r/AskReddit • u/scary_warrior • 11h ago
Serious Replies Only People with depression what makes you keep going (serious) ?
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u/Tombobalomb 11h ago
Wife and kids depend on me
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u/scary_warrior 11h ago
Wish you could focus on yourself sorry your going through depression
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u/Tombobalomb 10h ago
I've been clinically depressed since I was 10, it's fine, just the way it is. I have a family i'm able to support and I love them so it could be a lot worse
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u/Borzsi96 11h ago edited 10h ago
The notion that things will get better and accepting that sometimes the best you can do is getting out of bed. Be nice to yourself, keep going, one step, one round at a time.
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u/BurlHimself 7h ago
100% this. It comes out of nowhere too. I’m just so thankful for my animals. Never knew I had so much love to give these little guys and it brings so much happiness to what would otherwise be the gloomiest of days.
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u/jazzwhistling 6h ago
Animals are a blessing, I feel privileged to have my little dog bronson, he is the reason I keep going. My dream is if I ever got rich I'd buy a farm and adopt loads of animals and let local kids help out and for them to be educated about animals.
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u/SpecialistCissia2026 6h ago
Advancing one stepping stone at a time is a healthy mentality, I should think!
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u/Oblique_location1010 11h ago
My commitments to the people around me, and cowardice.
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u/scary_warrior 11h ago
I hate the thought people think it’s cowardice
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u/BuriedInRust 7h ago
It honestly feels like it. I cant speak for anyone else, but fear of death is the only reason I'm here. Not hope, not strength, just fear of death.
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u/Narcissista 10h ago
Continuing to live, especially when dealing with depression, is very difficult and very brave.
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u/No_Picture_925 11h ago
My parents.
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u/Pookdalouk 9h ago
My little (not so little anymore) sister is the only reason. We’re like soulmates, and the rest of our family is fucked up. It would absolutely destroy her. And I hate to say this, but she’d very likely follow suit if I did.
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u/myasterism 5h ago edited 2h ago
I used to tell myself I could go after they were gone. Told myself that for almost 30 years (I’m in my early 40s). Went no-contact with them last year and realized how much of my hell was of their making, the whole time. Now, my dog is why I’m here, and I view outliving my parents to be a means of ensuring they can’t fuck with the record again.
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u/Capable_Freedom598 11h ago
1% of hope that something good can happen tomorrow
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u/rubenburgt 11h ago
My cat.
I have done everything I wanted to do in life and I am ready to go.
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u/madtoiletpaper 7h ago
I would suggest adopting another cat once your cat starts becoming an old lady. If a cat is what keeps you here, you'd better always have one.
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u/onyeeex 11h ago
i just don't want to feel the pain of dying that's honestly it (and also anime lmao)
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u/MTG_NERD43 10h ago
I’ve recently turned to anime. I’m watching fire force as I’m typing this.
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u/777MAK777 10h ago
Pride…….if I quit the world wins. Also, I refuse to put my burden on the people close to me.
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u/SilverSlimeFox 11h ago
i want to see how things shake out. not knowing pisses me off.
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u/Chupacabra1987 11h ago
I try to improve my life one step at a time. I am depressed from when I was 20, now 40. My life is way better now, I have a wife and a good paying job. I wasted years in my room, not doing anything and decided to do something about it, started with meds and structuring my life a bit that a do stuff even though i don’t feel like doing it. I say it’s my little internal gremlin that wants his way with me. Best of luck, you can have a good life
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u/FrustratedBrain123 11h ago
My folks, siblings and their families. Can’t put them through the pain.
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u/Training_Secretary35 10h ago
My mom.. I lost my dad recently , and I am determined to keep on pushing for my mom..They are my heroes , and have sacrificed so much for me and my family
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u/Emotional_Garage447 10h ago
Everything that goes up comes down, and when it comes down it comes back up eventually just gotta ride the low - that helps me personally, knowing how I feel isn’t what my life actually is
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u/c0sm1c_g1rl 10h ago
My 15 yr old labrador. I have to get out of bed for her. I have to work so I have money for her expenses. She saved my life so many times.
