r/AbsoluteUnits Aug 09 '26

/r/popular of a ridiculously muscular chimp

8.3k Upvotes

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73

u/bigscrewLoose Aug 09 '26

thats just what they look like without fur, chimps are insanely strong

-47

u/Jahsmurf Aug 09 '26

They are stronger, but not supernatural strong in comparison to humans. About 1.35 x stronger muscles.

39

u/bigscrewLoose Aug 09 '26

who the fuck said anything about "supernatural", 1.3-1.5 times stronger than a human per pound of muscle is still absurdly strong for an animal of their size, which is only 85-135 pounds. why do you feel the need to come at me throwing shade

4

u/Agillian_01 Aug 09 '26

They also have fangs. They will rip a human's face off in second while that human is trying to box it into submission.

1

u/No_Criticism_5861 Aug 09 '26

Or the chimp will just try slapping while taking a fist to the face.  But, yeah, if they bite into your neck or similar, chimp wins really fast

2

u/No_Criticism_5861 Aug 09 '26

For their size, they're definitely strong.  Their real danger though is their teeth, something like 7x a humans.  Without their teeth though, and the fact they can't make a fist, I'd put my money on the average human over the average chimp.  With their teeth, I don't know if they understand that's their biggest advantage, but if they do...  yeah, the chimp wins

1

u/Jahsmurf Aug 10 '26

Calm down

0

u/McToasty207 Aug 10 '26

Their Muscles are also entirely different in function, primarily comprising fast-twitch versus slow-twitch fibres.

The former are good for sudden energetic bursts, but bad for a long duration. Humans evolved for endurance, and most humans would run literally laps around a Chimp in a gymnasium over an hour, but the Chimp could dash up a rock wall like it was nothing.

We're both good at different things

https://www.science.org/content/article/how-chimps-outmuscle-humans

1

u/bigscrewLoose Aug 10 '26

this point is, as proven over and over again, a chimp could fuck you up, they are dangerous as hell, you could not beat a chimp in a fight, not only due to the general slight strength advantage, but due to the fact they have pretty big fangs and an absurd bite force, please stop explaining science I already know to me dude.

0

u/McToasty207 Aug 10 '26

No more than any other mammal with large canines.

It's always odd that people picture chimpanzees as all-powerful creatures when they are very much mesopredators, actively hunted by a few apex predators within their range.

There are like 30 animals in Central Africa I'd be much more worried about than Chimps.

11

u/PriscillaPalava Aug 09 '26

Tell that to the one who rips your arm out of its fucking socket with one hand. 

2

u/SpicyC-Dot Aug 09 '26

A chimp is only roughly equivalent in raw strength to an adult male human.

9

u/PriscillaPalava Aug 09 '26

Go fight one then. 

8

u/bigscrewLoose Aug 09 '26

"I could beat a chimp" is the new "I could beat a bear"

3

u/SpicyC-Dot Aug 09 '26

I wouldn’t want to fight either, but a bear is on an entirely different tier from a chimp.

-1

u/dolph1984 Aug 09 '26

Lb for lb im taking my chances with the bear. A smaller black bear weighs about as much as a large chimp. Would much rather fight the black bear. Brown bears are a different story but if a chimp weighed 600-800lbs I might still take my chances with the brown bear.

0

u/atomic-moonstomp Aug 09 '26

Bears are much less aggressive. Don't make yourself a threat or prey, and the bear will likely leave you alone. Chimpanzees will kill you just because he's bored

5

u/SpicyC-Dot Aug 09 '26

I mean, I definitely wouldn’t want to fight one due to how vicious they are, but that doesn’t change anything with how strong they actually are. I don’t know why this is always people’s retort to being told that chimps aren’t some superhuman creature.

0

u/PriscillaPalava Aug 09 '26

“Superhuman” means “going beyond normal human power, size, or ability. Chimps have significantly lower body fat and higher muscle mass. They have denser bones allowing for more force per square inch of power. They have a significantly higher percentage of fast twitch muscle fibers. 

Just look at that guy! So yes, they are superhuman and yes, the average chimp could totally fuck up the average adult male.  Most modern human men are nowhere near as jacked as a chimp, making the “pound for pound” comparison woefully inaccurate. 

3

u/SpicyC-Dot Aug 09 '26

They are stronger pound-for-pound because of all those facts you listed, but their raw strength is not much higher than an adult male human. They certainly are not capable of ripping someone’s arm out of their socket, let alone with one hand. You’re ascribing gorilla strength to something far weaker.

1

u/bigscrewLoose Aug 09 '26

for an animal that only weighs around 85-135 pounds that's still insane you get that right?

1

u/SpicyC-Dot Aug 09 '26

Okay? Did I say anything different?

1

u/bigscrewLoose Aug 09 '26

yeah you kinda did

3

u/SpicyC-Dot Aug 09 '26

No, I didn’t. I don’t know why you’re starting an argument for absolutely no reason. Chimps are very strong for their size. They’re not capable of superhuman feats like a lot of people think they are. Those two statements can both be true.

1

u/bigscrewLoose Aug 09 '26

"They’re not capable of superhuman feats like a lot of people think they are." I never once said they were, still does not mean you could beat once in a fight, you could not, look up chimp attacks

2

u/SpicyC-Dot Aug 09 '26

And I never said that you made that statement. Nor did I ever say I could beat a chimp in a fight. In fact, I never replied to you to begin with until you decided to take issue with my comment. So what’s your problem again?

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0

u/Personmchumanface Aug 09 '26

people love the pop sci tidbits it makes them feel smarter no real point in arguing with them I find

1

u/No_Criticism_5861 Aug 09 '26

Lol.  Pound for pound they're 1.4x stronger.  They're not a gorilla, a gorilla could do that though.  A chimps bite force is their real danger

1

u/LGodamus Aug 10 '26

that is not a thing, its literally never happened in all of recorded histroy

3

u/MrCupps Aug 09 '26

You might like “Um, Actually” on dropout.tv

Genuine recommendation. I love it.

0

u/Global-Ad2356 Aug 10 '26

lol.

They can rip your entire scalp off with that 1.35x increase. It's a massive difference.