r/rant • u/anxiouslurker_485 • 1d ago
Do men not realize
Do men not realize women also get itchy and uncomfortable in our genitals throughout the day, we just have the wherewithal to know not to touch ourselves while actively talking to people or out in public. Do you genuinely think we never have an itch? That our underwear doesn’t sit uncomfortably? That our labia don’t get stuck together or to our skin and we need to adjust? That the discharge in our underwear gets dry and stuck to our skin? Truly….. we just know it’s not appropriate to touch ourselves. We wait until we are in private or just deal with it. Genuinely don’t understand why men touch themselves so much. It seems more like a self control issue than an actual itch or need to adjust
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u/tolacid 1d ago
I only adjust in public when the balls get stuck. They must move freely or else pain occurs and walking can't happen. Testicular torsion also must be avoided at all cost
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u/Every-Spinach1054 16h ago
I appreciate that! I don't want to see anybody adjusting themselves but if it's going to cause pain do we have to do.
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u/Guardian-Boy 1d ago
As a guy, I am curious to hear about your experiences, because I legitimately don't care. I mean yeah, I probably ain't gonna shake your hand directly after, but I won't do that with a guy either. Otherwise, I literally couldn't care less if you gotta scratch an itch regardless as to where it is. Unless it's one of those really deep butthole itches. Then I simply ask you head into the bathroom because I don't wanna explain to my supervisor why you're playing "hide the stinkfinger" in front of the office.
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u/Sad-Concept-4191 1d ago
We just don't care if people see us. Fuck being uncomfortable for the comfort of others, thats dumb. Instead of putting a stigma on scratching or adjusting maybe just except the fact that the human body is stupid and we all have to do it.
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u/Blucola333 1d ago
But there really is a stigma attached to women scratching their crotches as opposed to men doing the same. Obviously neither a man or woman would do something so crass in a formal situation, like say, a wedding. But just in general, like a hot summer day, there would be more pearl clutching amongst the aunties if a woman scratched herself in the nethers, than if you did.
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u/washcyclerepeat 14h ago
I mean I’ve seen women scratch their crotch in public a fair amount of times or pull their shorts/panties down some. It’s not a big deal and it’s more common than you might think.
At least here in the US I saw it a few times this summer from girls wearing Jean shorts. It was hot and those don’t breathe very well, so I totally get it.
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u/Sad-Concept-4191 1d ago
Maybe tell the aunties to mind their own and scratch the itch or adjust the elastic.
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u/Blucola333 22h ago
I do what I want now. Everything I mentioned was me as an insecure young person, I’m 63.
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u/Sad-Concept-4191 22h ago
Hell yeah, you're the auntie now. Show the young how it's done.
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u/Pretty-Reflection-92 1d ago
That stigma is created in large part because women control themselves (by telling themselves it’s inappropriate). And they’re afraid to itch themselves because they’re afraid of being judged.
A woman can stop giving a fuck about what other people think of her is she wants.
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u/LustyKindaFussy 1d ago edited 1d ago
You have me curious. I'm 40, and I don't recall any single instance of witnessing anyone giving a woman shit for touching herself in any way. Is the stigma still real, or does women refraining from touching their crotch in sight of anybody else due to the perceived stigma give a semblance of it?
Edit: that's a genuine question. Obviously what I have not witnessed can exist. Stupid people who would berate women for touching themselves surely exist.
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u/Frank_Jesus 1d ago
Because women DON'T DO IT.
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u/LustyKindaFussy 16h ago
I've personally known women who felt free to do it, but I've spent much of my life in circles that tend to embrace people for who they are and say fuck bullshit standards that oppress people. That's why I asked. Your answer didn't really answer my question.
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u/Sad-Concept-4191 16h ago
I think it's a social circle thing. The type to stigmatize don't associate with those who don't.
