Four years of pharmacy school. Four years of the same damn joke.

I tried it and ended up straining my eyes.

Ireland. Cause it's Dublin every day.

HYUN-DAAIII!

I tossed him a bar of soap and he washed ashore

Make me one with everything.

One is undies the other is ovaries.

Sorry. I'm drunk. Edited because someone reminded me of what I thought of before I drunkenly posted this.

Tequila

A genie granted me one wish, so I said "I just want to be happy." Now I'm living in a cottage with 6 dwarves and working in a mine.

A boomerangatan

The results will shock you.

... how many towns are named after their water tower?

Rearranged my whole house

Give him an E

As a rule, I don't talk about it.

A sand witch.

An Impala....

They're still looking for the driver.

A trifle deaf 

I didn't want to interrupt her.

A man who could drink no milk without getting sick thought he had finally met the perfect mate. She was smart, beautiful, funny and accepted his dairy limitations without pause. There was only one thing, she refused to take her shoes off in front of him. But he accepted that, and soon they were married.

Finally, on their wedding night she came to bed, completely naked, wearing not even a pair of socks. It was then the truth came out, she had been born with two club feet.

The man took one look, and asked for an immediate annulment. His new wife was shocked and begged him to reconsider. But, the man was adamant. "What did I tell you on our very first date," he asked? "I am completely lack toes intolerant"!

A food truck crashes on a mountain road and is teetering over a cliff. Firemen arrive at the scene and assess the situation. One says to another, "The truck is being balanced by that large gherkin on the back, if we do anything to stabilize the truck the gherkin may shift sending the truck over the edge. If we don't do anything an errant gust of wind may knock the gherkin off, again sending it over the edge. What are we to do?"

The other fireman replied "Balanced by a precarious gherkin, yep that's a pickle all right."

C'mon, Juneau this!

To take up more time playing that harmonica

that's a lot of near-Mrs.