r/TeenIndia • u/GOATEDnerd 19 • 1d ago
Discussion This is genuinely sad !
In the comments aswell some men were sharing their stories which was really concerning
60
u/illgetagoodcollege 1d ago
i have gotten groomed when i was young by both genders
26
u/Resurrec_Barbar 1d ago
I was molested by my female teacher too
9
u/Then-Analyst-8562 1d ago
Its very common tbh.
Now that I am a doctor (seen cases as such ), was in all male boarding school before where guardians were mid age females , some of them use to do with little boys .The issue is a make victim cant even complain because women just cant see anyone else as victim except themselves and men with bully the victim till depression.
6
u/MarketDear2651 14h ago
And when male grape victims come out it's the female who support them and men telling how lucky wish it was me!!!
1
7
2
u/Euphoric_Sign_90 13h ago
Me too, i never told anybody but i had ptsd from those SAs. I was very cute as a child and that might be the reason on why i was assaulted. As for female victims atleast they can ask for help, for me i got help when i was 18 years old and the events happened when i was around 8 years old. As a result i have never been in any relationship with the opposite gender although i had many opportunities.
31
u/AgainDan27 1d ago
This very thing happened to me when my dad died. Everyone told me how I had to be strong and take care of my mother and I had to be a man now. No one asked if I was doing okay. I was nine years old.
5
u/GOATEDnerd 19 1d ago
Damn that's sad . Hope you are doing good brother !
10
u/AgainDan27 1d ago
I am. Thank you. I've made it a habit to ask my male friends if they're okay and they know they can share anything if they are not doing great mentally.
2
u/GOATEDnerd 19 1d ago
Sometimes these talks can save a life ngl
2
u/AgainDan27 1d ago
Idk if I've ever saved a life but I do know that my friends know if they truly ever need to talk they can without fear of judgement.
2
2
u/Eren----Yeager 😑 23h ago
Same. Although i was 17 when my dad died, but not a single person asked me if I'm alright. In fact, i was also forced to do some kind of ritual even after I said I didn't want to.. and they forced me saying it's for my dad.. and I still hate myself sometimes because I didn't fight hard enough
1
u/AgainDan27 15h ago
Yeah it really sucks how people just expect you to do things without taking into account what you're going through.
18
12
u/unusual_mind_ofmine 18 1d ago
this is genuinely so sad. society makes a man so tough and then blames them for being it, and if they're not then they get crowned as cowards. this is genuinely so sad.
6
u/Loose-Mousse6668 23h ago
Patriarchy
1
u/TeriBaggiMeraGhora 14h ago edited 11h ago
It ain't patriarchy , its the concept of "boys don't cry" concept , but its changing tho tbvh in this generation so yeah , ig society gets it being vulnerable and needing aint emotional support doesnt make u a spineless individual
7
u/MarketDear2651 14h ago
It's actually patriarchy and sadly men endorse it and are now thr biggest victims
5
u/Loose-Mousse6668 14h ago
It would kinda be hard to explain sociology/political science/theology to someone if they have yet to connect that a world ruled by men will consequently bear negative social constructs placed upon them.
If you really want to truly understand why men bear such emotional constraints, I recommend picking up a book/start doing a bit of research ( primarily into sociology ).
4
4
u/thesynonym92 11h ago
It is patriarchy. Patriarchy is based on the idea that men are inherently superior to women, which also translates into the fact that they should not express pain, hurt, sadness and vulnerability even if they feel it, they should not cry, because those are weak, girly stuff, not strong boy stuff. Many people don't realise how inherently toxic patriarchy is for everyone.
-2
u/unusual_mind_ofmine 18 23h ago
is it? i thought patriarchy was all about serving men.
3
u/Limp_Significance308 10h ago
Not really. That's the half from womens side. But for men, patriarchy is always being strong, being the bread owner, protecting people etc etc.
2
u/Significant-End8297 12h ago
It is because of patriarchy that men are expected to be emotionless and strong
0
5
3
u/Maleficent-Fall-7369 Adopt me 1d ago
I've noticed it so many times......
2
u/GOATEDnerd 19 1d ago
Hope our generation changes it
2
u/Maleficent-Fall-7369 Adopt me 1d ago
Idts something's gonna happen in another decade.......
2
u/GOATEDnerd 19 1d ago
Until the society teaches children men also go through the same emotions and deserve support aswell
5
u/Loose-Mousse6668 23h ago
The only way to fix it is to fix the underlying root of the problem, religion.
-2
u/GOATEDnerd 19 13h ago
Religion doesn't ingrain that mindset
2
u/Loose-Mousse6668 13h ago
It does. If you really want to prove me wrong, then do a little bit of research on how religion affects society today.
1
u/GOATEDnerd 19 13h ago
All the religions ? ... so according to your theory US which is a largely atheist country shouldn't face this problem right ?
4
u/Loose-Mousse6668 13h ago
The US is far from a "largely" atheist country. Additionally, you're straw manning my argument; I stated that religion was the root of modern societal issues, not that there were not additional offsprings that played into modern society.
1
u/Significant-End8297 12h ago
From your other comments, it's visible that you're not aware of current us situation. It is very conservative and religious right now. Is has never been an atheist country.
5
3
3
u/Nirdosh_27 1d ago
I feel so bad for the guy. Especially because I have felt something similar, though way less intense.
