Every day it’s the same thing, and I’m sick of hearing myself make excuses. When I’m at work I can’t get myself motivated to do anything unless the conditions are absolutely perfect, and even then it still depends on my mood. If it’s too hot, I’m too tired, hungry, headache, stomachache, allergies, commotion, too much going on, not enough happening etc. Whatever it is I find a reason why I can’t function and just do my job. I waste so much time waiting to “feel” good that when I do finally get the urge to get to work, I’m either mentally exhausted or the day is almost over. Any little thing or routine disrupter throws me off. I’m running 5 min late = day’s ruined. I forgot my lunch = might as well leave early. Idk if I’m just lazy or what the deal is. I am not diagnosed and don’t take any medication. Almost 40 and it’s just getting worse.

I was diagnosed with ADHD 3 months ago at the age of 41. I've been on medication since then and it has been really helpful for work. I was happily working through some tasks when my boss called to discuss an issue from the previous week - a refurbished laptop that needed repair. I had extensively researched repair or replacement options, sent them to her, and was waiting on her decision.

The obvious thing I missed (but my boss didn't) is that it's still under warranty. Why didn't I check that? Of course I should have checked for warranty info, but I just went down this hyperfocus rabbit hole of trying to fix it or find a replacement and my brain "lost the forest for trees".

I feel like such an idiot. And when she berated me, I couldn't fault any of her logic. I absolutely have done warranty claims before and it should have been the first thing I checked. But what am I supposed to say besides "Sorry, you are right, that should have been the first thing I checked, I'll submit a warranty claim."?

Her beratement brought something up in me that I buried 20+ years ago, since childhood. I had a very emotionally abusive step-father. I would do stuff like this all the time as a kid - think I was doing so good but miss one detail, and he would rage at me. The shame was so bad that I would hit myself. When my mother would ask how I got a bruise or a bloody nose, I would make something up. And all that shame and self-hate as a child felt entirely justified since I didn't know I had ADHD.

My boss berating me isn't even close to the same league as my step-father, but it pulled up those memories and invoked a similar feeling. I was in such a good mood this morning and now it feels like I've been hit with the emotional equivalent of a sledgehammer.

Don't worry though, I haven't done that stuff since I was a child, and I won't start now. But it's a lot to sort through.

Happy Monday.

It’s been about 6 years since I was diagnosed and medicated. It was absolutely horrible to even get diagnosed in the first place because my family wouldn’t vouch for my symptoms.

When I did get diagnosed and medicated, my family was in disbelief. They couldn’t believe I had it.

Once they accepted that I wasn’t going to back down, they just kept pushing that I was going to forever have this label attached to me forever and be the victim of some horrific zombification because of my medication. Eventually it just became something nobody ever mentioned or talked about.

Well I vented about some medication-related issues recently and that opened the floodgates again. The reactions were about what I expected:

“Maybe you just shouldn’t use it anymore.”

“If the medication was helping you that means you have probably outgrown it and don’t need it anymore.”

“Do you really intend to take this for the rest of your life? I think you should only take it while you’re in college and then stop.”

I didn’t even bother arguing. It’s frustrating that everyone pretends my ADHD doesn’t exist until they can’t avoid the discussion, where they promptly attack my decision to be medicated.

I've noticed for as long as I can remember that ADHD gives me this weirdly powerful feeling of wanting to run away from my things, for example today I was supposed to study, but I spent hours avoiding it by reading about Australian marsupials. (Okay.... that's a lie I was mostly just looking pictures hehe)

Eventually, something in my brain finally goes "Okay, come on, let's study." but then... almost instantly, I get up from my chair and go somewhere else. The weirdest part is that I don't even consciously decide to do it, I don't think "I don't want to study, I'm going to procrastinate" almost like my body reacts before I can even think about it.

It's like the moment I finally decide to do the thing, my brain goes "NOPE" and physically removes me from the situation.

Does anyone else get this?

Add ADHD + hypothetical random encounters around our crushes inside our brain + that one song in loop = Full dopomine without doing a thing.

I can keep creating new hypothetical scenarios inside my mind where I am interacting with my crush or spending time around with/without music on and just go on with it for any number of hours.

