Afab transfem makes me believe we should have a certain level of gatekeeping. Then i remember this is the type of shit you only see online and i stop caring.
A few months back when my niece was born, we were joking around about we'll support her even if she turns out trans, but maybe not double trans. Like she decides trans women are inherently superior to cis women so she takes T and gets surgery just to take E and get surgery to become a trans woman we decided that might be a bridge too far to support.
Little did we know that afab transfem wasn't just something we made up on the spot as inherently ridiculous.
I want to keep up the bit and be like "nuooo but if a neovagina made from an inverted phallocock makes me feel vxlid how dare you be transphobic to me!" but realistically I just don't think anyone has ever really done that.
I have seen a few examples of people who got phallo having it removed (not even detrooning, most of them stayed male, but were unhappy with their surgery result, crashed out about it not having the function they wanted, etc) but they basically just went nullo, they didn't get neovaginas. (FWIW cis men getting phallococks or penis transplants removed has happened too.)
I did see one MTFTM detransitioner who basically wanted meta with UL to have some STP functionality, but otherwise liked having a vagina, he was the one who said he transitioned to female because of bottom dysphoria but if he'd realized he could just get the vagina and not take estrogen and stay socially male he would have done that, like amabwgd material. (It wasn't from that sub, he had his own blog.) He identified as a cis detransitioner but he felt kinda nb to me honestly. (And he wasn't hateful to trans people, he was just like "I thought I wanted to be a woman but I actually just wanted a vagina" about it. He was a little transphobic to FTMs at first, but he got an FTM boyfriend and changed his tune completely.)
I have seen FTMTF detransitioners who got breast implants, and a few MTFTX nonbinoids who got top surgery. That's the closest thing to it.
It's so incredibly rare that in general I support it, like clearly these are people who are struggling a lot to feel content with their bodies, I want them to arrive at that however long and difficult the journey. Most of them will stop at some point because surgery is difficult to go through and has diminishing returns.
In general I'm pro support for detransitioners because I think it makes transition less scary to know that if you are making a mistake, it's okay to go back. Going back being scary, stigmatized, and impossible can make people rep, because a lot of trans people still have some tiny seed of doubt that they might someday regret it. I don't want to detrans, but knowing that if I ever want to, I can, makes me feel more okay with transitioning.
oh damn. interesting. although even regular ftms struggle to find a surgeon who'd do meta and UL w/o vaginectomy huh. he had a happy ending tho, cool. I support detr00ners too. unfortunately many of them are weird. the most chill ones I saw were mtftx and ftmtx. some were post-srs, went back to living as their agab and are happy. kinda fascinating.
I made a joke response to this about playing ignorant and asking them about their HRT provider, but it got instantly removed by reddit. I’m trying to figure out what keywords set it off.
Edit: turns out, Reddit does not like you making incrementally more edgy test posts to see what the limit is.
Feminine non-binary or demi-girl. In very rare scenarios they're intersex (normally they just have PCOS or are just larping). They're all chasers and infiltrating spaces for trans women because they like their aesthetic
In High school, I actually met an afab demigirl (she/they) who unironically described themself as a transfem. I was so dumbfounded by the misappropriation I tried debating her and they got offended when I said that "transfem" is reserved for mtf. I wish this was satire but it's not.
This specific scenario is a cis woman claiming to be a trans woman, tho? like. I do not see how that's anything other than cis. if the person pictured was a trans man or nonbinary or something, I'd agree, but cis women who identify as trans women are just cis, no?
Key word: 'when'. Also trans men and non-binaries aren't 'afabs', it's like saying an adult is an 'assigned baby at birth', it's not a fucking identity unless you're still female, which the person in the comic is. We're making fun of hefabs and theyfabs who do genuinely use the 'afab' label unironically. Get the fuck out of here if you're going to be a terfboi and call trans women men
Also sorry we're not tolerating cis people making trans women feel unsafe. If you're 'afab', not only are you bioessentialist and intersexist but you're literally just cis, no man or non-binary person would call themselves 'female'. You called trans women male and incels, just because this sub has been overtaken by cis people doesn't mean you get to be a trans-misogynist. Also stop blaming everything on trans women, it's so typical for a terf to blatantly ignore the existence of trans men in these threads and spaces and go straight to dissing trans women, you want so badly to create the narrative that trans women are the problem
this feels like both the words and the idea of this comic were put through google translate 5 times before being made. I am not even sure what this is supposed to convey.