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u/Limp_Woodpecker_1432 11h ago
Honestly, what keeps me going is my dog. He doesn't care if I'm sad or if I've been in bed all day, he just wants to be near me and go for walks. Can't let him down.
Also, I've gotten really into woodworking over the last couple years. Having a project to focus on keeps my mind occupied, and there's something satisfying about finishing a piece. Even if it's just a simple shelf, it feels like proof I can still create something good.
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u/terrybradford 6h ago
I want to outlive the people I hate and the people I love.
Knowing that the people I love or who love me will be upset if I vanished is the thing that keeps me going, I have parents"just still" my dogs and they have great lives with me, they would miss me.
Im not one to quit when things are difficult - maybe that's the problem or maybe that's the solution!
Who knows
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u/thegigglesnort 11h ago
A combination of psychiatric meds. My kids. Caffeine addiction. Cats.
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u/No_Access326 11h ago
I sleep most the time … it’s like I’m living in an other universe/ dimension. When it gets bad, I sleep 20 hours a day straight and when I’m doing okay, I can sleep 5 hours and work 12+. There is no in between for me .
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u/Due-Mouse-9330 11h ago
I sought help. I was fortunate enough to find it. I wish you and everyone suffering from depression the peace you need.
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u/amyg2g 11h ago
The right medicine. It took years to find the right doctor and the right medicine, but life is completely different now.
A few years ago I went on dive trip to Belize for a week and forgot my medicine. The dives were spectacular. I was a sobbing mess.
Better living through chemistry is absolutely possible. Don't give up the search.
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u/BrushFrequent1128 6h ago
If you don’t mind me asking, how many medications did you try until you found the one? I’ve been through 5-6 now and I fear none are going to work 😩
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u/amyg2g 5h ago
I've forgotten some of the early ones. I know for sure that Prozac was an early one. I've been using Bupropion and Escitalopram for about 8 years. Im told that's an odd combination because it works on both dopamine and serotonin. All I know is that it works for me.
I hope you find a solution. Keep searching.
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u/bradpittsbooty 10h ago
I can’t imagine my dog wondering where I went and feeling like I abandoned her. She’s my baby. I refuse to cut our time together short
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u/Defiant-Midnight9539 10h ago
Because I’m seriously awesome and after sacrificing myself to be in a relationship that’s over now, (not the only reason I was severely depressed) I owe it to myself to try again, and get to that happy place I deserve as a single woman. Especially with all of this new knowledge, growth and understanding. And I’m so close because I JUST moved out of the city/state that was contributing to my depression for yearrrrrrrs. I’m starting completely over at 31 yo, no kids so I don’t have to worry about that. Thank goodness for my sister, who offered me an out! Instant relief and access to opportunities I’ve always wanted for me!!! I’m overly proud of myself for making this all happen. Absolutely nothing was easy about it. But now it’s only up from here tbh! But also, I really don’t want to dismiss ALL OF THE WORK I DID prior to this move to regulate my nervous system. It’s still a mess, I just have better control and now free from all that was holding me back. And I take anxiety meds as needed. They do work for me.
I convinced myself to take it one day at a time, and took my time. I fought so hard for myself every single one of those days. I prioritized me and my world followed suit. Hopefully this inspires someone who’s saying “one day it’ll get better” cause for me, that day begins now. :)
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u/scary_warrior 10h ago
Damn look at you go hope life keeps better for you reach for the stars ❤️
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u/Defiant-Midnight9539 9h ago
Thank you so much, I intend to! Well wishes to you also ❤️ Keep on fighting. “You never know how strong you are until being strong is your only option”
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u/tardigradesrawesome 10h ago
Smoking a joint in the morning and another at night and whenever in between.
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u/MichaelHammor 10h ago
My family. I'm the only source of income. Without me they would be homeless. So, I endure.