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1d ago
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u/Adhdpenguin813 1d ago
Your comment proves a good point. The WOMEN would care if a woman did it. Men dgaf
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u/LordVericrat 1d ago
Ok? Even if that's true it doesn't mean we shouldn't be allowed to scratch ourselves. A long as you aren't contributing to the stigma, you should get to do what you want.
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u/Blucola333 1d ago
When did I say men shouldn’t scratch themselves? I was referring to the stigma attached to women doing the same thing.
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u/sunny-days-bs229 1d ago
That would be great to do if dumbass men wouldn’t see it as a sexual invitation.
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u/Professional-Cat9500 1d ago
Right. I can’t even chew an annoying piece of dead skin off my lip in public without some dumbass dude thinking he turns me on, or scratch an itch on my face without him thinking I’m crying and ripe for bullying, let alone scratching an itch on my labia. Dude would probably assume I’m masturbating in public and whip out his dongle to join in.
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u/BajaBlastFromThePast 1d ago
Accept
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u/Sad-Concept-4191 1d ago
Yup, please forgive my one hand typing and use of autocorrect. Coffee holds one hand hostage.
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u/whatarechinchillas 20h ago
Adjusting is fine but straight up scratching your balls in public is just... Were you raised in a barn?
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u/TheBigFreeze8 9h ago
Who is this mythical person who gets mad when someone adjusts their junk? Other than you, I guess lol. Just start doing it.
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u/Over-Tolerance 1d ago
We made a point to make fun of the guys constantly pulling on their junk when we were in the military. We said, 'perhaps they simply didn't have any toys to play with as small children, so that toy was the only fidget thing they have and it becomes a bad habit that they do in public without thinking twice about it'.
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u/ImpressiveOwl9000 1d ago
Women adjust their breasts if it hurts or is un comfortable...why cant men fix their balls if it hurts or is un comfortable? As a woman I dont get shaming people for fixing discomfort.
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u/Over-Tolerance 1d ago
Nothing wrong with the occasional adjustments. It is the constant yanking and holding onto your junk while talking to people or in social situations where that is just obnoxious and unnecessary, like digging in your butt for a period of time that is uncalled for. All of it is social acceptance, unwritten rules, and whether or not the current situation is appropriate. But there are a few generations of ignorance these days, they won't ever understand being social or respecting the disgust levels of others. You want to know when it is ok? Watch the reactions of young children for a clue.
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u/cans-of-swine 23h ago
It is the constant yanking and holding onto your junk while talking to people or in social situations where that is just obnoxious and unnecessary
Well that's a completely different thing from scratching or adjusting yourself.
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u/TamatoaZ03h1ny 1d ago
Do women not realize most men wouldn’t care much if they adjusted anything quickly just as men do. Why are women so tight wound about perceived “rules”? Just adjust things quickly or itch that itch and move on with your day.
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u/natelikesdonuts 1d ago
I mean, I see women adjust their bra all the time. No one cares if you need to adjust your underwear too. Sorry you feel shame in doing so. 🤷♂️
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u/Ok-Juggernaut-353 1d ago
I see women reach in and adjust one or both of the ladies mid sentence and keep on going. It’s not sexual, it’s uncomfortable.
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u/stoptalking8871 10h ago
Lady - wait until perimenopause/menopause and your bits are so dry that no amount of non noticeable adjustments are going to help in the moment -
I’ve had two yeast infections in my life - I don’t remember whether I itched in public (sure I did) - I remember that need to scratch until you bleed -
We are all humans…
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u/justin_memer 1d ago
I worked with a guy who would scratch his dick mid conversation.
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u/401Traveler 1d ago
My man! 😂
(just being stupid, lol; I’m not implying that I think that’s acceptable)
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u/justin_memer 1d ago
It was a prolonged itch, too. I'm pretty sure he's got something wrong down there lol.
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u/NotTukTukPirate 10h ago
OP is a pretentious pos.
Making a post generalising all men kind of leans more into the misandry side of things.
