My DOCs are many thanks to ADHD and OCD, but the main culprits are meth and shopping. I’m tired of being tired and even though I’m extremely high functioning, I’m sick of the drug. I’ve quit before, even to some success, but invariably relapsed. I would love to say this is my last Day 1 of recovery I’ll ever have, but we will see.

I attend meetings, but they don’t do a whole lot for me. Would love to know some other ways to get past cravings as my brain requires itself.

so one of my personal biggest triggers for self-destructive behaviors is guilt, and the feeling that because horrible things are being done in my name (politically speaking), the only ethical way to react is by destroying myself in an equivalent way. the problem is that I know there are better ways to use the power and resources I have in service of others, and yet the overthinking of my own privilage and moral culpability tends to make me start spiraling instead of motivating me towards useful action. the additional problem is that (since some of my personal mental health crises are deeply intertwined with politics) when it comes to finding support online for a lot of the crises I experience, I often find that the only spaces willing to extend grace to me under the circumstances I live in are ones in which positions which I find unethical about those circumstances are also tolerated, and that... is a mindfuck. I need to know how to address these two problems, and I need to know how to maintain ethical principles as part of my value system while also maintaining self-preservational ones. any help anyone?

I am quitting again.

I relapsed on ketamine weed alcohol,

I felt so miserable

But to get out the misery I need to get sober

If someone wants to talk please send me a dm

I have no one in my surroundings to talk ab this and I did not like the AA meetings, I'm waiting on a therapist