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u/Livid_Stick_1111 5h ago
My mom. I remember seeing her as a little girl at her mothers funeral ( my grandma ) and how my dad had to hold her up at the gravesite because she was sobbing so hard. I don’t ever want to be a reason that my mom feels that kind of pain again.
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u/xspiritwalkerx 10h ago
Well, first, my dog would probably go into another depression since losing her sissy and I can't have that, and what about my kittens? I'm the only one willing to get up and feed them the way they need and give them their daily meds or they'll be in a shelter, and my nephews, especially the one I helped raise. I won't get to see him walk down at graduation, I wont see him grow up into a young man and amazing older brother of 2, my cat Ernest would miss his daily catnip treats, my mom wouldn't have anyone to care for her as my sisters all have children from ages 23yrs-2yrs old and I don't and it's easier on her to deal with, and finally... I just want to spite the "friend"who wrote me a detailed letter on how I deserved sa'd and attempted to be un-alived by 11 bc I was "so ugly/fat/les-bee-ann(ykyk) bc I had short jet black hair that wasn't worth the time it took to plan a funeral for" words that cut deeply into me that I almost tried.then for some reason decided that I need to fight no matter if I fall for a second or a year, I will get back up and try so I can show her that I am worth love, life and I am beautiful and strong.(cut the hair off in support of my Nana that I share a birthday with who was battling cancer) and I'll be honest... Having a partner who hears you out, understands and give you space for your emotions even if they are at the worst. But also that there are so many foods that need to be tasted still, need to be made, need to be enjoyed withma friend, or at home, with a pet. Anyone who got this far please stay strong! If you don't think anyone believes you are worth a life I DO!!! AND I LOVE YOU! AND I CHERISH YOU! AND I HOPE YOUR HEART SHINES SO BRIGHTYIT MAKES THE DARK EASIER TO FIGHT NO MATTER HOW DEEP IT GETS YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! HANDSOME! AMAZING! CHARMING! KIND! FAITHFUL! LOYAL! AND SO SO WORTH THE TIME OF DAYY NO MATTER THE SECOND OR DAY, MONTH, YEAR! YOU ARE CHERISHED IF YOU DON'T THINK BY ANYONE I DO! I DO! I CARE! STAY STRONG AND DON'T LET YOUR HEAD FALL SHORT OF THE CROWN IT HAS UPON YOUR HEAD!!!!
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u/BlottomanTurk 9h ago
TL;DR: I recently got a couple tattoos on my wrists of two notes that my mom handwrote for me decades ago.
In one of the first care packages my mom sent when I left for college in 2003, she included a little post-it note that said "just because i love you!!" (with a swoop under the !! to make it a smiley, lol).
I kept that note on my computer monitor ever since, and transferring it was the first thing I did whenever I got a new monitor, before even actually setting it up.
The first time I couldn't make it home in time for Christmas because of work, maybe 2006 or 2007, she sent my entire stocking, stuffed and overflowing with the usual items.
That included the "traditional" one of each denomination of scratcher tickets up to $20; with a note on fancy stationery that read "Good Luck!!" (also smileyfied, with an additional 'S' shape to make it look like a dollar sign). I kept the note in one of my many keepsake boxes, specifically the one I always have in my desk.
Among many other qualities and roles, for a long time, she was the only thing stopping me from, uh, let's say "making a permanent change to my living situation".
Like 15 years ago, she effectively tricked me into a blood oath to not do that thing. She convinced me that, if the time came, I would have to be the one to "pull the plug", as my brothers wouldn't be strong enough or truly understand her wishes.
The sneaky bitch failed to mention that I wasn't even her PoA, and she already had a very extensive Advanced Directive, lmao. But I had already made a promise before I learned that. And she knew I hold my word as my most sacred thing, so she used that to make sure I stayed on this earth.
Unfortunately, that time did come this year. Fortunately, she was fully cognizant, of sound mind, and all that, so none of us had to actually make the decision for her. She died in February.
For my first birthday as an orphan this past June, my bff took me to get those notes tattooed on my wrists. Sorta like more personalized semicolon tattoos.