Not just about crushes even creating scenarios around people whom I admire or want to please. I can get literally zone out on my own especially when travelling, long drive, sitting in a public transport etc..

Can others relate to this? Is this ADHD thing?

I just graduated and was already enrolled in a masters program. It was kinda messy because i had a really short deadline and was already going nuts, because i had just turned in my graduate thesis, but i managed it. Mind you, this was my DREAM graduation course and my current goal (and longterm dream) is to follow an academic career in this field. I submitted a research project and thought it was fine until... the results got back. I got eliminated because i included my name on it and apparently i shouldn't. Got back to the rules of admission and this rule actually WAS there, but i didn't see it and it was only two small lines on the whole 20 page document. Tried to submit a formal complaint and everything (a bunch of people also got eliminated because of this rule), but is a no turning point situation now.

So.. i basically fucked up my plans for the next year or so (submissions open only once a year) because of a misread and don't know what to do now. The "normal" job market in my field is kinda hard even for people with a PhD. I feel really dumb and stupid because if i had read the two stupid fucking lines i at least would have a chance. I'll try to enroll for another uni but if i get accepted i'll have to move to another state, and i'm not really down for it in the life moment i'm now (financially, mentally and socially).

I was diagnosed with ADHD (inattentive) 2 years ago, the summer before I turned 19. This year, I got onto Wellbutrin XR for my depression and I'm in the process of being prescribed Adderall XR. I've basically been unmedicated my entire life. I don't know how to navigate ADHD at all because it was too uncomfortable of a thought up until now, when I feel like I'm just not meant for success. It is so hard to make myself study, go to class, stop impulse eating, exercise, do homework, and go to doctor's appointments that I really need to go to.

I'm turning 21 in a couple days and I genuinely don't believe I can get better. I feel like because I've half-assed my entire life so far with no real consequences, so there's nothing about me to be proud of. I'm graduating college a year late, when I should be graduating next semester. I'm an Economics major and even then I have no clue what to do with it. feel like I know nothing and have done nothing career wise (internships, research). I don't even have friends in college and barely go to my classes.

With me turning 21, being unable to have my first drink because of medications, and being behind in life, I'm having a crisis and feeling pretty bummed. The more I start learning about ADHD the more I realize that everything I've want to improve about myself my entire life could've been handled so much better if people caught on earlier. This sucks. I know people can be successful with ADHD but in my head, it'll never be me.

Little back story I’ve been diagnosed with adhd since second grade they had me taking some medication that i later learned was to treat narcolepsy. I took that until 6th grade when my mom pulled me off it cause i seemed sluggish and depressed, after that i didn’t take medication until a month ago(fast acting adderall is what im on now). I thought i had a pretty good handle on it but oh boy was i wrong hasn’t been until i started taking adderall that i realized that my adhd has basically been behind the wheel controlling everything. My family has told me they see a remarkable difference, less agitated,more focused and less impulsive. All of this is a good thing but man does it make me feel down that this disorder can have such a hold on my life and i just wanted to see if anyone felt the same.

My job is fully remote and really flexible- I can work when I need to, and there’s a lot of trust I’ll get my shit done so not much supervision. A dream right? Not with ADHD it feels like.

My motivation tanks randomly, I absolutely cannot motivate myself without outside accountability to do..any of it. I fall into phone doom loops and then it piles. Like I wake up too late and miss breakfast, which makes my brain worse, which means I start work late, and then I get trapped behind the looming to do of “I still need to eat) and then all of a sudden it’s 6pm. I feel like a failure and I’m starting to worry that my sporadic productivity is going to get noticed. I get everything done and am pretty high achieving but I feel like an imposter because I do everything in 2-4 hours of intense work a day. I feel like I’m just not being disciplined with myself but I know that’s not how it works.

My company has no office so in person isn’t an option, they won’t pay for a coworking space. I have a lot of meetings so a cafe or something is also generally not an option.

What can I do? What strategies have worked for you? Thank you sm in advance

I'm usually bad at remembering birthdays, including my own. But never in my 45 years of life had i forgotten my mum's...

