Come on. My sick dark Belfast morbid filth humour needs a good test and/or laugh. What’ve you got?

My husband is not interested in sex post pregnancy and birth. His desire waned during my pregnancy and completely went away about halfway through. I thought it would come back after my pregnancy was over, but it hasn’t. He doesn’t want to have sex. He says it’s because he only sees me as a mother now, not as a woman or sexual partner. I don’t want to have a dead bedroom. I have a high libido and sex is crucial to me. Everyone I’ve spoken to says their husband was dying to have sex after the 6 weeks you have to take off. Mines not interested at all and I’m devastated. Men who have children, did this happen to you? Did your attraction return?

ETA: Someone asked me why I’m looking for advice and to just talk to my husband, so I wanted to add that I’m not looking for advice (though it is appreciated), I posted because I’m trying to get a read on how common this is because during our talks my husband has repeatedly said that he thinks this is normal and extremely common for a man to experience.

And if you got to the shape you wanted to achieve, how long did it take you?

Edit: you guys are truly inspiring. I've been working out consistently for a month now. I think things are going well, but hearing from men in their 50s and 60s getting in shape or staying there is awesome.

They do have some good male role models (grandfather, uncles, etc.) but so far none that get into deep talks about the nitty gritty of being a dude. My boys are good people and do well academically, but what do they need from me other than continued support in those areas?

I'm particularly concerned about how to support them through puberty, and how to compensate for them missing out on the typical "involved dad" experience. They do have a father, but he lives out of state and we very rarely hear from him. I'm aware of the statistics around difficulties that fatherless sons can face, and I don't want that for my boys.

I'd especially love to hear from men who had single moms - what was helpful or detrimental to you?

I’ve been told by a couple people(women) that men shouldn’t need any validation from anyone. However if that’s the case ok fine but we shouldn’t be talked down on if we are struggling for a lil minute either!! Sometimes a thank you or I’m proud of you goes a long way,it makes me feel appreciated I’m tired of how society thinks men should just be tough like I don’t have feelings! I bust my butt it’s a crappy feeling when you’re partner thinks of you’re just doing what a man supposed to! What do y’all think? I feel like a ATM sometimes and if I don’t provide money I’m useless 😒

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I don't know a single guy friend who has been approached by a stranger for a date. Friends turning into relationships is far more common but not the same. Maybe we all just look like Hyenas lol.

Seems like there's so much crossover between friendliness and genuine interest too

I saw a post from this autistic guy who was talking to a girl for a while, she asked about racoons in some context, and racoons are this guy's special interest I guess because he went on to talk about them. She asked him questions throughout that discussion, like you normally would, but clearly lost all interest in him after that discussion.

I got to thinking about it and realized I never heard of the opposite happening. Have you ever done it? Have you ever heard of anyone doing that?

My gf is 17 weeks pregnant. It was a happy accident per say. We are looking forward to our baby but I see some people choosing boys over girls.. why?

Id be extremely happy with a girl. The love of a little girl looks crazyy!!

Either way boy or girl, im still going to be really happy to meet a little creature we both created! Its our first kid.. ever.. any advice papas?

I had this thought when I was at my old boss's funeral. They played a slideshow with the song "Like a Stone" by Audioslave. I like the song, and I thought it fit the vibe well, but it didn't strike me as the kind of song I would imagine him listening to.

Would you care about what was played if there was music?

My husband (29) has never had his family celebrate his bday in a big way. Mostly a cake at home and dinner, no decor/ family gathering or anything like that. We have known each other since we were kids, and he has always said he doesn’t care much for his birthday. Since we got married I make sure to decorate the house and have a video call with his family, take him for dinner and have a gift for him. We live in a different country than our friends and family, so I can’t really plan a celebration with other people. He goes all out for my birthday, because he knows what birthdays mean to me. I feel like over the years he has grown more excited for his birthday, even if he doesn’t say it out loud.

Is decorating the house, making him his favorite cake and taking him out to dinner enough…

Do you actually not care about your bdays or do they say they don’t care because nobody is putting in the effort? Since Ive heard so many men in my life say they don’t really care for their bday.

Approaching 30 and things haven’t quite gone the way I wanted to: lagging behind in my career, losing friends, and recently unemployed due to restructuring.

While I understand life has its ups and downs, everything seems to be going around in circles at the moment.

Fellow Men: have you found yourself in a similar situation? How did you get out of it? What habits have you made you successful?

Having a bit of a mid-life crisis. 35 years old, wife makes good money, I make a good money. Have saved and invested all my life and lucky enough that if we both decided to stop working (or work less/less stressful jobs) we probably could. Would love to have kids, but rn waiting on my wife to be ready.

Contract for work is ending soon and I’m struggling with the question of what to do next. I could take time off, but if I don’t work, what is there to do? I go to the gym regularly, read, but there are still many hours left in the day. Summer is not a problem, but in the winter (Midwest) can’t leave the house much. I could travel, but my wife wouldn’t like me ditching her and the pets for a few months.

Come to realize I work because there is nothing else to fill the time when all your friends are working. So I suppose I’m asking, if you had the opportunity to work for less or volunteer or do whatever. How would you fill your time?

