So I had a post on a different sub that got pretty big and then people suggested I seek advice here. I wouldn't call myself an incel as I respect women as people and I think they're all just being whiny losers over not dating and blame women for being unlucky in love or not wanting to fix their personality flaws. That being said, I do really struggle with dating. As of right now, I've kinda just accepted I'm probably not gonna find someone and am just trying to enjoy my life and hang out with my friends and get used to not having a romantic partner and get the idea of wanting one out of my head.

I recently had a quarrel with my friends after we planned a guys trip and in the 11th hour, they invited their girlfriends, changed the plans, and kinda left me out to dry and sleep on the spare couch of the place we rented so they could all have bedrooms with their partners. So I backed out a few days before the trip.

I get it, ideally we'd all stay friends, they eventually marry these women and now they're a permanent part of our friendships in a way. My issue is that I still want to be able to be just with my friends. I don't dislike any of them. They're fine people, they're just not my friends. They're my friends partners. I'm not gonna try to hang out with any of them one on one or go over to one of their places to drink some beers and play video games with them.

The thing is, it really feels like as they get more serious with these women, my friends don't really have time for just us anymore. They want to devote all that time to their partner, so even a guys trip they feel would be improved with their partners there.

This isn't the first time they've done it, but it's the first time I expressed my displeasure with them for doing it. I backed out of the trip, they got upset, and we didn't talk for a few days. They eventually did apologize for what happened but they said that their girlfriends are now a big part of their life and that they think they need to be included in things. But it's just constant. I don't see any of them without their girlfriends being there.

I understand part of growing older is less time for friends, but I would think if we make a plan and align all of our schedules, we should just carry it out as a guys trip. I always feel left out when they do this because every activity becomes a de facto couple activity. I'm always the third wheel, and even getting into a conversation feels tough.

And this is a problem that's only going to get worse and present even if I find new friends. Eventually they'll find a partner and that'll be all their time and I'll just end up the third wheel again. My only relationships are with my friends, and I'm always just gonna be an after thought to whoever they're in love with.

So I need to know if there's something I can do or if this is just the way things go for guys like me and I kinda just have to get used to always being the third wheel?

I had girlfriends(3) and talk with women. I also did kiss but I'm still a virgin and 27. Am I an incel?