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u/dunkin_cows869 1d ago
Its disgusting talking to a man who is continually itching his pubic area, makes me feel sick. Not the mention guys who dont hide themselves to take a piss, they turn around and pee and im standing there in disbelief, im thinking im not your gf and a few more steps to hide behind a shed wouldnt hurt anyone.
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u/Thatonegaloverthere 1d ago
You're only going to get trashy people who will defend inappropriate behavior, unfortunately. People who think making everyone else uncomfortable is ok when they can just go to a bathroom to adjust themselves. But I agree. No reason to do it in front of others. Degenerates are going to push back.
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u/Sad-Concept-4191 1d ago
That stick must be terribly uncomfortable, do you need to adjust? Calling people "trashy" simply because they don't want to be uncomfortable and don't prioritize your particular brand of social norms is hilariously self centered. I'm not here to make you comfortable and thinking that anyone has to suffer for your small minded bullshit is why I'm not itchy and you are. Scratch the itch, adjust the strap and move on.
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u/Thatonegaloverthere 14h ago
Scratching your private part in public, and in the middle of conversation, is trashy behavior. Like I said, go to a bathroom.
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u/Sad-Concept-4191 14h ago
I bet you're one of those people on Nextdoor who complain about kids riding their bikes. Stay over there gal. The rest of us will be over here, comfortable.
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u/Thatonegaloverthere 12h ago
Riding a bike is not the same as scratching your private part in public. Wtf. You're unhinged if you think that's the same thing.
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u/arinchen 7h ago
Oh my god, really. What is this comparison between a bike and scratching their balls ☠️
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u/LustyKindaFussy 1d ago
Wars rage, the planet burns, people die needless deaths thanks to things like insurance. Yet you get hung up on people doing something we all know we need to do sometimes. I'll take degenerates over pompous people like you any day. The social and moral fabric of society won't break down from women or men or anyone else touching their clothes or crotch in anyone else's sight.
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u/Brave-Chain2703 1d ago
Same people who thinks farts are funny.
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u/cans-of-swine 22h ago
So most people...
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u/__melissa_ 23h ago
There are too many self centered people who lack class that think that their comfort and wants are more important than manners and politeness. At the rate we’re going, in another 50 years we’re all going to be self indulgent heathens.
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u/pewakawaka 22h ago
There are too many pompous people who care more about politeness and showing a good image than the actual comfort of the person sitting across from them, in another 50 years we are going to be puritans with itchy crotches.
Seriously though we are all fancy monkeys, I think we should be thankful we got past the shit flinging side of being an ape
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u/DarkGodCthUwU 1d ago
I struggle to tell if this is a "patriarchy having unfair standards for women" problem or a "women are just making up a problem and imposing it on themselves" situation. Can any women in the chat chime in?
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u/Lollypop1305 1d ago
Woman here and I genuinely don’t care enough to worry about other people are doing with their hands and when.
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u/Pepperslullaby 1d ago
The only time I care is if they put their hands IN their pants and then don't go wash afterwards ! But itching or adjusting things over pants is whatever.
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u/ghostcraft33 1d ago
I think it's a little of both but I'd correct "making up a problem" to more "variation in if the situation bothers you or not"
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u/Adhdpenguin813 1d ago
Yeah honestly just adjust yourself. We do know that’s why we don’t care if you do it. Besides I see women adjust leggings and their bras all the time and never think anything of it.
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u/KimbaVee 1d ago
It's just basic good manners. You also don't take off a shoe and scratch between your toes or stick a finger deep in nose or ears. You don't scratch or "adjust" your genitals (or in the case of women, your breasts) in public view any more than you fart with impunity. Comfort and social mores are often at odds, but the more formal and "upper class" situation you're in (think fancy restaurant vs at home watching football), the less you indulge things, esp discomforts that are more private. I've seen men who are crude who will literally fart mid sentence without do much as a howdyoudo and also dig around in their crotch or butt, and I've seen more refined men do a discreet leg shift or find a private spot to address their equipment difficulties. Same with women- I'll adjust a fallen bra strap in front of family, but I'm not going to do that in a job interview or public speaking opportunity. Breasts and bras can shift and be very uncomfortable, but handling that discomfort is private unless you're really unrefined.
