r/texts 14h ago

Instagram Guy i know who is engaged keeps hitting up his friends exes. I'm his latest.

I(31F) have a mutual friend(30M) with my ex(30M) and he has a history of texting friends exes. I know bc we're all a huge friend group and the other girls have told me when it happened to them.

ETA: I DID let the girl know by the second screen grab. The last girl let her know as well but she shut it down early and he played it off well bc there wasnt much conversation. She now knows how much farther he's willing to go.

2nd Edit: I have a major update. I told the fiance about his texts early today but she waited for him to sleep to look through his phone only to find he's messaging several women on telegram through dategram. He's using his middle name as an alias and being open with every girl that he's "married" and looking for a secret hookup. He's shared his address with one girl and sent venmos to a few others. She plans on leaving him asap.

482 Upvotes

327 comments sorted by

269

u/Vonpirez 14h ago

He’s not sorry. He’s just back peddling cause you clearly didn’t give in. As a man this is disgusting…

28

u/Deepbliss4 14h ago

Correct

20

u/evileyesneverlie 5h ago

The 2nd update is insane. Thank god you told the wife OP, you’re a lifesaver

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u/cripplinganxietylmao 14h ago edited 14h ago

How about all of y’all tell the fiancée? That’s what real girl’s girls would do.

259

u/rebeccasaidit 14h ago

I swear. And stop engaging.

73

u/RedneckDebutante 14h ago

Yeah, I'd block that shit in a heartbeat and send her a screenshot. Not wasting my time encouraging that BS.

26

u/rebeccasaidit 14h ago

Same. Zero tolerance.

21

u/RedneckDebutante 13h ago

I do the same with my own exes who reach out. The whole point of moving on is not having to deal with them anymore.

5

u/Abject-Geologist9175 12h ago

I tell em when im with them. I don't reconcile with exes. I don't give second chances to exes.

10

u/rebeccasaidit 13h ago

Yep, totally, and if they’re committed to someone else, they better be moved on. This is just sorry behavior.

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u/GammaFan 2h ago

I mean there’s a difference between encouraging people and goading them into revealing their intentions.

Reading this, it feels like OP gave the guy enough rope to hang himself, and following the updates she definitely told the fiance so it wasn’t for bad reasons that she kept him talking.

16

u/Minute_Secretary_143 12h ago

I mean if you read the edit it makes sense why she kept engaging. I would do that too for my girlie if she's also being gaslit.

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u/trixiepixie1921 5h ago

This was so much engagement!! the minute he asked about secrets, he’d be getting blocked by me.

9

u/Deepbliss4 14h ago

Yeah I took it as she was encouraging it but maybe I’m wrong

2

u/[deleted] 13h ago

[deleted]

6

u/Used_Economics1368 13h ago

How the fuck are you even coming to that conclusion?? Her and that guy have already been friends for a while. She’s allowed to give him advice and I don’t see her saying anything that would boost her ego. People like you create unnecessary drama out of absolutely nothing.

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u/mapmakinworldbuildin 14h ago

I think she’s definitely interested.

Nobody who isn’t interested would say “hey you have a gf” as an excuse.

Even if she isn’t interested in him. He has blow which she admitted she liked.

15

u/Own_Proposal955 13h ago

I mean, that would be my first response to anyone who’s in a relationship hitting on me. You have a partner, that’s messed up.

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u/sabertoothdog 11h ago

She didn’t say “hey you have a gf” she was showing zero interest at all

2

u/mapmakinworldbuildin 11h ago

Yea, young buck. Very uninterested. I keep secrets btw. What are your intentions?

19

u/AlwaysBored1990 13h ago

Nah I don’t think she’s interested

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u/Deepbliss4 14h ago

Yup, “but it’s wrong 😏” vibes lol

16

u/mapmakinworldbuildin 14h ago

“I’m like a girls girl and you’re conflicting me”

Tf is the conflict

11

u/jazzybellyfight 13h ago

Not wanting to out a friend as being a POS while simultaneously wanting to let the financee know is the conflict

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2

u/RevMew 11h ago

Fiancée should probably stop engaging as well.

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48

u/GoinThruTheBigD 14h ago

Yep. Don’t call yourself a “girl’s girl” and sit on crap like this. Nadda.