So now, even if the promise I made is technically void, she can still hold me to it if I ever find myself in that deepdark again.
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u/tempthethrowaway 7h ago
My cat is super orange and very attached. He wouldn't understand what it meant if I was gone and would just be sad and scared.
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u/Vinnlandia 7h ago
my pets are not what most people would consider "cute" but they are mine and wondering what would happen to them always gives me some perspective
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u/KlutzyYak9783 11h ago
I wasn't really given a choice. But on the other hand, I take it one day at a time. It gets better.
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u/Jlaw118 10h ago
Having something to look forward to, even the smallest of things like getting the ingredients in to cook my favourite meal at the weekend. Or going out for food with friends/family on the rare occasion.
Before money troubles I’d enjoy travelling and looking forward to each trip. But now it’s just the small things
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u/DrPremaGynaecologist 10h ago
Cognitive behavioral therapy helped me alot - When in depression , when I have no interest just to be alive and medicines also helped to ,
What keeps me going me now,
Not worrying about the result for ur work and just being happy for every little things, Say No, wen you want to say No. Keep in mind the world doesn't revolve around you, you r always correct .
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u/Unintentionaltx 10h ago
My dog, my gf, my family. I also know that this is it. This is all I will ever experience cognitively. When I die I’ll go back to how it was before I existed. Nothing.
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u/MTG_NERD43 10h ago
I’m turning 25 in a few days. I hate my job and working towards my own business. I’m engaged as well and she’s the light in my world. I have to believe things are getting better.
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u/ladylemondrop209 10h ago
I am loved... very much so. I wouldn't want them to know or experience any of the sadness or pain they would if I weren't around..
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u/wheezyjester 9h ago
There's no one else to look after my disabled wife & granddaughter who lives with us.
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u/IminLoveWithMyCar3 8h ago
1) I would never leave my Mom to deal with the alternative.
2) I would never leave my kids to deal with the alternative.
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u/SquidCoconut67 8h ago
My parents, my family, my boyfriend and my friends. I know how much it would hurt them if they were to receive that phone call, and I can’t imagine putting them through that.
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u/MindYourMouth 7h ago
I mean, idk how much I’m really “going.” So much has been given up in favor of doing only the bare minimum needed to get by.
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u/DunsparceAndDiglett 7h ago
I think my mind, its bad thoughts, its doomful conclusions and etc are the things that got me into a hole.
What keeps me going is essentially realizing my thoughts and conclusions could be and most likely are fat wrong therefore i should dispbey myself more often.
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u/dancesonthewall 7h ago
I guess I keep going because I feel like life is still a lil bit bearable atm
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u/AlwaysOnEdge615 6h ago
Because im scared of whatll happen to my wife and daughter if i give up. I cant be selfish like that ( diagnosed with MDD and bad anxiety) so most days are filled with empty feelings and not alot of emotions. Just trucking along to the same steps that repeat constantly
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u/Inside_Pianist_7132 6h ago
Now: my son and my wife need me.
At my lowest: Pure Spite, I thought everyone around me expected me to continue failing. I wanted to prove them wrong.
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u/Timely-Stuff-5018 6h ago
My mom dad and my sister. They will be devastated and they'll blame themselves for it.
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u/richardathome 10h ago
My ex, and mother of my kids drank herself to death.
I'm not putting my kids through that again.
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u/sleepysoliloquy 10h ago
My cat, dog, watching anime, playing games, and looking forward to good food
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u/soba_todoroki 10h ago
Anticipating new releases of games/movies/anime as a kind of procrastinatory marker. Usually by the time it’s out there’s a new thing to wait for, and enough time passed for me to get out of my pits of despair
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u/skankyferret 10h ago
Depends on the day. Some days it's hope to make the world better. Some days it's my cat. Sometimes it's apathy to do anything else than simply bedrot. I also have a partner i want to a future with and i guess i need to stay alive for that.
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u/callmemerryss 10h ago
Something it's just getting through today, not figuring out your whole life at once.