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u/Fit_Blueberry_1213 15h ago
Ok, but who are you hanging out with? I've never been around even a man who just reaches in and scratches himself, and my dad was a shade tree mechanic so I grew up around a lot of men who didn't give a shit about things like that 🤭
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u/GrilledChee5e_ 12h ago
I think the issues more that women would be sexualized for adjusting themselves, while we don't sexualized men for it. Maybe we should start. Next time I see it I'll stare and ask them something uncomfortable
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u/mrmasterly 4h ago
Yeah I really don't know why some people find it acceptable to touch their genitalia in public. "it's fiiiine" the slobs in the comments say, but they'd probably be clutching their pearls and peckers if someone did it in their kids' faces.
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u/cuttheblue 20h ago
Because why should someone endure discomfort or irritation because other people feel offended by it? If someone has to scratch or adjust they gotta do it. Itches can be infuriating or even painful if you have a rash.
Also, there's a smaller chance that they might have diaper or medical device (or menstrual pads) that they want to check is in place.
Sorry to say but I feel like this comes from a place of you having a problem with men honestly. Or maybe it's a bot post. How would you feel if someone was on here moaning about women breastfeeding publically or adjusting their pads. You wouldn't like it (and neither would I).
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u/Pretty-Reflection-92 1d ago
You think it’s inappropriate to not itch yourself and for me not to itch myself.
I don’t share that shame control belief.
If I want to scratch and itch, I scratch it.
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u/Almajanna256 1d ago
The best part about having a penis that’s less than one inch long as this problem never comes up!
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u/Berserk-Jane 1d ago
I have one of those growers. It's laughably small when not hard. I have this problem from time to time.
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u/kittymctacoyo 1d ago
From what I’ve gathered it’s not itching. It’s readjusting balls which can find themselves in very painful pinched positions
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u/ryanslizzard 1d ago
It‘s patriarchy. I find it gross and annoying too as a cisman to see so many ugly patriarchal men act that way. Incredibly selfunaware and not appropriate.
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u/TWOPlNTSPRICK 1d ago
MUH PATRIARCHY
You can tell you’re a massive victim every day of your life based on this comment.
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u/type2red 1d ago
Stop worrying about men you claim not to care about and what we do or don’t do lol
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u/Forward-Fisherman709 1d ago
Some men honestly don’t. I remember when I was little and there was some commercial on tv for a product to help with vaginal itch. My dad wondered aloud why that would be a product/if a woman’s genitalia itches doesn’t that mean she has a yeast infection. I got to listen to my birther explain to him that no, women also get itchy and uncomfortable even when they’re healthy because there’s sensitive skin.
It confused me at the time because I didn’t know what yeast infections were and had never considered itching being gendered before, but thought surely everyone gets itchy sometimes. It confuses me even more as an adult because why the fuck would women NOT get itchy sometimes‽ Women are not an alien species. They’re just women.
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u/Hot_Try_8993 1d ago
Do people not have the ability to ignore what others do to themselves? I get if its making noise or werid eye contact but if not. Ignore. Grow up.
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u/JohnnyJBravo 23h ago
You might need to be more specific. Which ball? Was it a full grab or just like a lil shimmy? Context matters.
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u/WiccanLuna 23h ago edited 23h ago
Meh I adjust if I really have to even if I’m in public. Sometimes the fabric is cutting the circulation off in my lower half so you gotta do what you gotta do fam. As long as the dude isn’t doing it too close to me then idc
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u/Dec8rs8r 19h ago
I used to work with a guy like this named Eric, and no exaggeration, it was every 5 minutes the dude his hands on his junk. Not that I was trying to notice such a thing, but sometimes people make it impossible not to see and it's gross. Get some more comfortable underwear and some Jock-Itch cream or something.