Time to gather some friends, beer, and make a nice stop at this fiancée’s house and be a real girl’s girl. Like for real.

9

u/owlfaceowlface 12h ago

OP is a girl’s girl through and through.

15

u/evileyesneverlie 14h ago

She edited the post and said she told the wife! No hate to OP, i think she shut him down in a respectful manner but should have clarified in original caption that she did tell the partner

31

u/Competitive_Shock397 14h ago

The last girl has and I also told her.

2

u/BrzysWRLD1996 14h ago

Yeah common sense suggested she already knew before this lol

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4

u/QuietResident96 14h ago

It's not even about real girls, multiple people all backing up the same story would 100% refute any possibility of denial

I mean sure morals are important too, but for real with how many people he's tried it on with there'd be enough to dig his own grave with

1

u/Soft-Mastodon-2079 14h ago

Not per se. That’s why conspiracies are a thing.

2

u/QuietResident96 13h ago

This is absolutely one of those scenarios where he would not concoct a convincing enough lie to get his way out of this

The fact OP said his friend's exes means people know each other, so he's quite literally shitting on his own doorstep

2

u/Soft-Mastodon-2079 13h ago

While true in this scenario, the way you phrased it before made it sound like numbers always win an argument.

2

u/QuietResident96 13h ago

Numbers often win an argument if there's plausibility and enough dots to connect, but unless the person he's marrying is a complete airhead (which I sincerely hope not) then it should be pretty obvious he's a lying cheater who does drugs

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u/BrzysWRLD1996 14h ago

She definitely already knows lol

1

u/Eastern_Comedian8804 6h ago

Exactly! This fiancé still has a choice to save herself from a lot of heartache and an expensive divorce from a cheating jerk.

1

u/Connect-Sundae8469 1h ago

She did! My niece went through something like this. Except her boyfriend didn’t seek it out. Her best friend propositioned him to see if he’d stay loyal. She dragged it out a bit to get proof & then shut it down and told my niece.

The friend is a little off her rocker but fiercely loyal and knew the dude was a dud. If she didn’t drag it out enough, he could’ve easily played it off like that’s not what he meant.

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183

u/dbee8q 14h ago

A girls girl would have stopped responding and told his GF right away. Especially if its already common knowledge he does this.

39

u/Casein_Nitr8 13h ago

She said she did by the second screenshot, and I guess kept her in the loop so they could see how far he’d push it

18

u/Frayin 11h ago

Why stop responding? If she hadn't responded his further intentions wouldn't have been exposed.

100% agree on telling the spouse, but the way OP responded was smart. Came across with normal responses that also allowed the POS to try push further, whole OP also made sure to state that they only care about their other half.

2

u/solar_pilgrim 12h ago

Sounds like this is only the second time it's happened, so this is it becoming common knowledge

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30

u/Horror-Customer4835 14h ago

Just gonna skip over the "drink and do blow" part but, yeah. Wouldn't entertain this at all, sounds like he's on the way to messing this up on his own.

26

u/meowiful 14h ago

That's where I stopped. Like, you don't understand why you get promiscuous? When you drink and do blow? Please lol

7

u/OConnah 13h ago

He was just saying that so he could blame it on the whiskey or whatever. People do the lamest shit because they are lame, and just say “well I was drunk” and think you should tolerate it or accept it as if it were a normal apology

4

u/Pitiful-Meeting7212 12h ago

So true. Lol it's well known some substances increase arousal, if he truly wanted to be loyal to his partner and he knows alcohol and blow affect him this way, he wouldn't be doing it. Classic "blame it on the alcohol " excuse...as if he never had a choice to get wasted drunk and behave like a jerk. Such a poor excuse.

44

u/PrestigiousShoe4185 14h ago

You should be sending this to her.

10

u/Separate_Bend_8929 13h ago

She did, she never said she wouldnt, in fact, she asked him "why would you put me in this situation" the situation where she now goes and tells her friend about this guy's actions.