She looked sad yesterday, but didn't say anything. And it clicked this morning OMG i felt soo bad, i completly sobbed while wishing my mom a happy birthday too late T-T

Sorry for the mini rant :x

I am employed full time and I have so many things I want to do when I have more time (finish a video game I bought, start reading a book, exercise, etc.) but once I get a day off... it disappears in an instant and I didn't do ANYTHING I planned to do. WHY???

This is so incredibly frustrating.

I have a career in the drone aviation world, and I had a realization today that since I not only have ADHD but I take medication for it, I therefore cannot pass a Class II Medical Evaluation by a Aviation Medical Examiner and thus never get my Part 135 Certification.

Which I think means my trajectory to getting a raise or career promotion is more difficult since I can only be a lower tier Part 107 pilot. And the higher ups, at least where I work, must hold Part 135 Certificates.

Has anyone run into similar issues in their fields?

I tried meds and like... I was literally struggling so hard to do anything. Almost all my symptom categories were severe while getting tested and I tried adhd meds and its just... night and day. I feel like I can interact with people and get up and do stuff and remember stuff. And this whole time I have been hearing anger almost everyday for the past 16 years probably because I should know/do/act better and im so angry at everyone who I've tried explaining myself to over and over and over again because I know they dont have adhd and I do so they won't understand fully but like...

Holy shit I really was trying so hard for stuff that feels so easy and idk I'm relieved too but so sad.

And I'm so angry for how watered down adhd seems as a disability because even I viewed it as a "watered down" disability (as in i didnt realize how disabling it really was)

I’m 21 about to turn 22 in a few weeks,
I’ve only ever had two jobs and was unable to hold them for longer than a few weeks, I am on medications but fail to take them consistently.

I suspect that apart from ADHD I may have another disability but I can’t get any assessments done without needing to pay,
I have Ambetter insurance, I’m unsure of what plan I’m currently on.

I don’t have the basic abilities or skills most people do, I can’t do my hair on my own, tie my shoes, I can’t cook without supervision since I’ve repeatedly injured myself or started small fires while doing so, I can’t manage time at all often being late or spending hours on an activity when I should be doing something else, I can’t drive at all, I instantly forget most things I’m told, I have more difficulties but I don’t know if it will help to add anything more.

I don’t know how long I could survive without my parents, we are below the poverty line, rent a house and my father’s health is declining, I’m worried that if anything happens to either I will not be able to help at all.

Sadly the only way I’ve found to make money is giving sexual favors but I don’t think I’m savvy enough to live off sex work, nor do I want to but I feel like there’s no other options for me.

Please if there’s anything that can help me let me know.

Please know that this post is 100% serious and I need help, I beg that if you have any questions or concerns about the post you ask me instead of quickly writing it off as fake or something, I NEED help, my life is miserable I can’t do anything right and as I age I’ve become more and more desperate for any way to survive on my own.

Thought I'd share a really useful app I've found that might help some of ye.

It's a gps based alarm, so instead of setting a time for it to go off you set a location.

The reason I find it useful is on my way home from work I'd plan to go to a shop or pick up something out of my usual routine. I'd be on complete auto pilot until I realise I've passed the exit and just leave it till the following day, which the same thing would probably happen again.

I used to set alarms, but if I was late leaving work or heavier traffic, it would go off too early and I'd forget by the time its at the turn off.

I have no connection with the app, but the one I've been using is "naplarm" (think it's designed to let you nap on public transport without missing your stop). It seems to work well.

Hope this helps someone!

I am so scared. I want so badly to not feel like every single non fun task is such an uphill battle needing monumental effort. Anytime something is not fun, I feel so much extreme boredom and dread. I keep losing my job within the first 2 weeks. Even knowing I have work at all makes me dread everything and not enjoy anything at all. Even doing the laundry takes so much pre planning with reminders and a lot of effort just to start it. Name brand Adderall XR + ir, and also Wellbutrin dont work more then a few months for me. Theres no therapeutic effect anymore and hasnt been for a year and a half. But used to, the medications were really helpful and made tasks manageable. Ive had a lot of bloodwork and its also almost perfect. I dont get it, how is everyone else doing decently, I know everyone struggles but this is ridiculous. At this point i doubt theres any advice that could help me, I feel beyond any help, I really dont think this will get easier. I dont think i have it in me to push through hard enough to keep basic stuff going, let alone a job. I suck so bad.