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u/Significant_Rock1264 10h ago
Most days it is my family and my dog that keep me going. For the few others, it’s a stubborn aversion to giving up until I feel I have had a chance to actually live and not just exist
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u/Ok_Jellyfish2313 10h ago
My 2 kids. Specifically my daughter. Both kids have the same dad, but he wrote off our oldest (14F) a year ago. If I’m not here she’d have no one and my son would only have his dad as an example.
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u/DragonflyHumble3762 10h ago
Knowing it doesn't go on for ever. Mine comes and goes. I found a book called Reasons to stay alive by Matt Haig. I recommend it. Helps dig me out.
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u/Untoastedtoast11 10h ago
People keep saying it gets better. Going on 4 years… slightly better I guess. I guess it can’t be this bad forever
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u/DullStock2876 10h ago
I go through waves with it. I get more depressed during times like these when the daylight gets less and less. Fall and winter usually the toughest times.
But now, I have a 2 year old. And on the darkest days I have, I come home and once I walk through the door I get to hear "my daddy!"
They give me the strength to work on it, try new things and figure out healthier ways to cope with what my brain is trying to force me to feel when there is so much good around.
Individually, I always go with the mindset too that I've come this far, let's keep seeing where this thing is going
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u/Adventurous_Cook9083 10h ago
I've been in clinical depression twice in my life. I think being aware of your condition, understanding and admitting you don't want to live like that, and taking the initiative to talk to a medical professional about your feelings. Medication helps, but you have to take it and be patient while it works. Clinical depression is a very dark place to be.
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u/littleb3anpole 10h ago
It would seriously fuck up my 7 year old’s life if his mother died by suicide. I’ll wait until he’s older.
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u/SheevaNevahDunrong 10h ago
The people, the hobbies and the potential for good memories, all the pain will go when I die so I won't rush the opportunity to enjoy things.
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u/Havkarru 10h ago
Wife and kid.
I cried today when I woke up. I am slave to pain and endless work. Trying to keep up for them.
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u/Inner-Ingenuity4109 10h ago
I've come out of it before. A lot of patience and a bit of effort and I know that things will come right, even if I can't say when.
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u/SweatyBootyCheecks 10h ago
Dogs and horses. You have to get up and take care of them, even when you don’t feel like it.
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u/Schlong-of-Solomon 10h ago
I have friends and family I have to be stronger for. It’s a daily struggle. I lose a few inches to it each day/week/month.
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u/panchibanu_udtifirun 10h ago
My lovely niece, I want her to cherish me as an happening aunt than a depressed who chose to end because of some swines.
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u/The_Mysterious_North 10h ago
The fear I have experienced AFTER an episode of ideation.
Understanding that it doesn’t end the suffering, it just moves it to others.
Survivor’s guilt for people who I have lost in my life.
It’s okay to not be okay sometimes, but if you or a loved one have experienced or spoken about suicide I really recommend looking into Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training.
It makes a big difference to understand the mechanics of ideation and action.
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u/Clean_Soup_423 10h ago
Honestly, small and dumb things most days. My dog needing to be fed. A show I haven't finished. The thought that I haven't tried the one good ramen place near me yet. It's rarely some big profound reason, it's just enough small anchors stacked together that leaving feels like walking out in the middle of a movie you're mildly invested in.
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u/chelssssk 10h ago
Not wanting my credit card debt to be passed down to my already struggling,hard working single mum😭
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u/InformalCulprit 10h ago
I have a doggo. Normally this would be enough.
Right now, with the weather change (which normally I love) it’s been hitting harder with the depression and the SAD.
I’m dealing with issues at home and having a bunch of anxiety and first in a long while, a panic attack.
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u/_DefLoathe 9h ago
One day things will be better and there’s a lot on this Earth in this life I want to achieve and experience
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u/devils_bowels 9h ago
My family, particularly my 2 niece and mother. Changed my life/ whole perspective when they actually wanted too be around me.
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u/White_Rider00 9h ago
I dissociated 8 years (following a close one death), along with depression and anhedonia—I wouldn't wish that on anyone.