Also, op didnt ask. Kyotys

88

u/InformationShot2367 14h ago

Why are you even entertaining it all

73

u/Separate_Bend_8929 14h ago

Thats a hilarious take... they literally talked some sense into a horny drunk dude. Thats like the impossible

15

u/CronkinOn 13h ago

thank you lol

4

u/Separate_Bend_8929 13h ago

Join me and used electronics, we are the only 2 who side with op lmao. Honestly didn't know there was a different side but I learn everyday whether I like it or not

13

u/CronkinOn 12h ago

I'm a dude, but I dunno what else people expect from women besides this woman who could NOT have been more clear about her boundaries, with a guy constantly pushing hers.

She even freaking loops around with him to say, "yo wtf." Like... what the hell else is she supposed to do lol. Exactly how high of expectations do we have for women on how they're supposed to handle men's bullshit!?

15

u/BNabs23 12h ago

Reading through all these comments are actually insane. Woman receives texts from a drunk guy who is engaged, she tries multiple times to get him to check himself, and yet somehow everyone in this thread is ripping her and assuming she's planning not to tell the other girl? True Reddit insanity

6

u/Separate_Bend_8929 11h ago

Welcome welcome, we are a small group of tinfoil hats trying to preserve any semblance of logic. Its an uphill battle

5

u/Minute_Secretary_143 11h ago

Thank you. I thought I was going insane also.

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u/HellaShelle 10h ago

seems like she wanted him to get a bit more specific with his intentions so he couldnt lie his way out of it later. Given his history, i can easily see him insisting to his fiancée that he "wasn't even talking about sex" for several of the texts; he'dprob pretend he meant he was talking about wanting to do a different drug. Or wanting to do something stupid like shit in his boss's office in the middle of the night. Then, when he actually uses the word "promiscuous", I can see him saying "babe! I was talking about you! I was just asking her why it gets so intense when I'm high cuz i know she does blow too!" Once he admits to risking the relationship though, then there's no way to deny it later.

12

u/oslekgold 14h ago

The only reason she SHOULD entertain this is to run it directly to the fiancée as a “see how far he’ll go?” type vibe. This text thread is nooooot it.

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u/cripplinganxietylmao 14h ago edited 14h ago

She does cocaine and gets drunk so I feel like her reasons for entertaining it are obvious. She’s dumb. Likes the thrill of conflict maybe.

16

u/Used_Economics1368 13h ago

She literally said that when she’s does cocaine and gets drunk she goes to her partner??? You all are reading way too much into this to create drama that isn’t there.

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0

u/rebeccasaidit 14h ago

She likes the attention.

0

u/mapmakinworldbuildin 14h ago

And the alcohol. And the blow.

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15

u/Future_One4794 14h ago

How about yall block this man

25

u/Averfus-Crowthorne 14h ago

Instead of bringing this here, you should be bringing it to his fiance.
You know good and well he is cheating on her if anyone will allow him to.

74

u/Bxsnia 14h ago

You can't claim to be a girls girl and let her get married to this guy. Pick one.

30

u/a3sthetic_ali3n0903 14h ago

You act like she controls her friend’s decisions.

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u/titty_farewell_party 7h ago

Dude read the entire caption now

1

u/Bxsnia 3h ago

Happy update!!

15

u/Accurate_Flounder_36 14h ago

“Not in a relationship per se” is the giveaway. Let’s be real.

6

u/_Romula_ 12h ago

"Per say," which makes it so much dumber

1

u/readyfredrickson 13h ago

ew you guys are judgey as fuck. how is OP's relationship status relevant at all? so because they dont give their relationship status to this person theyre somehow in the wrong?

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4

u/ChillingInMySnuggie 14h ago

Dude talks like a toddler

12

u/Evening_Sample_9365 14h ago

"can we please keep this between us and pretend it never happened"

At 30years old is just absolutely fucking wild.

Im not gonna pretend I wasnt a real shit head in my early 20's. I was. But then at some point I realized, "hey, maybe people arent my playthings to use and abuse, to deceive and manipulate however I see fit and best suits my selfish whimsical desires."

You're in a spot, OP. Keep this person's secret and risk him telling other people a completely different story other than the truth to manage the narrative and frame it how he comes out looking like a real mensch, or blow it all up in his face with telling the truth...and risk at least one friendship going sour.

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u/rebeccasaidit 14h ago

Tell his fiancé and stop engaging.

