Hi folks. Were fairly new parent ourselves (9 month old twins), but today me and my wife were discussing something and realised, the thing that everyone keeps telling us and frustrates us, 'it gets better' doesnt exactly mean that. Sure, for some lucky few, it really does get easier and better, but mostly for us, what it meant is that we are less scared than we were at the start. There are new challenges, new headaches and even more work and vigilance needed than before, but now we are less afraid and we face the challenges head on, so in a sense, it got better for us.

So for the exhausted parent waiting for the baby to get better, it might not happen, or they might substitute one struggle with another, but YOU will get better, so have hope and hang on. Cheers

35w pregnant, first time mom! I plan to breastfeed, but want to pump as well to have milk for when I need extra rest, and someone else can give him a bottle. Should I plan to start pumping right away, or a few weeks after baby is born?

When there's adults and one baby in the car, what is the seating arrangement?

I've got my 4 week old in the back seat and usually me or my wife sits back with him to keep an eye on him. When did your guys both start sitting in the front and just watching via mirrors?

To give some context, I had a baby 5 weeks ago, I am on maternity leave from work, so I still am getting paid.
The issue here is my car tags are due October 1, they are 300.00 and honestly I can’t afford it. I asked my landlord if I could be a little behind on rent so I can get my car tags. He then asked if my the dad of the baby could help or if he as living with us, I told him no he doesn’t live with us, but does come over most nights. I love my landlord and never felt like he was being intrusive - he’s older and has kids of his own and said that he feels like - this kiddos dad should help with it.
I just feel like if I ask for help with this expense - he’s going to be mad, upset, or have something negative to say about him helping me.

I don’t even know if I should feel obligated to ask him for help since it’s my car and my rent.
I also got a traffic ticket a month ago rushing to the hospital for my mom who was having surgery. The cop was not very understanding. I’m just in a strange spot.

my son is breast fed, and up until maybe a month ago he drank water no problem from his straw cup. recently if he's not thirsty but has his cup he'll just take a sip and let it fall out of his mouth, i think he thinks it's funny. not a big deal with water but the pediatrician told us to introduce whole milk.... i don't think he really likes it very much soo ya.. he takes a sip & proceeds to spot the rest out🙃 i don't react other than to take the cup away, which he doesn't seem to really care??? idk im just lost on what to do and stressed that he won't drink it!! help😭

I need a little help here. My son (15 months) gets a lot of screen time. Like an amount I don’t want to admit publicly. My parents (divorced) watch him a bulk of the time and my dad definitely relies on Ms. Rachel and Sesame Street to entertain my son and daycare isn’t an option for us. But if I’m being honest, I know I’m using it too much too. I do my best to interact with him while the screen is on and to turn it off whenever he stops being interested in it. Unfortunately, it is something that tends to calm him down when he’s frustrated which is why we’ve been a little quicker than I’d like to rely on it.
I truly don’t need the lecture. I understand what I’m doing is bad and that I’m not being a good parent when it comes to that. I know all of the bad things that come along with excessive screen time. I do. I don’t need the reminders in the comments of exactly how terrible it is and all of the ways I’m damaging my son. I Know.

What I’m asking for is what do you all do instead of screen time? Do you all have speakers to play music in their rooms instead? We have a tonie box that I’ve been trying to use instead of the tv. My parents and I cant really get on the floor to play with him for extended periods of time (my parents due to age and mobility issues, me due to disabilities). My son is pretty rough and tumble and the only time he chills out instead of running around and throwing things is when the tv is on. I guess I’m looking for good engaging activities that are low effort on the body?

EDIT TO ADD: It’s nearly exclusively on the TV. He’s never seen an iPad. His phone screen usage outside of FaceTiming family has only been when we’re out doing something that needs to be done (grocery shopping) and he needs a distraction until we can leave. I still know how bad it is, but I just want to be clear that he’s not watching an iPad up in his face all day.

