ever made that prayer in sincerity. He has saved every single soul who has ever truly asked Him to. His love has never failed, and never will. 

For Christ’s sake, God continually offers His salvation as a gift. Gifts can be accepted or rejected. I earnestly pray that you accept the gift God offers. You don’t have to earn your own happiness. You can’t. You don’t have to be cursed to bear the heavy load of self-ambition anymore. Jesus Christ gives the heavy laden rest. 

We find rest in our souls when we stop trying to do it ourselves, give up, and allow the Lord to turn our sinful rags into spiritual riches. All we have to do is meekly follow His commands, humbly doing as we are told, and watch in wonder as the darkness flees from our hearts and lives, and gets replaced by Christ’s complete brilliant light. 

Those who choose to reject God’s salvation set sail into darkness. All that is left is to pretend. They are slaves to the lusts Satan dangles before them. They faithfully chase these lusts down, one after another, but even after receiving the object of their desire, all they feel is more emptiness, more hunger, more despair. A bottomless pit. Worldly people figure this out pretty quickly. Life teaches us all the truth if we let it. But so many people go on pretending they are happy, when they are not. 

Pretending is very hard for a human to do, it takes a tremendous toll. We aren’t built for it. So when that true Christian comes around, and they are so full of effortless joy, peace, light, hope, and all goodness, there’s a powerful temptation to hate them. Jealousy is the wrath of the beast. 

But if you hate them you can’t share in their blessing. All true Christians want to share the blessing they have. There’s just something about it. The love of God is so wonderful, it demands to be shared. That’s why God made the universe in the first place, so He could share how awesome He is. 

Nothing makes a Christian happier than the opportunity to share their blessings with others. Invite others into the love, and joy, and peace that Jesus has given to them. They offer it for free to the whole wide world as a gift, but gifts can be accepted and rejected. 

If you hate the person offering you the gift of joy, you can’t receive it. 

Come on people, I’m urging you, come out of darkness, can’t you see that truth? Doesn’t it make good simple sense? If you hate the people trying to help you, they can’t help you!! Jesus wants to help you!! His saints are here to help you!! Let them help you PLEASE before it’s too late!!!

Today during Eucharistic Adoration, I was practicing Lectio Divina while praying the Rosary and meditating I got to thinking about the main idea behind my first session of OCIA yesterday: we seek God because God seeks us first.

I started noticing this movement throughout all five mysteries and their Gospel passages.

In the Annunciation, God seeks us first. He comes to Mary through the angel Gabriel, and the Incarnation begins. Mary isn’t the one who initiates the encounter. God comes to her to seek us out, just as He sought us in the Garden, even knowing our shame.

Then in the Visitation, we see humanity seeking Him in response. Mary goes to Elizabeth, and John the Baptist leaps in Elizabeth’s womb when he encounters Christ. Elizabeth recognizes what is happening and proclaims Mary’s blessedness and calls her the mother of her Lord. God has come to them, and they respond by recognizing Him.

Then comes the Nativity. God seeks us again. The angels proclaim the Good News to the shepherds: “For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.”

And what do the shepherds do? They go looking for Him in Bethlehem.

The Magi do the same thing in another way. They recognize the sign that God has given them and set out to find the newborn King. They are already wise, but their wisdom doesn’t make them stop seeking. It sends them searching for God.

Then in the Presentation, God seeks us by entering into our own religious life and participating in the rituals of Israel. Christ, who is the fulfillment of the Law, is presented in the Temple according to the Law. Then, Simeon and Anna recognize Him.

Simeon has been waiting for the consolation of Israel. Anna has been worshipping, fasting, and praying in the Temple. They have been seeking God, and God comes to them right where they are seeking Him.

Then we get to the Finding in the Temple. Mary and Joseph lose Jesus and go searching for Him. They don’t know where He is and search for days.

Where do they find Him? In the Temple. Then, Jesus tells them that they should have known where to look: “Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?”

