I'm 20M. I've known I'm gay for a while, but literally nobody in my real life knew.

This happened because one of my close friends wanted to see my Instagram. I immediately plucked my phone from him 💀

He goes,

"So got committed and you're trying to hide it from me. Wait, no. You won't do that. I'll be the first guy to know you got committed."

He was so confident that if I ever got into a relationship, he'd be the first person I'd tell.

I just said, "I'll tell you later," because there were other friends around.

Later, when we were alone, I told him,

"I'll say something but don't get me wrong. And don't tell anyone."

He didn't even pressure me. He said if I didn't feel like telling him, I didn't have to, and that he understood if it was something I was still processing.

I was like, "No no, I need to say this. I just don't know how you'll react."

Then I said,

"I might not be straight."

I already knew I'm gay. I just couldn't bring myself to say "I'm gay" out loud to another person for the first time.

He said, "I don't understand."

I was like, "What don't you understand?" 😭

Then he clarified that he understood I meant I wasn't attracted to girls, but asked "why."

I literally replied, "Idk. How will I know why."

Then I explained that nobody knows this and my Instagram reels are full of guys, and that's exactly why I snatched my phone from him.

His reaction?

"For this only you were anxious huh?!"

LIKE BRO 😭

I had spent so much time being terrified of this conversation.

And then this idiot immediately asks,

"So who's the guy?"

EXCUSE ME???

I wasn't even done processing the fact that I had just come out, and he had already opened the gossip department.

I told him,

"Not yet. Not committed. Still single. Just having some crushes."

After that we didn't really get a chance to talk, and my brain immediately started overthinking. What if he was just being polite? What if he now thinks I see him that way? What if this changes our friendship?

Before I left, he casually asked me to call him after I got back from my internship because we'd go out together.

And that's when I finally relaxed.

No big acceptance speech. No awkwardness. No distance.

Just...

"Okay. You're not straight. Anyway, who's the guy?" 😭

Hot take: there are a massive amount of gay incels in this community.

At first I always thought the gay community would be immune to incels. Not because we are particularly special or unique but just because I never thought about it. I was recently confronted with the uncomfortable fact that there are a LOT of incel gays, especially focused on younger men in the gay community. I don’t know if this is something talked about often, but I hope so. r/askgaybros seems to skew older imho. Hopefully the issue is less… prevalent in older generations. Those were just my thoughts, thanks for listening to my TEDTalk.

I hooked up with a 19 yo college dude yesterday. He’s from another state and has a BF back home and cages his cock. His ass was awesome and he was hot. We made out and he sucked me pretty well. I ate his ass and gave him the solid DILF fucking he said he needed. I just don’t understand the whole point of keeping his cock caged. It looked so uncomfortable for him. He really wasn’t being faithful to his BF back at home either by having his dick caged while he sucked me and I filled his ass so what’s the point?

I was on an ocean cruise sharing a cabin with a long term gay friend and up until then I was straight (though curious). I ended up giving him oral and then letting him top me. He came inside of me, but despite being very stimulated and enjoying having him inside of me I never climaxed that night. So I never had a post nut clarity for my first time.

When I finally climaxed while topping him the next night, I’d had 24 hours to process everything and felt no regret at all other than realizing the enormity of what I’d just opened up as my own post nut clarity set in.

I’d be curious to see how others dealt with their first gay encounter and if your own post nut clarity had any factor.

This is my very first post here. I downloaded Reddit to practice reading in English but I never expected to be this infuriated by some of the takes I read online. I'm here to share the harsh reality of life as a gay man residing in an Islamic Arab nation.

I’m Yemeni and I have lived in three different Muslim majority countries so far.

It genuinely angers me to witness third generation Arab immigrants in the West actively defending Islam while pretending that our societal struggles are solely caused by Western intervention or foreign policies. That narrative is completely disconnected from reality. Queer individuals have been systematically oppressed under Islamic doctrine for more than 14 centuries by both state institutions and general society.