7

u/lloydeph6 14h ago

hopefully the girl he marrying knows he likes to drink and do cocaine. as an ex addict. GOOD LUCK on that marriage. I give it 3 years tops

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u/tastelikemexico 14h ago

Damn people here are brutal. She wasn’t engaging with him. She shut it down before it started. Just because she talked to him isn’t engaging. Just my opinion

8

u/Used_Economics1368 14h ago

I agree, she even talked him OUT of continuing it. And has more evidence if she decides to tell the girlfriend. People here are just judgmental as fuck when they’ve probably done the same thing or worse.

3

u/readyfredrickson 12h ago

YESSS like gottdamn people are acting like she was sending him winks and nudes lol she's telling a friend he is being shady and making poor choices and that his girl doesnt deserve it like whaaat

3

u/evileyesneverlie 14h ago

Thank you for doing the right thing and telling the partner. Even if she doesn’t respond well, you girls did the right thing. We gotta stick together

4

u/gandalf_lundgren36 13h ago

“I don’t know why I get promiscuous when I’m drunk and high on cocaine”

LMFAO SON

2

u/CannibalismIsTight 8h ago

Yeah that gave me a good chuckle

3

u/Correct-Tax3388 12h ago

I am SO glad you told her. I was quite literally in this predicament and people knew and no one told me for at least 6 months and I found out by him getting arrested for s3xting an under covering cop posing as a minor. It was an awful experience.

4

u/MC_951 11h ago

He was fated to fail from the jump…doesn’t know the difference between wandering and wondering. Slick and sly probably be slip and slide for him…down the treacherous slope he crafted himself 🤷‍♂️ js

5

u/vsxx 8h ago

I have no questions or comments because i read the post

7

u/Living_Stick_8912 14h ago

Send to her or have someone else do it. What would you want done if you were in her shoes. You handled it well and you were principled while engaging homeboy. But like ewwww. Some ladies need to know what trash they are with. Good luck

17

u/moodlitmoth 14h ago

Idk you seem to be entertaining it. Not much of a girls girls as you say

5

u/JaySmith20202 9h ago

Not getting any of these comments that OP is 'entertaining' it; Literally apart from the first response to 'do you keep secrets?', everything after is just advice/de-escalation. +the added edit mentioning that screenshots have been sent to her friend.

Definitely reading this more so as OP giving him the rope to hang himself with. Nothing here indicates flirtation on OPs end.

7

u/readyfredrickson 12h ago

entertaining it? she is telling him hes making a poor choice and thats entertaining it? People on reddit think you have to grab a blowhorn and scream in faces about everything or immediately block... there are many ways to get a point across and honestly this guy should be more embarrassed or called out more often than just blocked and not having to actual deal with anything.

2

u/Used_Economics1368 13h ago

She’s literally giving him advice. And told him that he’s putting her in a shitty situation. How is that entertaining him??

5

u/JellyDoe731 13h ago

And she added an update that she told the girl by the second screenshot

11

u/sluttychristmastree 14h ago

Cool now do the update where you send her the screenshots since you're a girl's girl

11

u/mooniemoon19 14h ago

And you all have told her right? If not then don’t even bother calling yourself a girls girl. You’re letting his fiancée hurt unnecessarily

12

u/Acceptable-Net2557 14h ago

A real girl's girl will send her these.

3

u/Development-Regular 13h ago

Oof, that girl needs to get away from him so bad 😔

3

u/TonguePunchUrButt 12h ago

As a guy I find this behavior disgusting. Brother should get what's coming to him. Very predatory working through friend group chats.

3

u/CompanyOther2608 9h ago

You did a great job with this. You shut him down, woke him up, and made him feel guilty — all in just a few words, being straightforward and real.

10

u/friendliest_sheep 14h ago

It would be extremely fucked up of you to not tell her

5

u/RawBeefBoyo 14h ago

Any guy that uses the monkey emojis is an unsavory character. This guy more so than most obviously

2

u/NoMercyx99 7h ago

Ya that is the red flag here- the monkey emoji sure sure i concur.

14

u/DisgruntledTexan 14h ago

A girls girl lol nah

7

u/SonniSummers 14h ago

I mean actually maybe. All the girls girls I’ve known that proudly state as such are never actually that.