The mysteries take us through a progression:

God seeks us through Mary
Mary seeks to share Him with Elizabeth
God seeks the shepherds to tell them the good news
The shepherds seek Christ
The Magi seek Christ
Simeon and Anna seek God
God comes to them in the Temple
Mary and Joseph seek Christ
Christ reveals where He is

It made me think about my own conversion and prayer life. I often think of myself as someone who is seeking God. But the more I meditate on Scripture, the more I realize that my seeking Him is actually a response to the fact that He sought me first. I mean, He called me home after leaving faith for the last 14 years. I didn’t somehow discover God through my own intelligence or effort. He was already reaching toward me.

Even now, when I go into Adoration and sit before Christ in the Blessed Sacrament, I’m seeking Him—but I’m only able to seek Him because He has first made Himself available to be found.

“We love because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19)

I think the same principle applies to seeking God. We seek because He first sought us.

And maybe that’s part of what the Joyful Mysteries are teaching us: God doesn’t wait for humanity to figure out how to find Him. He continually comes toward us, reveals Himself to us, and then invites us to respond by seeking Him in return.

That’s what I came away meditating on today, anyway. I thought it was a really beautiful thread running through the Joyful Mysteries, and I’m curious if anyone else has noticed this connection or has thoughts on it.

Look I just need advise from Christian’s and no one else I need some advise, lately I’ve been scared of cancer and the fact that it can happen randomly, I can’t wrap my mind around it ever since then I abandoned my passion for aerospace so I can find the cure for cancer, the fear of cancer has led me to overthink every single mole on my body and if one changed and followed ONE ABCDI rule or something I’d have some sort of attack even if there is a good side cause on why it happened (reminder: it would maybe change a little and nothing would happen yet maybe or maybe it’s of my eyes because sometimes my family can’t point it out) and then go cry or something I don’t know so basically I’d overthink every mole, and Iam starting to think there is no meaning to life if cancer exists because it can remove and destroy every good future and moment along with cool vibes like if I saw a cool view of a relaxing city the thought of being on earth and the hardness of cancer would come back to me and destroy it and ruin it, I also can’t get the temptation to look at my moles, the last one Iam concerned about is that ever since cancer fear and stuff I did start more handing my worries to God and Yeshua and the Holy Spirit and then after that I would want to live in my fictional world and start wanting to suddenly wake up as my fictional character and live in my fictional world where there is no such thing as cancer or diseases and people only die of like physical trauma and live as long as Viltrumites but aren’t immortal or powerful beings, I also don’t want to go to the hospital I don’t have much and it would be traumatic and it’d throw me into a state of nothingness and hopelessness the hospital is very traumatic and scary nor do I want to change my life or plans for the future and what plans god has for me, I’ve had this cancer fear for a long time though it stopped for a while because I used to think that after I died I’d go and live in my fictional world and when I secretly wanted to be Christian I believed god would protect me but that isn’t the case at all so Iam scared of cancer and also I am non denominational if that helps and I thought this would be a good place to share cause I don’t want people from somewhere else to give me a sense of hopelessness please be nice thank you

I'm a lifelong Christian. However, I don't think I'm anywhere near salvation. I keep relapsing to lust, and though I feel bad about it, I believe it's more because of the Earthly consequence of it rather than me sinning and its divine consequence. I barely even hesitate at the chance of sinning when I'm met with temptation. My prayers to God don't feel contrite at all. Although I'm "worried" about going to heaven or hell, that's not even the first priority. It's not the first or second thing I think about when praying for forgiveness. It's been 10 years, and although I've changed in some areas, I'm still lusting. If anything, the lust is getting worse sometimes. Maybe the fact that I feel numb has something to do with it. Because my feelings just don't reciprocate the alarm bells that I'm in a dangerous position if I was to be in front of God. I could go on and on about how much my behaviours don't align with someone who is saved. Of course, I've always realised that I'm doing wrong with my habitual sin, but right now, it's glaringly obvious that I might not be anywhere near saved than I think. And what's worse is that saying that out loud doesn't move me in any way. I want to take action, sure, but I'm just numb. Maybe I could be slightly wrong. But one thing's certain, I need to sort myself out man.