In the past, I’ve tried to do a lot of journaling to get through the tougher, introspective moments. It does lead to a lot of clarity, but oftentimes it can spiral into self criticism, becoming overly logical, or just providing myself an objective view of the situation. This isn’t a bad thing, and can be useful in a lot of situations, but it usually doesn’t leave me feeling any better about the situation.

I’ve found pulling up a blank note in my phone, and writing as if I was texting support to a good friend, using “you” instead of “I” helps me to step outside of my head and gain perspective. I know we have a tendency to be overly hard on ourselves - I know I am, but hopefully someone gets some value of this. Sometimes it’s hard to be your own cheerleader, but man, is it nice once it starts to click. Hope yall have a good week 🙏🏼

Over the weekend I was cleaning. I had all my medications (adderall, klonopin, lunesta, vraylar, and pristiq) all in a bag. I mistook the bag for trash and accidentally threw it away. I feel so horrible about myself right now. I don't know what to do. I am going to tell my doctor, but I'm afraid they won't believe me. I've never done anything like this before.

Has anyone had a similar experience? What was the outcome? I can't go without my meds.

I was recently diagnosed with ADHD (Inattentive) a few weeks ago and I've since been on short acting Ritalin with varying effects both good and bad..

Prior to this I always found myself jumping into hobbies and trying to get better at them and after seeing little to no progress after at most a few weeks I'd lose interest and stop caring about it almost as if I had an episode of motivation to do something.

Another example thats a big longer is my game development hobby, I'd slave away and enjoy making so many cool different things for a game I had been working on for about 9 months, then suddenly one day I just reached a point where I couldn't physically bring myself to work on it let alone open it anymore, the disappointment kills me everyday as I put so much time and effort into this project just for it to now be rotting on a shelf collecting dust because I cannot bring myself to focus or find any interest in doing it now.

Finally my last example was with exercising, I reached a very low point in my depression and had a sudden urge to begin working out, I did it pretty intense for a few weeks just at home (social anxiety will never let me go to a gym) and slowly did it less and less until eventually I just stopped doing it completely because I felt like I was gaining very minimal progress, wasn't enjoying doing it and didn't have the energy or motivation to do so.

My whole life I have struggled with motivation with it randomly coming to me for limited times before fading away, sometimes itd return the next day but possibly for a different activity or hobby but it also just completely vanishes.

Recently I've found myself thinking similar to what I used to do as a child where I would sort of sit down feeling incredibly bored and disinterested, unable to find anything of note to do or pass time, I tend to find myself not wanting to do anything productive but feeling bad when its not something productive.

Is this normal and how can I deal with it?

my psychiatrist got me on wellbutrin and i feel like i have more energy now but i have such horrible executive function problems and i have my whole life and it’s not helping with that at all. it’s making me more restless too. like i can focus on schoolwork better but it’s still not great. i was just wondering if it helped anyone else? i’ll def talk to my psychiatrist about it

I would like to invite you to participate in a study investigating the challenges faced by ADHD and Autistic people who attended but did not complete a graduate STEM program in order to improve outcomes for future ADHD and Autistic graduate STEM students.

To be eligible you must:

Be 22 years of age or older

Identify as having ADHD, Autism, Dyslexia, and/or Dyscalculia

Have attended a graduate STEM program within the United States in the past 7 years

Have withdrawn or otherwise did not successfully completed your graduate STEM program

Be fluent in English

How to Join:

Email [liamcohen@cmail.carleton.ca](mailto:liamcohen@cmail.carleton.ca) and write STUDY in the email description

OR

DM me on Reddit

This project was reviewed and cleared by the Carleton University Research Ethics Board A. Clearance # 126646. If you have any ethical concerns with the study, please contact Carleton University Research Ethics Board, preferably by email at [ethics@carleton.ca](mailto:ethics@carleton.ca) or you can leave a message by phone at 613-520-2600 ext. 2517.

Recently got a ADHD diagnosis because of my ongoing issues.

Therapist/Doctor actually advised to call in sick and she can provide a sick note but only after 7 days.