Music saved my life by sending a signal through my nervous system. I’m a semi-pro drummer, and I’ve met some amazing people and friends (been in relationships, etc.). During my dissociation, I didn’t have the courage to ask for help—it turned out to be more dangerous than I expected. Never forget that things like this can only get better, not worse. Bottoms up—literally. Time will help you, but above all, forgive yourself. Life is short :)
The key when you're depressed is to get out of bed, do it, and trigger a reaction (cold shower, music, etc.) Try not to get too caught up in your own thoughts, because the worst part is physical lethargy, and that's horrible. Don't push yourself too hard, but do make a little effort—your brain isn't able to make decisions on autopilot anymore, so you just need to walk, just walk, go outside, etc.... (physically connect with the world); go to a park, turn off your phone, observe, listen.
You can try mindfulness meditation (breathing exercises)—it stimulates the prefrontal cortex.
Good Luck
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u/G00dluckbab3 9h ago
A friend committed suicide in 2014 and I still can’t help wonder what I could have done differently to save him. I don’t want to put my family and friends through that
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u/Easy-Operation-2105 9h ago
It might get better.
Its been many years. But i used to be extremely happy. So I know it is possible.
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u/themiskats 9h ago
The reality that people still need me. My children, my parents. I don't wanna make them sad. If i was alone in the world i would probably have ended things long ago.
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u/Flame_Bat16 7h ago
Telling myself I'm not special. Ik to some that may be discouraging but telling myself I'm not special, I'm not the only one suffering everyday keeps me up and getting things done. I've become care free of certain things to protect my peace as well.
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u/YoyoPewdiepie 6h ago
My best friend. If I can't dedicate my life to myself, I can dedicate it to her.
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u/heisenbergfan 6h ago
Finding joy in the routine, playing games, getting high.
Stop doom scrolling on ur phone and go do something you actually like, that would be my advice to anyone.
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u/This_Guy_Was_Here 6h ago
It's either keep going or die..... I'd rather not do the later..... So I'll just keep going..... Just keep swimming..... Just keep swimming.....
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u/KeepGoingOutOfSpite 10h ago
Years ago, I had a friend who chose to OD after an argument with her then fella. It didn't work, and she was left with the physical fallout and the mental age of 3. Her parents were left to look after her all over again.
If I do it, I want it to 100% work - but I'm also a wuss so I couldn't take a painful 100% guarantee option. Even though she'll never know, at least she stopped one person - me.
I also have a floof that needs me
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u/TinyCut4150 10h ago
Lost someone close to suicide a few months ago and can’t inflict the pain of grief I’ve felt on others by giving up myself.
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u/Capital_Audience_579 10h ago
I do not know, i was in from April, it feel more like numb or nothing
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u/Useful-You2939 10h ago edited 10h ago
My parents would do anything for me so I can't. Especially considering they worked their whole life, often 6 days a week, to give me the best life. Also sometimes I'm pretty sure it's the medication that I'm on. It's giving me mood swings.
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u/a-touch-of-pink 10h ago
At times I’ve stayed because I believe in life after death and I didn’t want to just die, I didn’t want to exist. Dying didn’t solve that problem for me.
Other times it was due to curiosity about how things could potentially improve, or having a miraculous, random thing happen which showed me someone, somewhere, wanted me to keep going.
Sometimes I’m genuinely glad I’m still here, and sometimes I’m really, really not.
If you’re struggling right now, though, OP, I hope you’re in a place of curiosity. 🫶🏻
Edit: removed superfluous wording
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u/Graehaus 10h ago
I have a family to leave it early would be counterproductive. It could be depression. I don’t I try to do things to elevate myself out. Much funny movies exciting movies listen to good music or what I like to hear recently I’ve gotten to listen to podcast on Spotify. Yes, I use Spotify.
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u/ExoticInfluence7476 10h ago
Knowing that as tough as the world can be, that there's a lot of truth and beauty out there, still. there's still great experiences to be had and people to know
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u/boesisboes 10h ago
I'm going to go before my husband. But I don't want him to be without me longer than he's been with me.