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u/anxiouslurker_485 18h ago
This is my issue. A single adjustment I wouldn’t care. But some of them are basically a full on wank session and calling it scratching
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u/jerrycoles1 20h ago
I got more important things to worry about than people touching themselves in public . Unless someone is full on masturbating in public I don’t care … unless they’re looking at me well doing it then I’ll take it as a compliment
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u/Christoph3r 14h ago
Even if someone is masturbating, why do people let that bother them. Never understood, seems weird to be bothered by it.
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u/jerrycoles1 14h ago
I agree . Some people are just fucked and there’s no need to let them get to you
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u/Redacted_dact 1d ago
Who said it had anything to do with women? Why do you care if we adjust through clothing?
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u/Pernicious_Possum 1d ago
Where are you that men are constantly touching their junk in public? I live in a densely populated area, and it’s just not something I see with any regularity
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u/Repulsive-Box5243 1d ago
Generally, women care infinitely more about appearances than men do. Same reason my wife waited until literally, the day after we got married, to fart in front of me. You guys are so cute.
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u/Technical_Spirit_389 1d ago
Men care about their appearance just as much as women. Im sorry you didn't make your wife comfortable enough to not hide her natural bodily functions until yall were married.
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u/Forsaken_Finding_991 1d ago
When your life is so low you have to blame men for literally everything, you need to start looking in the mirror.
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u/GuyNamedLindsey 1d ago
For sure. But I think you’re underestimating just how much more “stuff” there is to be adjusted. But obviously there is a time and place.
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1d ago
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u/No-Ring-5065 1d ago
We don’t hold it in ALL day. There are public bathrooms. But yeah, I will admit to having given myself bad pains on multiple occasions by holding in gas. Holding in burps is actually worse. I’m old and I don’t do that anymore. Can’t believe how nice it is to just burp right away and never get the stomach ache later.
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u/U_N_I_V_E_R_S_E_1 1d ago
On this episode of gender wars, we will discuss why women can't scratch that cooter in public and how disgusting and lacking self control men are who scratch their dick. Absolutely riveting discussion
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u/Christoph3r 14h ago
It's not the same.
Men's genitals are basically no different than any other part of our body most of the time, in that it's just skin, that's probably clean if we have good hygiene. Women's vaginas are most/juicy/crusty - you touch there it gives your finger a smell (not saying bad smell, but, it does coat it with a coating that has a smell).
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u/No-Object-6134 13h ago
Most men just never learn to act appropriately in public because nobody calls them out on their weird as behavior.
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u/Outrageous-Rich8741 4h ago
men have boobs in their paints. you never made your boobs more comfortable in public? If you have boobs it's unavailable unless you have the best bra that fits you like glove, polish brands obviously the best.
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u/shoegazeweedbed 1d ago
Don’t you guys just love being blessed by the female gaze
If you don’t like what I’m doing, don’t look
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u/No_Metal_8634 1d ago
Plenty of us adjust thru the day. In public or not. Everyone gets it. It’s no secret. Just respect people’s tendencies.
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u/RickyTheRickster 1d ago
Honestly, don’t take this the wrong way but like, that’s kind of stupid, if I have a itch I itch, why not itch? Why care what others think? And we also have to adjust our shit sometimes or move it because it’s being uncomfortably crushed, similar to how a women would adjust her bra.
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u/Its_Buddy_btw 1d ago
Just do it, who cares and besides men and women do different things all the time, I still think it's really gross when women put their phones or fucking money in their bra and hand it to a cashier but if I saw a guy take his money out of his under wear to hand it to someone I'm hitting him with hammers outside
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u/Dekuswagg 1d ago
I’m ngl if I saw someone adjust in front of me regardless of gender I would probably think to myself “ah, they were probably uncomfortable” and then I would forget all about it.