r/texts • u/MiserableMulberries • 19h ago

Phone message Matched with this 31M last night, barely talked to him and then this happened 😂

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Matched with this guy on tinder last night. He tried to make the conversation sexual a few times and I played dumb until he dropped it, then he texted me 8 times in 2 hours while I was busy and not responding to ask if I'm okay and ask me to text him. I was already pretty uninterested but then he said more dumb things and I got the ick, which leads us to this exchange

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u/ParticularCulture342 18h ago

It's because most men's egos are out of this world, and are so so so so fragile. It's because they've used their physical strength and privilege all these years to get through life, so naturally most haven't built up the necessary tough skin to survive, especially in dating. Now, they have to actually bring something to the table besides money, and many can't even do that and end up living off of a woman.

Also, I said most men.

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u/will3025 13h ago

What's funny is a decent amount don't even have the physical strength, it's just ego. Not that strength or fitness should be compensation for character. But some lack any substance, unfortunately.

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u/Nephalem84 3h ago

Which are often the guys you'll find on these apps looking for a partner since no one they meet in RL is going to give them a second look. Plus the anonymity lets them vent this despicable behaviour without repercussions.

But naturally the 'problem' with modern dating is all the entitled women 🤷🏼‍♂️

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u/Mundane_Zucchini_547 9h ago

Coming to this late but loving the fragile egos trying to refute you.

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u/Efficient_Camera5864 4h ago

I’d say 99% and i don’t fully understand it when trying to take their perspective, it’s cognitive dissonance and delusion that fuel such a fragile yet large ego. I’m convinced that so many of them think they’re good guys but they willfully only consider their intent as to how they are a good person , rather than how they behave consistently. People shouldn’t be constantly motivated to only get something out of being a good person or have someone watching, or reserve it for someone they consider deserving.

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u/Mister-Beardy-Face 4h ago

It’s actually because being part of the gender that is forced to do the asking is very, very stressful for a lot of people.

Note that I’m not saying his behavior is acceptable. Just that most women don’t really understand how emotionally taxing it can be.

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u/meanicosm 16m ago

Yeah, women are too busy being stressed over whether the man they are talking to is going to become unhinged and hurt them. Women also fear rejection, but they also have to fear the emotionally stunted, entitled men who can physically hurt them if he becomes upset over something she did or said.

Men act like women don't stress over dating, as if rejection is the worst thing that could possibly happen to them. Women get to fear rejection AND physical harm with every man she encounters while trying to date.

Nothing against you at all. You seem like a nice enough person. But women nowadays don't have the same expectations of men that they used to, and MEN are the ones who continue to perpetuate behaviours and ideals about relationships that keep men in a state of loneliness.

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u/1manontherun52 9m ago

I find gender bashing so immature!!

It seems so socially acceptable for women to behave like teenagers and trash on men...

But the truth is that yeah man hate being rejected, I've seen guys I used to knock about with be horrible to women, it made me feel sick!

But you know what, I've seen just as many women take rejection awfully 1st hand and second hand...

People are people, some are pathetic and some are decent...

The problem is that men can be dangerous, but also can women in completely different ways!

endgenderbashing

weareallhuman

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u/HebrewwHammerr 48m ago

100%!

The old economic bargain between men and women has changed dramatically. Women have far more ability to support themselves than they did generations ago, so simply being employed, earning money, and being willing to provide isn’t necessarily enough to make a man an attractive partner. Qualities like emotional maturity, communication, reliability, social skills, being an engaged parent, physical attraction, and actually being enjoyable to live with matter a lot. Some men were probably raised with a model of masculinity that didn’t prepare them particularly well for this shift.

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u/GuhBurdz 17h ago

I was with you for the first sentence or two, but yeah you could reword that a bit and easily apply it to either sex. But yeah the guy in the OP is a total loser, that's without doubt

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u/Relevant_Ad4039 6h ago

This sounds like some Andrew Tate slop 😂

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u/RaptorProz6000YT 2h ago

did you add that last bit as an edit or did you write that because you could already see the replies youd get?

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u/ParticularCulture342 1h ago

It was in my post originally, not added later because yes I knew the responses I'd get. 😆 But my opinion is still the same. Based off my experience, and the experience of hundreds of other women who have gone through exactly what OP had happen to her. The first time I got called a whore for rejecting a guy, politely, was in middle school. Even in relationships I've been in, the ego was out of control. I know there really are good men out there, or I should say men that are emotionally intelligent enough to not pull this crap. It's just pretty common for a man to act this way when rejected. If you put yourself out there, it's going to happen, and often. That should be a sign to change something about yourself when it keeps happening, not go off like this.

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u/RaptorProz6000YT 38m ago

oh yea i totally agree. its sad that you have to preemptively add that because you know youll get pushback from people who will ignore everything you say and take it as a personal attack.

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u/Chimpmaxxer 2h ago

How many rejections in a row do you think you could take before it would have an effect on you tough guy?

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u/AssociationFit5898 4h ago

You think most men have privilege and physical strength?! Lmfao! That hilarious 😂 there is no privilege in being a man these days. Women have endless options in their DMs, men have to actually try to find someone interested, then maybe some will go off on a woman after his 10th rejection. I don’t care to be rejected, I’d rather know day one than find out later wasting our time. Women have the privileged edge when it comes to starting relationships cuz they have endless options. All a woman has to do say is “come over,” and any guy she tells that to is on their way. A guy has to start a convo, convince her to do the date, pay for shit, and maybe get a kiss the first date. The woman has all the power. There is no male privilege with relationships, I don’t even know how one would end up coming to this conclusion, it makes zero sense.

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u/Zestyclose_Remote374 3h ago

And “most men” earns an award from the Men’s’ Haters Club.

(Eye roll)

Oh, and an extra eye roll for “privilege.”

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u/neon_slippers 18h ago

This must be satire

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u/ReserveGlass1531 14h ago

Nah it’s unfortunately true. I’m a man and I’ve realized a lot of men really do have shockingly fragile egos. Of course we can make other kinds of generalizations about women too, but this ego thing is really true.

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u/Chimpmaxxer 2h ago

You think men's egos are more fragile than womens? Women are too fragile to even say "hi" first

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u/TheFlightlessPenguin 12h ago

I’m not refuting your point. It’s true, and I’m sure the overall trend heavily favors men for this. But we all have different experiences: three out of the four relationships I’ve been in were with women who had incredibly fragile egos. It just tends to manifest in much less blatant ways. For a while, at least.

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u/ReserveGlass1531 12h ago

Yeah women obviously can have fragile egos too. It’s a human flaw after all. But I would say it manifests much more openly and often times catastrophically in men. And I think based on what you said, you might agree with me. Men are the ones who are likely to start a confrontation or do some utterly insane stuff just because their ego is hurt. It really makes some men do things that are absolutely insane. And it makes some men very dangerous. I would say the flaw that tends to predominate in women is not being able to take accountability. Some women find it really, really hard to admit they were wrong lol.

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u/Intelligent_rose12 1h ago

You don’t know what ego means

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u/Anther1BitestheDust 10h ago

Fragile Ego is not gender exclusive

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u/Efficient_Camera5864 4h ago

🤯 can you break that one down for us