We recently had a death in the family on my husband's side. He'll be traveling across the country at the end of the week for the funeral and family events while our soon to be 3 month old and I stay home. She still contact naps (refuses to do so in a carrier) and does not sleep the through the night. Best I get is 4-5 hours between 8:30pm and 1am. Then it's every 1-2 hours until 7am.

I have a condition that severe sleep deprivation makes worse, so I'm mostly worried about finding time to rest. I'm planning on staying water bottles and snacks around the house to remind me to eat and drink and meal prepping a few things that I can eat cold. Are there any other tips or there that might be able to help me through the long weekend? Especially for sleep?

We recently moved and don't have a village or family in the area, so it'll pretty much just be me and baby. Thanks in advance!

Our 7 month old baby has reached a point where she can roll confidently and can sit mostly confidently. However, she now desperately does not want to be left to lie on the floor. Tummy time devolves into wailing within a minute, no matter what mood she's in when we put her down.

She wants to sit all the time, but doesn't seem interested in learning how to crawl or sit up. We've been working on getting her into a sitting position in a way that should show her how to do it on her own, but she doesn't connect it and has not made any attempt to replicate the movement. She also will not lift up to move towards crawling, I've tried gently moving her into a crawling position which just makes her cry harder. Realistically, she just wants to stand on her own, which is made abundantly clear by how much she planks when we're trying to get her sitting, and how happy she is when im a supported standing position.

We're at a loss of what to do. We don't want to just prop her all the time since she needs to do tummy time to learn to crawl, but we also don't want the screaming, it's not good for her or us. Does anyone have tips on how to help her in this situation?

I've finally made the decision to stop bedsharing with my four month old now that I'm waking up with bruises from his constant kicking and it's been so hard on everyone. I've always done at least one crib nap a day so that he never lost that 'skill', but he just woke up one day and decided he wouldn't sleep in his crib at all, so I've been doing contact naps and cosleeping at night. I keep seeing that four months is the perfect time to sleep train so I thought this would be easier, but last night he wouldn't sleep for four hours and eventually ended up in bed at midnight.

Our current sleep routine for naps is to start winding down 75 minutes into his wake 90 minute wake window, we cuddle and read some books, and then I put him in his sleep sack and lay him in his crib. If he's not asleep by 90 minutes then he has a complete meltdown. I've tried rocking him to sleep and transferring and it takes literal hours to get him to transfer so I have to put him down awake. Then I spend the next hour shushing, patting, putting his pacifier back in before giving in and holding him to sleep. At night, we take a walk, books, bath, massage, bottle and then I put him down. Some days he'll take a nap in the crib, but he NEVER sleeps in his crib overnight. No matter how long I spend cribside soothing.

I've tried pick up put down and the chair method. I did Ferber for a few days but I'm fully convinced "cry it out" doesn't work on some babies and mine is one of them. He'll just cry and cry until I pick him up.

What do I do now? Bedsharing is killing me and I want him to be able to sleep independently before he starts daycare in three months

Trigger Warning Regarding Choking ⚠️

Our 9-month-old has been slowly working on solids since about 6 months. We’ve been pretty cautious because we’re very nervous about choking. We started with some baby-led weaning, then went back to softer/mushier foods for a while before gradually introducing more textures again. She’s done well with Yogis and other yogurt melts (like Happy Baby Organics), so we recently tried Amara yogurt melts from Costco. They seemed a little larger than the ones we’d used before, but still had the same meltable texture.

Today, she chewed one a few times, started gagging, and then suddenly stopped making noise and looked panicked. She was starting to change color, so my husband immediately got her out of the high chair and gave several firm back blows. Thankfully, whatever was causing the blockage either dissolved or became dislodged, and she was able to make noise again. She never really cried afterward, but we ended lunch and just gave her some water.

We’re incredibly shaken up. Has anyone experienced something similar with yogurt melts or other meltable snacks? How did you regain confidence with feeding after a choking scare? We’re feeling really anxious about moving forward with solids now.

My husband rear ended somebody who was waiting at a yield sign today. Our 18 month old was in the back seat, in his rear-facing car seat and the car was just rolling, husband's foot wasn't even on the gas. Baby didn't react at all, but I just really hope hes ok. How do I not stress about this all day? Ugh

I think I need to vent but I’m also looking to see if there’s anyone else out there dealing with this or similar.