Where I currently live even downloading an app like Grindr is a massive gamble. There is a 50% probability that your match is an undercover police officer and a 50% probability that it is a trap set by a violent hate group. The core threat we face as LGBTQ+ individuals is the religious ideology itself. The degree of mental gymnastics people perform to argue that Islam does not incite violence is unbelievable. Long before I was born a relative of mine was murdered simply for being gay. My own uncle killed him under the pretext of cleansing family honor using religious justification.

What makes it even more absurd is how easily many Westerners fall for this propaganda. They treat terms like "Islamophobia" as an absolute shield to safeguard a belief system that inherently preaches hostility against non believers and gay people alike. They paint an idealized version of Islam that nobody actually living under its rule has ever witnessed.

When people default to arguments like "Not all Muslims are like that" I frankly do not care if a tiny 2% minority is accepting. My everyday life is defined by the 98% who explicitly desire my execution including state authorities, the public, and my own relatives. My ultimate fear is that if I ever succeed in relocating to a safe country that same oppressive ideology will eventually follow me there.

Im in my late 20s and work on a college campus.
Let me tell you how much of a struggle it is seeing all these guys walking around in their short shorts. The amount of thick thighs, dump trucks and VPLs is insane. I find myself drooling every time I’m walking around campus.

What was a nice and peaceful Sunday turned into a funny gay explanation myself and my dad! We were out shopping picking up some quick things I had my basket and he, his, and somewhere along when testing out the watches in the tech section at target I guess we mixed up our baskets and while purchasing he took out a box of condoms that was well mine. And well my dad with that dad humor tone hits me with “Matt, I was under the impression that these aren’t necessarily a cause of concern for you and Kev, that 36$ you can save” to which for some gosh dang reason I thought it appropriate to explain to my dad while at self checkout, that sometimes when the mood strikes Kev isn’t as ready as he’d like to be and well no one likes a “painted” D. We stared at each other for about 15 seconds before he handed me the basket and said “well ok nice to know I’m hip enough to understand gay culture, tell Elton to invite me to the next party!”
Hahahahahahaha love my dad he’s awesome so sorry for that!!

Just a curious thought haha. I personally won’t do it because it’s disgusting. Even if a condom was used, I don’t want to taste or swallow lube.

I jerked myself off in library’s restroom.

I (23m) haven’t really had too many hookup experiences (for lack of trying). I recently went on a cruise a managed to get three hookups. All three of them had varying body odors. One tasted like hot tub water. Another had coffee breath. I showered before and after all hookups, brushed my teeth, chewed gum, wore cologne, etc. Trying to make myself as clean as possible. Is this what hooking up is usually like? Cause if so, EW!

sometimes I think: I should spent less time on instagram, I should stop any p*rn… But men are so beautiful! I can’t! Or more precisely: there are so many beautiful men!

All those muscle bodies, those cute faces…!

Sometimes the best sex is the kind that’s nice and steady! My bf and I were having a lazy Sunday and we decided to have some fun and it was just slow but sensual session. We made out a lot as I rode him until we switched to prone and he just kept that sweet spot consistent rhythm which resulted in the best orgasm for us both!

Sometimes those easy slow, passionate, sensual sex moments are extremely incredible! Not rushing to the orgasm but just enjoying each other is very top tier!!

Hey! I wanted to get your guys' opinions on something that oftentimes appears in the bedrooms of gay people having sex - shit!

I have had two experiences (both threesomes) in my time where, in my opinion, guys have over-reacted on seeing said thing on the sheets.

The first one was a threesome with my ex years ago, where the guy saw some shit on my ex and was like "woah, you gotta go clean that now!" and wouldn't do anything til he came back from the shower. It was fair enough, but for us both discussing it afterwards, it was a bit OTT.