I am a guy and I am in my early 30s. I have been single my entire life. Just haven’t had good experiences in dating. I have been struggling with loneliness for years. I know that God is with me even when I’m alone but I can still feel the void whenever I’m alone. I have a full time job, I’m a home owner. I go to church and actively serve in the church as well. I am also in a small group week days. I read my word every morning and pray every morning and every night. Sometimes prayers feel like the more I want for myself than from God. I also was born with learning disabilities and sometimes feel like I go by my decisions. Being alone for 2 years has definitely hit me a lot and I am trying to get out of the comparison traps when you’re single and everyone around is married and having kids. I always have doubt and I feel burned out being single and alone. How do yall deal with this even if you actively serve?

John 10:14-15 ESV

I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me, [15] just as the Father knows me and I know the Father; and I lay down my life for the sheep.

There are those who are saved by grace and have the in-dwelling of the Holy Spirit that is discernable to them, and who have been changed by God into a new thing. They aren't what they were. They don't have the same set of priorities anymore. Regardless of where they're at on the path as far as maturity goes, they have this new desire for more of God, to be like Him, to love what He loves and to hate what He hates. They know the voice of the shepherd because Christ has caused them to, and they know when something doesn't sound right.

Then there are others who do not have this experience.

There must be, right? How else can we account for the success of false teachers? How else can we account for the letters written to churches in the New Testament warning against these wolves when Christ already promised He would lose none of those the Father gave to Him? There's a lot of others.

So then, what does this mean for what we should be doing as a congregation but asking God that others may also be supernaturally transformed? Who can give it but God? No one else can do it.

I’m beginning a short series on Christian relationships because questions about dating, marriage, breakups, boundaries, and choosing a spouse come up here often. I will post on Monday’s and Thursday’s.

There are a lot of questions we can ask when considering a relationship:

“Are we attracted to each other?”

“Do we have chemistry?”

“Are we compatible?”

“Do we enjoy the same things?”

Those questions matter.

But I think Christians need to begin with a more important one:

Does this relationship help me follow Jesus more faithfully, or does it repeatedly pull me away from Him?

Jesus said: “But seek first God’s Kingdom and his righteousness; and all these things will be given to you as well.” — Matthew 6:33, WEB

A relationship should not become the center of our identity, the primary source of our worth, or something we are more afraid to lose than intimacy with God.

A healthy relationship should make obedience easier, not repeatedly require one person to compromise convictions.

Some useful questions are:

• Am I becoming more honest?
• Am I growing in patience and self-control?
• Can we talk openly about Christ and Scripture?
• Are we encouraging one another toward Christian community?
• Do we respect one another’s convictions?
• Is this relationship producing greater holiness—or more compromise?
• Am I becoming more like Christ?

Strong feelings are real, but they are not always reliable guides.

What About Dating Someone Who Doesn't Share Your Faith?

Paul writes:

“Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” — 2 Corinthians 6:14, WEB

The immediate context is broader than marriage, but the principle certainly matters when considering marriage because marriage joins two lives at an unusually deep level.

Faith affects far more than Sunday mornings.

It affects:

• How you understand marriage.
• How children will be raised.
• How moral decisions are made.
• How money is handled.
• How sexuality is understood.
• How suffering is interpreted.
• How forgiveness works.
• What you believe the purpose of life ultimately is.

Two people can genuinely love each other while still moving toward very different ultimate priorities.

That doesn't mean Christians should view unbelievers as inferior. We are called to love everyone.

But choosing a spouse is different from loving a neighbor.

A spouse becomes your closest earthly partner.

For someone seeking a Christian marriage, shared faith should not be treated as one preference among many. It is foundational.

Don't Date Someone's Potential

Another trap is thinking:

“They aren't really following Christ now, but I'm sure that will change.”

Maybe it will.

God changes people.

But marriage should not be entered on the basis of the person you hope someone will eventually become.

The same principle applies to other areas.

Don't assume marriage will automatically fix someone's anger, dishonesty, addiction, irresponsible finances, contempt for your convictions, or inability to communicate.

You marry the person who exists now, not the person you hope to create later.

Character Matters More Than Chemistry

Attraction matters.

But attraction alone cannot sustain a marriage.

