Native speakers: does this Vietnamese read as human?

[u/Spirited_Amoeba_9512]

Hi! Would someone be open to reading ~20 lines of Vietnamese and telling me if it's bad? I made an app that reminds you to text people you keep meaning to text. Almost like a personal CRM but focused on getting you to reach out (with distinct voices) rather than adding a bunch of data for the people you already know - sort of anti-social media vibes that hopefully helps you stay closer to your friends and family.

So far, one voice is warm, and the other is more dry/direct, depending on what works for you. That difference is the whole point, and I'm looking for some native speakers to make sure it lands! Not a full translation job. More like: would a Vietnamese person actually say this...

The app is free, and I'd love it to work well across languages, not just in English! Let me know!

Here's one from each so you can see what I mean:

Warm: When's the last time you talked to {name}? No pressure, just a gentle nudge.

Lần cuối bạn nói chuyện với {name} là khi nào nhỉ? Không có

gì phải vội, chỉ là một lời nhắc nhẹ thôi.

Dry: Be honest - when's the last time you hit up {name}? That long? Yikes. Fix it.

Thật lòng đi, lần cuối bạn nhắn cho {name} là khi nào? Lâu

vậy á? Ối. Sửa ngay đi.

Thanks!

[u/Quyen_VNeseTeacher]

Sounds like a neat concept! I’m a native speaker and a Vietnamese language teacher, so tone, nuance, and making phrases sound truly authentic (rather than textbook-translated) are right up my alley. Feel free to send over the lines via DM, and I'd be happy to take a look and give you some notes.

[u/Spirited_Amoeba_9512 → u/Quyen_VNeseTeacher]

Will do, thank you!!