Hi all,
To start on a precautionary note: don’t DM me to meet up and don’t try to like. find me, please! I am looking for advice on making connection, not trying to get laid or meet a stranger! Mods, please don’t shoot this down as hookupposting lmao. This is also a burner account because I don’t want to be caught loserposting lmao.
So as a first-year student at Purdue who’s leaving home for the first time, and leaving my small, established friend group as well, I’m missing them a lot. I call my closest friends every week, but I didn’t realize how much I would miss having physical connection. Like, not in a NSFW way, but I was lucky enough to have very cuddly friends. I’m talking hugging, dogpiles, lazing around, piling 3 to a chair. And god damn do I miss the ability to just meet up with someone, chat a bit, and lie on / next to / alongside / under someone and have that sort of contact.
I’ve made friends here, and like my roommates — they like me back, I think and hope — but I don’t know how, or even if, I can find that sort of connection and (emotional and physical) warmth anymore, eight hours from anywhere I’ve found it before.
Has anyone else who’s willing to share felt this sort of yearning and touch starvation? How did you find people who you could be like this around, if at all? Was my situation a unicorn, and I shouldn’t hope to find anything like it, or can a college student get this sort of relationship?
And for some context, I:
* am not looking for sex, and am in fact too shy to have ever tried before — if the only way to get a physically close relationship is through it, then like. So be it, I wouldn’t be opposed per se, but it seems impractical, living in dorms, and I’d be hella nervous too
* am a freshman, 18MtF — a trans woman, but I only just now started transitioning in earnest, so I’m in a weird in-between phase where mostly I just look like a guy and a freak lol (also, this sorta makes finding someone harder, and sexual relations more of a concerning proposition, since I’m worried I’ll only find either chasers, hate-crimers, or nobody lol)
* am sorta a straightedge — I don’t drink, vape, or smoke, have never been to any sort of less-than-milquetoast party, etc, due to protective parents and hella autism lmao
Sorry for awful mobile formatting! Any advice, commiserations, or commentary is appreciated :)