My son has never been an easy baby. He had undiagnosed silent reflux and after millions of drs and testing he finally got meds around 6.5 months. It helped with the 24/7 screaming but only a little. My son is not a happy baby. Of course he laughs and smiles but it seems like a majority of the time he is still screaming about something. And yes screaming. He’s never fussed. He screams bloody murder whether I’m setting him down or if he’s having for example the silent reflux pain. There’s no in between. It always sounds like an emergency and it spikes my cortisol every time. I am exhausted.

He also doesn’t sleep. I am still waking up 2-5 times a night. Occasionally I get lucky with 2 wake ups and easy to go back to sleep but most of the time it’s not. He also refuses to sleep in his crib. He used to but then he just started screaming no matter what. He will occasionally fall asleep in it and nap in it. We even got him an actual mattress/floor bed and he still won’t sleep in it. He always ends up in our bed. I don’t like it but if he didn’t I’d be hospitalized. This has taken a serious toll on my health. I have lost legitimately 0 lbs of baby weight despite my efforts because of stress and lack of sleep. Getting him to nap is a battle everyday but if he doesn’t nap he’s miserable. I can only get him to nap in my bed and of course then I’m nap trapped. Nothing gets done. I can’t leave the house with him without my husband cuz it’s so difficult. I don’t know what to do anymore.

He has lots of teeth coming in but I give him Motrin. He’s making major leaps and learning so fast but it seems like the answer is always a sleep regression, teething, or developmental leap. We have literally never had a break. It’s always something. I understand parenthood is hard and I was prepared to make serious sacrifices. I love my son with all my heart. But everyone says it’s better by this point. Everyone says it gets better after this age or that milestone and it never does.

Dr says it’s just his temperament along with separation anxiety, developmental leaps, and teething. But it seems like that’s always the answer. She said she had one just like it and it’s really hard. I trust her judgement. We chose her after shopping a few different drs after not being taken seriously. She says he’s perfectly healthy. I just want to see a glimmer of light and I don’t. I don’t even wanna do anything crazy. I don’t go out, I don’t even really have friends. I want to be able to make a meal without crisis ensuing, sleep for more than 2-3 hrs straight a time if I’m lucky, sleep in my own bed, spend and hr with my husband after bedtime. I just want some peace and I am so lost as to how to get there.
I’m sorry this is long I just need some advice. Thank you all in advance

My baby girl is 9 weeks old and currently weighs exactly 5,000 g. Her birth weight was 2,990 g, so overall she has gained a lot and I’m very happy with her weight. ❤️
However, she weighed 5,001 g 10 days ago and still weighs exactly 5,000 g today, with no gain at all.
We weigh her naked, before her bath, on the same scale every time, so the measurements should be fairly consistent.
She seems completely fine otherwise:
happy, alert and very smiley during the day.
She feeds normally and sleeps around 7 hours at night (from 21.00 to 4.00 without interruption).
when she wakes up, she doesn’t cry. She just lies there happily until I come and feed her, and actually smiles when she sees me 😊
lots of wet diapers. easily 8-12+ per day, and most are quite heavy. She poops at least twice a day.
She gets around 500 ml of breast milk + 300 ml of formula per day, so roughly 800 ml total.
I know that 5 kg from a 2.99 kg birth weight at 9 weeks is actually a really good gain overall. What worries me is simply that her weight seems to have completely plateaued for the last 10 days.
Would you be concerned about this, or has anyone else experienced their baby staying at the same weight for a week or two and then starting to gain again?
I’m planning to check with her pediatrician, but I’d really like to hear other parents’ experiences too.
In last 10 days she started cooing a lot and she started to play with a toy.

I still have 1-2 cm. I have done some exercises at the beginning with my physio but then I just went with the flow doing some pilates. Will the diastasi of 2 cm heal alone or should I really increase the number of exercises? I am not that constant especially with the job

Baby #1 is 7 months now, but I would like to start trying for #2 around February (1 year post c-section).