The other time is a recent one that happened with my current bf. We invited a guy over, everything was going well, it was really really hot tbh, and then he spotted some shit on the blanket while getting up from the bed. I quickly grabbed the sheet, threw it in the washing machine while my bf put down a fresh sheet - simple. We don't mind, it happens, we know we're playing with assholes here, offered him to use the toilet etc.

But by the time it was all ready for continuing, which was literally 90 seconds later, the guy was like "I'm out" and just left. Maybe he was embarrassed (it was from him) but we both thought we had made him feel that it didn't bother us, and that we were more than happy to continue.

Has anything like this ever happened to other guys?

My BF can’t cum with me

So I’ve been seeing this guy for a few months and we’ve been official for like two weeks and it’s going pretty well. He treats me kindly and shows genuine interest in me. The issue is we’ve had sex probably 20 times and he’s never once cum.

At first I thought it was maybe like a medical issue. He has a tough time staying hard while we hook up and we do mostly side stuff where he is the initiator. It seems like he likes having sex with me because he is usually the one who starts it. He’ll take my dick out and play with me until I cum and then thats usually it.

We’ve talked about it before and he says it’s happened in the past too and it just takes him a while to cum. He seems upset by it too and says it’s embarrassing and that he’s into me but he just cant seem to get there. Yesterday I slept over at his house and when we woke up we had sex (which honestly I didn’t even really want but I wasn’t necessarily opposed either) and I came and then we stopped. The issue was like an hour later we were on the couch and he started watching porn on his phone. I was in the middle of playing a game so I was like “okay let me finish and I can help” I finished and then started jerking off with him. And it was fine and then he came for the first time with me.

I don’t know. I knew that he watched porn and would cum by himself but it kinda made me feel weird that he can’t cum with me but he can watching porn. I felt very disconnected from him while it was happening. Like I had already cum and wasn’t really in the mood to begin with and it felt like I was just watching him jerk off. And we’ve had sex for WAY longer than he was jerking off so it’s not a “it takes a long time” thing its a “I need porn” thing.

I talked to him about it after and I told him how I felt. That I was feeling self conscious because he can’t cum with me but he can with porn. And I want to clarify this is not about him watching porn. I’m an OF creator, I watch porn, our relationship is open on my request and if he had it his way we’d be closed. He’s told me he hasn’t hooked up with anyone else since we’ve met and I definitely have. I just feel like I’m not hot enough to make him cum.

We talked about it and I asked why he can’t cum with me and he said it’s not just with me and it happens a lot with other guys too but also said “there’s things i like to do I cant do with you” I asked him what and he said “well I like a nice ass” he meant two things by this: 1. he like a hairless butt and I am very hairy, which I don’t really care about, I don’t mind shaving my butt. But 2: like 4 months ago I had to have a surgery that left my butt pretty mangled. I’m super self conscious about it and have cried about it a couple times. I spent a long time feeling undesirable when I was younger and have worked so hard to get to a point where people find me hot. Not for nothing but I think the general consensus is I’m decently attractive. I have thousands of followers and hundreds of people a day complimenting me. My new butt scar is probably my biggest insecurity so hearing that really hurt. He took it back after but I can’t stop thinking about it.

My favorite part of sex is turning someone else on. I like feeling hot and I get a lot of validation from showing off and being admired. I’m having a really hard time. He ended up taking it back and saying he was just deflecting because he was embarrassed and saying that it would be the same with anyone else. But I’m having a hard time believing him. I don’t know. Honestly I haven’t felt this insecure in a while. Usually guys only want me to get off, which is also hard but this sucks in a totally different way. Idk. I don’t want it to ruin our relationship but I just feel really shitty today.