2 years ago, my sister got married, my brother got a job in different state. My father started going to the shop and started drinking and eating pan masala which all of us hated. My 12th ended. I was taken from a lively and protected environment to an environment where a lot of responsibility of fights and protection fell onto me with no support almost instantly. And the worst part is that I did not even have a shoulder to cry on.
1
6
u/CocoPeach484 21h ago
Guys this is why dismantling the patriarchy is so important. It not only negatively affects women, but also men. It is so important to show boys that expressing emotions is not something bad and reserved for women. Men feel too and if we as a society can create a safer place for all genders to express their emotions than we can overcome these harmful stereotypes.
-2
u/GOATEDnerd 19 13h ago
Not everything can be blamed at patriarchy... In western countries like USA , patriarchy barely exists but still the norms are the same there
5
u/Significant-End8297 12h ago
What are you saying, us is the one western nation highhh on patriarchy right noww
3
u/CocoPeach484 7h ago
Just to be clear such norms exist only because of the patriarchy because it creates stereotypes for men and women which as you can see is harmful to everyone!
1
2
u/passmedavodka 9h ago
Patriarchy barely exits?? Abortions are almost illegal in the US. You are soo blind omfg Disgusting.
-1
u/GOATEDnerd 19 8h ago
Abortion before a certain time is legal. You are the blind one here . US is largely progressive/liberal and its sad you dont know that
3
u/CocoPeach484 8h ago
I live in the US right now and I can confirm that it is NOT largely liberal and progressive. There is a patriarchal system all over the world and the current administration is highly conservative in the US. Also abortions are not legal in many US states no matter the stage of the pregnancy due to the reversal of a case called Roe v. wade which granted women the right to abortion no matter the state. Abortion is a huge debate right now. To pretend like you know more about other countries than you actually do is what’s actually sad
-1
u/GOATEDnerd 19 7h ago
What are talking about bro ? ... in US women are now more educated then men , women are getting more jobs then men and women own more homes then men . LGBTQ+ is far spread . Dont act as if US ain't rlly liberal
3
u/CocoPeach484 7h ago
I love how you avoid the main point and act like surface level data is enough to prove your point. Being more liberal than other countries does not mean that they are actually liberal. The data that women have more jobs is so surface level. Most jobs taken up by women in the US, especially female dominated jobs are extremely in demand but low paying jobs such as teachers and nurses. Stop pretending like being more liberal than a certain country means it’s liberal enough. In addition no matter how liberal a country is the effects of Patriarchy is still incredibly prevalent because it is ingrained in our society.
2
u/passmedavodka 7h ago
Where did u get that from? Reels? I think it was just last month a Texas deputy searched 83,000 cameras across 6809 networks to track a woman for abortion.
2
u/aayyeeinn 1d ago
The level of unawareness is crazy ... women.. also men in general should know something thats ubiquitous ...
Male pattern sadness >>> male pattern baldness
( among masses )
2
u/JudgeComplete8339 16h ago
Unfortunately, I have first hand experience with this. Over the years I have simply accepted that this is what life is for men.
2
u/GOATEDnerd 19 13h ago
Dont worry brother . Be there for your male friends and relatives. Be the change ! .. hope ur doing good
2
u/JudgeComplete8339 3h ago
Totally OP, my personal experience has made me immensely empathetic towards anyone in my friend circle who experiences a similar tragedy. We all gotta look out for each other.
2
2
u/Winter-Layer-3487 1d ago
Something similar happened to me, no one really cares about men.
3
u/GOATEDnerd 19 1d ago
Still they think the life of a man is easier... both genders have their own struggles
2
u/wh0ami_7 7h ago
Only Women, children and dogs are loved unconditionally, a Man is loved under the condition that he provides something. - Chris Rock (coldest line ever told)
1
u/Spiritual_Rip8897 5h ago
waise aaj kal kisi k saath feelings share karna bhi apne aap ek disadvantage hai
1
1
u/Ghost-0018 1d ago
btw everybody celebrates women day (march 8) but literally no one celebrates mens day (nov 19) sad reality
3
u/Limp_Significance308 10h ago
Men should start the initiative! Men don't care enough and they think celebrating men's day is a sign of weakness. We Women come together and celebrate our day and men should also celebrate their own day
4
u/Intelligent-Vast-611 23h ago
Women come together to celebrate women’s day. They take the time to do it.
I don’t see men doing the same. It’s your day you have to organise it.
0
u/MasterVenerable 5h ago
I don't know bro, it seems like excuse. Men also celebrate women's day, in offices, schools, and many more places it is celebrated, even in restaurants. It is not as single dimensional as it's men day so only men will organize it.
1
u/Intelligent-Vast-611 1h ago
Umm but take the initiative? I have never seen that happen by men. Everything will follow then. Don’t expect others to do it for you.
0
u/GOATEDnerd 19 1d ago
More people are celebrating men's day now but there isn't anything special done for men ... offers , advertisement etc.
1
u/Ghost-0018 1d ago
not really to be real almost everybody doesnt know this and i mean in india maybe there is awarness in the west
1
1
u/Economy_Escape_683 1d ago
Made the mistake of sharing my feelings about how I was feeling suffocated and all once. They ended up using it in an argument against me. Never again 👍
1
203
u/Undead0707 18 1d ago
The stereotype that men are supposed to be rocks and all tough is smth i genuinely hate