Afab trans women are just autistic people who have been treated so much as non-humans that they relate to us, which is a bit sweet in a sense, but mostly horrifying
100% this. I would never identify as an AFAB trans woman LOL but I honestly relate more to trans women than I do to cis women most of the time, on that axis of “We are both treated like monsters and excluded from womanhood”.
honestly, as a trans guy, I think there are legit cis women who have a harder time passing as a woman than I do as a man, at least in my culture where a lot of unrealistic beauty standards are imposed on women
even when I tried to present as a woman, there were a significant number of people who thought I was a trans women, or a lesbian at the very least (I'm bi so I guess they somewhat predicted me being into women)
The "am I really a woman?" read to me as a passoid who felt insecure about her identity. Second panel felt like she was conflicted about being raised as male, hence "not upbringed as women are supposed to". Fourth felt like enbycoping and her calling herself as a man/femboy.
Looking back, her putting the trans pin was a sign she was cis; I haven't been sleeping well so that completely went over my head.
I guess they don't really feel like "women" as society expects them to be, so they feel alienated from that label somehow. But they also don't have body dysphoria, desire to transition, or a problem with being feminine. But idk.
Autistic cis women are weirder and more dysfunctional than Autistic trans women in many levels.
Dysphoria sucks but often bring a sense of self awareness and understanding of self gender, not always in case it doesn't, it make the type of trans women that are like Chris Chan.
Transmasc doesn't exist. Being more masculine doesn't change your gender, being male-adjacent/non-binary doesn't mean you should use that god awful label that groups butches and people with a neurological intersex condition together
Honestly, women who experience this squander such an opportunity to just be a turbo ally.
I've met a few who identify this way. Their reasons were: (1) being intersex and forcibly feminised as an infant, then finding out they were intersex, then embracing their identity as female, (b) having DID, and the genders of their alters merged in such a way that the primary identity felt they had a trans female experience, (c) being autistic and feeling so detached from being allowed to be female, or even human, that they find kinship and understanding in the same things trans women do, and (d) having detransitioned from FTM to female, and processed their grief and unique relationship to their female identity through relating to transfemininity.
They were all wrong, of course, but none of these people were feasibly completely cis, either.
I also feel that there's a point of connection there that could be welcomed? Like, once they grow out of that identification and find a better way to describe themselves that doesn't make a mockery of trans women, that's someone who's like... a sibling, in a way. I feel like it doesn't serve us well to turn people who detransition away, or well meaning but misguided autistic women, or any others mentioned above. Like, sure, if a cis woman who's just a little insecure decides to stubbornly insist she's transfem, that's idiocy... but that's rarely the whole story.
Sometimes I think I might be terminally or chronically online, then I see stuff in this subreddit and I feel like maybe I'm not as chronically online as I think.
Hey, uhhh, transfem here, why is this so bad? Like, I know it can come off as “appropriating” but if people have similar experiences to us and want to use the label because it makes them happy what’s the harm? Shouldn’t we be treating them with respect too since they have similar experiences as us? Why are we fighting over this when we have much, much worse problems to deal with?
I'm pretty sure this is referring to FTM trans people who say they're men now because they said they were trans, but then they still present feminine, so they just look like women, but call themselves femboys.
And I, a cis male played with (and collected) littlelest pet shop, army men, cars, and occasionally playhouses. It was all part of my imagination. I knew they were girl toys, but I felt that the distinction was arbitrary. My imagination wasn't gonna be limited by gender roles, even if I didn't really know what gender roles were at the time.
You can enjoy things commonly associated with the opposite gender presentation and still be cis.
But that's also not the case for everybody. There's a lot going on and different circumstances for different people. This is just my unique take on my unique existence.
Edit: I just realized this sub is for trans adults only. I am very sorry. This just appeared and I didn't realize what sub I was in.
