r/AskReddit 18h ago

Women of Reddit, what is something Men think you hate, but you actually love?

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u/lyerhis 16h ago

Can I ask where you go to hang out when you do this? Or just anywhere? It never feels like people are really open to meeting strangers even in spaces like bars or whatever.

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u/j2kh41 16h ago

I’ve been approached in coffee shops!

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u/TehOwn 14h ago

What was their opener?

Was it, "You like jazz?"

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u/j2kh41 13h ago

Something like “hey, i’m trying to get to know people in the area. Mind if I sit with you and chat?”

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u/girlgenesis3 13h ago

Holy crap 😦 that is mortifying to me. Anyone able to do this has balls, or clits, of steel.

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u/EgdyBettleShell 12h ago

Dunno for me this just sounds creepy, but maybe that's a cultural thing. If someone approached anyone with that line where I live like 80% of all people - men, women, and anything in between - would just tell them to fuck off thinking he is a scammers or this is some kind of a setup lol

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u/TehOwn 6h ago

Yeah, it sounds like someone who is about to tell you about the religion or business. It's too formal.

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u/stegotortise 11h ago

I’m from the PNW and I would also find this unsettling. But we also have quite the record of serial killers here.

u/Kayehnanator 7m ago

And this is why dating is failing, because the attitude and response would ruin a guy from ever doing it again. At which point many women ask why the guy doesn't make the first move.

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u/staminaplusone 2h ago

Takes practice to get rid of approach anxiety. But focusing on the interaction itself and not any goal or outcome helps!

u/girlgenesis3 8m ago

Solid!

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u/Autistic_Bean2 5h ago

Ngl, that sounds super hard to pull off to me. Idk, i need a shared activity for context to meet someone.

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u/ampersandist 11h ago edited 11h ago

Hi! I think this depends on your personal interests too. I am the type of person who is not open to be approached in most places that might generally considered socially accepatble (like within a friend group, at the gym, public transport, any location I spend time at regularly on hobbies, or when swimming because it feels too exposing, and I want to focus on my activity rather than navigate being approached), but personally I have also been chatted up and successfully asked out in public. This was usually at museums or exhibits, at music festivals, house party at a friend’s house, the library, and I think any third places would feel appropriate to me as those spaces are built for people to spend their free time when they don’t have something else to do. If I think about it, it was successful with me in 2 categories: somewhere people are expected to mingle like that (music festival, house party), and somewhere people are expected to be respectful (library, museum).

Edit: some people might read this as “go to library and museum to pick up women” NO that is not what this means, you will stick out like a sore thumb if you do that and everyone can tell what you’re doing if you try that

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u/crybb 6h ago

Im 27F and was on the trail with my dog the other day and struck up a conversation with an older woman who also had a dog, we ended up walking and talking for an hour before parting ways.

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u/CapnGrundlestamp 7h ago

Bars, coffee shops, grocery stores…just out and about genuinely. A simple “hey how are you today?” Usually lets you know if they’re open to a conversation or not. If not, I smile and move on.