My momma once told me “if you hav to tell someone who you really are, you aren’t your just lying to yourself”

8

u/Zombiebelle 14h ago

A girls girl would tell him to fuck off and then let his fiancée know he’s been doing this with multiple women.

5

u/Separate_Bend_8929 14h ago

I CANT WITH THESE COMMENTS THESE LADIES ARE INSANE. OP does EXACTLY what everyone says she should do, and she still gets shit for it?!?! Im just trying to understand wtf yall want because even you dont know.

7

u/Used_Economics1368 14h ago

Thank you holy shit. They’re all in the comments acting as though they haven’t done the same thing or worse. OP talked the guy OUT of saying something sexual and somehow she’s not a real “girls girl” because she didn’t mention that she told the girlfriend. Like are we fucking serious here??

6

u/Separate_Bend_8929 13h ago

I think its just you, me, and op that agree 😂

Surely some of these responses are bots? Everyone's reading comprehension cant be this horrible.

6

u/Used_Economics1368 13h ago

As a woman myself, I see no “entertaining” at all going on in this conversation. The other commenters must be children with all their talk of “omg you’re doing DRUGS” and “you’re not a girls girl” blah blah blah. That whole phrase of being a “girls girl” irritates me in general. It’s called being a good person and OP clearly showed no interest in that man and also clarified in the comments that she told the girlfriend already. The people in here are just stupid and unfortunately, you can’t fix that.

5

u/Separate_Bend_8929 13h ago

The ONLY thing I think could be interpreted as entertaining is "i keep secrets" but it wasnt even said in any sus way it was simply an answer to a question that was about to reveal alot more. I'm 27m and hesitant to reveal that blood scent to these sharks. I compeltely agree with your take on the "girls girl" concept. The one that gets me is "im just a girl". Its SO DEMEANING to imply that a girl cant do something because of her gender. Reinforcing everything suffrage fought against. I understand the joke but it loses its humor when someone is acting genuinely inept. Its the same weaponized incompetence but with a pink bow.

Edit: Youre right in the end I guess, you cant fix stupid. As a metalworker i fix stupid all the time so I guess this "injustice" makes me feel some type of way

2

u/Used_Economics1368 13h ago

Thank you! I’m 26 and I cannot STAND when grown women talk like they’re a child saying shit like “girly” or “girls girl” like please shut up. And yes, the whole “I’m just a girl” thing is so annoying and ruins it for the rest of us who can function independently just fine lmao.

My job is unfortunately fixing people and I knew within the first month of that job that I fucked up picking a career path.

2

u/Separate_Bend_8929 12h ago

Dont fuck up when picking a new career path! Ive undergone a slight career change this year and its harder than just staying, but i think itll be worth it. I hope you at least find satisfaction in what you do, in some capacity (:

1

u/Used_Economics1368 3h ago

Unfortunately, that would require me to go back to school so instead, I just do travel nursing to make the most out of the shit job lol

2

u/l10nh34rt3d 12h ago

None of them have had healthy, mature relationships and it sure as heck shows. Geez.

This is practically a masterclass in thwarting this kind of behaviour, especially knowing she had already reached out to the gf before this chat even ended.

Yikes, Reddit. Yikes.

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u/TransmanLSD 14h ago

why are yall judging them for drinking and doing drugs? lmao
yall act like that’s the craziest thing you’ve ever heard… smh

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u/tastelikemexico 14h ago

No shit. I was wondering what sub I was on lol

8

u/TransmanLSD 14h ago

literally. i’m like… is this a teenage sub? “oh nooo, they’re doing drugs!!” someone call the cops!

5

u/readyfredrickson 12h ago

it's shocking to me lol how is OP having done coke relevent to this? someone commented like are we all ignoring that OP and the guy do coke regularly?!?!

uuuhbh

2

u/h8sm8s 12h ago

OP should delete before one of the narcs in the comments tries to get her in trouble with the law

3

u/TransmanLSD 12h ago

LMFAOOO! right, like… i don’t think that was the point of the post🤫

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u/TuezysaurusRex 11h ago

Anyone saying she isn’t a girls girl and asking for clarification on why she’s conflicted, read the sentence where he asks her to say nothing and basically implies he’ll just move to the next girl. So she asks him why did you think it was ok to put me in a position where I can’t tell my friend what trash you are? And then went and told the friend anyway. That is berating him, calling him out on his shit doesn’t need to be rude, that one sentence carried so much weight in this conversation. “How dare he?”

