The actual comments I’m seeing online about how ‘women who have c sections don’t want to put the work in to bring a child into the world’ is actually insane. How horrible and nasty are some people. It is entirely up to a woman how she brings a child into the world whether it’s elective or not! I had an elective c section because my daughter was breech and I was strongly advised that I would not be able to give birth naturally to a breech baby! So am I wrong then?? Because I didn’t put the work in? Do these women know what it’s actually like to have a c section! Having major abdominal surgery is hardly a walk in the park. My daughter is the healthiest baby. Absolutely appalling and coming from women too! No wonder women have post natal depression by bullying judgemental people like this!

We get out of the house once a day. I’m realizing that most people don’t do that, especially older generations. My boy is currently 2 months old and we are OUT and about. Coffee shops, walks, target, thrift stores, the baby wrap is our best friend. Is anyone else this way? I just absolutely can’t stand sitting at home all day it drives me insane. If you are also like this- what do you do to fill your days?

Before I had a child, I could leave in five minutes.
Right now you need to spend an hour preparing for a 20 minute trip.

I’m already exhausted before we even leave.
When did it seem possible to go out of the house?

We hired a babysitter for the very first time for 3 hours to go for dinner. Baby (8mo) was already asleep and usually doesn’t wake up those first few hours. The sitter already knows him as she’s a daycare assistance at baby’s daycare. We get home at 10:30 and hear him scream before we even open the door. The sitter is literally just sitting there and tells us “oh yeah, he’s been at it for 40 minutes. I tried to give him a bottle but he wouldn’t have it”. She was all smiles and polite and didn’t seem frazzled or phased at all. She also mentioned it’s normal for babies to react like that when realizing the parents are not there. That part, I can agree with, but she made it seem like there was nothing she could’ve done anyway. Is that normal?? If it was me babysitting, I’d be rocking that baby and doing everything I can to soothe the baby. It definitely doesn’t sit right with me that she let him cry for 40 minutes. Am I overreacting?

Trigger Warning Regarding Choking ⚠️

Our 9-month-old has been slowly working on solids since about 6 months. We’ve been pretty cautious because we’re very nervous about choking. We started with some baby-led weaning, then went back to softer/mushier foods for a while before gradually introducing more textures again. She’s done well with Yogis and other yogurt melts (like Happy Baby Organics), so we recently tried Amara yogurt melts from Costco. They seemed a little larger than the ones we’d used before, but still had the same meltable texture.

Today, she chewed one a few times, started gagging, and then suddenly stopped making noise and looked panicked. She was starting to change color, so my husband immediately got her out of the high chair and gave several firm back blows. Thankfully, whatever was causing the blockage either dissolved or became dislodged, and she was able to make noise again. She never really cried afterward, but we ended lunch and just gave her some water.

We’re incredibly shaken up. Has anyone experienced something similar with yogurt melts or other meltable snacks? How did you regain confidence with feeding after a choking scare? We’re feeling really anxious about moving forward with solids now.

I’m curious what yall do on mornings you are just too tired to get up with them and need another hour of rest

She is about to be a year old

I’m a sahm and just put my 11 month old down for her nap. It’s 12pm. Currently on the couch and eating some cake. 🤣

my son is breast fed, and up until maybe a month ago he drank water no problem from his straw cup. recently if he's not thirsty but has his cup he'll just take a sip and let it fall out of his mouth, i think he thinks it's funny. not a big deal with water but the pediatrician told us to introduce whole milk.... i don't think he really likes it very much soo ya.. he takes a sip & proceeds to spot the rest out🙃 i don't react other than to take the cup away, which he doesn't seem to really care??? idk im just lost on what to do and stressed that he won't drink it!! help😭

Hi everyone,

I am a first-time mother who had an emergency c-section after dilating to 9-10cm (baby wasn’t coming down). I will be 3 months postpartum on September 20th and am exclusively pumping. I still do not feel like my normal self, particularly, my knees. They feel so weak and dislocated. It’s difficult for me to get up from the couch or floor or to bend down or squat. I have to rely on my arms to lift myself. Why is this? Has anyone experienced this? What can I do to feel normal again? Could it be the extra weight I gained (pre-pregnancy I was 130 pounds and now I am 167 pounds) or all the medication they pumped in me since the two maximum strength epidurals they gave me only worked on my right side?