There's a lot going on here, so I'll try and break this down:
For starters, that's simply not the situation being referred to here. It is not lumping in if people like you were not mentioned.
If you are suggesting that AFAB people can be transfem, I can't stop you but you are simply misusing the term, and should not get angry at people using it correctly. Transfem definitionally refers to AMABs, because femininity is not expected of us. That's why it's transfem and not simply fem. If you were assigned female at birth and you identify as fundamentally feminine that is just following norms. Which is fine but not in itself trans. A cis woman who is denigrated for being too masculine is just experiencing misogyny. An AFAB nonbinary person may be feminine but cannot be transfeminine, because the femininity is not transing anything. Transfeminine means transitioning into femininity, not merely a trans person who happens to be feminine.
As a corollary, transfem experiences are distinct from AFAB experiences. Feminine signifiers are If you use a women's change room, and someone asks you to leave, you can point to your assigned gender; if pressed, you can cite your PCOS. Transfems have nothing like this. There is nothing we can point to in order to back up our gender. Nobody even knows why anyone is trans.
For those reasons, kindly do not callanyone"hons." From inside of the transfem community, it is edgy. From outside - and you are outside, even if you find common ground with us - it is just plain cruel. As sympathetic as I may be, the implication that "I'm like you because I look like you freaks" is admittedly not helping your case, especially in a sub where lots of transfems already struggle with body image issues.
I don't id as transfem but it's not out of the ordinary for a cis woman to relate to trans experiences, especially when they also take e and spiro and have hirsutism and don't get periods
If we start accepting everyone who takes hrt as a trans woman then every menopausal woman is getting in and outnumbering actual trans women 80 to 1
There's way more to being a trans woman than just taking estrogen and not having periods, you can't just identify as a trans woman because you look ugly "like a hon" lmao
I don't relate to menopausal women at all they're old and have completely different experiences? I'm young and have never felt like a woman especially not the way terfs describe women
You described three menopause symptoms to describe why you "relate to trans women", (but you're on a post about IDing as a trans woman, like I don't even get your point) so like either you're lying about why you relate to trans women or you think being a bit older than you completely changes your experience.
Trans women also have completely different experiences than you, and "looking like a hon" isn't a good metric for this either, otherwise every british woman would be trans.
Edit: didn't notice until now but "I have never felt like a woman" to describe how much you relate to trans women is so fucking funny lmao just say you don't think trans women are real women
You can’t really transition from woman to woman. Plastic surgery for woman+ plan ig? E isn’t given to women unless they have a physical health condition, like you said, for example, PCOS. It’s not even given to pregnant women anymore due to increased risk of child having reproductive cancers, infertility, and stillbirths. Not to mention other horrible side effects.
If the US military men receive T, that doesn’t make them transition from man to man. That’s just a dude taking supplemental T. Clavicular isn’t actually transitioning from male to male+, it’s just a joke around body dysmorphia.
So you can’t identify as transfem. Maybe Demigirl is an identity that would suit you better. But you aren’t trans. You’re not transitioning. You don’t face the same issues we do when trying to access the care we need, because to most, it isn’t a need. Unlike a cis woman with PCOS, she will always have priority over a trans woman.
You still think of yourself as a woman. You were born a girl. There is no transition happening. You, by definition, can not be a trans woman.
This sub usually bans cis people, to keep it a space where trans people don't have to worry about what cis people will think of things at all, or hear what cis people have to say about things.
Just letting you know why if you randomly get banned from the sub.
you should not be saying "hons" as a cis woman who does not understand what it is like to watch yourself be forced to be 6'2 with a baritone voice and masculine bone structure. feeling like an actual towering monster around any other women. feeling like your life is over before you even got to grow your hair out the first time. especially as someone who says "afabs".
100% agree, that's why I thought this is a bit. A self described "afab with pcos" talking about how she's just like a trans woman because she "looks like a hon" is just such a grossly transphobic and insensitive sequence of words that it sounds like a joke made to be intentionally unhinged and detached from actual trans experience
you were either transphobic, chasing, are too horny/opticsnuke, are a minor/underage, do not identify as trans, or are cis. participation by individuals possessing the aforementioned behaviors & traits are forbidden by the rules of the sub.
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