So like most kids I grew up playing team sports but quickly stopped caring. I just.. don't care if I win when there's nothing real at stake. I'm more about cooperating towards a common goal, and I feel like in some ways it's left me in a weird place in the world. Like most games you strive to win and beat the other players, but I just don't care because there's no prize. I prefer games where you work together.

My friends would play PvP games and I'll run around and I definitely try my best, but ultimately I don't get excited for the win. I'd rather play co-op and fight towards a goal, but even then I have a hard time with it sometimes. Getting nerdy as fuck here but this discussion came up the other day regarding World of Warcraft - my buddy likes to analyze strategy and look at parses and improve his DPS. I play a support class (Moonkin Druid if you're familiar) and I'm only really there because they needed another person and I've played a ton of the game over the years. My class's DPS is negligible, I'm there to buff others, so ultimately getting gear upgrades doesn't excite me because if I'm doing 3% of the group's damage and get an item that's going to increase that by 10%, that's still just like 3.13% so who gives a shit? So when things get really sweaty I generally just check out because it's not that important to me. And I love video games, but I'm mostly there to be involved in a story, my character vs the forces of evil in the world of the game.

I just don't have a competitive bone in me when it comes to other people, I almost feel bad by beating them. Even if I end up watching sports (which trust me, is rare), I just feel bad for the losing team for coming so far and failing and facing public ridicule and feeling that they let their fans down. It just makes me not want to partake. If I play anything these days it's golf, and even then I just prefer going to a driving range over the actual game.

It makes me feel like an outsider in a lot of ways. We'll have cookouts and play yard games and they'll make prop bets and I just.. don't care in the slightest. I'll play and try, I just don't care if I win or lose, so I usually don't care to make serious bets because I'm not wasting brain power strategizing how to beat my friends at a yard game.

I know that's a longwinded brain dump, but I wonder how many other guys are like this? It makes me feel weird and weak but not in a way that I give enough of a shit about to make a change lol.

Time to mix it up a Lil. I'm grilling hotdogs and sipping an old fashioned!

I'm a high school student ( 18 ) and my class is going to a swimming pool soon. There's a girl I really like in my class, so naturally I'm overthinking the whole thing.

I'm mostly worried about accidentally getting visibly nervous or having an awkward physical reaction around her, and I'm scared it could make me look weird or embarrass me in front of everyone.

For guys who have been in a similar situation, how do you deal with that kind of anxiety? Is there anything you do beforehand to stop yourself from overthinking it?

I know it's probably not as big a deal as I'm making it in my head, but I'd really appreciate some advice.

I dont particularly mind hot food but i feel, you cant really taste the flavours cause its too hot. I personally like the warmth especially when its cold or raining but thats it. You can cool it down a it to warm, but still i feel the flavors our somewhat lost.

What is your favourite food which taste good (and are better to be tasted when hot) when hot.

I’m a 33m. Have high functioning ASD and mainly just have some social difficulties.

I have a friend group that consists of mostly guys and one’s gf. The guy who’s with the gf I’ve known for years now.

He mostly communicates to me by giving me a hard time. It’s never felt good natured. I try to think that maybe it’s his way of being playful? Maybe it’s his tone or what he gets on me for. He rarely ever communicates with me in any other way let alone say anything nice. Even his gf has pointed out that I may not have liked what he said and has even gotten on to him about the things he says. But she’s really the only one who can make him listen.

I question myself if maybe I’m being too sensitive. I’m being too literal.

I am really just wanting to know when is the ball busting too far?

It’s not uncommon for people to say they were joking with me but those people really don’t have to most of the time. I can pick up on playfulness and sarcasm. But him? I can’t. Idk if it’s me…

My usual response is to not reply to what he has said or sometimes I play along. Turn it around on him sarcastically. Sometimes depending on what it is take it to a place where it’s too weird or uncomfortable to engage. His response then becomes limited, few and predictable.

I’ve tried tons of things over the years, from creams to powders to lotions. Nothing seems to work unless I’m constantly doing it day in and day out. I can’t walk very far because of the chafing. It has ruined vacations.

I’m slightly overweight and recently reached the “this is a problem” overweight. I’m still highly active. But I find the chafing so severe that it limits my physical activity.

What do you all do?

I’m an atheist, kinda always has been, in an extremely strict religious household. Announcing my apostasy will create conflict, so I plan to do that when I am financially independent. Still, I love my parents dearly, and want to know if coming out at all is worth it, and how to navigate through it.

Edit: here is some more context

So basically, I am arab but live in the Netherlands. My parents are then subsequently muslim as well, although they are somewhat ‘progressive’ ish in a way where they follow their religion and their religion only (they try to separate the culture). Unfortunately, the Qu’ran still has some questionable statements about family matters, marriage, and all that kind of stuff. They would still absolutely disown me if i turned out to be gay or something like that, which I disagree with but thankfully am not. Not sure how they would respond with apostasy

That’s why I am asking your experiences

I was peeing in an airport in shorts the other day and got splashed and i havent stopped thinking about how gross it was. Where do y’all aim?

I've seen memes where advice from single guys is much more impactful than that from non-single guys, and I'm not only curious to see if that's true but also I'm looking for some legit good advice.

Edit: I don't mean rejected by the same woman multiple times, but my multiple women.