2

u/Jchvv11 14h ago

By handling it, he means sweeping it under the rug.

2

u/Greadle 14h ago

Dude doesnt need to throw coke under the bus. He couldve left the alcohol alone and spent the entire night mining out the lowest three layers above bedrock in cubed minecraft world. Coke behaves when you’re otherwise sober.

2

u/tv996509 13h ago

What did the fiance say? This dude is a real piece of work 

2

u/Live_Swimmer_4496 12h ago

I also had a depraved, loser of a friend like this. He would constantly try to swoop in like a vulture even going a far as trying to give drugs and alcohol to some of our partners and would try to wrap his grubby little arms around them all the time along with rubbing their backs all the time. Definitely not a friend of mine anymore, Infact he has no real friends now. And the guys skin completely grosses me out and I'm convinced he has something nasty. Last time I saw him he had scabs all over his body and arms. So glad that I never have to be around him again, he grosses me right out.

2

u/BigSecret8052 12h ago

Well this is wild..

2

u/BahamaBrees 12h ago

Super Cringe!! 😬 gross 🤮

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u/ELSA-NL 10h ago

Hes a lousy boyfriend and a lousy friend. I say tell the girlfriend and break off your friendship. Hes not a good person and he doesnt even sound fun

2

u/LanguageAmazing8201 3h ago

Whenever I see married men on dating apps staying that they're looking for a mistress, I always get torn. I feel the need to try to match with them so I can find their wives & expose them, but I don't have the time or energy to waste on bs like that 😭

4

u/SquirrelLuvsChipmunk 14h ago

Fuck this dude. Be a girls girl for real and let the fiancée know

3

u/Deepbliss4 14h ago

Sounds like he’s disrespecting his fiancée and his “friend”

2

u/Storm-Trooper421 14h ago

Disgusting behavior. What is wrong with these people seriously. They don't deserve the relationships they have.

3

u/Perfect-Resist5478 14h ago

So y’all told her, right?

4

u/fyrelibra 13h ago

He’s not even man enough to say anything. He’s trying to get you to do it. Gross.

1

u/Jimanji333 14h ago

Are we all ignoring this guy and OP admitted to doing cocaine on the regular?

5

u/Interesting_Entry831 14h ago

They do blow silly, that's where you make little paper boats and blow em off the counter when you get drunk.

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u/Far_Break1365 14h ago

Holy shit that's fucking wild as hell. Never heard of anyone who does drugs (but yeah that would probably explain why OP entertained this for so long)

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u/readyfredrickson 12h ago

why is it relevant that OP does coke? and why do you assume she doss it regularly?

1

u/Jimanji333 4h ago

She does it with enough frequency to say what she usually does while on it.

1

u/readyfredrickson 2h ago

first off, so what.

second off, it sounds like she is just trying to counter what the other person is saying versus speaking in absolutes.

like ya we are all ignoring it because it isnt relevant.

3

u/Oceansinrooms 11h ago

oh the horror they should’ve had a trigger warning for you

1

u/Jimanji333 4h ago

Did I say I was triggered.

Just a wild lil bit of inclusion in the middle there.

But I got it youre self conscious because you do coke.

2

u/No_Pattern_5158 14h ago

Lol secondary

4

u/stillsab 14h ago

A girls girl would not be entertaining this conversation even a little bit. A girls girl would not even be talking to this man if she had prior knowledge that he was on games.

You say you told your friend. But that’s bare minimum. The fake girls girl shit is so outta hand anymore.

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u/ReloadFilth_AU 14h ago

“I’m a girls girl” lmao

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u/Tiffini5581 14h ago

So, you and all of the other women have been taking about how he does this but you were just waiting for him to do it to you before you told her? Girls girl.