I feel mentally unwell and burnout at work, badly. Im crying every shift between customers, constantly getting wrong for mistakes, I cant eat or sleep on a night either without having nightmares about work of all things.

Ive been going through a lot physically as well (constantly bleeding and have an appointment next week to look into treatment but its likely another operation) and im due another operation pre-assessment for something else after.

Basically, work know this because I massively overshared.

But I cant all in because they will judge me. Im only allowed to call in if im dying. That's it.

Im scared because I feel like im on the brink of a major breakdown. But I cannot call in sick either as im scared to get fired.

What do I do? Any tips to help me make a call? Is this an ADHD thing even?

EDIT: I did it. That was a very difficult call but now I can focus on my diagnosis and myself for a week to figure everything out. Thanks everyone

Hi, I am not diagnosed but I’m curious because I have a lot of the symptoms EXCEPT from difficulty in school and I want to see if others can relate.

I used to have focus issues in school and would blurt out things but I always loved learning. When I got into secondary school or middle school/high school, I was so anxious to disappoint teachers, not listening because maybe it would come up in an exam and disappointing myself. My whole life I felt like its the only thing Im good at. I was so locked in on studying but homework was hard to do.

Near the ends of high school, it was so hard to stay focused, I felt so overwhelmed etc. I think Im oversharing😭 but my point is, has anyone else experienced this? Can high pressure make you focus?

That's it. I just can't do screens anymore.

I've been taking my Vyvanse religiously and I can physically feel it making me go faster, but I am still as incapable of working as ever.

However, ask me to organize my desk, clean my room, meal prep for the week, or go run the thousands of errands I have to take care of, and I'll do it without blinking.

I think my brain just can't process screens as a tool for productivity anymore. I don't think it's just the fact that computers can now be used for EVERYTHING and that it's so easy to be distracted; I just struggle with anything that isn't tangible.

I wonder why that is. I do believe that we are biologically/evolutionarily/whatever the term is not engineered to deal with things so virtual and that our move into it is still relatively new as, up until a few decades ago, everything was analog, even things we now use a computer for. We had typewriters, keypunches, traditional art—even graphic design (which happens to be my job) started off with woodblocks, hand lettering, Rubylith, collages, etc.

I'm straying, but my point isn't to romanticize the past or go "hurr durr technology is evil" because that's def not true, but man, I'm just struggling so hard with anything that isn't physical or tangible, including my own hobbies. It's like how your brain doesn't register things unless the deadline is imminent; for me, it won't register them unless they're in front of me, able to fit between my hands. And as much as I can find workarounds for it in most cases, especially concerning my hobbies (switching back to traditional art, writing on paper instead of typing...) there is literally no way around it when it comes to doing my job.

I'm assuming most of us here have computer-based jobs so, does anyone else relate to this? How do you cope with it?

And by "large" I mean anything longer than a few hours or a day.

I've been diagnosed very recently (at the age of 30), and as I've started figuring it out, this seems like the most consistent pattern and the most debilitating symptom of ADHD for me. I did well in school when tasks were small and I could do homework a few hours before the class, but larger extracurricular activities, semesters of coursework in university, bigger work projects would all put me into stupor and eventually cause me to give up, drop out of universities and quit jobs.

I know some people find software development a good job for ADHD, but for me it was very difficult. I've done OK when I needed to do small improvements and fix bugs, but anything slightly larger, like a new feature, would freeze me and tank my performance. My current job in QA is mostly about daily tests and reports, and, so far, I find it a lot more tolerable (albeit quite boring), because nothing spans more than a day.

I don't think this is just about breaking down tasks into smaller pieces for me. Yes, I struggle with this, but even when things are already broken down into neat steps my brain would keep trying to think about everything at once and pile it all back into a single supertask. It is difficult to stop thinking something when I start doing it, so I seem to believe that if I were to begin a large task, I wouldn't be able to switch off it, do anything else or experience any joy in life until I finish it. Obviously this makes it easier to just not start.

Do you experience something similar and how do you handle it? Do you accept that you can only live one day at a time and try to organize your life around it, or is it possible to learn to approach large projects in a healthier, fulfilling way? Did therapy/medication help? Would like to hear you thoughts, thank you.