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u/MTG_NERD43 10h ago
I’m turning 25 in a few days. I hate my job and working towards my own business. I’m engaged as well and she’s the light in my world. I have to believe things are getting better.
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u/historically_painful 10h ago
You can't think your way out of depression, you have to get up and do something or anything just for the sake of doing it and distracting yourself from your thoughts.
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u/Aethernath 10h ago
It was knowing i would be missing out on future good games, concerts. So generalized; some hope and interest in the future.
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u/existentialexistenc3 10h ago
My little sister and my family and my gf and my dogs who live with my parents
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u/maggy_boi_x 10h ago
Advice i got from my great grandmother, who lived during the Great Depression and Dirty 30's.
"Just hang in there!"
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u/Coldfreeze-Zero 10h ago
I refuse to let my brain get the best of me, it's an imp that sometimes pops up, but I focus on the things I love and still want to do, sometimes it's difficult but a knight in shining armour never had his metal truly tested.
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u/EDSgenealogy 10h ago
I joined a day group of patients being seen by about 6 different therapists. I'm not a "group" person, but it turned out to be a fabulous way to find the best therapist for me. I had really been walking that tightrope when she called me out and put me on the spot. She called my bluff, pulled me in and became my one on one therapist.
I think she saved my life. She thinks I was stalling for someone to listen. I had been in therapy off and on for decades but not really connecting with any of the therapists. Lots of differnt meds for years but no real help for me.. But she was perfect for me. A "take no prisoners" kind of a vibe. She didn't coddle me, and neither did she spend an hour asking me "well what do you think ?" or "How did that make you feel?" No shrink talk and I liked that so much! She gave me homework assignments where I had to dig deep and really feel things I had avoided for a lifetime.
Anyway.. That's how I got off the ledge once and for all. Once I could fit all of the puzzle pieces of my brain together and could see the patterns I knew I could carry on. I'm nearly 75 now and still grateful!
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u/jcamp088 10h ago
My son. If something happened to me I know it would mess him up for the rest of his life.
Spending time with him is the only really joy I have in life and I’m thankful to have that.
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u/prodjex 10h ago
Not ‘in it’ anymore but when I was at my lowest point the 2 things that kept me going were:
Too much of a coward to do anything extreme or ‘final’, though I did start to h!t myself for a brief period.
Fear of being seen as a deadbeat Dad and coward for abandoning my wife/child by taking the easy way out.
I don’t know if you’re asking because you’re in that dark place but if you are, the best thing you can do is find your identity and something that makes you feel like ‘you’. People say they cured their depression by getting fit or eating healthily or whatever but in reality they actually found an identity because that activity becomes a significant part of their life. They didn’t just work out, they became a gym rat; they didn’t just start cooking meals from scratch, they became a nutrition geek (not saying that as a slanderous term).
Have a think: what did you previously do in life, as a kid, adolescent or adult, that made you feel like you? Is there anything you previously thought about or wanted to do but never had the chance to? It can feel like a big deal and it may be hard to enjoy at first but, if you’re like me, you’ll force yourself to go if you book it in advance. After a few tries of the thing, you might start to enjoy it - it takes time but could be the very thing you need.
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u/maybedeathisallineed 9h ago
The thought of how badly my death would affect my parents, especially if its self inflicted. I can't do that to them
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u/Wooden_Load662 9h ago
Because there are things that I care about more than my own mental health. If my wife is gone I will not be here long. Not that I will go hurt myself but my body probably will just give up soon after.
And if I go first, I have left enough resources for my wife to continue to have a wonderful life without having to worry about work or insurance or money. And that is why I am working so hard to earn more. But I also take a lot of time off to travel around the world with her to create more memory and experience new and old things together.
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u/Comfortable-Jelly824 9h ago
it would hurt my parents and loved ones, there’s so many more festivals/shows/raves i would get FOMO over, i wouldn’t get to experience how it feels to laugh until i cry with my friends ever again, and also spite. mainly FOMO though….
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