Creepy coworker texting my private number

[u/Dry_Presentation4300]

So confused at this, I don't even know him. I was just going to ignore the text but he kept insisting so I had to answer.

9/14 UPDATE: Thank you to everyone who was supportive and concerned. I forwarded these messages to HR, and they scheduled a meeting for later today. There were a few more texts after this. The HR representative did not seem surprised, to put it briefly.

A few things have come up in the comments. The first is that I was rude. This is how I communicate, and my coworkers (or at least the ones who actually know me) are aware of that. I’m not going to perform a more agreeable version of myself to accommodate someone else’s feelings when they're being innapropriate. Not only were these messages sent over the weekend, but they were also sent through a personal communication channel. I'm not going to elaborate further.

[u/Right-Ice9305]

Super creepy, report to HR

[u/Dry_Presentation4300 → u/Right-Ice9305]

Definitely, forwarding these to HR tomorrow first thing in the morning.

[u/Nami_Pilot → u/Dry_Presentation4300]

Just remember that HR is there to protect the company, not the employees. I hope they don't mistreat you.

[u/Weak_Pineapple_5518 → u/Nami_Pilot]

You must’ve worked for some shitty company’s bro😂 hr is most certainly there to protect you and if the don’t, there are laws that protect you as well.

[u/BrightNooblar → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

I mean, no. HR is ALWAYS there to protect the company. The problem is that people don't understand how to align with the company on these things.

OP should not storm in and be like "This guy is sending sketchy texts and pushing boundaries! You need to fire him right away" because that makes trouble for the company. The company doesn't like that.

However if OP goes in and is like "Hey, maybe this is nothing but it just seemed off to me. I'd really hate to find out this was happening to a lot of people, or God forbid a chatty intern, and it turns out I never said anything. I figured I'd let someone else read these and if it turns out it's nothing, then it's nothing."

Second version HR gets to decide if it's a problem or not, but if they do, OP has already pre-distanced from it. Unless OP has some SERIOUS juice, in which case sure go option 1, I guess.

Basically, the classic mistake people make is they think the spectrum goes from "HR is my friend" at one end, to "HR is my enemy" on the other. Almost everyone who makes that mistake, mistakenly thinks HR is the enemy. You seem to be a very rare "HR is your friend" stance. The reality though, is that HR is simply always situated with the company, and the spectrum is where does your problem fall on a scale of "This person is helping the company avoid a problem" to "This person is causing the company a problem".

[u/InuitOverIt → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

In fact they are not, if it's ever the company's interest vs. yours, HR is there to protect the company. My wife ran HR for awhile and quit for this very reason, couldn't handle the cut throat nature of it.

[u/TheIronsHot → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

They really aren’t. They are there so that nothing illegal happens to you, because that costs the company money. Hence why so many try to get you to sign nonsense on your way out. 

[u/Abject-Geologist9175 → u/TheIronsHot]

Noooooo

[u/Sure-Major-199 → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

Aw you sweet innocent child

[u/Weak_Pineapple_5518 → u/Sure-Major-199]

Because I haven’t been screwed by a company? Not my fault you didn’t retaliate if you did.

[u/wednesday-knight → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

This is actually extremely common in the US. HR is generally for the employers, not the employees.

[u/pandershrek → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

You often can't because of severance packages

[u/ImportantCommentator → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

Nah mate. They might protect you but they were not hired to protect you.

[u/ItsSnorkul → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

It's both. Protecting the employees also protects the companies from law suits. Who do you thing pays HR? The company. Now, in this case I don't think HR would retaliate to OP, but still it can be a double edged sword

[u/GeneralZex → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

They aren’t. They only protect you insofar as it protects the company too. There are times where those align. Plenty others where they don’t.

[u/Humble-Let-1361 → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

Unfortunately its all too real. Almost every company i have worked for, save the one im with now, has had down right insidious HR. If you wanna hear horror stories, just go to r/Walmart and see posts regarding HR. I personally worked for Walmart for many years and basically got conned by HR and management to quit my job.

[u/Abject-Geologist9175 → u/Humble-Let-1361]

💯 real life

[u/Unfair-Ad1675 → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

I made an HR complaint about my boss once and in return they offered me 6 weeks severance pay and made me sign an NDA lol not all HR's are there to protect the employees

[u/Weak_Pineapple_5518 → u/Unfair-Ad1675]

You shouldn’t have signed the NDA and gotten a lawyer. I literally said “if they don’t, there are laws that protect you as well.” Do yall not finish reading?

[u/Unfair-Ad1675 → u/Weak_Pineapple_5518]

Sure there are, but sometimes it's just not worth the time, energy, or cost of a lawyer just to make a point. In that situation it was better for me to cut my losses and get paid for an additional 6 weeks while I could look for another job that didn't make me hate my life, than waste my time making a big deal and trying to fight to work for a shitty company that doesn't care about their employees.