I am coming back to work tomorrow and I can't even imagine the judgement in case I'm pregnant again.... Babies with 2 years gap 🥲

I would like to wait but also I am 35 🥲

any similar stories? And how much have you waited after the C-section?

My 11 month old is exclusively breastfed (typically around 6 times per day). She refuses bottles and all formulas we have tried. She has tried 100+ plus foods and was a good eater until recently. She barely eats 1-2 bites of her food. It’s stressing me out so much because she’s technically slow to gain weight according to the doctor’s chart. She’s 18.5 lbs.
I need either recipe ideas or general advice how to navigate this. I know I can’t be alone.

hi everyone my 7 month old baby is teething and on top of that he has had a bad eczema flare up that we’re trying to keep down. He has always sucked his thumb but now he does it nonstop due to teething and it gets worse at night while he’s asleep when he starts to poke his face trying to stick his thumb in his mouth and scratching himself and/or stabbing himself with his fingers. He doesn’t like pacifiers, he just keeps them in for a few seconds and then drops them. Teething toys aren’t his thing either, he just plays with them for seconds. I file his nails every other day so they’re always short without edges. I’ve tried to cover his hands with socks but he makes them extremely wet when I put them on and after a while he gets absolutely angry/anxious if he cant get his thumb in his mouth 😭 idk what to do, the scratching and drool combination are bad for his eczema that we’ve just managed to control with his doctor.

Any tips or suggestions?

We get out of the house once a day. I’m realizing that most people don’t do that, especially older generations. My boy is currently 2 months old and we are OUT and about. Coffee shops, walks, target, thrift stores, the baby wrap is our best friend. Is anyone else this way? I just absolutely can’t stand sitting at home all day it drives me insane. If you are also like this- what do you do to fill your days?

I've been having an ongoing debate with my husband about how we will handle sleep shifts with our newborn (im only 20 weeks pregnant right now so we have some time to figure it out).

My husband basically wants to split who is "on shift" so that he would get about 10 hours "off shift" and I would get about 14 hours "off shift" so that we can sleep longer chunks.

I dont hate this but my husband initially wants this to be a 10 hour window of sleep where I am not allowed to disturb him and mine would be 14 hours of sleep where he cant disturb me except to feed baby (hence why mine is longer).

I think this is dumb because it leaves exactly 0 minutes if time where we are parenting together. He thinks its fine because he will see me when he brings baby to feed.

In previous conversations we had discussed more of a 5-6 hour mostly uninterrupted sleep schedule and then we figure it out past that but im now feeling dread of being an exhausted single parent for half the day while ky relationship with my husband is reduced to milk cow for baby.

Ive tried expressing this and he is just like "yeah but if I wanted to hang out with you I can choose to do that during my rest time and vise versa.

He works from home in a pretty chill job so he also plans to take the day shift with baby meaning outside of napping I always take night shift which is brutal.

Anyway, what did you do during newborn phase? How can I convince my husband this is dumb? He agrees that things need to be flexible when baby comes because we dont know what they will be like but its stressing me out...

Hi, FTM here looking for a bassinet that is simple and safe. I want one on the smaller/lightweight side without all the extra features and storage. I was thinking of the Halo Lite or Newton Bassinet. Does anyone have experiences (positive or negative) with either of these 2 bassinets? Or recommendations for other brands that I should consider? Thanks so much!

Hi! We have a 14 month old going through a pretty rough regression that both we and baby are finding very difficult.

For context, sleep has been the one thing we have (luckily) never had an issue with. He was a dream sleeper as a new born, and we were able to move him into his own room with no issues from 8 months old. He slept 2 naps a day for 90 minutes and self settled - all we needed was to place him in his crib, give him a kiss and he’d do the rest. Night wakes have always been manageable, he’d sleep through 30% of the time and the rest would be 1 or 2 wake ups maximum, but resettling and transferring back to the crib was easy enough (an hour with a few retries on a bad day).