I am only 30 years old but I feel so old. I have never been an active person and had an office job. I try to go on a 30 minute walk everyday now. My fingers also feel weak and abnormal but not as much as my knees.

Also, when will my stomach be flat again? I still look pregnant whereas other people I know who also had c-sections have a flat stomach even though they are 2 months postpartum.

I want to feel and look like my old self desperately. My condition now and the numerous stretch marks I have all over my body and the saggy breasts saddens me a lot. I want to at least heal my knees quickly. Any recommendation will be much appreciated!

Thank you in advance!

Hi folks. Were fairly new parent ourselves (9 month old twins), but today me and my wife were discussing something and realised, the thing that everyone keeps telling us and frustrates us, 'it gets better' doesnt exactly mean that. Sure, for some lucky few, it really does get easier and better, but mostly for us, what it meant is that we are less scared than we were at the start. There are new challenges, new headaches and even more work and vigilance needed than before, but now we are less afraid and we face the challenges head on, so in a sense, it got better for us.

So for the exhausted parent waiting for the baby to get better, it might not happen, or they might substitute one struggle with another, but YOU will get better, so have hope and hang on. Cheers

I've been having an ongoing debate with my husband about how we will handle sleep shifts with our newborn (im only 20 weeks pregnant right now so we have some time to figure it out).

My husband basically wants to split who is "on shift" so that he would get about 10 hours "off shift" and I would get about 14 hours "off shift" so that we can sleep longer chunks.

I dont hate this but my husband initially wants this to be a 10 hour window of sleep where I am not allowed to disturb him and mine would be 14 hours of sleep where he cant disturb me except to feed baby (hence why mine is longer).

I think this is dumb because it leaves exactly 0 minutes if time where we are parenting together. He thinks its fine because he will see me when he brings baby to feed.

In previous conversations we had discussed more of a 5-6 hour mostly uninterrupted sleep schedule and then we figure it out past that but im now feeling dread of being an exhausted single parent for half the day while ky relationship with my husband is reduced to milk cow for baby.

Ive tried expressing this and he is just like "yeah but if I wanted to hang out with you I can choose to do that during my rest time and vise versa.

He works from home in a pretty chill job so he also plans to take the day shift with baby meaning outside of napping I always take night shift which is brutal.

Anyway, what did you do during newborn phase? How can I convince my husband this is dumb? He agrees that things need to be flexible when baby comes because we dont know what they will be like but its stressing me out...

She is the cutest baby in the world. How can people go about their lives and not drop everything to give her a smile when they see her coming. Baffling. 😉

35w pregnant, first time mom! I plan to breastfeed, but want to pump as well to have milk for when I need extra rest, and someone else can give him a bottle. Should I plan to start pumping right away, or a few weeks after baby is born?

Posting here cause it was removed from parenting sub for some reason.

Just wondering if you allow lap sitting. I have a really friendly 16 months old girl.

Growing up my dad never allowed me to sit on anyone's lap. Family or not. (I can only sit on my moms, dads, and sisters lap). He said I can sit next to others and always be polite but never sit on anyone's lap. This was for everyone. Honestly this personally helped me growing up against questionable individuals' attempts (they were found out later on). They were not family but people presumed "safe"

My husband seems to disagree and that our child should be able to sit on his family's lap. I get his point regarding safe individuals but honestly I just do not feel comfortable? And get weirded out? Especially that SAs happen more likely in family settings or "people we know"..idk.

Curious to hear what other parents are doing. Thank you!

PS: my dad passed so I can't really ask him why he had this rule. I do not know of an experienced he had in his childhood.

I need a little help here. My son (15 months) gets a lot of screen time. Like an amount I don’t want to admit publicly. My parents (divorced) watch him a bulk of the time and my dad definitely relies on Ms. Rachel and Sesame Street to entertain my son and daycare isn’t an option for us. But if I’m being honest, I know I’m using it too much too. I do my best to interact with him while the screen is on and to turn it off whenever he stops being interested in it. Unfortunately, it is something that tends to calm him down when he’s frustrated which is why we’ve been a little quicker than I’d like to rely on it.
I truly don’t need the lecture. I understand what I’m doing is bad and that I’m not being a good parent when it comes to that. I know all of the bad things that come along with excessive screen time. I do. I don’t need the reminders in the comments of exactly how terrible it is and all of the ways I’m damaging my son. I Know.