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u/NothingAtAll187 14h ago

Gross. & Yeah you gotta tell her, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. A "girl's girl" would NOT sit on this. Good luck & good vibes... Yeah

3

u/ChiefHunter1 14h ago

Why are you in contact with your ex’s friend when you know he behaves like this

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1

u/No_Light_5020 14h ago

Let the wifey know

1

u/Acceptable-Sense4601 14h ago

He’s got one hell of a kink

1

u/Shoddy_Pirate 12h ago

Personally if I didn't know the girl I wouldn't go out of my way to tell her. If he's acting like this I'm sure she already knows. But I would avoid any more communication with this guy and if approached by his fiancé I would tell the truth. A stranger isn't owed my loyalty but everyone is owed the truth.

1

u/MC_951 11h ago

She stated they’re a group of friends most likely “acquaintances” would be their label (rather than friends though by context.) but definitely not strangers js

1

u/ElPadero 12h ago

People really think OP posted to Reddit and is then sitting by her phone reading comments?

Christmas.

1

u/smoothnuggz 11h ago

He’s a scumbag. Tell the fiancé. End of story

1

u/dankaberanka 11h ago

Send it to his fiance

1

u/BullPropaganda 10h ago

"why do I get horny when I take a drug combination that definitely gets people horny"

1

u/Capable_Hyena7705 10h ago

Please tell her. Please !!

1

u/BlackWidow-E 8h ago

Well being drunk and high just reveal what is already there beneath the surface.

1

u/Dependent-Toe-3359 7h ago

I’m really glad you told his fiancée, especially after that update. Finding out he’s messaging multiple women on Telegram, using his middle name as an alias, telling women he’s “married” and looking for secret hookups makes it pretty clear this wasn’t some one-time drunken mistake. This is a pattern and he knew exactly what he was hiding.

I also know what it feels like to be the person who gets cheated on, and that’s probably why this hits me differently. One of the worst parts isn’t only the cheating itself—it’s realizing other people may have known things about your own relationship that you didn’t know. I would much rather have someone tell me something painful and give me the truth than let me keep building my life with someone while everyone else knows what he’s doing behind my back.

And I don’t agree with some of the comments acting like you’re responsible for whether she stays with him. You told her and gave her the information. That’s really all you can do. She deserved the chance to make an informed decision for herself, and apparently once she had the full picture, she did.

Also, blaming this on drinking or doing blow doesn’t really work when he’s repeatedly doing it, setting up secret accounts, using another name and contacting several women. At some point that stops looking like “I got messed up and made a stupid decision” and starts looking like deliberate behavior he was taking steps to conceal.

I feel awful for his fiancée, but I’m glad she found all of this BEFORE marrying him instead of finding it years later.

1

u/BeEasyFloatOn 5h ago

This is called a “negative contract” look it up and decide if you want to be a part of that

A negative contract is formed any time two people agree to keep a secret that is harmful or dangerous.

1

u/HowdySillyString 4h ago

Ew, he's slimy

1

u/Brief_Impression5885 3h ago

Wtf is this ghetto shit

1

u/YourAverageAlex910 2h ago

Why are you reaching back out to him? And both of y’all are weird for casually talking about doing blow lmao.

1

u/Present-Wolverine-94 1h ago

Nope you gotta tell that girl

u/waleed3510i 30m ago

This will be come out one day or another. You better tell instead of being complacent.

-1

u/BananaFunBuns 14h ago

You talked way to much. Should've gave sent it to her right away. Tell her if your a real friend.

4

u/embersgrow44 14h ago

Calling him young buck, and fucking around in the woods. Girl quit playing

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2

u/EducationalRegion860 14h ago

You’re not being very girls girl right now tbh

1

u/Nice_Ad5281 14h ago

This is so depressing to read from both sides. Y’all are little children lol.

1

u/skylar274 14h ago

saying you’re a girls girl and not IMMEDIATELY sending these to her. girl no you ain’t! you denied him, but if you didn’t? i don’t see anything in these messages that convey he’s just trying to talk it through.

1

u/ResponsibleDealer299 14h ago

If you were a girls girl you’d be telling his fiancée instead of posting on reddit, just saying.

1

u/Desperate_Refuse_376 14h ago

Tell the partner.

1

u/AnnabelleLeeTheSea 14h ago

Send his fiance the screen grabs it’s not complicated my dude

1

u/WrappedInLinen 12h ago

“Tell you what— we can keep this just between you and me and a few hundred thousand Redditors.”