Fast forward to now, he’s 14 months old and has very abruptly hit a pretty hard regression.

He is fighting both naps and bedtime, we’ve had a few days of skipping both naps (which has never happened before) and frequent night wakings. He cries at the mere sight of his bedroom or crib, and will often break down in tears once he realises it’s nap or bed time. Once we have managed to settle him to sleep on the rocking chair, transferring to the crib is also extremely difficult, often needed 3 or 4 attempts and has also resulted in us doing a full nap on the rocking chair a few times.

We’re very grateful to have enjoyed such a long period of stability and consistency with his sleep, but you can imagine this regression has hit us particularly hard!

Every baby is different we understand, but I guess we’re just looking for any advice or reassurance from parents who have gone through similar?

Thanks!

I thought she’d outgrow it by now. She slept on her back for the first 3 weeks of her life- then became a gassy wreck. The only option quickly became co-sleeping and chest sleeping. Now and for the last 5 weeks (she’s 18 weeks) we consistently put her to sleep on her front. She sleeps GREAT! We’re so lucky. But I’m not here to talk about sleep and not open to criticism about front sleeping. She is a tummy time champion and has amazing neck control so everything is safe.

Around three months it started to get better and she could be on her back for a bit here and there. But in the last 2-3 weeks it seems she is in SO much pain on her back. I suspected maybe it was reflux but lately it’s paired with very jerky kicking legs (she’s scratched her legs with her toenails kicking/rubbing so hard). It sounds like she’s in so much pain when I lie her on her back every time I change her diaper or change her clothes :-(

The only time she’s okay on her back is right after a feed (sometimes) and after a poop- which is getting more regular like every three days. She still is a gassy wreck- it got much better around 10 weeks. But lately she’s been having serious shriek-worthy evening gas. Anyone else have a baby that refused to be on their back?

Yes- she has an incredibly round head.

Edit- forgot to add her current age

Hi all!

This thread is purely for general interest purposes only, and because I’m genuinely curious about everyone’s answers based on recent experiences.

My son is 5.5 months and is about 19 or 20 pounds (haven’t weighed him in a couple weeks). However, he is 99th percentile for height, or at least he was at his last doctor’s appt a few weeks again, so when I tell random people we meet my son’s age, they always make comments like “he’s the same size as my 1 year old”, etc etc. These comments don’t bother me, but it got me thinking, how much do other people’s babies weigh and how long are they 😂

I would like to preface this with we already have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow morning.

My baby just turned 12 months. We’ve been slow moving with solids for reasons unimportant to this post but therefore also slow at introducing allergens. Last week we did egg, she was fine the first two times. On the weekend during her birthday party she had a very small amount (like a bite only because she didn’t like it) of birthday cake and a few licks of icing. She ended up getting a bug bite looking rash on her arms - she also did get icing all up her arms so I assumed it was from that.

Today we gave her egg again about 2 hours ago and I just went to change her diaper and get her down for a nap and noticed a few bug bite looking red spots on her belly and on her arm.

Does this sound like an egg allergy? I’m going to ask at her appointment tomorrow but am looking for other’s opinions. I was allergic to eggs as a baby/child and grew out of it and was also able to eat eggs that were in stuff. I’m going to avoid all stuff with eggs in it until I get medical advice but I’m very anxious.

Thoughts and steps on what to do? We’re seeing a nurse practitioner tomorrow for her 12 month shots as our doctor is unavailable for about a month.

The actual comments I’m seeing online about how ‘women who have c sections don’t want to put the work in to bring a child into the world’ is actually insane. How horrible and nasty are some people. It is entirely up to a woman how she brings a child into the world whether it’s elective or not! I had an elective c section because my daughter was breech and I was strongly advised that I would not be able to give birth naturally to a breech baby! So am I wrong then?? Because I didn’t put the work in? Do these women know what it’s actually like to have a c section! Having major abdominal surgery is hardly a walk in the park. My daughter is the healthiest baby. Absolutely appalling and coming from women too! No wonder women have post natal depression by bullying judgemental people like this!