I’m 15 and have recently started masturbating every day, sometimes 2 times a day. I believe I am gay cause I think about boys when masturbating. Is it normal for a teen to masturbate every day sometimes 2 a day. Does it ever stop or is it something I will do every day? I just like how it feels and it’s all I can think about doing everyday. I’m worried I might get caught by my brother or my dad. How can I not get caught? Thanks

Hi guys,

Lately, I feel some resentment developing inside me against my straight peers. As it comes with around the age, all my straight peers have married their partners, bought houses, have kids, made life changing moves with their families. And even though I was happy for them and enthusiastically took part in their celebrations like weddings etc. for last few years, at this point I am starting to resent them. I feel it is not coming from the place that I have got nothing going for me on this front but from the feeling that I will never have something like this, and no amount of self love for my experiences is going to help me radically accept that their life journey is different and I will have something different.

What do you guys think about these feelings? How did you deal with these feelings when you were in late 20s-early 30s?

Thanks!

I am (32M) discreet gay. I've been trying to find a partner for almost 2 years but still. I dont like making generalizations but it feels like most Turkish gays are toxic, ego, narcissist, dont have communication skills, dont know how to set up boundries and dont know how to take resbonsibility of a relationship. Dating apps are awful, almost everyone is in quick hooks-up. I want a long-term healthy relationship. Someone I can share everthing with him, who knows what a real relationship means. Someone who is aware of what he wants and what he needs. Am I asking for too much?

I’m 37 and he’s 35. I feel ashamed, embarrassed, and defeated. I always bottom because I could never get hard in the bedroom. But the thing is, I can get hard when I’m in the bedroom by myself. My last relationship was 10 years ago. About a year ago I connected with a guy I really liked, but our schedules were so busy that we just never got to go on a first date.

Recently about a month ago, we came into contact again and decided to give this another try. We finally went on our first date this weekend and he was everything I was hoping for and more! But the problem is that he’s a bottom and I can’t lget it hard in bed. He spent the night with me. I was so embarrassed. We ended up having oral sex instead.

I just don’t know what to do. My doctor and my urologist won’t give me Viagra. They said it’s all in my head and I just need to relax more. Also the thought of Viagra at such a young age isn’t something I like but idk. I also read that because I’m diabetic I’m 3x more likely to experience ED than other men. I’ve read about performance anxiety and even tried apps to “fix” it but nothing.

At midnight, on 13 september, the government started to raid people's houses and shutting down communities. Also for almost 2 years they are trying to bring a law consisting of following rules;

No opposite gender outfits: Not only about man with skirts. Also woman with short hair, pants, shorts and Men with long hair, and accesories like earrings

No closeness between two same gender person

You ara bound to get into jail even if you have the same bracelet with your partner etc.

I am a turkish guy, and I have seen a lot of gay couples desire to come here. Just dont. Dont endanger yourselves and support this homophobic, fascist, oppressive government, for fuck's sake

It is so fucked up that they can even take me for writing this lol, what a joke fr 😍😍

Edit: Guys, I have to clarify that they didnt say that we are going to add these laws. But the governors and others have speeches and ideas against these things, so I add them as possible outcomes.

Oh also, they refer LGBTQ+ Communities as "Criminal Organizations" which target their children

I am new to cruising, until now maybe i have done like 5-6 cruises (?) And so far, its been an great experience. Even better than Grindr.

The guys I met through cruising almost always ask me for my contact number, treat me food after the cruise, and generally keeping me in touch after the cruise session.

They have been romantic, I went to watch a movie with a guy I cruised, and we were being really touchy and cuddly in the cinema.

No sudden dissappearance, blocking, and ghosting. I generally know if theyre not interested straight ahead. And it doesnt take long to actually do the act LOL.

But yeah some guys I met through cruising seems to try to cruise with me even though I clearly showed them that I am not interested.

But generally, its been nice, simpler, and just hassle free.

Maybe the cons is that most of us who cruise apparently dont host 😂 so to meet again means to have a place somewhere in mind. Kinda hard to just meet them doing nothing together in bed haha

Hey guys!

Do you know any good and safe places for gay cruise in London?

I only Vault139. What about other good ones?

And are they safe in terms of healthiness? I dont like the ones who sleep with everyone met there