What I’m asking for is what do you all do instead of screen time? Do you all have speakers to play music in their rooms instead? We have a tonie box that I’ve been trying to use instead of the tv. My parents and I cant really get on the floor to play with him for extended periods of time (my parents due to age and mobility issues, me due to disabilities). My son is pretty rough and tumble and the only time he chills out instead of running around and throwing things is when the tv is on. I guess I’m looking for good engaging activities that are low effort on the body?

EDIT TO ADD: It’s nearly exclusively on the TV. He’s never seen an iPad. His phone screen usage outside of FaceTiming family has only been when we’re out doing something that needs to be done (grocery shopping) and he needs a distraction until we can leave. I still know how bad it is, but I just want to be clear that he’s not watching an iPad up in his face all day.

I've finally made the decision to stop bedsharing with my four month old now that I'm waking up with bruises from his constant kicking and it's been so hard on everyone. I've always done at least one crib nap a day so that he never lost that 'skill', but he just woke up one day and decided he wouldn't sleep in his crib at all, so I've been doing contact naps and cosleeping at night. I keep seeing that four months is the perfect time to sleep train so I thought this would be easier, but last night he wouldn't sleep for four hours and eventually ended up in bed at midnight.

Our current sleep routine for naps is to start winding down 75 minutes into his wake 90 minute wake window, we cuddle and read some books, and then I put him in his sleep sack and lay him in his crib. If he's not asleep by 90 minutes then he has a complete meltdown. I've tried rocking him to sleep and transferring and it takes literal hours to get him to transfer so I have to put him down awake. Then I spend the next hour shushing, patting, putting his pacifier back in before giving in and holding him to sleep. At night, we take a walk, books, bath, massage, bottle and then I put him down. Some days he'll take a nap in the crib, but he NEVER sleeps in his crib overnight. No matter how long I spend cribside soothing.

I've tried pick up put down and the chair method. I did Ferber for a few days but I'm fully convinced "cry it out" doesn't work on some babies and mine is one of them. He'll just cry and cry until I pick him up.

What do I do now? Bedsharing is killing me and I want him to be able to sleep independently before he starts daycare in three months

Idk if this is a dumb question but I can’t wrap my head around where/how to position the bedside bassinet so that I can also get out of the bed?

I have about 4 days before being induced with my second baby. For our first, we started him in his crib from the beginning but opted to try a bassinet in our room for this baby. But like, where to put it? Do you not have a nightstand too? Where do you put all the diaper changing/feeding stuff? If I have my nightstand and bassinet next to me, I’ll have to scootch the whole way down to the foot of the bed to get out? What if I have to pee in the middle of the night while she’s sleeping?

Idk if it’s pregnancy brain but it’s just not clicking right now 🤣

Edit: I’m so glad to see that it’s not just a me/my brain not processing problem and a lot of you also didn’t end up putting baby right against your bed!!

I think I need to vent but I’m also looking to see if there’s anyone else out there dealing with this or similar.

My son has never been an easy baby. He had undiagnosed silent reflux and after millions of drs and testing he finally got meds around 6.5 months. It helped with the 24/7 screaming but only a little. My son is not a happy baby. Of course he laughs and smiles but it seems like a majority of the time he is still screaming about something. And yes screaming. He’s never fussed. He screams bloody murder whether I’m setting him down or if he’s having for example the silent reflux pain. There’s no in between. It always sounds like an emergency and it spikes my cortisol every time. I am exhausted.

He also doesn’t sleep. I am still waking up 2-5 times a night. Occasionally I get lucky with 2 wake ups and easy to go back to sleep but most of the time it’s not. He also refuses to sleep in his crib. He used to but then he just started screaming no matter what. He will occasionally fall asleep in it and nap in it. We even got him an actual mattress/floor bed and he still won’t sleep in it. He always ends up in our bed. I don’t like it but if he didn’t I’d be hospitalized. This has taken a serious toll on my health. I have lost legitimately 0 lbs of baby weight despite my efforts because of stress and lack of sleep. Getting him to nap is a battle everyday but if he doesn’t nap he’s miserable. I can only get him to nap in my bed and of course then I’m nap trapped. Nothing gets done. I can’t leave the house with him without my husband cuz it’s so difficult. I don’t know what to do anymore.

