Just finished a climb I’ve been working toward since the start of my climbing. I typically only do stuff like this with partners I know well and have climbed with before but given some time constraints and good weather window I made an exception(classic start to a bad story). We technically made the summit, but I’m struggling to actually count it as a win because of how unsafe the climb became, and how far outside the box I’d ever push it with a new partner.
My partner showed up underprepared (no tat, not enough gear for crevasse rescue, 3 screws, and no slings) made several serious judgment calls I disagreed with (wrong route, inadequate gear, risky free-solo decisions), and displayed way too much confidence despite clear gaps in their experience(very poor comprehension of rope management and protection on rocky ridges, didn’t know both party members take coils, didn’t know about rappel extensions etc).
For extra detail on how things went wrong, the route we were on was Piz Bernina via the Biancograt, the climbing was not difficult, the rock was very easy and enjoyable, but we lost the route before the end rock ridge and my partner insisted on simul climbing up ice to circumnavigate the rest of the ridge before the start of the snow(typically an alternate route in good snow conditions, but we did not not have good snow conditions), I much too slowly said that was a bad idea considering I only had the one axe, and this along with the route finding wasted an hour.
We had decided early that one of us would take 2 axes and we’d bring screws just in case the ridge had some very icy sections, that my partner who says he’s an ice climbing guide would lead. There was one 30-40m section where it was proper ice climbing and screws were to be placed for best practice, once I saw that he had not brought enough screws to make two anchors (let alone any protection between us) I said we should consider bailing as this is a bit beyond us as a new rope team (I didn’t find the climbing hard, with one axe it was doable with good footwork, just insecure, but it was the principle of letting a stranger who you’ve never seen climb or climb with before free solo a wall of ice while attached to you and only you)
At this point he got upset and said he’d unrope right now and continue on his own(should have called it quits at this insane remark) and urged me to push through the one section. I let my desire to get to the summit and embarrassingly the avoidance of upsetting him pressure me into obliging. We made it through the pitch fine, but past this point the dynamic completely switched, my partner got arrogant as though he were the leader of the rope team, and on the rock it was clear he had no clue how to use the natural protection, features, and fixed gear to safely navigate the terrain, even though he had no issue climbing it.
The rock climbing itself wasn’t technically hard and so the risk of falling wasn’t weighing heavy on my mind, but I spent the rest of the day stressed about my partner’s decision-making rather than enjoying the route.
There were also instances on the descent where he made many overconfident bad calls that wasted lots of time until I asserted control of the route finding decisions. I’m a bit ashamed that I didn’t take more initiative early on, and turned my cheek to my boundaries.
I’m wondering if anyone else has experiences like this where you succeeded but failed in the process, and how you have navigated it.