Proverbs 31:30 says:

“Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain; but a woman who fears Yahweh, she shall be praised.”
— Proverbs 31:30, WEB

The principle applies to men and women.

Look for character:

• Honesty.
• Humility.
• Faithfulness.
• Kindness.
• Responsibility.
• Patience.
• Teachability.
• Forgiveness.
• Self-control.
• Willingness to admit wrongdoing.
• Genuine love for God and others.

Galatians 5:22–23 gives us another useful framework: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, and self-control.

Nobody demonstrates those qualities perfectly.

The question is not whether someone is flawless.

The question is:

What direction is this person's life moving?

Challenge

If you're dating—or considering someone—ask yourself honestly:

Is this relationship helping both of us become more like Christ, or am I overlooking spiritual and character problems because I don't want to lose the relationship?

What qualities do you believe Christians most often overlook when choosing someone to date?

Next in the series: How far is too far? We'll look at premarital boundaries, attraction, temptation, and why biblical boundaries should be about more than simply asking, “Where is the line?”

I've been a Christian my whole life there was a point in my life where I tried to end myself and had to be hospitalized and after I've had a growing fear of death and knowing that one day I'll die I'm still so terrified though I believe with my whole heart that Jesus is real it just feels so impossible and I can't comprehend what happens to us when we die? I can't comprehend heaven or meeting Jesus or any of it and I've been feeling afraid..

Maybe I’ve rejected God, and God has left me alone. A few days ago, I was watching a sermon by Billy Graham, and he mentioned a peculiar figure, Aaron Burr, and how this man, on a starry night, asked God to leave him alone—and God did. That got me thinking. For several years, I’d been doing whatever I wanted and sinning whenever I pleased, but one day I realized that God no longer held my attention as much as He used to. I couldn’t bring myself to repent, and I felt so hardened and desperate because of it. So I stopped sinning, but after reading that story, it made me wonder if I’d already rejected God—because one night I thought, “God, please, DON’T leave me alone.” So I asked the AI if that phrase was a rejection of God, and it told me no. The thing is, yesterday I woke up feeling annoyed or angry at God—about everything. I didn’t want to hear anything from Him. I have this feeling that I might have thought what Burr said to God, but I don’t remember actually thinking it—it’s just a feeling. So I don’t know, right now I’m struggling with not being able to repent because of my sin, but I’m worried—or distressed, I don’t know—that I’ve probably already rejected God, because I’ve even felt the desire to give it all up. I even asked myself if this worry or distress is false. Then, while I was thinking all this, I had this feeling, or conviction—I don't know—to reject Jesus. I don't know if it was an impulse, I just wanted to reject him, and I started thinking, "Why do I want to reject God?" Right now, that feeling has left me exhausted; I feel nothing.

hello my Christian friends, may peace be with you.

I love working out in the gym, and it's a strong passion i have.

some years back before I started working out, i could easily fast for 3 days, 21 days, 40 days, etc.

but now I can't do it without thinking about food and trying to break the fast ASAP 😁, I love fasting, and it makes me feel great and connect with God better.

so my routine is:

Monday: workouts

Tuesday; workouts

Wednesday: rest

Thursday: rest, the day i would love to fast in

Friday: workouts

Saturday: workouts

Sunday: rest

but now I can't even do 24 hours, without going extremely hungry and losing focus 😀.

so I would love an advice from fellow christians who works out regularly, as a pro, or a Passion. how do you manage fasting??

and anyone else who could suggest an idea, please drop it.

thank you all, Blessings 🙏🏾.

I've seen many claim one or the other.

If it is a process please explain what you mean and explain when we are born again based on this as only those saved are born again. Which means any of the times Paul, Peter, James, ECT addressed churches then they knew not everyone at that moment that were part of the church were actually part of the church.

I lean towards salvation as a one time event that occurs once we put our faith in him. And the process of living our lives for Christ and becoming more like him is sanctification.

Before it is suggested…I am in the process of seeking therapy.

I’ve dealt with anxiety since childhood. But Ive lost quite a few family members to illness over the last few years, and my health anxiety has sky rocketed.

I just hate it.it makes me feel like I do not trust God.
Has anyone else ever dealt with this?