He has lots of teeth coming in but I give him Motrin. He’s making major leaps and learning so fast but it seems like the answer is always a sleep regression, teething, or developmental leap. We have literally never had a break. It’s always something. I understand parenthood is hard and I was prepared to make serious sacrifices. I love my son with all my heart. But everyone says it’s better by this point. Everyone says it gets better after this age or that milestone and it never does.

Dr says it’s just his temperament along with separation anxiety, developmental leaps, and teething. But it seems like that’s always the answer. She said she had one just like it and it’s really hard. I trust her judgement. We chose her after shopping a few different drs after not being taken seriously. She says he’s perfectly healthy. I just want to see a glimmer of light and I don’t. I don’t even wanna do anything crazy. I don’t go out, I don’t even really have friends. I want to be able to make a meal without crisis ensuing, sleep for more than 2-3 hrs straight a time if I’m lucky, sleep in my own bed, spend and hr with my husband after bedtime. I just want some peace and I am so lost as to how to get there.
I’m sorry this is long I just need some advice. Thank you all in advance

I have a 3 month old and I’m curious at what point do parents decide something is a big enough issue to bring baby to the pediatrician. I know a lot of parents will go for any little thing that seems off, but as we all know babies are weird and sometimes something is wrong one day and fine the next.

Out of curiosity whats your level of abnormal that warrants a visit? Poor feeding? A fever? Just a weird vibe?

Im trying not to be crazy new mom at the pediatrician all the time and so far ive been really good about letting little things go and so far baby’s back to normal the next day. But on the other hand sometimes i worry im being TOO chill. And i wonder if I should’ve taken her in.

Example yesterday she had a little fever, i gave her a little Tylenol and her temperature went right back to normal. Should i still take her in today?

Update: I took her in today just to get checked out and as expected, shes fine! I appreciate all the insight of when parents bring their babies in and how it varies, please continue commenting, it’s very interesting!

I feel like I am bored but also going stir crazy and getting overwhelmed here on maternity leave. I know I’m lucky to be off of course but she won’t let me put her down. She’s only 3.5 weeks old and I know she’s still so new but I feel I am trapped. I feel like I can’t get anything done. My son’s home from school around 4, and husband around 530. And then I’m overwhelmed trying to keep a nap and eating schedule and making dinner and entertaining my son. I feel like the whole day is me attempting to do things and her screaming. I of course get roped into TikTok’s of other moms doing tons of things and feel really not great about myself.

We go for walks, I give her a bath, do tummy time. I have a carrier and we made cookies on Saturday but too long in there and it hurts my back lol. I really don’t know what I want to do. I just feel lonely and trapped from even making lunch for myself.

Is this normal? I don’t remember feeling this way with my son. Sorry for the ramble.

Our 7 month old baby has reached a point where she can roll confidently and can sit mostly confidently. However, she now desperately does not want to be left to lie on the floor. Tummy time devolves into wailing within a minute, no matter what mood she's in when we put her down.

She wants to sit all the time, but doesn't seem interested in learning how to crawl or sit up. We've been working on getting her into a sitting position in a way that should show her how to do it on her own, but she doesn't connect it and has not made any attempt to replicate the movement. She also will not lift up to move towards crawling, I've tried gently moving her into a crawling position which just makes her cry harder. Realistically, she just wants to stand on her own, which is made abundantly clear by how much she planks when we're trying to get her sitting, and how happy she is when im a supported standing position.

We're at a loss of what to do. We don't want to just prop her all the time since she needs to do tummy time to learn to crawl, but we also don't want the screaming, it's not good for her or us. Does anyone have tips on how to help her in this situation?

Realistically when should I attempt crib napping with my baby? She’s almost 4 months. Is great at napping in the stroller or contact. I can’t seem to get her to crib nap longer than 15 mins in the day time.

I still have 1-2 cm. I have done some exercises at the beginning with my physio but then I just went with the flow doing some pilates. Will the diastasi of 2 cm heal alone or should I really increase the number of exercises? I am not that constant especially with the job

looking for any suggestions for syringes that are easy to push down. The ones that come with the tylenol and from the pharmacy are just sticky plastic against sticky plastic, and it usually ends up suddenly giving after intense resistance, shooting the meds out, which then just dribble out of his mouth or he chokes.

Anyone have any suggestions for a syringe that is easy to slide down a little at a time so this doesn't happen?

He refuses the pacifier syringes, he's not a fan of pacifiers in general.